Valentina

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[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as things i've heard in the locker room... pt.4

(didn't think i'd do one of these again?? but its in memorial for "vil" who's on a break bc of what "ace" and "floyd" did💔)

("yuu" is what i responded)

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deuce: you never know man, some guys get off from being fingered by other guys

jack: are you speaking from experience?

deuce: what? no

epel: don't lie now baby

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floyd: trust me everybody in this school knows that i'm the shit and they about to smell it!

yuu: im pretty sure they always smell it.

floyd: whoa is yuu actually matching my freak today??.... wait a second.

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ace: yo i just found out that eggs work just as good as any lubricant!

jamil: not only are you late to practice, but that is the first thing you say.

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kalim: you know yuu, i find it relaxing when you call my house number in the middle of the night at precisely 02.34am just to rant about your girl friends

yuu: ...i dont do that though

kalim: then who's been calling me at 02.34am every night just to rant about her girl friends?!

(spoiler alert, it was one of the cheerleaders)

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floyd: dude its only been a few hours and i havent rubbed one out yet... im afraid that its gonna effect my kicking

yuu: just how comfortable are you guys with eachother..?

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deuce: it's not a gay thing

jack: there is no way two guys hooking up is not a gay thing!

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ruggie: now that we're bros, does that mean i'm half-black?

jamil: excuse me?

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floyd: whoaa get this guy a strap-on and yuu!

rook: what?

yuu: get the hell away from me.

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jack: OH HELL YEAH!!

jamil: BOOMSHAKALALA YES GOD!!

yuu: never seen those two actually express emotion.

jade: you cannot be talking

yuu: what?

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floyd: everytime i sink my humongous dick into this pocket pussy, i remember my mom

jamil: i'm sorry you WHAT

floyd: yeah? she gifted me this pocket pussy when i was a wee lil boy, im still grateful

lilia: gee i thought you were about to catch a case

leona: doesn't he already have cases of trespassing, drug dealing and almost running someone over?

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yuu: so anyone want red velvet cake? i got nervous yesterday and baked too much.

epel: got nervous? so you baked?

yuu: what? i have habits, i'm human unlike you dogs.

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jade: floyd, i'm pretty sure coach said to spit on the ball, not shit

floyd: he did? oh crap, sorry!

jamil: he shit on the... oh my god OH LORD IS THAT WHY IT WAS STICKY THE WHOLE DAY?? WHY DIDNT YOU TELL US EARLIER

jade: i was benched.

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kalim: hey i think that cheerleaders waving at me!

deuce: dude, look behind you.

kalim: huh? oh

yuu: hey ladies🔥🙏🏽😝😝 (with rizz)

(jokes aside, im quite popular with the ladies and dont know why)

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jack: okay who the HELL whacked off in the bathroom and didn't clean up?

floyd: i used a tissue

ace: i did it yesterday

epel: i flushed it down the toilet

leona: my bad.

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malleus: im not gonna lie, i've been feeling as if im not apart of the team

yuu: welcome to my world, dude.

malleus: ? why do you feel that way, yuu?

yuu: i dont have a penis.

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silver: oh yeah, hasn't yuu been courting this one guy from our class?

ace: no way? i thought she was lesbian

yuu: i'm sitting right here, you know.

[ceramic-raven]

When you click to go into someone's blog and they have the brightest blog theme possible

[valentinaagarcia]

real especially if you're on dark mode and accidentally click on someone's blog just to get fucking FLASHED.

[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as a fist fight i just witnessed

(chat a fist fight just happened today and it was WILD i just gotta share it with yall)

(poorly written in 2nd pov because "you" is basically what i was doing during the fight and i aint the best at writing ykyk)

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you were sat on your chair in the middle of the classroom. yes, in the middle.

vargas had decided that today you were gonna discuss questions about muscles etc. which is why you didn't have to run around today like a sweating pig.

"no, like i actually don't have an opinion on it." "yeah sure...." deuce side eyes you while he writes something down on his notes.

you continue discussing about the questions for a while until heard epel screaming in the back row.

you snap your head back and the only thing you see is epel bolting towards floyd, who was grinning.

"you think your so fucking funny, huh?" epel spits as he slaps floyd across the face. floyd's grin immediately disappeared as he stood up from his chair.

epel grabs his shirt and scratches up his chest a bit which made floyd swing his arm back-

-and hit him square on in the face.

epel grunts and lets go of floyd while vargas tries to seperate the two. "quit it!" teach yells with a growl.

vargas quickly grabs floyd's shirt and tries to drag him out of the classroom but epel followed him.

epel grabs floyd's computer and smashes it on his head which made vargas use his arm as a barrier so they'd stop.

"epel out now!" vargas spits and attempts to push epel out of the classroom but said boy growled and punched floyd's stomach.

floyd uses his foot to kick epel out of the classroom but apparently he used to much force or something because epel dropped his pants

(chat this happened.)

when vargas succesfully gets epel out of the classroom he shuts the door behind him and runs after the periwinkle haired boy.

floyd lowers his hands because he had them in a boxing position and straigthens his back while clearing his throat.

"sorry gang." he apologizes and walks back to his seat.

your mouth was covered the entire time and during the fight you kept looking at deuce to see if he was seeing the same thing you were.

ace (who was seated next to floyd) giggles and runs a hand through his hair. he stands up from his seat and walks over to you.

he stands behind your chair, "man! we were just messing around with epel and when i look back at floyd all i see is him swingin at epel!" he snickers.

you look up at him, "bro all i hear is epel screaming and when i look back floyd's punching the shit outta him"

cater looks around the classroom, "guys what do we even do now? should we go to lunch orrr...??"

everyone went to lunch after the fight and the entire day, that fight was the main topic in the entire school.

the end.

jkjk no but deadass that fight was so intense that the entire classroom was quiet and in shock.

i think the funniest part tho was that we had a test right after lunch💀 like a fucking fist fight happens and after that we go eat and then we gotta calculate math

and then after school we gotta stay for practice and "floyd's" on our team so it was kinda awkward

but then again "floyd" can literally not shut the fuck up so he was talking about the fight the entire time

[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as things i've heard in the locker room... pt.3

(yall re probably like "what the hell val? another one🤨🤨 yes. another one. ans for my new readers- im on the boys team as a gril)

(yuu is what i responded)

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floyd: sometimes i just feel like i wanna kill myself

ace: me too man

jamil: im actually gonna kill myself.

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ace: sticking our your gyatt...

floyd: for the rizzler...

jamil: get out.

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ruggie: i love you man have a good game

leona: yeah.

ruggie: your not gonna say i love you back?

leona: what if i killed myself

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yuu: someone hook me up

kalim: i have a cousin i dated for three months before realizing she was my cousin, i could hook you up with her!

yuu: what th???

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ace: yeah and the worker was like "dont open door i told you dont open door!" (filipino accent)

deuce: oh oh and then he was like "i scold you, you open door again i hit you!" (filipino accent.... not filipino)

ace: ohawh.. man uh.

deuce: what?

yuu: dude you cant say it like that since your not asian

deuce: what? but you talk like a hispanic person all the time?

yuu: i wonder why.

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riddle: okay, lets just move on from the accent thing alright?

deuce: yep! ill stick to my accent and stop using others

trey: howdy y'all, good game mate

deuce: howdy mate! good gam..

riddle: ...

deuce: ill stop using other accents... starting now

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cater: hispanics are so HOTT like you guys dont get it

jack: shut up were meditating before the game quit it with your hispanic fetish.... god

cater: you guys dont get it.

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ace: personally, i listen to justin bieber

jamil: im more into lana del rey

jack: megan for me

floyd: i listen to cardi b! how about you, yuu?

yuu: laufey and alex g

malleus: i love you (listens to both)

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malleus: mary or sarah?

yuu: sandy

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ace: yo dude i think yuu might be buffer than jack

deuce: no way???

ace: YUU JACK

yuu:huh

jack: hm?

ace: can you both flex your muscles???

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jack: you are not buffer than me.

yuu: shut up hoe, this is why i got a bigger dick than you

jack: you have a penis?...

yuu: for sure bigger than yours.

(i do in fact, not have a penis)

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floyd: okay so listen guys, we need to get the shampoo and shove it upp our areolas and run around naked on basket field

azul: who.. wha??? oh my god are you high?

yuu: its the ace incident all over again...

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epel: yuu genuine question, what does pussy taste like

yuu: ....? it tastes like pussy?

epel: i just ate a pussy.

yuu: man....good for you i guess? wait WHAT

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(for context a bird flew into the glass and flew into the locker rooms)

deuce: OH MY GOD?!?

epel: KILL IT

kalim: no dont kill it!

ace: yuu do something!!!!

yuu: why are you asking me? your the man

floyd: JUST DO SOMETHING

yuu: ugh.... men only act proud and strong to flaunt.

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floyd & kalim: THERES A SPIDER

kalim: JAMIL HELP... me?

jamil: *fucking hiding on top of the lockers*

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yuu: why didnt i become a cheerleader.

[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as things i've heard in the locker room.. pt.2

(bet yall werent expecting this😈 anyways yes i am on the boys team because there was no girls team and it is NOT like k drama)

("yuu" is what i responded to what i heard)

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floyd: back up against the wall and bend over

jamil: WHAT

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(for context they were doing tigress poses from kung fu panda🔥)

kalim: ching li chong lang

riddle: okay that's just racist, you can't say that when there are people of color in the room man

yuu: why are you all looking at me im not chinese???

ace: why are you assuming it's chinese? racist.

yuu: oh so that's how it's gonna be? kill yourself.

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jack: okay guys we actually need a strategy to win this match

floyd: coach send me a dick pic

everyone: HE WHAT?!?

(coach meant to send that to his wife and we had an assistant coach for the entire week because he couldn't face any of us😭)

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jamil: you all go assault eachother with balls, i'm out.

ace: lowkey bet, deuce come over here buddy

deuce: in public??

epel: for free??

jack: why is nobody questioning that they've done this before?

leona: how do you know they've done this before huh?

jack: hm.

ruggie: .... HOW DO YOU KNOW???

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kalim: yuu..so you know that girl that i was talking about?

yuu: yeah whats up?

kalim: so last weekend i saw her at a gathering...

yuu: ohhkaayy.??? so did you talk to her

kalim: ask me what type of gathering it was.

yuu: ...????what type of gathering was it?

kalim: a family gathering.

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yuu: yo whats going on i really gotta piss why are you all hogging the toilet?

lilia: they all shared ace's pocket pussy but noone cleaned it

yuu: okay what the fuck.

lilia: yeah, they used eachothers semen as natural lube

yuu: i didnt ask you to continue.

lilia: they might have some sort of penis disease

yuu: why didn't i become a cheerleader.

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jack: okay guys cant we just be a normal football team PLEASE

jamil: i am tired of trying to play footbal only to get fingers shoved up my ass.

vil: you've gotten fingers shoved up your ass?

jamil: look i know your new to the team but.. you haven't? ace, floyd.. are you going easy on the rookies

floyd: nah i broke into his house yesterday

ace: yeah and i hit up his girlfriend

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cater: yo i heard rumors that yuu used to be a man

trey: no way? YUU

yuu: what?

trey: did you have a penis before?

yuu: no but if i did it would for sure be bigger than yours

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ace: bruh sometimes i forget that yuu has a coinslot

jack: ace shut up.

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yuu: bruh sometimes i forget that ace has a penis

ace: i said i'm sorry, your just so masc..

yuu: i will hit you.

jack: yeah its not her fault that she's buff! its okay to have insecurities yuu-

yuu: die

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floyd: i mightve just snorted fiberglass guys

jade: oh

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rook: people with homophobia are so pretty

epel: isn't it heterophobia?

vil: its fucking heterochromia

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deuce: yuu.. this might be shocking but your the only girl that i can talk to without stuttering with

yuu: not shocking at all.

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jamil: what the? WHY THE HELL IS THE WATER FROZEN?! FLOYD

floyd: wasnt me!

jamil: ACE??

ace: dont look at me

jack: jamil calm down i froze them so the water after training could be colder but it didnt melt fast, sorry

jamil: oh no worries man

floyd & ace: THE FAVORITISM???

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lilia: look at malleus.. poor guy, cant believe hes goalie

leona: YO malleus!

malleus: hm? *gets fucking knocked out by the ball*

sebek: OH MY GOD.

lilia: goodnight malleus

[valentinaagarcia]

twisted wonderland characters as things i've heard in the locker room

(im speaking in the boy locker rooms, im on the boys football team as a chick and i might be called a pick me for it but there was no girls football team💔)

(btw "yuu" is what i responded to what i heard)

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floyd: uhm.. you guys i might've ate raw salmon and i shit myself

ace: right now??

jamil: i fucking can't with you floyd, last week you made out with a boy and now you got fucking tapeworms or some shit

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kalim: sorry i'm late guys, how is everyone?

jamil: i'm gonna puch you so hard that your dick is gonna go up your throat and your gonna choke on your cock and die!

kalim: so glad i asked

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ace: some guys get off from other guys fingering their asses, who knows

yuu: what the fuck is the context to that?? i went to the toilet for TWO MINUTES

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yuu: well duh i have boobs? what the hell is wrong with y'all i'm not an actual dude

ace: i can tell you have boobs now, i'm looking right at them

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epel: okay i need to be honest with you all, i used to masterbate with motor oil

deuce: wait i used to do that too until my ex saw me when i was whacking off and tried to lit my dick on fire

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ruggie: come on guys we're gonna go play football! no teams

leona: pretty sure you need two teams to play football

jack: yeah that's the whole fucking point

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ace: i neehd.. the uh, the thing that you ball kick around

yuu: are you high?

ace: hi

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floyd: WHOOP WHOOP yeah us upperclassmen win another round!

jamil: did you even measure it?

floyd: yeah with my dick

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yuu : can you guys stop messing around for five minutes please? i'm trying to make us a plan

floyd: why u never match my freak

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kalim: yuu your a girl right?? this cute girl i've been talking to is so sweet and i wanna buy her something

yuu: not a car

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leona: remember when coach benched you because you were "too good"?

ruggie: yeah?

leona: he was lying, you fucking sucked

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floyd: okay everyone take off your shirts!

yuu: no thanks

ace: why not?

yuu: i'd rather not flash you all

ace: good call

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jade: i can't believe i have to perform infront of everyone..

floyd: just do the whip and you'll be fine

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epel: GUYS.. GUYS MY....... INNER EGOIST ARRGHH

jamil: we're not even playing right now???

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floyd: coach is such a boomerrr...

lilia: boomer? more like fossil

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ace: okay everyone important announcement, i have to make a powerpoint on sexual education so can i demonstrate on deuce infront of you all?

deuce: and you say your straight

epel: i don't think deuce likes the idea of public sex

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yuu: i just saw a pad stuck to the ceiling in the girls bathroom

floyd: did you lick it?

[valentinaagarcia]

so.. am i the only one who is SOO excited for the twisted wonderland anime but at the same time doesn't want it to be an anime? dont get me wrong i want it to become an anime but i'm scared that twst is gonna end up in the wrong hands and it'll become like the mha fandom or smth since theres a lot of guys (basically i dont want people to sexualize them for fanservice)

[valentinaagarcia]

"floyd is yandere"

no.

he's just a silly dude with mood swings, possibly bpd idk. mfs make me so mad when they say they're NOT one of THOSE twst fans then tell me that floyd would be a yandere.. just quit it mate, stop it !!