As she was slowly becoming accustomed to, and decidedly resentful towards, Alison Dilaurentis-Fields returned to her house alone that night. Horrific days had haunted her ever since she had step foot on the BHU campus; it was becoming almost impossible to not regret her decision to move here. Temporarily. She always had to remind herself it was temporary. If her teenage self could see how much she missed- ached- for Rosewood, she would laugh herself to tears. But she didnโt really miss Rosewood, per se. Her heart was just empty without her wife.
โSoonโ she muttered to herself as her eyes wandered across the abundance of photos of her beautiful little family that were scattered over her, the ring that sat patiently on her finger feeling particularly heavy that night. Something felt particularly wrong that night. Possibly because, not for the first time in her life, she could feel herself becoming a person of interest in yet another small-town murder. Numbness was overtaking her. Had it always been so cold in this house? For a moment, she let it engulf her. Pouring herself a large glass of red, lighting a candle and crashing onto the sofa. If the twins were here, she thought to herself, the house would be filled with laughter. With smells from the kitchen of something wonderful as Emily chased Lily around the living room, Grace sat happily watching and trying to help her mommy cook. A slight shiver went down Aliโs spine as she realised how confused they would be. And then her heart went to Emily. All she wanted to do was pick up the phone and start again like nothing had happened between them, like everything was perfect. ย But then she remembered it wasnโt, and it took all the willpower she had not to just chug the bottle of red and call it a night. Her eyes fluttered shut and memories of her wife clouded her mind. Watching her walking down the aisle, looking nothing short of an angel fallen from heaven. The first time they said โI love youโ, stood in the room that would soon become the start of the rest of their lives. All the way back to when they were just 14 years old, with all the stress of school, the first time they shared a kiss. Unconsciously, her hand went to heart and rested their, as tears started to fall down her cheek.
Ali, are you awake? The text message from her wife lit up the room at the time when she needed it most. As if Emily knew- knew that everything was wrong. She hastily took her phone off the table as her heart rate suddenly increased.
Yeah She sent Awake and thinking how much I wish you and the girls were here with me. She hadnโt felt this nervous sending a text in a while. Clammy hands and twitching feet had all the signs of teenage fever. Embarrassment swept over her as she realised how painful it was becoming to watch those three little dots bob up and down. Minutes passed and still nothing; her heart was falling all over again.
Baby, as your wife I need you to open your front door, thereโs something waiting for you.Nothing melted Ali more than being called baby- even over text. She was practically putty as she walked across the floor, wrapping her cardigan around her and not letting herself get excited, but feeling the hopefulness bubbling within her regardless. Cautiously opening her front door, she found Emily stood there, radiating calm and serenity. Suddenly, all stress that Ali had been carrying around slipped right off her.
โEmmy-โ She whispered, no energy to hold back the tears of relief that broke free.
โyour wish is my commandโ Emily joked, clearly struggling with her own emotions as she pulled Ali into a tight, endless hug, rain beginning to pour outside but neither of them caring; they both finally felt safe again. โI miss youโ She said softly as Ali wheeled her suitcase inside, not ever letting go of her hand. โso muchโ Emily had barely settled down onto the comfort of the sofa before Ali fiercely took her face in her hands, gently touching their lips together for the first time in over a month. Her hands were suddenly tangled in the back of Emilyโs hair as she melted into it, gradually reacquainting themselves with each other.
โI miss you all the timeโ Ali whispered, their forehead gently pressed against each otherโs as if any second they were about to sink into another kiss. โIโm scared, Emโ She admitted, the wave of confidence she felt at Emily being here suddenly disappearing. Emily rested her lips on Aliโs forehead; she had forgotten how soft her skin was, and that soft floral smell that clung to her like wool. ย
โOf what, baby?โ Ali was cradled into Emilyโs chest, relishing in the calming sound of her heart beat. Everything that she should be scared of flooded her mind; Nolanโs murderer, Mona going into That Place again, being framed for murder. But the only thing she was scared of was right in front of her.
โOf youโ She said โIโm terrified youโre gonna leave- that Iโve done too much damageโ Emily sighed sadly, but just held Ali even closer, her piercing blue eyes staring up at her with an innocence and beauty that only Ali could achieve.
โIf thatโs how you feel, Iโm sorry for being such a terrible wifeโ
โNo wife should make their wife feel like that. I donโt know what more I can do to prove that I donโt want to live a life without you in itโ Her tone was soft, and they were still tangled in each otherโs bodies, candles flickering around them.
โIโm scared you arenโt over the past. And-and the presentโ
โI know it still creeps up sometimesโ She said sincerely, tracing circles on Aliโs bare skin โtrust me, Iโm trying to beat it out of myself. But that doesnโt mean I donโt love you and trust you with all of me, Aliโ
โI should never have come hereโ Ali whispered โnot being with you I just- I canโt do itโ The feel of Emilyโs fingers on her once again was just reminding her how much she missed it. Her touch, her voice, her smell. All of it washed over her and suddenly she was home.
โItโs just one yearโ Emily promised, still gently stroking her arm as her wife began to fall asleep under her touch โone year and everything will be fineโ Ali murmured a soft agreement, curling impossibly close into Emilyโs chest.
โEmmy?โ she muttered with her eyes closed โI love youโ
โI love you too, babyโ Emily smiled, running her fingers through her wifeโs hair as she slept โalways and foreverโ
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