I tag all my posts with manga spoilers as "one piece manga spoilers" and block people who post untagged manga spoilers. Any anime spoilers will be tagged with the arc. ex: "whole cake spoilers"
He’s been caught he’s been caught. You know what it is, you know why it happens, you could even find out who it’s caused by. He stands up straight and, like a coward, he runs. Through the ship, past rooms, all the way into his and locking the door. What does he do? He doesn’t want to get the surgery, he doesn't want to lose you, he doesn’t want to live his life if he has to die with his memories so altered; so without you. You care about him too much that you might tell the others.
“Even if it was, I wouldn’t worry about it.”
Though it’s possible you don’t care as much as he thought you did. You never looked when he took other people, even giving him congratulations or smiling. You don’t love him, you don’t care if he coughs up blood, you may not even tell the others about the disease because of your lack of care.
He hears a knock at the door.
“Captain? Shanks?” The redhead freezes from your voice. How embarrassing for him that you saw him run like a coward when he’s this aged, no wonder you don’t care. “I–I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. I actually do care if you cough up blood and it isn’t pleasant for me to cough up blood either. I didn’t want to stress you out and—I wanted to know how bad you were doing.”
“You don’t have to make up reasons to cheer me up, I just didn’t want you to see the gore. Real gross to see me hacking up a flower.”
…
“It was worrying, but I.. have it too.” Shanks’s heart drops.
“What?”
“I have Hanahaki disease too.” You don’t want him to be alone in this.
“You need the surgery. Does Hongo know?” This is what gets him to open the door. Worry for you.
“I’m not having it, and Hongo knows.”
“What do you mean you’re ‘not having it’ you’re gonna die without it-”
“What about you? You don’t look like you want it, you’re not even getting meds from our doctor like I am.” You feel bad for fussing but if you can guilt him into getting it, lose memories of him in exchange for his life, then you’ll get it. There’s no point in keeping his memory if he dies when you have the opportunity to do something.
“I can’t. I need to-”
“What about after?”
“...I.. still..” Even after all of this he’s still not convinced.
“Who is it?” For a moment you have hope it could be you, but it’s shut down like many times before.
“They’ve died already.” It isn’t you. It’s another person that he’s so adamant about. “I don’t want to forget them when they have no more chances to leave their mark.” ‘I can’t tell him. It isn’t me. He would’ve told me if it was me.’
“You can write it down! I just, you can’t- I don’t want you to die like this!” There’s a head shake in response.
‘It hurts hearing him say this with another person in his heart.’ “You know it isn’t the same, (Y/n).”
“Captain!” He shuts the door on you. “Shanks!”
‘I can hold it, I accepted the chance of death long ago.’
______________
Like Shanks had expected, you told Hongo. You know by now that Hongo has the medicine to prolong Shanks’s life, and keeping the option open might help the captain choose the surgery. Only the doctor knows, though. The crew would be in disarray if they found out he was going to die, choosing to die; along with enemies finding his eventual death a chance. They could go after him for his weakness, or prepare for him to die so as soon as he does they can raid his allies. It’s the reason why Roger had kept his wife and child secret instead of bringing them, an imminent death only means trouble for anyone close to people like him; and now like Shanks. He has to take the medicine anyway, knowing you have someone that’s not him that you would die painfully for rather than just forget them is making him worse quicker than he hoped; even if still much longer than usual. How could he ever convince you to have the surgery when he’s refusing the same as you. Though the idea that you would have it in exchange for him having it is… tempting.
“I would be able to do your surgery even if it progressed after years, I have the skill and could gain more information by that time.” The doctor once again tries to convince his captain while refilling the prescription.
“You could also do the surgery on (Y/n) quick enough it would be like nothing happened.” There’s a dark part of him that wants you to get the surgery so that your memories of this person you love is gone. ‘As if that would give me a chance, or the right to one.’
“They’re grown the same as you, I can’t force the surgery; not mentioning the success rate dropping from a nonconsensual surgery.” The more the person accepts a flower removal the less difficult it will be, as the plant is based on emotion. Gripping onto the memories, it grips harder into your body; let them go and it’ll loosen. The redhead sighs.
“I want them to live more than anything. Memories of someone who doesn’t love (Y/n) while being alive to do so isn’t worth keeping.” His statement causes the doctor to stare at the redhead with shock. Shanks would want someone he cares about to live but he wouldn’t go this far, especially when the Emperor’s captain had chosen something similar. “I mean—well he’s needed on the crew, right?” Hongo is still suspicious, and a little disappointed in his captain for being so aggressive, but chooses not to answer; instead going back to his work.
Once he’s done with the medicine, Shanks leaves quickly.
‘I can’t be saying that. Nothing like that.’ How terrible to say something so selfish outloud, much more to a crewmate who was making a good point. It makes much more sense for Shanks to have it considering he has much more responsibility, yet he has the audacity to insult your choice.
While he’s lamenting, the doctor thinks something else.
‘I need to tell Beckman about this, he’s known Captain for longer.’ Patient confidentiality doesn’t fully matter in this.
(Your POV)
It isn’t you. It isn’t you and it’s someone he loves enough that he’s willing to do something as drastic as die for just the memory of them, despite how many things he’s abandoned for the greater good. It isn’t even 100% sure that he could make it for years, he’s going to get sicker and sicker with time, and you like him! The third reason may not matter as the others but you still love him. To the point there’s enough envy for you to want to forget that dead person just so he doesn’t love someone else. How horrible of you when you’re supposed to be his crewmate and close friend. You should be comforting him but instead you’re here insulting the apparent love of his life that died too soon.
“You’re coughing an awful lot, (Y/n).” Beckman suddenly mentions as you write which supplies to stock once docked. “Doesn’t seem like it’s getting any better, even with the medicine Hongo’s been giving you.”
“..It just takes a while to really work. That’s all.” He taps his pen on the clipboard while you rummage around.
“Hm. Crazy how our captain seems to be the same, that he showed symptoms after you, and how you avoided him for quite a while afterwards. You went through a period of stopping the avoidance but this morning you offered your help instead of talking with him. A strange pattern, isn’t it? For two who supposedly have a contagious illness they gave each other to not be together, or the way our doctor only gives you medicine without bothering to quarantine nor give you a mask to wear.” He’s observant. “The medicine doesn’t look or smell like the type Hongo’s given before to lessen contagions, nor do the components used make much sense for the wanted effect. Why do you even bother hiding your handkerchief if the discharge isn’t contagious, anyway?” Too observant! Did he sneak into the medical office to check the medicine!? “Just some things I want to point out. Of course someone is entitled to their privacy, so you don’t have to show signs of guilt or shock or anything.” He pats you on the back. “Don’t even bother answering. Just keep being as flowery and optimistic about this illness as usual.” You’re cooked.
_______
(Hongo’s POV)
Hongo needs to talk to Beckman while the others are docked but he hasn’t seen the man anywhere. At this point he’ll just go back to his office and study this horrible disease killing two of his friends, hoping some sort of revelation will come. He opens the door and turns on the light.
“You’re pretty stressed about a simple illness, hm Doctor?” Jumpscare. “Even looks like one of your books has been opened again and again, you’ll sweat the color off of the page completely at this point. Some pretty flowers on it, too.” Maybe he didn’t even have to tell him. Hongo sighs.
“When’d you figure it out?”
“I wasn’t quite sure until recently, but a strong reaction to the word ‘flowery’ is pretty telling.”
“Who’s reaction?” He closes the book grimly, not seeing the cogs in the first mate’s head quickly click.
“Don’t tell me that idiot has it too.”
“So it was (Y/n) who gave it away.” Hongo looks so.. tired.
“I suspected he had it too but I wasn’t as sure, he’s got too much experience hiding things.” Beckman rubs the bridge of his nose. “Or maybe I was just hoping he didn’t.”
“This makes it easier, I need your opinion since one of them might like the other.”
“(Y/n) already gave it away.”
“..?” Hongo turns to his crewmate and Beckman stares at him.
…
The first mate turns around and almost storms out of the room.
“At least explain it to me first!” He manages to pull Benn back.
“He told me he was done with his crush and he developed a sickness because of it. Why would I bother waiting?” Hongo continues to pull until the first mate pauses. “Shanks showed signs of favor towards (Y/n) for a while, eventually getting strong enough for me to point it out, but he told me he was getting over it.” Just like Beckman has been with Shanks for a long time, Shanks has also gotten used to the way Beckman analyzes things. The blonde sighs again.
“It turned out for the better in the end.” A huge weight feels like it’s been lifted off his shoulders, he might even float at this rate.
“It would be better if neither of them loved each other.”
“Well we’re past that point.”
“We need to tell the both of them before they end up causing too much damage to their bodies. Gods know how bad his has gotten by this time.” Despite the insults, he cares for Shanks too much. Every minute the redhead spends in pain is agonizing. He’s already failed to prevent pain too many times.
“It’ll be better for me to prepare first, the flower doesn’t come out easily even once dead.” That finally stops the first mate completely.
“Alright.”
_________________
(Your POV)
Of course both Hongo AND Beckman want to talk to you. You can’t believe you were so easily read, even if it’s Beckman. You step into the medical office.
Shanks is there.
The door locks behind you.
no.
“Don’t bother trying to break it down, by the way, I asked Lucky to block it.” The first mate is trusted enough to get his orders followed if it’s serious… and has to do with their less-than-careful-about-his-wellbeing captain. Said captain panics, looking between you and them.
“You probably both know why you’re here.” Hongo gives an apologetic expression, but then a determined one. “I’ll have you say it first, Captain.”
“Say what first?” You ask and the redhead begins to sweat. “Did you lie about how much time you have!?”
“Uh- Well-”
“Captain.” Beckman states.
“You see-”
“Shanks.” He talks firmer, as if the Captain has to admit it first or this won’t work. Like he’d still end up hiding it if you confessed. That kind of hurts.
“Beckmannnn.” Shanks resorts to puppy eyes on his first mate. “Benny?” The sparkles are bounced off of his dark aura.
“Shanks. If you don’t say it, I will, and I will do it in much more detail.” Your captain freezes with despair and you awkwardly shift around. At this point the flower is going to progress faster from your love’s confession of lying, much more if it turned out to be for his love’s sake.
“(Y/n).” You go back to attention at his voice. “I.. so..” He lets out an awkward chuckle. “So erm.. I lied about who it is.”
“Who is it?” You’re getting depressed.
“I need to say this with you aware that there’s absolutely no obligation for you. This is my own problem.”
“I–okay.” He gives one last attempt to convince the first mate with panic eyes but the dark aura grabs the droplets and crushes them. Shanks looks back at you. He’s trapped. He doubts he could even pretend to collapse.
“It’s.. you.”
“My fault?” You misunderstand.
“You! It’s you! I’m in lov- I like you.” He blurts out. “And it isn’t your fault in the least, alright? I failed as your friend and captain that…” Words trail off in your mind.
It’s you.
You’re the one he’s in love with so much he’s so sick with the Hanahaki disease.
You should feel so much guilt but you’re starting to get really happy and-
Stab
Swirl
Shiver
Something inside of you is squirming, drying, losing vitality, spontaneously drying out and curling inside of you with the pressure it’s been putting onto your body suddenly being relieved in a painful way.
“Hongo!” Beckman yells and the doctor grabs what’s needed.
This would be easier if you didn’t let it progress so much, the flower doesn’t necessarily want to do this, but the way the nutrients flood out and the sharp pain from the stem and roots curling up and cutting into the honeycomb of your organs is harming you. Pierced tissue is unplugged and spontaneously healed, developed blooming buds cut you with their previously soft petals with every breath. Drying out and cutting, healing and making more lacerations as it dies.
“We need to pull it out before it cracks into multiple pieces!” Your mouth is forced open by an instrument and forceps forced into your throat; at the very least the serum keeping your throat open is still there. If this flower isn’t pulled out in time, along with the smaller branches, it’ll break into pieces and you’ll need open surgery anyway.
The metal grabs onto the flower stem and starts to pull, slowly and surely, it hurts but the expertise of the doctor keeps it steady and away from breaking apart. Your eyes glance onto the big flower coming out of you, one by one the petals are curling and drying, the stem and vine has lost its brighter green. Your eyes trail to the side to see Shanks pale and worried, but held by the first mate.
Finally the last of it comes out, and the rest of the little buds are pulled out with a few hacks shaking them out enough to be extracted. The blood is gently sucked out while your lungs heal. It feels both weird and nice the way the plant just injected the nutrients back into you. It would be even nicer if it just came out fully its own, though. Well, yours would eventually, but it’d take a lot more time and pain.
The instrument is gently pulled out and you cough a little more before calming down. Your breath is rough. You look at Shanks.
“I.. love you.. too.”
“That’s what happens when the love is reciprocated!?” The redhead shouts. “W-Wait you love me too.” His eyes sparkle, then darken. “You shouldn’t.” He was going to explain more but plants don’t have the concept of patience.
He clutches his chest, breathing roughly. Hongo starts the same as he did to you but pauses.
“It’s.. so much more developed. It won’t come out without a risk of breaking.” Shanks starts to choke. It’s trying to force itself out now, likely because there isn’t enough space inside of his lungs. “I can wait for it to shrink, but-” Shanks twitches. “-the other flowers are interfering. They shrink first.” He’s choking and using armament haki doesn’t work for open wounds; especially when it’s weak from his constant usage. You pull the tool out.
“I love you.” You state, then put your lips onto his. Shanks’s eyes widen, his cheeks flushing a bit. Before the others can point out this really isn’t the time, you act.
Ssuuucckkkkkk
You’re inhaling. If the main flower is still soft enough then you could suck it out. That way the pressure won’t be put on individual petals that would just rip off while leaving their large base intact. Hongo decides not to mention he has an instrument for that he was about to use.
Suuuuuucckkkkkkkk
You continue, taking breaths in the middle until-
-it pops out.
Shanks heaves from the new breath of air.
“I can take it from here..” Hongo gently pushes you to the side before putting the tool back in. “This is going to hurt, Captain.” He gently plucks petals from the bloom, they curl and have no space to go so they cut into the captain’s gums with each tug. This is time limited, short breaths to not inhale the petals again will eventually make him pass out. The flower is squeezed, gently, carefully, this needs to not trigger a chain reaction. It’s finally small enough to leave his mouth, the dried bloom tugged out, then it’s time to navigate. Swirls, shapes, dried out in place that needs to be carefully pulled out in different movements until the main is out.
He lets the remaining flowers come off on their own, he had to unfortunately. It took time to remove the bloomed buds but they’re finally out. All fully developed and the main one several times larger than the opening of both his throat and mouth. His mouth is completely cut both inside and out, even the sides are swollen and one of his lips is lacerated. His jaw dislocated slightly.
The tool is finally pulled out and Shanks’s jaw is put back into place, lips sanitized and treated, everything bandaged and compressed perfectly via the expertise of an unrealistically skilled doctor and due to Shanks’s unrealistically strong flesh. Still, the complete bottom of his face is basically mummy bandaged, his jaw held in place by more. He looks a bit silly but that doesn’t matter right now.
“You didn’t have enough haki to protect yourself all the way. Were you using it this entire time? Was this your method of stalling your death? You need that during battle!” You yell and he looks away. Hongo looks over the extracted flowers.
“They’re incredibly large, and very developed. Captain, how long were you holding this in?” They grow stronger from 3 reasons. Time, amount of love, and how unrequited the love is. How much you think the love is unrequited, anyway.
“it just made more sense for you not to love me.” He manages to speak very carefully. You sit next to him and gently hug him. Beckman drags Hongo out of the office to give you two alone time, you can yell if something goes wrong. “it’s a bad idea, (y/n). you’re going to regret this.”
“I wish I could kiss you right now.” You settle with smooching over his bandages. He blushes a little.
“you’re going to fall out of love eventually." Kiss. “i have too many reasons for you to leave.” Kiss. “i’m bad for you.” Kiss. “stop.” He’s getting redder. “i’m trying to be serious..” Kiss.
“I love you a lot, okay? I’m going to learn more about you and I’m going to keep loving you. If I learn anything stressful, or anything worrying, I’m not going to leave, I'm going to stay with you and help you through it. Do you know how many times my heart broke seeing you go home with someone? How many times I wished that you would suddenly come to me and say you never wanted to be with anyone else other than me? Half of the development of my flower was from me thinking that you loved someone else! I was even thinking stuff like hoping you got the surgery so I could have a chance with you! Isn’t that horrible of me?”
“i was thinking the same thing.” Kiss. “okay.” He “kisses” you this time. You can tell he’s still unsure but he has hope. He accepts it.
He coughs.
“Hongo!?” The doctor comes back and removes the bandage. The captain coughs out a good amount of thorns.
“I shouldn’t be surprised you were still having doubts.” The doctor mumbles. If the person itself doesn’t accept it there will be a few thorns left. The bandages are put back on.
“sorry.” You both end up turning and kissing each other.
No one actually says how the flower gets out, and i always figured if it was big enough it wouldn’t be able to be just be absored or anything so I came up with having to pull it out. Congratulations it’s a beautiful withered flower 👶🌸
So derlord knows this is an ask blog? Doesnt he know that we care? ;u; infinite knowledge of the viewer's infinite love? Oh i guess this is to derlord specifically. Don't YOU know that WE care?
So derlord knows this is an ask blog? Doesnt he know that we care? ;u; infinite knowledge of the viewer's infinite love? Oh i guess this is to derlord specifically. Don't YOU know that WE care?
shucks idk if the batch closed right when i sent the mind reading request (╥﹏╥) sorry if it did, i thought the 5th one wasn’t taken yet!
Not lying the zoro and law one was posted like slightly before yours. Also i just added it anyway. The only difference is the storyline and that im gonna add two versions for male and female similar to what I did for "Surprise!"
Hi! If you’re taking requests, maybe law x reader x zoro angst to smut sort of if you’re comfortable? I was thinking maybe a love triangle with lots of tension and yearning between the characters. And no pressure to write if this is too vague or generic! Thank you so much for everything that you do and write, u make me laugh always :3,<3
Can you say if you want fem or male or gn? I do all so theres no default./nm
Wow i havemt gotten a single request yet, thats kind of embarrassing. Last time i made a post about requests i got like 3 immediately what happened? Did i make myself too unnaproachable by making it look fancy- i thought it was cool. Actually maybe its because ive just been writing shanks for so long, kind of countintutive since i opened requests specifically for motivation to write other characters ;; Ill just post this in the x reader thing too, guys im friendly. feed me
3. Marco x loving bottom Male Reader (fluffy smut)
4. Closed
5. Law x reader x zoro love triangle angst -> smut fem reader
6. Characters read the mind of a perverted best friend reader. Fem and Male reader seperate. (this was sent too late but I actually had this in mind anyway as a wip so i just added it)
Rules/what i do/what i wont do/prompts
Second batch of requests will be open at 5:30am PDT
The crew celebrates another enemy pirate ship plundered by partying at the island bar, a common occurrence. Beckman is surrounded by women, which you expected. He’s popular. Another thing you expected is the people surrounding your redheaded captain, Shanks. This is also a common occurrence despite the both of them handling this popularity differently. For Beckman, he’s a lady lover, popularity really used to its full advantage; while Shanks is more mellow. If he’s pent up he’ll go back with someone, if he isn’t then he doesn't; unlike the first mate who goes home with a girl almost every stop. It saves your heart, it saves your mind, but when it does happen it’s only that much more painful. As if for each time he doesn’t go home with someone he’ll suddenly change and say he’s in love with you instead. That has never happened. He goes home with someone and that hope is squashed, again and again.
“Did you really do that?” Someone asks your captain, leaning on him. You notice he hasn’t created distance like he does when not interested knowing the other is.
“Ah c’mon it’s not that impressive. You’re acting like I split the seas!”
‘You’re splitting my heart in half.’ Bitterness and pain seeing the person you’re in love with so close to another. A tickle, a weird feeling, from your heart to your lungs and up your throat until you cough.
Something feels stuck.
You cough more and more until you look up to see your captain looking directly at you.
“You okay there, (Y/n)?” The way he worries, how could you ever blame him for not loving you?
“I inhaled saliva, woops.”
“It’s not supposed to go down that pipe, don’t know if you knew that.” He teases you before going back to the person at his side. A thought crosses your mind that you should’ve exaggerated so he’d worry about you more, ignoring that flirty piece at his side for you.
Your throat tickles again but before you can cough the redhead stands up with his selected person, winking at you on the way out. You smile back at him. It hurts.
A while after he leaves you yawn, something is making you more tired than usual; perhaps what happened affected you more than usual.
“I’m gonna head back to the ship.” A few crewmates boo at you. “What? I worked hard when we fought, I can’t sleep a little?” They boo more but you stand up anyway,
Boooooo
it fades as you walk back to the ship. What’s wrong with you? You’ve been feeling this tickle in your lungs and throat every so often but this is the first time you’ve actually coughed that hard. Something feels too off, blocked.
Once you’re back in the ship you go to Hongo's office for some cough drops like you have before everytime you get annoyed by the coughing but the moment you open them a throb of pain aches in your lungs.
You need to cough, now.
Your body leans over as you clutch your chest, your throat spasms as you cough. Coughing, coughing, coughing so much it hurts. Your lungs feel like they’re gonna collapse with each one but you can’t stop it. It hurts, it hurts, you can’t breathe properly. Finally, something comes out.
…A petal?
That’s all it was? Why would this be so hard to get out? It felt like there was way more to-
COUGH
You hack up bunches of the petals into your hand as they make way up your throat, something opening it up and forcing a poison into you that keeps your throat open and vulnerable. Even when it finally stops, your esophagus is still wide open. You can’t close it properly.
Like a pathway, a tunnel.
You rub your chest, trying more to close it but unable to. The fuck is wrong with you? At this point the cough drops aren’t going to do anything. Actually you’re likely past that point the moment the petal came out. An object is stuck inside your lungs. You can’t even breathe properly.
___________________
“It’s Hanahaki disease.” Hongo states after checking your throat despite being hungover from yesterday. Not that it matters anymore, everything feels small to him now that he’s figured out what’s happening to his crewmate.
“What?” A stressed doctor is about the worst sign you can get after a check-up.
“A fatal disease that infects when you have an unrequited love. The only way to get rid of it is for the love to be requited or have surgery to remove the flower itself. The side effect of forceful removal..” The doctor is hesitating to tell you. “The side effect is you lose all memory of the person you had unrequited love for.” Horrible news fitting that sign.
“...What?” There’s no way. “What do you mean by ‘lose all memory’. What if I have tons of memories of that person, it can’t just all disappear!” Hongo shakes his head grimly. “Hongo! That’s impossible! Tell me it’s impossible, right!?”
“If there's too many memories with the person you love then the ones remaining will be altered to remove them.” Shanks is your captain, your love, that can’t be. “Even if the altering is so severe that you turn into a different person with a completely different past. I don’t want to tell you this but-”
“That’s what’d happen.”
“That’s what I was afraid of. If worst comes to worst you could even forget you’re a pirate and make up a backstory you’ve lived an entirely different life.” Hongo cleans his medical tools away despite shaky hands. “It’s the only way you’d live unless your love is requited, the disease is too rare for it to be studied properly and can happen anywhere in the world so it can’t be tracked either. I only know of it because of my curiosity. The most I can do is monitor while giving medicine that can slow the progress down.” Once his tools are put away he sits back down, putting his hands on his lap. “You’re an adult. I can’t make this choice for you.”
“It can’t happen. The love won’t be requited. I’ve seen them ignore it over and over.” The doctor clenches his jaw.
“Then try again, seduce them, court them, anything. You’ll die otherwise if you’re going to refuse the surgery.” You lean back on the bed against the wall.
“It won’t work.” If you try it’ll be obvious who you’re in love with, you can’t put that kind of pressure on someone you vowed your loyalty to; especially when he’s sacrificial enough to give himself away to save you. You can’t do that to him. Even if only the others find out then you’d be putting the pressure on them if they should tell the captain, to give up on his happiness and sanity for a forced relationship, or your life. There’s no telling if a forced one would work in the first place. Hongo looks like he wants to argue but decides against it.
“I’m going to make your medicine today, come back for it early tomorrow to take before you eat.” You nod and leave. Everything feels fuzzy, distant, like you’re not in your body even when you move. A pilot controlling a body instead of the body itself. Disassociated from reality.
Is.. this it?
You always felt like you were dying every time you saw your love leave with someone, every time you realized that he isn’t going to return your feelings, but now you’re actually dying. Not by a strong enemy or the grand line weather or even possibly old age, but killed by your own unrequited feelings; and the only way to stop it would just be to kill yourself in another way. Is the you without memories even you? Is it selfish to not want to have the surgery even if it would give Shanks a bit more peace that you’re alive, just because you don’t want to lose him. Not yourself, not memories of your crew, not the timeline of your past that would be altered, but him. You don’t want to lose him.
Cough
You are now on limited time to come to terms with your mortality. The seeds of longing planted in the pockets of your lungs and the way they grow from buds to roots that will sap your life away til you breathe your last won’t wait for you. Not anymore.
____________________
The more you see Shanks the worse you feel, a mix of guilt and despair that you’ll die simply because he’ll never love you. It hurts you to not see him, you want to be near him more now that you’re to die, but it’s only fertilizer for what’s inside you; they’ve started being noticeably bloody and you’re getting pale.
“(Y/n)!” The love blooming inside of you at his voice has you holding in a cough to swallow a petal. You turn and see the cause. “You haven’t looked too good lately, you feeling alright?” He knows that you’re avoiding him, you can tell, he’s choosing not to mention it.
“I’ve just been feeling bad, I don’t want to worry you.” A more censored version of the truth since you don’t want him to think you hate him before you die.
“You don’t have to worry about my mental state when you’re sick, you’re my friend along with being on this crew.” He grins.
Stab
A root pierces through the sponge of your alveoli.
“Thank you.” He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly but visibly looks better now that he knows you aren’t mad at him. For a moment he’s about to say something before he coughs. You pat his back quickly but he waves you off.
“Saliva went down the wrong pipe.” He says, shuffling with something in his pocket. A handkerchief, he coughs into it then puts it away quickly.
“Should I get you water?”
“I already got it out. Besides, I’m talking with you right now. If I’m not a doctor like Hongo I might as well cheer you up, right?” He smiles happily.
The two of you talk before you excuse yourself. Once you’re gone the smile on Shanks’s face fades, he reaches for the handkerchief. Inside it is a blotch of blood covered petals.
“Dammit.”
_____________
Shanks fans his face after having taken cold medicine from Hongo. He lied and avoided a proper check up, giving fake symptoms so that the doctor wouldn’t be suspicious of his coughing and weakness. It hurts, but he can handle this. It’s not like he can afford to die now, of course he’s gonna survive. Maybe a year or two, sounds good. Covering his lungs in armament haki when he feels it start to grow is draining him when the flower already is, but it’s slowing down the progress.
“You caught a cold?” You ask the captain, worried.
‘He’s sick too, perfect excuse.’ “Yeah, guess I caught what you got. We’ll both be sick for a while.” He’s really got to figure out how to look normal for 2 years. You make a face at him, he doesn’t know that your illness is Hanahaki.. but neither do you know his is as well. You end up chalking it up to a random illness he’s gotten at an island but you’ll need to check in on Hongo to convince him to give a proper check. The doctor has been overwhelmed with your condition but you don’t want that to stop help to the redhead.
“Maybe. Just take the medicine, I’m taking some from Hongo too. It can be specialized if he checks on you more.” Your captain almost flinches but brushes it off again.
“A cold is a cold, I’m not weak enough to need some specialized medicine.”
“I am?”
“Not.. what I meant.” You backed him into a corner. You really want him to be healthy. Dying with the worry of him being sick would be horrible. “If I get bad enough I’ll go to him. Promise.” The redhead has a feeling he won’t be able to hide it for the rest of his life, but he could pass it off as a chronic illness so that he isn’t known as the man who died from heartbreak; and from being in love with one of his subordinates, no less. You’ll all be painted as the crew that had to lose their captain because of that, because of you. What if they blame you? He doesn’t want that. He’d rather you cry a little, mourn with the crew, then party and move on by falling in love with someone else that isn’t your aging broken captain.
Shanks pulls out his handkerchief and coughs into it again, putting it back quick enough for you to not see the blood or petals.
“I worry about you.” You say softly and his heart stings.
“I know.”
_________________________________
You’re getting worse. You don’t have the level of skill and strength as your captain to protect yourself as he is, nor the same exact obligation as the captain does for motivation; there’s mostly acceptance you’ll be on this crew, watch him, and die. It’ll hurt him to watch you die and you know that he’d rather you live and forget him but you can’t. You’re selfish. You want to keep him in your mind even if it causes his own detriment. The only thing worrying you at the moment is his sickness. Shanks has gotten sick before, bacteria and viruses don’t typically care about your conqueror or armament haki, but he’s still got an overall healthy body; despite all of the drinking. Him walking around instead of causing a big fuss about it is a huge red flag as well, most of the time he says everything is okay with him is when things are either absolutely insignificant or the most not okay he could ever be depending on how much he acts fine.
A kinda bad papercut?
“I’m dyinnggg I’m gonna die. We’ll need to amputate my only remaining arm. Maybe even a leg.”
Stabbed in the chest?
“Don’t overreact so much~ This’ll barely be noticeable when it heals. Hardly even needed the surgery.”
You’re trying to figure out which one it is right now. It’s harder to tell considering it also depends on how emotional people around him get about it as well.. at this point you’d have better luck pretending it doesn’t matter at all to you to get him to show any signs.
Yeah, you’ll use that tactic.
________________
You hang out with Shanks, he coughs a few times into his handkerchief; it’s worrying you but you have to hold it in.
“I’ve been coughing too, kind of annoying when you’re trying to talk.” He looks at you for a moment as if to analyze if you’re stressed, then huffs.
“Oh absolutely.” You’re in. “Getting a cough while talking freezes my train of thought.” Good, he’s actually complaining. “It’s been taking everything in my body to not stutter, the men would mimic me to the bottom of the sea.”
“I personally don’t stutter even if I cough.”
“Caught your voice cracking once.” He chuckles, then leans back casually. “I’ve just got it way worse than youuu~”
“You’re such a baby.”
“No making fun of the Captain.” He jokingly orders before coughing again. Okay, here’s your big gamble.
“I don’t really worry about it, even some blood is fairly normal if you’re coughing a lot.” There’s a pause, then he looks at you in a way like he’s actually a little hurt.
“Have you been coughing up blood?” Still worrying over you first.
“Kinda, are you?”
Badump
Badump
Badump
“A.. bit.” He mumbles. You got him to give something away! Not that you’re happy that you were right. “Do you really not think it’s a big deal?”
‘Uh oh, now I made him insecure.’ “Well–uh, it’s not like I like you coughing up blood, nor do I like coughing up blood. At least we’re suffering together, right?” You scoot closer to him. He still seems troubled but smiles a bit. You suddenly get a huge urge to cough and hack into your own cloth, checking it quickly for petals before putting it away to hide the red.
“Was that the blood?” Urgh. You pull out the cloth and show it to him, it’s more blood than you expected. He grabs onto the cloth with wide eyes. “This—isn’t a normal amount of blood.”
“I’ve got plenty of it already.” You shrug and he looks almost angry at you.
“No this isn’t-“
“You’re coughing up blood too.” That makes him stop, speaking quieter after a moment.
“It isn’t as bad as this.” It’s going to hurt you to say this.
“Even if it was, I wouldn't worry about it.” You clench your fist afterwards. Shanks stares at you, then looks away.
“Yeah. I’m.. just go see Hongo-“ He stands and suddenly doubles over, hacking more violently than you ever have.
“Shanks!” You stand up and hold him, trying to do anything, starting by patting his back. It sounds like he’s choking on something. “Shanks hold on I-I’m gonna get someone!” He grabs onto you, his face slightly pale and fearful, but it was a mistake; he only has one hand and it’s no longer able to cover his mouth.
HACK
He coughs up blood. In the middle of the splotch is a small singular flower. You stare at it.
“..shanks? what.. what is that?” He coughs a little more before standing up straight.
“I was drinking tea, must’ve-“
“Hanahaki.” You state and he stops. “You have Hanahaki disease.” The coughing, the mention of blood, the way he was so adamant on not being seen for absolutely anything, the hiding of his hand. He wasn’t just hiding blood he was hiding petals; and coughed up a whole flower. His is more progressed than yours.
The love of your life is dying.
Next
Phew! Anyway first batch of requests opens in like 30 min. Im writing this at the 12 though so its longer for me.. also i have a bunch to do today. Lets hope i dont forget or something else.
when i go out hiking or something i always feel like its a shame theres no animals licking my sweat off. It feels like a waste. I dont want this gross ass sweat on me and they want some salt. Wish i could like, summon a goat or something. Play a whistle and it runs to me for salt.
