another anonymous journal

autism, bpd, + schizotypal thoughts

[emptyprescription]

[unclaimedbody]

i’m still getting over the fact that you will never pay for what you did.

but i will. i have to live with that for the rest of my life. it doesn’t go away.

[unclaimedbody]

how could you do that to someone?

[unclaimedbody]

i don’t want to be like this. i just want to go home.

but where is home?

[unclaimedbody]

why can’t i just feel things like a normal person? why does it have to be so much?

i’m so tired.

[unclaimedbody]

i’m sorry i’m not ever enough.

[unclaimedbody]

how can i save you when i can’t even save myself?

[unclaimedbody]

why is every relationship always one-sided?

[unclaimedbody]

are you ever going to fucking apologize?

[unclaimedbody]

nothing really matters anymore. no matter how hard i try, they will never pay for what they did.

[unclaimedbody]

you leaving me on read is basically the same as telling me you hate me and want me to die.

[unclaimedbody]

i’m at my breaking point.

[unclaimedbody]

you destroyed me.

and you don’t even care.

[unclaimedbody]

i’m not even living anymore, i’m just surviving through my own mind’s torment.

[unclaimedbody]

i’m suffocating in my own mind.

[unclaimedbody]

so. fucking. exhausted.

[unclaimedbody]

why am i always the second choice?