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@urbanwronski
The Hook, the Hercules and the Magical Apple Tree: My Father Home from the Sea
by David Tyler (Urban Wronski) The ship was in for a refit. HMNZS Kaniere, a Loch-class frigate salt-hardened from Korean waters and Pacific patrols, had come back to Devonport dockyard at HMNZS Philomel needing attention, and while the dockyard men did their work, her crew were ashore. Technically, a Petty Officer of the Royal New Zealand Navy drawing his service pay was Crown property. King’s…
A Word From the Commission: A Clarke and Dawe Tribute
This sketch is written in the tradition of John Clarke and Bryan Dawe, whose weekly interviews, first on A Current Affair and then for many years on the ABC’s 7.30, set the standard for Australian political satire. It is offered as homage, not impersonation. John Clarke died in April 2017, walking in the bush he loved. Bryan Dawe continues to work as a writer and performer. Neither has any…
As Featured In: Michael West Media
My piece on the funeral insurance industry’s grief economy — stepped premiums, an 80% cancellation rate, and the Youpla scandal that cost Indigenous families $66m — is out today with Michael West Media, one of the country’s sharpest independent outlets, reaching readers well into the millions. Full piece here: https://michaelwest.com.au/funeral-insurance-deadly-scheme-of-expensive-promises/
In the Land of the Blind
As the world sits agape at the porthole of a sports-washer and SBS raves about the magic of a planet united by football, which Australia must call soccer, it is time to look at the rules of the real game. Imperialism. It’s played for keeps. As recently as 1782, due deference to the crown was enforced by death. But not just any death. Spoiler alert: the following barbarism is so grotesquely…
Reaching Out
On the wellness racket and the lie of “resilience”. A note before we begin. What follows is written in homage to the late John Clarke and his offsider Bryan Dawe, whose weekly interviews, first on A Current Affair, then for years on the ABC’s 7.30, were the finest political satire this country has produced. Clarke never bothered with wigs or impersonation. He’d sit there, entirely himself,…
Mid-Winter Ball
THE INTERVIEW A tribute to Bryan Dawe and the late John Clarke DAWE: Prime Minister, welcome. CLARKE: Good to be here, Bryan. DAWE: Prime Minister, you said repeatedly before the election that youwould not touch negative gearing or capital gains tax. How would youdescribe those statements now? CLARKE: Weren’t the Socceroos fabulous against Paraguay? DAWE: Prime Minister, it was a nil-all…
Anthony Norman Albanese crossed Parramatta Road the way other people cross a street: with the calm…
Sons of Toil, Part I: The Toolmaker's Bequest
A political obituary for Sir Keir Starmer, 2020 to 2026: the man who climbed out of the working class and then, with the impeccable timing that only the truly committed can achieve, pulled the ladder up behind him. Glossary of Terms (for the reader who wishes to follow proceedings) AUTHENTOCRACY, n. The system by which a politician’s origins are cited as evidence of his convictions, the…
Catch 22
New Bedlam Joseph Heller’s Catch-22 was the trap no rational mind could escape: merely reaching for an off-ramp was proof you had to stay. The clause specified that fear of dying in combat was the mark of a rational mind. Captain John Yossarian, Heller’s bombardier, whose entire war aim was to stay alive, proved by asking to be grounded that he was sane; and a sane man had to fly. Heller was on…
Donald John “Two-Weeks” Trump: The Work-Experience Boy from Hell
The government of one who pretends to make deals There is a particular kind of man you meet in every pub in Australia. He’s never a stranger, always a mate of a mate. “I’m a bit short this week”, he says, leaning in with the easy warmth of a lifelong friend. Be alright on payday. Could you spot us fifty? And because you are reasonable, and the connection seems real, and it is only fifty, you…
The Invisible Press, Part 2
Part 2, The Harrow Part 1 of this series — “The Great Digital Enclosure” — examined how Google’s AI is strip-mining the economic foundations of independent journalism. This piece examines what the state has been doing in the meantime. “I am an invisible man.” Ralph Ellison begins his masterpiece with a declaration that has never lost its charge or its dark, grievous wit. Not a ghost. Not a…
The Great Digital Enclosure: How Google is Stealing the Future of Independent Journalism
Picture the scene. You’ve spent three days researching, writing, editing and polishing a piece on, say, Australia’s housing crisis, or the slow-motion collapse of the NDIS, or whatever fresh new hell or train-wreck of a dumpster fire in a nuclear power plant the week has served up. But of course that would be if you don’t count issues you have spent your adult life discussing, arguing, living and…
The Lie of the Land
Calling out the fibs, the spin, the flimflam, the bullshit and the full catastrophe No. 1 — Friday, 22 May 2026 WELCOME TO THE AVALANCHE Picture a man in a bathroom. Not just any man, but the modern father of lies. Snapping cigarettes. It is 1932, in an Upper East Side apartment in New York City, with eleven-foot ceilings, formal dining rooms, and servants’ corridors running behind the walls…
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The Art of the No Deal
Picture the scene at the Great Hall of the People on a chilly morning in May, frost winking in wan sunshine through the tall windows and in the chill of the vestibule where the two delegations assemble. As always, taking care of business trumps any show of diplomacy. Texting in public is, of course, another compulsive tic now; in a dopamine economy, distraction rules. Between the two crushes of…
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The Monster They Made (Part 2)
What grew in the space where Iran’s democracy used to stand. There is nothing new in the world except the history you do not know. — Harry Truman The democrat the US and the UK’s spooks destroyed was not a firebrand. Mohammad Mosaddegh — tall, pallid, sad-eyed, prominent-nosed, shoulders permanently in retreat from the world, looked less like a revolutionary than a scholar who had mislaid his…
The Monster They Made (Part 1)
Made in Langley: How the United States paved the way for the Iranian theocracy it is now bombing. Mohammad Mosaddegh was not some fire-breathing radical. He was a 71-year-old lawyer, Iranian nationalist, democrat, and constitutionalist who wore a camel-hair coat and wept in parliament. His crime? He had the temerity to suggest that Iranian oil should belong to Iran. What was he smoking? Imagine…
The Budget That Will Not Save You
In which Jim Chalmers breaks several promises and the planet simultaneously Many years later, as he faced the press gallery, “Lucky” Jim Chalmers would remember that distant afternoon when his father first explained to him what a promise was. It was a simple idea. You said a thing. You did the thing. The two events were connected, like a door and its frame, like a tax and its revenue, like a…