Kaiver

For the reading and the dreaming

[unowensorrow]

To watch, to read, to listen, to learn, to comprehend, to imagine, to dream, to create, to recommend.

A mixed archive of literature, media, music and more. Warning for spoilers

(basically a diary of my fixations)

Main account: @dreamarchiviste

Currently: Malevolent, Pacific Rim

[bloodyhandprint]

sorry to anyone who followed me for anything. you're not getting that

[unowensorrow]

Confession time:

Uh, would it be weird to admit that I was more worried about Colt's back than I was the actual romance. I kinda let it go, but my first reaction to Jody repeatedly had him do the stunt that was him hitting his back and then pretty much airing to everyone in the stunt team their relationship issues was 'gurl I know u mad but that's still not the way to go'. I'm no doctor but I don't think even two yrs is enough for him to reasonably not have his back constantly aching with the continuous action. Not to excuse that what he did didn't hurt her, but still, just doesn't really sit right, that was not okay to do.

[unowensorrow]

Fr had a mild conniption when I saw this whilst watching The Fall Guy

*flashbacks*

[unowensorrow]

Had to complete the trinity, 3 for 3 (he doesn't have an oxygen mask to match but bear with me)

Guess which is which: a guy who was shot, a guy who broke his back, and a guy in a coma walk into a bar (I'm sure there are better jokes out there. My first was: a guy who broke his back falling, a guy who was shoved from the back, and a guy whose back could probably use a break)

Whose next in our hospital line up?

[unowensorrow]

In the process of avoiding newmann, I tripped straight into chaleigh. . . (deja vu ppl? or is that just me?)

[monsterblogging]

Quotes from the Pacific Rim commentary re: Guillermo del Toro's aesthetic decisions

"You cannot do world creation without filling in with texture and detail."

...

"People think that world creation - movie, for example - is the big gestures. But it isn't. It's all this small details. Look at the markings. Look at the vehicles that open the doors. Look at the banners and the markings in the crawler that moves the robot. Everything is full of detail. We designed this."

....

"We going to what I call gothic tech, or goth tech. Which is to go right away into a world that is rusting, that is in decay, where you have the concrete is cheap, the paint is chipping off, the armors in the robots is dented, it's sort of pitted and they feel like knights, like these ancient knights, and we start accumulating, for example, atmosphere."

...

"I wanted the movie to be very romantic, but not romantic in the Harlequin novel sense or the romance novel sense of the word. I wanted it to be romantic in its epicness. You know, I wanted it to feel like an opera. I wanted it to feel dramatic. So instead of doing this in a well-lit street in New York I wanted this first fight to happen in an almost like, the middle of a romantic painting, like Caspar David Friedrich is a romantic painter I adore. And I wanted very much for it to happen in the rain in the middle of a tempest in an ocean where the waves are crashing into them. And the water throughout the movie becomes an incredibly complex expressive element."

...

"We're going to go from the biggest, the widest, to the little bug of a pilot crawling out of the helmet. Isolate Raleigh. You know, we isolate Raleigh. I'm telling the story: Look at the markings on his suit, the burn marks on his skin, those are going to become scars that he's going to carry for the rest of the movie. And I'm telling you this is when we started losing. This was the price for arrogance, this was the price for youth, and we're staining the white with red. I'm trying to build a character not just by the work of the actor, but by the storytelling with audiovisual elements."

...

"And look at this, Raleigh's all introduced in this one color, he'd golden, gold colors, and he's all coated in warm greens and earth tones and the light that is bathing him is always golden, and it's about that color coming together with Mako's dominant color, and Pentecost in this case, which is connected with Mako, which are blue."

...

"So this, we come to the scene where they meet for the first time. And I have color-coded this scene entirely in those two colors, in the blue and the ambers. You know, the bright ambers and the blue, the sort of cyan blue. And this is Mako meeting Raleigh, so the entire thing needs to be color-coded like that. And Mako's blue, because I'm making her origin to the kaiju, the kaiju blue, the blood of the kaiju - but also you will see in a few minutes a memory. A memory that is all color-coded in blue and splashes of red in her past as a child. And that blue has stained her hair. Even her hair has this strands of blue because she cannot get rid of that memory. She carries it in her."

...

"We color-coded, for example, the Chinese robot, we color-coded it red and gold and is patterned after medieval armor, and it needs to feel Chinese in essence, it needs to respond to martial arts movements; its musical theme is very strong."

...

"And here again we have now a robot, a Jaeger, that is designed, a mech that is designed to resemble a T-series Russian tank, color-coded like that, with like a cooling tower from a nuclear reactor on top."

...

"And we introduce Striker Eureka, the Australian Jaeger, which is designed a little bit like an all-terrain vehicle and color-coded with the outback camouflage colors and is the most masculine of the robots, of the Jaegers, of the mech, and is very much testosterone-driven."

...

"We talked about the color red; well, here it becomes very important. We have these characters fighting that is very very color-coded to be warm; we have a lot of reddish art direction here. We color-coded this arena in black and red. The stakes, the wood, the machines, the color of the light hitting the machines, the symbols on the wall, everything is permeated with red. Because again, I wanted red to symbolize sort of the heart. And Mako's going to find her heart and Raleigh's going to find his heart, or life, by connecting with Mako. We saw him bleeding - the last time we saw red with any importance other than the Chinese robot was when he was bleeding in the beach."

...

"And again, red coming in and linking these three characters; these three characters are the heart of the movie, you know. And blood for nobility and mortality is what makes us human. And Pentecost and Raleigh and Mako are the heart of the film."

...

"And now we start bringing, literally, bringing the crazy colors into the film. I wanted to color code this movie, bring it as close as possible to a living anime, or a living incarnation of a magazine that was very important for me growing up, which is Heavy Metal with Angus McKie, Richard Corben, Chris Foss, all these guys working with super primary colors, and I wanted to bring that saturation of colors to this, and for that I needed Hannibal Chau to meet Newt in Hong Kong."

...

"In shooting the film, we then came to the final moment and again, these three characters, Mako, Raleigh, and Pentecost, which have existed in a blue-amber world start to come to a red space, you know? This is the first time we used this red space properly in this film. Other than the Chinese robot, we were very careful with not coding anything in red. But now, at the end of the adventure, everybody's coming away. And at the end of the life, at the end of their life, that is Mako, Raleigh, everybody's gonna find this light is red. And now I can talk to you about the way I sort of organized the three fights for Raleigh. I wanted one fight with the kaiju to be the fight where he loses someone. He loses his brother in the beginning. That's where he bleeds red, you know? Then the second fight in Hong Kong is where he gains a partner. He loses a partner in the first fight, he gains a partner on the second fight. And in this final fight, he saves that partner. So, it's a full circle. I show him in the construction area in the beginning sitting in a sort of throne of concrete, if you remember, when he meets Pentecost; he made an incomplete circle. And here he completes that circle."

[unowensorrow]

Markiplier forgetting he ever playing little nightmares I and forgetting he mentioned forgetting he played the game. And now, he's playing little nightmares II. Lmao. I did watch jacksepticeye play both already, I'm just here for the reactions. I'm betting he's gonna brute force this thing (watching him and jack play silent hill f for comparison).

[unowensorrow]

PART 3 is out. ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧

[unowensorrow]

A Haunting in Venice (2023)

Next movie after Death in the Nile. Each case of Hercules Poirot has different cast members, we see different people. This time the theme centers on children, ghosts and their vendettas left behind, set in lovely Venice.

Opening to Poirot and his lovely retirement home as mentioned last movie (that we all know he's not actually gonna do anytime soon, retiring that is). I can only dream of having the same, my own vegetable garden and only accepting deliveries of pastry. Good for him, though I also think that he's the type to probably get restless at some point. And he's not actually that heartless, he would help, especially when the murder cases keep being shoved on his face.

Each movie has their own lesson, Murder on the Orient Express had Hercules learn that not every situation is clearly black and white, that it can also be shades of grey, a case of justice enforced by vigilante means vs the law. Death on the Nile, love makes fools of us all, that it also clouds one's moralities, love that's used to justify crime. Now, ghosts, metaphorical or literal, whether one believes it or not, they have a way of haunting us, trauma and guilt and how we let it affect us. It also says something that in such a case they were willing to immediately blame it on the supernatural. I'm really now hoping for the next adaptation, or prolly reading the books lol

I love, love, love the cinematography, I could stare at the visuals all day. I read that Agatha's second husband was an archeologist and they traveled a lot, so her works' settings have been influenced by those. The purpose of the settings are also key in story telling, the space in which your story takes place. How the train, boat, and haunted building is the limit and they have their own vibe. You need, not just the knowledge but also skills to really be a good detective, you never know when your knowledge about flowers helps you determine that you've been drugged by them. A small thing you would deduce as insignificant, like maybe knowing that blood will leave brown stains not pink. Situational awareness too, to be clever enough to account for the environment, tools, people present. Accounting for alibis and motives laid out like this, it's very much paranoid in nature, which I say is justified with a killer on the loose. It may seem cold, but truthfully people have been murdered for more or less.

I do get annoyed when people shove it in his face that he's cold, heartless, and arrogant. He's certainly prideful in his work as the detective Hercules Poirot (he earned it tho), he's not entirely without sympathies, he learns from his mistakes and can be amendable to being proven wrong as long as nobody's committing a crime (murders really). He has his eccentrics, his ocd, and paranoia, suspecting everyone (justified most of the time, each character has their own agenda, in his experience). I guess it's part of his charm anyways, he's mostly portrayed alone, people coming in going through his life. The other characters having their own agenda, half the time, make solving the case much more complicated if only because when it's revealed that we've been chasing the wrong trail, enough times been wasted and another murder gets committed *sigh* (the beauty of complex characters to be honest, real people won't just stand and wait if something's happening). I didn't like the author in this one, that she would go all that way to supposedly knock him down a peg, it's just kinda petty.

[unowensorrow]

Death on the Nile (2022)

Hercules Poirot, I watched Murder on the Orient Express (2017) years ago but I do still remember the plot, it was wild. Would totally recommend, an emotional rollercoaster at the end, its best watched to understand.

Hints about the motives and possible murderer(s) being shoved in your face from the beginning and also the entire time. The how is also hinted through small seemingly innocuous things. If you're just gonna read the circumstances as they're presented, you'll just be following a lot of red herrings. Such murder mysteries by Agatha Christie actually delves deep on the characters of everyone, nobody's one-dimensional is one of the things I love about her works, everyone's an onion really. Everyone is complicated, themes of love, justice and guilt are explored by way of needling the characters in situations like these. Really good for exercising the brain, has one questioning when the case is finally solved how you missed that but you also know that if you were in that situation, you couldn't have gotten it.

I wanna delve through it all, but it's best to be experienced personally imo. If nothing else, everything that happens is done on purpose, even the red herrings go be honest. The novels might be better in detail, if you prefer reading. For this movie I would say, "the things we do for love". I wouldn't call it a happy ending either, this movie is just bitterly sorrowful at the end there.

[rogers-carter]

Rinko Kikuchi as Mako Mori and Charlie Hunnam as Raleigh Becket PACIFIC RIM 2013 | dir. Guillermo Del Toro

[unowensorrow]

Song of the Sea (2014)

An animated movie that's underrated, involving the mythology of selkies with themes of grief, moving on and the importance of expressing emotions.

Its art is hand drawn and has Irish myths involved, there's an Irish song that I'm listening to on repeat. I've watched Secret of Kells from the same studio before and I liked it as a kid. A wonderful story about different reactions to grief. Ben losing his mother, his only knowledge that she's gone the day his sister is born and with his father being neglectful and unresponsive to questions ends up resenting his sister for it. The father, deeply in his grief, ends up neglecting his children's emotional needs, pretty much implied to ignore his son and only mildly doting on his daughter. Their grandmother, well meaning but kind of condescending in thinking that what she's doing is the best that can be done for the children. Soairse, growing up never having known her mother with a father that doesn't really know her and a brother that resents her. There's not a bad guy in this movie, Macha the supposed evil witch, took the emotions of others which turned them into stone from the misconception that it is an inconvenience that hinders people, that pain is best taken away, unfelt. An allegory for how unhealthy bottling emotions are, and how it can also affect others around you.

The journey of brother and sister that ends up with them understanding each other better and finally getting closure from the loss the heart of their family. I love that they had Ben apologize for how he treated his sister all this time, not neglecting the fact that what he did was not okay, and even choosing her at the end. Their father too, learns to finally listen, and works to be a better father. There's certainly magic, but I also liked how family is complicated, even in grief but you love them all the same and hold them. When even Macha finally came back to herself to see that what she was doing was totally wrong, enforcing others to not have emotions is not a good thing. It's a happy ending, a story that's heart touching.

[unowensorrow]

Just saw an Elementary post, and like whoa, I forgot about that. Only watched till episode 7 (I think) but I remember loving this adapted version of Sherlock Holmes too. Somehow the same, but also a different dynamic, Joan (she's a woman in this one, and asian) is not a war surgeon in this one, but still was a surgeon. The cause of the meeting is also different, iirc she was hired by his dad to be his sober companion. He's still the eccentric, thrill of the case chasing maniac and she also gets involved in his shenanigans, finding purpose in helping solve cases. Their budding friendship was precious, I don't actually think they're gonna be romantic in this one (just a feeling) but you can see they're important to each other all the same (developmental stages still but yea).

[unowensorrow]

The actor for Mako Mori (Rinko Kikuchi) plays Mizuki in 47 Ronin, it's a small world after all huh. She was an antagonist, her acting was captivatingly seductive, she's the actress that got my attention in that movie. The movies came out the same year too, that she filmed 47 ronin then went to pacific rim after, working hard lady.

[unowensorrow]

Next up on my rg watching list: either bladerunner (I will watch the prequel too) or the nice guys

I am tempted to watch Pacific Rim 2 tho, even if only to see what's bad about it, best to form an individual opinion after all. My main gripe is Raleigh's absence though it might make sense for his character, I know mako will be in it tho hmm

[unowensorrow]

Changed my mind, just saw some clips like what da hell. Mako, dead. I,,, yeah nope. No no no no no, nope nvrmind. "Your father always wanted you to be a pilot", are we sure that was THE stacker pentecost you're talking about???

Why are they literally sending out teenagers to die, also, were they the only options available? Where are all these drift compatible people coming from? In the first film, it's kinda implied that such a thing can't just be found anywhere, and then there's partnering people that have bad friction in their relationship, are y'all trying to crash the jaegers? Teenagers are also the worst at managing their emotional responses, not a joke. This is a doomsday scenario like part 1, and they showed it back then by how they tracked down even Raleigh Becket in their desperation. The relationships of the pairs in part one also indicate in a sense why they're drift compatible: married, triplets, brothers (rip yancy), and father-son. Raleigh's and mako's fate compatibility wasn't entirely out of nowhere, she did study everything on him, he saw her potential, their similar tragedies and more. Pentecost was rare in his 'i don't bring anything to the drift thing. And even if the relationship has friction, like Chuck's and herc's, it being a father-son relationship is different from literal strangers going from, I don't like this girlie at first but now she kinda swell weewoo we're compatible.

Why, oh why are they dropping these big hazard machines in the middle of cities with people still around? They should be hundred kilometers at least if they don't wanna be accidental pancakes, they would be feeling the vibrations of each step with how close they are, their poor overwhelmed senses. Why are they fighting in the middle of those cities, don't the Kaiju rise from the ocean? The first film had the jaegers specifically try to at least meet or move the battle to where less collateral can occur, or maybe they get to the lands faster than the Jaeger can arrive, but still. There are people in the background working on evacuations, or should be trying to no? The newt was infected thing is kinda crazy ngl, like hive minded? That he is using his access, could they not block his access when they discovered? Could he not have secretly deactivated some defenses from the inside? Also, ten years and suddenly all these jaegers coming out of the woodwork, wasn't it discontinued back then because it was expensive to maintain? How come they are all so new and shining like, yea these bad bois were made yesterday hoo. They're also prancing around the cities like hell, that's a lot of dead collateral, the politicians are probably frothing at the mouth. There's no damage control to be had

I'm obviously missing a lot of context and definitely need to really watch the movie for a deeper understanding, but consider this a pre-rant. Why do I do this to myself? It's because I like mindless raging sometimes and with what I keep hearing about uprising, it seemed to fit the bill. I also have a hobby of watching bad movies sometimes just for the heck of it

Edit: Continuing this, dude why do they keep pausing so much just to pose, constant movement is a must. Why did they just watch the bloody thing transform? There's no such rule about not interrupting someone mid transforming, it's a bloody fight. Shoot. It. Before it becomes worse if you can't hack it. Are we also just conveniently forgetting the corrosive blue blood thing? How the hell newton just cloning the Kaiju organs idk at this point, he was undeniably a Kaiju groupie but he was not that stupid. Shouldn't hermann be affected too in a sense anyways since he also drifted then? Stupid apple logic.

[loulooser]

Can’t wait to not sleep at all on September 11th

[spinostarz]

i know ur from the uk(?) but reading this as an american is really really funny

[loulooser]

why 😭 it’s about twenty one pilots???? Their new album is out sep 12th????

[jarsjam]

THERE'S TWENTY ONE THIS TIME???

[midnightmelinda]

Funny how, as a late comer in this whole “Ryan Gosling might be the best thing that ever happened to Hollywood” business, and currently in my #LaLaLand era, I keep on being asked how much do I love the dream sequence at the end and how I wish it were true…

Um… I don’t love it. At all.

And I wish even less it were true.

Don't get me wrong... It is a stunning piece of cinematography impeccably choreographed and perfectly performed by Ryan and Emma, its direction and music are beyond breathtaking, but damn... I hate what it implies. It hits harder every time I watch the movie (roughly every three days on average).

The dream sequence is nothing but Mia’s ideal life. It follows what the past five years have been for HER. In that version where they end up together… Seb does not exist anymore. He is Mia’s husband, he is the father of their child, he is her number one fan, but he becomes a supporting role in his own life.

It tears me apart every single time I see anyone implying that this was the perfect ending for the both of them.

For Mia ? Undoubtedly.

For Seb ? Not even close.

When Seb playing their song brings us to what could have been their first kiss, Sebastian is then being lead by Mia. In their house, in the studio sequence, to Paris… he instantly loses agency.

Also, his white suit is the same colour as the background when they enter the stage scene. That’s intentional. When he is the most himself (first scene-observatory-engagement party-Seb's) Sebastian’s colours are on the hazel spectrum. The black suit he wears from the moment he starts working with Keith showcases his inner struggle, and his light that is slowly but surely getting dimmed. Everything about Sebastian is different when he joins The Messengers, wearing black (while the rest of the band is fairly colorful) expresses how big a toll it takes on him (plus Ryan is insanely skilled at using micro-facial expressions to characterize his loss of identity, it gets almost physically painful to witness such a passionate character vanishing right before our eyes) (*insert enraged whisper about how Ryan was robbed of the oscar here*).

Seb wearing a black suit is unhappy Seb.

Here, he wears this creamy white suit that makes him disappear in the background while Mia's dress is a shade of their dark blue-ish purple (the nuance they both wear when Mia hears their theme song for the first time) which is very telling of his erasure.

Seb wearing a white suit is transparent Seb.

She gets dragged away from him by the casting director and he automatically catches up.

She successfully auditions while he stays alone in the hallway, entirely consumed by his hopes for her future.

She goes to Paris and he immediately follows with no mention of “getting my own thing going”.

None of these actions are initiated by Seb.

Even in Le Caveau De La Huchette where he plays (notice the dark outfit again) it’s a blink-and-you-are-missing-it situation where he gets quickly overshadowed by the trumpetist.

During the waltz sequence, which may very well be a first dance at their wedding, he once again perfectly blends in the background. The first time they danced in the stars at the observatory, they were equals as one perfect shadow. Now, all eyes are on Mia only. And she is still wearing her “actress” dress. Such a symbol.

The sequence continues to the highlight reel of their lives together, which gets progressively worse for Seb. He’s never seen with his child. He is always in the background, once again, either with the birthday hat or in front of the house. We don’t see him actively being a dad. And jazz is nowhere to be seen, nor are Sebastian’s colours.

When we cut to the evening scene, it gets even sadder.

Mia literally erases her actual husband (uh, there is a pattern, here) and put Seb at his place, like they are interchangeable. He behaves the same way. He wears the same type of outfits as David does. He walks like him. He drives like him. He doesn’t talk much, like him. None of the things that make Seb… Seb are so much as hinted.

In Mia’s dream life, Seb's essence is gone, which is the very reason the argument happened in the first place. Seb struggles to survive when he is not himself. Mia didn’t get the message and projects the exact same thing all over again.

Her dream matters.

His ? Not so much.

Finally, when they get to the club as husband and wife, we reach the epitome of Seb being a ghost in his own life.

Seb doesn’t flinch.

His eyes does not sparkle with excitement and joy.

It is a jazz club, for goodness sakes !

He should behave like a child in a theme park, dying to take part in their music and chat with everyone and marvel at the countless authentic pieces of Jazz history used to decorate the walls and talk endlessly about his heroes and enjoy every second spent in his dream place.

He.

Does.

Not.

He sits with her and he doesn’t even acknowledges the music. SEB. Mister “jazz is so exciting I can barely contain myself”.

He’s physically there but his soul is long, long gone.

This is what broke me. This is what brought tears to my eyes. Not that they don't end up together, but that Mia projects as ideal partner a watered down version of the man whose aura and passion led to her dream coming true.

The dream sequence essentially turns our beloved neurodiverse, autistic-coded musician into the neurotypical version of himself as perceived by Mia and for Mia’s benefit.

[xseiketsu]

I agree, Seb and Mia not ending up together in the end is the best thing that could have happened for Seb, even if it hurt him to leave her. His dream is played off as a joke CONSTANTLY. Oh yeah, his favorite jazz bar was turned into a samba and tapas place isn't that funny? He wants to name his bar Chicken on a Stick isn't that stupid? Who would do something like that? Who would even go to a jazz bar in the first place? Jazz is dying anyways, it has to either be completely modernized for a new audience or it will die out naturally. How stupid of Sebastian to even have this dream in the first place, it would never work, he could never be successful. He's just some guy with an outlandish dream that needs to face reality and get a real job like playing with The Messengers. It doesn't matter how miserable he is, he's supporting Mia and her dreams and that's more important to him than trying to achieve his own dreams. Mia's dreams are achievable, Mia's dreams are romanticized, Mia's dreams are the main plot of the movie, not Seb's. She can be anything she wants if she just tries hard enough and gets her big break and isn't that just so lovely? She's a big star, a success story, someone to admire! And Seb, if he ended up with her, would just be her accessory. He's not allowed to be his own person if he stays with her and that is BLATANTLY obvious in the dream (nightmare) sequence. It's so easy to get lost in the romance of it all just like with the planetarium scene because it's what could have been! They were pushing for this romance the whole movie and what it just fizzles out like that? A quiet break when they could have a big reunion and get back together? I honestly think the dream sequence is a little unnerving and kind of creepy more than it is romantic at this point (sorry Mia)...it's like the equivalent of taking a photo and cutting and pasting someone else's face over top. That's not Seb anymore, that is Seb directly pasted over her husband and he is completely unrecognizable. He lacks passion, he doesn't have his own dreams anymore, he lives to serve her and their family. And maybe that works great for her actual husband, but that's really just not what Seb is meant to be. He has such infectious passion for jazz that just listening to him talk immediately makes me care more about it, even though I have literally never given a second thought to the genre. And how can you possibly bear to strip that away from him? You KNOW that's his biggest passion and his greatest ambition and you want him to settle for being what amounts to a househusband while you live out your dreams of being an actress. I almost wonder if she ever truly loved him because how can you stand to quash the person you love's dreams like that? I mean I know it's just like a "what could've been" but I don't know, the thought of him ending up with her makes me kind of angry...if you couldn't tell already.

Anyways, Seb ending up with Mia would have been a mistake and I'm glad that they didn't go that route, no matter how sweet and romantic it might've seemed for them to have a big reunion like they were setting up for at the end.

[midnightmelinda]

There is a strong argument to be made about this movie not treating its characters the same way. Mia is made to become the one you should root for, poor thing, these auditions are so painful, no one came to see her play, it's so sad, and look, she even get a bad boyfriend who does not show up for her.

Meanwhile, when we meet Seb, he's acting obsessively. It's not painted as a musician seeking to perfect his craft, but as this impatient weirdo who is being a creep sitting in front of the Van Beek. That he got ripped off by said club in some capacity is overlooked, we don't even get the details of what happened and sent back Seb to this small appartment that even Laura says does not look like a home.

And the joke becomes more and more proeminent when he's playing these christmas songs to people who don't give a damn, to a boss that fires him on the spot, and to work colleagues who blatantly don't respect him. The party scene does nothing to alleviate that, including the outfit. He's not taken seriously. He never is.

When they meet on the WB lot, there is SUCH a gap in the way he treats her - immediately put on a pedestal and branded as a child playwright prodigy - and the way she treats him - trying to rile him up thrice in ten minutes. He's exposing his soul to her, there. That this scene became a meme is just... cherry on top of a sour cake (but I'm one day gonna lash out about how Ryan being the most meme-able actor is such a heartbreaking thing because it chips away at his credibility while this man is the freakin best actor ever and fights so very hard for virtually anyone but him, and how wrong it is that people just treat him as a afterthought).

And then come the goddamn Messengers. The contrast between who he is before he enters that damn room, and after is PAINFUL. He's so tensed, he's already lost his colours, and my god does Ryan go above and beyond to characterize his discomfort in the most palpable yet sublte of ways. He takes Keith's abuse (because telling someone that Jazz is dying because of them, and that they're a pain in the ass IS abuse, and makes it very clear why Seb did not wanted to work with him in the first place, but Mia had to make him hear her conversation with her parents and push him towards the "responsible, worthy of appreciation" choice instead of following his dream while she just said she was paying to follow hers) stoically because he wants to fit in a box that has never been made for people like him.

And even there, he's treated as yet another reason not to respect him. The photoshoot tears me apart, Seb is so broken he becomes a litteral joke while he knows he is missing the play. BUT HE TRIES TO DO THE GROWN UP THING FFS. The argument scene drives me insane because what he tells her is the truth. He's going out of his way to come and surprise her for a brief moment, and all she does is making him feel like he's sold his soul and can't show traces of appreciation. She does not work anymore while he does... guess who's making this situation work, financially ? Seb ! It is heavily implied when she quits her job immediately after he signs his contract with Keith. He's in this mess because of her and now she is actively reproaching it to him. She was liking him better when he was on his ass.

And what kills me is how Seb's being made as the villain while he is the one sacrificing everything for her, to make her proud, because, clearly, he's not doing this to open his club - he has no time for that-, he's doing it for her. But he's the bad guy because look, it works, so shut up. You're bothering us with your jazz anyway.

Jazz is what keeps Seb alive. It's the essence of who he is. What makes him him. He's arguably far more passionate than Mia is, and his dream is still treated as negligeable.

AND YET. It works. It more than works, he has created an insanely cool place, where people are happy to work in (just LOOK at the smile on that waitress's face, and on all his musicians), and customers are having a blast, young and old. His dream was far less likely to become true, if we listen to everyone on the first part of the movie, but he made it. And Seb's a success. He was RIGHT from the get-go, and he fought all the odds stacked against him and won. And I HATE that Seb's just become the place they see each other in, and not a celebration of this amazing club. Even there, he's an afterthought. All that matters is how it hurts him to see her, while her face has been painted in GIANT on the wall near where he parks everyyyy night.

Sebastian is only perceived as a plot device, but he is the most tragic, courageous and resilent character, and even then, he fought more for her dreams than for his own. He should be celebrated, not villainized because he missed the play.

Mia does NOT love him the way he deserves to be, and even less the way he loves her. He sacrificed everything for her, while she got pregnant two years - TWO YEARS - after the audition. She was QUICK to throw herself into another relationship with someone that's just as pale and boring as Greg (whom she left without telling him she was gonna fall in love with another man in the following hour, cool cool cool) and that's just there to be a supportive role, a father when she is away, a husband when she is there, and genuinely someone catering to her needs rather than his. I'm sad for David, genuinely. This does not sounds like a very fulfilling life.

I'm THRILLED Seb ends up alone. He deserves so much more.

[unowensorrow]

I only saw La La Land once, almost a decade ago and only because my sister was insistent, and at that age, I didn't care much for romance at that time, honestly kinda tuned out some scenes, but I did find the movie beautiful for its themes of hopes and dreams and trials and tribulations of following such, a double-edged sword. This is Mia's story, so the camera is always drawn to her, but the thing that left the most impact is the argument, Sebastian's truth, that even with her decisively ending their relationship right there and then, he still chose to be kind, picking her up the morning after as he stated.

Would it be bad to say that I was more captivated by Sebastian's singing than Mia's (no offense to Emma stone, just my personal preference)? I wasn't actually that sad they broke up back then, I was more 'this was the best that could've happened to them in their circumstance'. I was technically half my age so my thought process was different. Planning to watch it again though, you have fully convinced me to do so OP, your thought analyses are beautiful and I look forward to seeing more of it.

[midnightmelinda]

Sebastian is a fantastic character, and he is way more layered than Mia is. Plus parts of his story aren't revealed (what happened at the Van Beek ? What happened with Keith to leave him so rattled ?) which automatically makes him someone with a past far denser than Mia's who's just auditionning then working as a waitress then auditionning then working as a waitress... rince and repeat.

Seb is fascinating. Not solely because his dream is far less common than "being a movie star" which is the most generic thing ever, but also because he cares so. Damn. Much.

When she tells him what it is she is dreaming of, he immediately puts her on a pedestals, he highlights what she does, he turns her into a child playwright prodigy just to give her a boost of confidence, he absolutely hypes her up when she gets her callback-though she mocked it an hour earlier-and he never, not once stops believing in her. Her dream becomes his priority, at far too great a cost for him.

And at the end, when he gets the call for the audition, he finds her house because from the very first minute they spent together, he listened so carefully he remembered it all. He's totally devoted to her, that she treats him so poorly twice in a way that's made to make you be mad at him is so... unfair.

The argument is nothing but Seb trying his best to preserve whatever is left of himself. His light is gone, his magic too, he does not get excited and chatty and lively anymore, he's just... dimmed. And instead of listening ans trying to make it better for him, she just shames him for making a choice that he made for her.

Mia is really, really unfair, and selfish. She got pregnant two years after the audition for her daughter to be two when we pick up the story five years later, which says a lot about how she recovered from their break up, while Seb looks arguably far more rattled, and he doesn't have anyone. It's fairly clear that though he is happy in his club, it took him longer to get over her, specially if her private life was broadcast on television or in the medias because she is famous.

This breakup is the best thing that could happened to Seb. But I'm convinced that one day, Mia is gonna wake up, realise her life lacks of Seb's spark and passion, and sorely regret the successful owner of the coolest jazz bar in LA.

Also... I'm far more captivated by Ryan's singing too. Since he's a musician himself, he has a way to play Seb that makes the singing pieces so... poignant. He breaks my heart on the initial version of City Of Stars, on the "another dream that I can not make true" line that's nothing but a tragic foreshadowing to his story with Mia. Ryan is just so good at micro-expressions and his interpretation of Seb is so intelligent and delicate... he turned a beautiful character into one that's unforgettable.

[unowensorrow]

It's a relationship that's more bitter than sweet now that I'm looking at the aftermath closer. With a dynamic that's heavily one-sided, something had to give eventually. It is better that she let go first, with how devoted he was to her, he wouldn't have ever made such a decision first, is what I kinda read on him. He really did wish the best for her in life, even as she it broke his own heart. Also, I can see your vision about Mia having more regrets than Sebastian, his recovery may be slower, but he'll get there. His life in the before (without mia) and the after (the 5yrs and so) would've been interesting to see, the process of how he recovers his passion for jazz.

That he was a musician and had a band was a cool thing to recently discover that I didn't know back then. I've been listening to all the songs he's sung that I can find (I keep finding myself randomly playing I'm Just Ken lol). I never noticed that niche foreshadowing oof. And along his micro-expressions is his body language too, he manages to make each character he plays have their own that compliments them well. His way of talking too, tbh.