Darwinism At Its' Finest

I like big butts (trust me, I cannot lie). LdnOnt. (She/her)

[iguanamouth]

im totally fucking serious i want the next sci-fi movie blockbuster to be about exorcising the ghosts of malevolent dinosaurs

[iguanamouth]

i just lost a follower well guess whos not getting tickets to the opening night of velocigeist: revenge of the cretaceous 

[khiroshige-deactivated20221210]

[kit-harington]

[hashtagloveloses]

[teesadutta]

[sarcastic-clapping]

honestly “interview with the vampire” was Next Level Gay for 1994 and i thank god every day for those petty bisexual vampires and their deeply troubled marriage

[hauntbaby]

Just heard a kid say “you’ve opened a can of worms, now lay in it.” More effective and terrifying than the originals tbh. 

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

Honestly in all of these stories these poetic white men who somehow end up immortal get so bored and miserable because they just sit in their mansion all day doing whatever it is they need to do in order to sustain their immortality and then they just throw lavish parties and organize orgies or whatever and then they’re like “why am I sad I eat three course meals and have at least one orgy daily what MORE could I POSSIBLY need??”

Like???? Damn go for a walk. Do you even KNOW your neighbors? Get a dog and take it to the park. Set up an elaborate fish tank. Go skiing like you’ve been alive for 200 years and you’ve spent 180 of it in your house looking at paintings and drinking wine with other rich assholes no wonder ur life sucks my man.

Buy a canoe.

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

this post was specifically targeting dorian grey.

[tokijin-deactivated20170926]

me when no one is paying attention to me

[zabreneva]

Schrodinger’s Nap: where you are both too tired to do things and awake enough to not fall asleep so you just lie in bed with your eyes closed suffering.

[unexpectedleaf]

I lost weight, I met an amazing boy, I started clean eating, I live at the beach, and I love myself. 🌞❤️

[minervamax-blog]

A flamingo.

Dancing.

To bagpipes.

In an airport.

I feel like this is the result of some celestial being’s game of madlibs. (x)

[barafurbear]

this is everything I’ve ever needed

[pad96foot]

@unexpectedleaf

[unexpectedleaf]

@pad96foot it's like God or Vishnu or You knew I needed this in my life

[iraffiruse]

[pleatedjeans]

I’m so there. [x]

[unexpectedleaf]

200 each or 200 collectively? Game changer.

[dorkyshidae]

RuPaul’s Drag Race Top 3. From Season 1 to 8.

[unexpectedleaf]

I may not understand how Wifi works or how to fix my computer and you may not know how to choose a coffee maker or find the perfect fitting pair of pants but I do understand I absolutely love you and there's nothing I can't do without you... And appropriate footwear.

[unexpectedleaf]

This is such a little thing but he'll always DD, and I trust him enough to just toss him my keys. He'll always make sure I get home safe and it just means a lot to me.