Some Basic Friendship Skills
Dos
1. Talk about things that interest others, and not just things that interest you.
2. Share the conversation. Don’t talk over others, interrupt others, or seek to be the centre of attention.
3. Be interested in what other people have to say. Ask open questions, and try to find out more.
4. Notice when people do well, and make the effort to praise them for it. Try to be an affirming, and encouraging, friend.
5. Be respectful, considerate and polite. Be sensitive to the feelings of others.
6. Think before you speak. (Sometimes it’s better to say nothing than to speak your mind, or to hurt, upset or offend the other person.)
7. Learn how to ask for what you want and need in a non-threatening, and non-defensive way. Don’t react; and don’t pick needless arguments.
8. Try to understand the perspective of others. Don’t just assume you are right and they are wrong.
9. Look out for others – and be a trusted friend.
10. Back off, don’t dominate, and give your friends some space.
Don’ts
1. Don’t brag about what you’ve done or what you’ve got.
2. Don’t put others down.
3. Don’t judge and stereotype people.
4. Don’t take over the conversation. Let others tell their jokes, and have their say.
5. Don’t try to control other people, or to make them do what you want them to do.
6. Don’t talk, or gossip, about others.
7. Don’t make jokes at others’ expense.
8. Don’t demand perfection – allow your friends to be human, and to sometimes make mistakes.
9. Don’t be sensitive and quick to take offense.
10. Don’t be mean or stab others in the back.
