Toby

I don't know what I'm doing most of the time smile 20 they/she/he

[hella1975]

hi hella, i'm flying across my country (nevada to florida) to visit family and i have taob saved to my books app and i intend to reread it all while listening to hozier for the vibe, i just think you'd like that information,

I DO INDEED LIKE THAT INFO GODSPEED SOLDIER 🫶🏼

[ventisfy]

1 flight down 1 more to go, currently in texas at chapter 10? 11? the book app doesn't translate ao3 chapters well but got to the moment zuko told hakodate the full details of The agni kai, grooving

[hella1975]

big sister hella, how do you feel about Hozier's new song francesca, it means everything to me i'm so happy i got tickets to see him in november

STOP IM SO JEALOUS OF YOU HOZIER'S MUSIC IS ALREADY TOP TIER BUT TO HAVE AN ALBUM SURROUNDING DANTE'S INFERNO? IT'S LIKE HE WANTS ME SPECIFICALLY TO GO CRAZY AND IT'S WORKING OF COURSE HOZIER WOULD WRITE FRANCESCA IN A SYMPATHETIC LIGHT LITERALLY ID RATHER ETERNAL DAMNATION THAN A LIFE WITHOUT YOUR LOVE IF I COULD HOLD YOU FOR A MINUTE ID GO THROUGH IT AGAIN HEAVEN IS NOT FIT TO HOUSE A LOVE LIKE YOU AND I

[boatboysrowout]

i am So Very Interested in the burger king vs mcdonalds au if you're willing to share more 👁️👁️

i'm so glad you asked

it's all grian's fault, of course. 'it'll be great if all my friends got a summer job around the same place!' he said. 'it'll be fun hanging out on our lunch breaks!' he said. 'this is a genius idea, nothing will go wrong!' he said.

it goes wrong in less than a day.

it all starts with scar's job application getting rejected from burger king. he takes this very personally, as the man who interviews him is grian's friend who had just been hired the day before, and scar had been assured he would get an easy in. ren, however, didn't like how many questions scar was asking about their ice cream machine and where their security cameras were placed.

so out scar goes, sulking his way through a successful interview to work at the white castle down the road, joining bdubs and cleo. the rest of grians friends end up scattered in shops around the two restaurants with varying degrees of satisfaction with their summer jobs.

grian, as he is wont to do, waffles around a bit before committing to a job. he's pretty sure he's going to join bigb at the library, but before he decides, he goes to pay scar a visit to make sure he's still not sulking about the burger king fiasco.

that, too, is a mistake.

grian doesn't know what happened. he swears he just meant to stop in and say hi. and maybe play a little prank! just a funny little joke! only he didn't realize how much hair spray bdubs uses and how flammable that made his hair, and really, how could grian have known that the second after he fled the scene of his crime, scar would walk in at the exact wrong moment holding a lighter, making him look like the guiltiest motherfucker on earth?

it's absolutely not his fault.

but.

now scar is out of a job again, and he's gotten it in his head that the only way to get his revenge on ren is to work at the mcdonalds across the street from the burger king and, to quote scar, "make him regret not taking my offer." and listen. this is the third job scar's had in two days. it kind of feels a little bit like grian's responsibility to make sure he doesn't get fired from this one too. but it'll be fine. what else could go wrong?

so much. so, so much.

scar almost immediately goes off the rails. he creates his own customer rewards program in which he refuses to serve a customer if they don't pledge their undying loyalty to the mcdonalds in exchange for scar certified McReputation points. this somehow is remarkably successful despite grain's repeated warnings that this is a scam- scar pulls some strings and grian is forced into kitchen duty after he tries to warn one too many customers. martyn and ren catch word of this and try institute a similar program, albeit to a much less successful degree. scar, however, cannot let that stand.

grian also cannot let that stand, but this is more due to martyn coming over every day during his lunch break and annoying grian by telling increasingly convoluted jokes all ending with a punchline relating to the mcdonald's broken ice cream machine.

so that afternoon grian and scar pay the burger king a visit. scar goes up to the front counter and gives ren and martyn the longest sales pitch of his life, something about cereal, and while they're distracted grain climbs through the drive through window and smashes their ice cream machine with a baseball bat.

that's the beginning of the end.

ren takes the attack way too personally. he gets naked, makes martyn crown him with a shitty cardboard crown, dubs himself the burger king, and declares war on the mcdonalds.

he and martyn set out to recruit for their army amongst the rest of their friends in the area to varying degrees of success. they first go to visit joel in his art shop, but quickly decide to leave after the first thing they hear upon walking in is a conversation in the back room in which someone appears to be blackmailing joel over something in the basement.

they decide to try impulse and tango down at the arcade, and both of them are so confused by ren's sales pitch they just agree to make him go away (they do the same thing when scar and grian visit them a few hours later).

ren and martyn's visit to the white castle is the worst yet. instead of walking in and recruiting bdubs and cleo with their impassioned speech and thirst for justice, the burger king and his hand walk into an active warzone.

there's smoke everywhere. bdubs is screaming. martyn swears he hears a gun go off. cleo is cackling. someone runs past them entirely engulfed in flames. as ren and martyn make a hasty retreat etho cheerfully greets them from his seat on a bench outside the building, tinkering with something that looks suspiciously like a pipe bomb.

they decide to take a break from recruiting after that.

meanwhile, scar and grian have been busy. they've recruited jimmy and scott from the florists down the road to launch a yelp smear campaign against the burger king, tanking them from a respectable 3.8 stars to 1 star in an afternoon. to a normal human being, this would mean nothing, but they text a screenshot of this to martyn and ren with the caption 'this u?'

martyn and ren have never once reacted to anything normally or proportionality in their life.

skizz, one of their regulars, also takes great offense to this. he insists that this is a devastating blow against the burger king's honor, and vows to get revenge.

no one's sure exactly how he does it, but within an hour he manages to trace one of the bad reviews back to jimmy and promptly doxes him, getting him fired due to the content of his surprisingly popular google+ account.

scar and grian, after laughing hysterically for an hour over the fact that jimmy was a google+ influencer, continue their reign of terror over the burger king by taking a selfie of them next to the burger king drive through menu, which they somehow have relocated to the roof of the mcdonalds.

it's the last straw for ren.

decked out in a red cape made of the burger king curtains and armed with a spatula and the fury of a thousands suns, ren marches across the street to the mcdonalds and challenges scar and grian to a winner-takes-all duel.

a crowd begins to gather, with nearly everybody grian knows save for the people involved in what has been dubbed the white castle war, forming a loose arch behind ren and martyn as they begin to chant for a fight.

grian and scar, who came outside to see what all the commotion was about, both predictably panic at the sight of two men in capes charging towards them backed by a crowd chanting for blood. grian tries to claw his way back up the roof while scar, possessed by the spirit of apollo, does the only thing he can and chucks a potato at ren's head.

that potato hits ren square in the forehead and knocks him out cold.

the crowd goes silent.

martyn, thinking ren is dead, drops to his knees and cradles his unconscious body close to his chest and dramatically confesses his everlasting love, vowing to never leave ren's side and to never stop spreading the tale of ren's 'grey long and strong' bits.

grian, upon witnessing this, realizes to his abject horror that he also has gay feelings for his manager.

he has no idea what to do with these feelings, and the crowd is still chanting fight, and he's experienced a lot of stress and unexpected emotions in the last five minutes, so he really can't be blamed when he turns on his heel and punches scar in the face.

scar, surprised but absolutely willing to go along with it, punches grian back, and they begin beating the shit out of each other in the most pathetic fist fight a mcdonalds parking lot has ever witnessed.

meanwhile, there's police cars and fire trucks with sirens on speeding down the road past them, and someone in the crowd realizes 'oh shit are those all going to the white castle?'

so the crowd immediately abandons the world's worst fight to go see what the hell has been going down in the white castle.

it takes a bit, but, with martyn still confessing his love and sobbing over ren's unconscious body, grian finally manages to land a lucky hit and knocks scar out, sending him crumpling to the ground. for the second time that day, grian realizes with horror what he's done, and frantically tries to run to get a medic only to trip over scar's unconscious body and knock himself unconscious as well.

The headline of the local newspaper the next morning reads as follows:

...anyone wanna ask me about my last life mall au

[mellozheist]

The Independent winner

Keep reading

[cartoonaccord]

THE SUN, THE STAR, THE MOON AND MARS

👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁

👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁・・・・・・👁

A THING I DID, I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH!!

[kalsyumtulag]

Hey there, guess I'm new here :D I'm an OC artist and also do hermitcraft & limited life smp fanart! ✨👋

[riacte]

martyn really be like yeah i always wanted to betray ren. btw i cried like a bitch when he died and it left a fragment on my cheek, and also his death permanently ruined me and made me more selfish moving on. yeah i’m selfish and survivalist i don’t need ren anymore *gives ren netherwart* *saves ren from a burning tower* *chooses to ally with him because they’re both broken hearted* *mourns about being an unguided hand and losing comfort because ren’s not here* *wins with the red winter banner tied around him to signify ren is always close to his heart* yeah i’ve always wanted to betray ren,

[cherrifire]

Forget people who never left the desert. I don't think Martyn ever made it to spring.

[minecraft-sideblog-tm]

Life Series angst enjoyers, how are we feeling now that we’ve gotten to the point of “No, no, no, just kill me, you need more time”?

I’ve only seen Grian’s episode so far, but Joel desperately trying to kill someone other than Grian before his time ran out, then frantically yelling “No! It missed! Grian, it’s not going wel-” only to be cut off by the lightning strike and then silence. And Grian wasn’t even looking because I think he was trying to get another minecart for Joel to try again. Like, I know it’s silly block game shenanigans but still ow

[rosaacicularis]

“you cheered for me,” grian told him, accused of him. scar looked down at the finger poking into his chest, then back at grian’s face. his eyebrows furrowed with his confusion. “during limited life. after you,” grian paused, swallowing down a sour taste in his mouth. “after i killed you, you cheered for me.”

“well, yeah,” scar said, grabbing some materials from his shulker box. scar didn’t know if it was because he had a castle to build or because he didn’t want grian to see his hands shaking. “if you win, i win, right?”

grian took a deep breath, shaking his head. “that wasn’t third life,” he said as if scar needed the reminder. “it wasn’t going to work like that.”

“i know,” scar smiled sadly. he looked back down at his shulker, before picking it back up, switching it between his hands so he had something to do.

there was a conflicted look on grian’s face. “then why did you do it?” he asked, and scar wished their hearts were still connected, that he could still feel grian’s pulse in his chest as much as his own.

“i guess i couldn’t help it,” scar said and grian ran a nervous hand through his hair. scar reached out and tugged on it, holding it so that grian couldn’t pull out his hair. grian gripped onto it like a lifeline.

[vampnaps]

i'm back with more dumb memes. enjoy :)

[lunarblazes]

today martyn said that (in his canon) the watchers have been purposefully trying to keep grian from being boogey and he also said that grian, as a watcher, also feeds on the fear of the players. therefore it can be concluded that by depriving grian of the boogey curse the watchers are trying to starve him and keep down his power levels in this essay i will,

[redliferiot]

grian pearl and scott: none of us chose or even truly desired to win, rather, victory was thrust upon us like the cloak of destiny that we all don. victory was unwelcome and in some cases unexpected, it could've been anyone but it was us martyn: i murdered cause i wanted to win and i won cause i wanted to murder

[aofikofi]

congratulations on winning ! youve survived !

[wszczebrzyszynie]

happy birthday to the series ever

[midorikawawas]

Everywhere I go I see him

[trlvsn]

[falconearring]

Sun, Star, Moon, Swords.

Congrats to Martyn!!! Whipped this up real fast once I finished the episodes. Funny, it was my first time watching his POV this season and I really enjoyed it ^_^

[favoure]

for everything you did to me, to keep me alive this long