Fuck I miss you. It seems like you’re a memory that just keeps playing over and over again. A reminder of a different time, a different place, a different me. Sometime I wish I could forget. Just erase the memories, erase you; however, I know that will never happen.
No matter where I go, or who I become you will always be a part of me. A part that I wish I could escape. A part of you makes me who I am. you will never not have a hold over my life; you’re not even a part of it anymore, and you’re still guiding me. You’re a constant reminder of all the bad parts of me, and also the best.
I can’t think of a day that I don’t think of you. Every day for the past four years you have crossed my mind. You where my first love, my first real heart break, and my best friend. You saved me from myself, and you saved my life. Still to this day you manage to save me.
I wonder where you are, and how you are doing, and even if you think about me, like I think about you. I know you have a girl now, and that you are even expecting your first kid. I guess at the end of the day I just want to make sure you are happy, and doing okay.
I wish I could have a conversation with you. Just you and Me. No one around, no interruptions. Just to catch up, and have that talk that’s been way over due!
A huge part of me believes that it’s not over. That one day somewhere down the road we will run into each other, and start a new chapter. That maybe that day will have our chance. That we could start all over again. That we could have a second chance.
A part of me feels horrible that I still have this notion in my head. Knowing that you are living your life, and that I am living mine. That maybe the ig man upstairs isn’t going to give us, me, a second chance.
You’ve been all I wanted since freshmen year, and you’re still all I want. I am still waiting for you, and A part of me will always be waiting for you. I feel pathetic for even thinking this. But sometimes I think that we where meant to be. Maybe Not together, but at least in each others life.
I guess I still feel this way because you left so abruptly. That the truth wasn’t spoken. That we didn’t get a chance to say goodbye. I never got the closer I needed to really move on with my life. So I hope one day we can sit down and talk about the past. About the short time we shared, how happy we where, how I was. How you broke my heart, that a part of me is still broken. I need you to let me in one last time. To tell me the truth about everything that happen. I need the truth to move one with my life. To open up to someone else. To love and be loved. I need you to help me let you go.
jacobvanloon
2087
tangentwithtanner
areudirty
janainaart
romaincrisis
origamiaround
titsay
