☂️Vesper Shitposts💖

This is where brain cells, tua, and iwtv fans come to make out with each other.

[jellogram]

I'm so glad wwdits was on FX and they could let Guillermo say fuck because if there was ever a character who deserved to say fuck it's him

[lazzarella]

THE VAMPIRE LESTAT ; 2026 // THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW ; 1975

[v0idwraith]

Daniel’s first line back being “The Cuntessa” vampirism really freed him to be the biggest bitch ever

[homano223]

daniel sucking on that hookah…i know pappy coulda sucked the chrome off a trailer hitch back in his day.

[sillystigmata]

Imagine it’s your 73rd birthday and you’re liking Armand is Alice devils minion reels on Instagram.

[phantombranches]

"Did you eat the baby?"

"Were you a stutterer as a child?"

Spot the difference (it's the same picture)

[icbrothers]

WIP

I've had a busy family weekend but I wanted to keep the ball rolling on this Umbrella Academy piece I started the other day

[roanlovesvampires]

Lestat's recollection of Detroit is honestly so fucking funny and definitely inaccurate at some parts

he's like "first, i took a piss in these eco-friendly urinals. yes, this is VERY IMPORTANT!"

"then a nonbinary vampire and her- i mean their- friend ALSO took huge pisses! she- i mean they- pissed hands-free with their incredibly strong pelvic floor muscles. yes, the vampire lestat respects pronouns, write that down."

"i always wash my hands after using the bathroom. even when i'm fucked up on LSD and ecstasy! even if the other people at the urinal didn't wash their hands! yes Daniel, this is VERY important to write down!"

"and then we had elevator sex so hot that the bellboy joined in!"

"i would have EASILY beat the Fang Gang normally, but you see, i did too many drugs and fucked too hard. it was the sex legs, i swear!"

[vamplire]

imagine going to an auction for your “deceased” ex husband who is also placing bids on his own stuff because unaware to you he is in another body meanwhile you are using the same continuous bidding as foreplay with your second ex husband over the same shit that belonged to your first ex husband who your second ex husband was also obsessed with. this happened to my good friend louis de pointe du lac

[gay-lien-from-space]

Tw: discussion of SA

Holy shit some people are unhinged... This person is literally saying that Armand deserves to be SA'd.

I got this ask after I made a post just saying that it was sad to see Armand being sexualised and abused. I didn't even defend his actions or anything.

To be clear: no matter how bad a person is and how many bad things they've done, that does not and will never justify SA against them. Some of you clearly need to hear that.

[devilsminionbby]

y’all i’m so surprised by how much of the content from the trailers was just in this first episode! makes me think they were actually holding back so much of what they have in store for us this season!!

[roanlovesvampires]

i love Dee! what a businesswoman! work-life balance queen!

[jackdawwhat]

pov you call your employer the cuntessa, you aired his marital drama to the entire world and now you’re making him a musical documentary, you have your Pulitzer and you’re going to get your Oscar, you love being a vampire, you’re not on speaking terms with your old friend or your maker but you’d fuck them nasty given the chance, you’re a fledging and you ripped off another vampire’s head to save your aforementioned boss while he’s high out of his mind. You’re the real cuntessa Daniel Molloy

[sevenbells]

i hear you like viktor hargreeves text posts and i raise you my pinterest folder with 1300 images that remind me of him

[i-know-the-enddc]

what I fucking love is how tvl was written in the 80s and lestat is constantly sayinf shit like “as the kids say 🤪 that’s so rad!!” or whatever, and to me, reader of the vampire lestat in this modern age, that does NOT register the way anne rice intended it.

like it is supposed to feel jarring and insane. it is supposed to feel like lestat has been violently submerged in modern young people trends and culture and is now repeating all the new words he learned like a beautiful fresh baby. but because the book is from 1985, all I think is oh interesting huh I didn’t know that slang term even originated in the 80s how vintage how retro how lestat wow he’s so embarrassing aw aw so cute.

but amc in all their incredible genius decided that honoring anne rice’s original vision of writing an extremely modern and weird book that fully embodied the era it was written in was more important then bringing back the 80s nostalgia thing that streaming services love and it’s incredible to me. now I get to listen to lestat say shit like “labubu FOMO cosplay reddit discord Gen Z more like gen SNOOZE 🤪🤪🤪 safe space pronouns donald trump labubu tiktok dance 🕺🏻” and suddenly I understand what it felt like to be a young anne rice reader in 1985. God…. I understand.

[yaoiblackmold]

Daniel saying that he's going to take his musical documentary about the lead of a flopping rock band who pretends to be a vampire all the way to Cannes is so fucking funny, stay delusional king, never change.

[halyasgirl]