obidei is such an interesting ship, because technically it's a simple trope
— A is hiding their identity for personal reasons, while having a trait that B hates
— B respects / likes A, or rather A's persona
In short: perfect angst, but it's completely overlooked by fandom, not to mention their simple platonic relationship that is also mischaracterized. No, Deidara doesn't hate Tobi and doesn't whine that Sasori has died and left him with this “idiot”. Deidara enjoys being in a “senpai” position, even though Tobi teases him.
Obidei is very flexible ship; you can headcanon either Deidara or Obito as tsundere, it will technically fit. Both can be also open and flirty, it fits. However, Obito is not a rapist nor abuser, and Deidara is not small dependent boy, who only cries.
Obidei can be toxic, their relationship can be unhealthy, and Obito can be maniacally dominant — but only when he's torn between his “madara” and war arc persona. I feel like people don't analyze it enough, or it's just me who hadn't found this kind of content.
They both fall under the concept of nihilism, but on different spectrum. They can both symbolize ephemeral youth, where Obito's was taken away from him, while Deidara's dies with it.
Obito is spiraling down, falling “into hell”, rotting, Deidara flights up, higher and higher wanting to touch the sun and getting burnt.
They both crave validation, to be seen, heard and accepted, yet Obito hides from it, burying his dreams with Rin's death, while Deidara faces it, even chases to the point he chokes on it.
(kishimoto release a novel about them I beg you)
