A Letter to my 25-Year-Old Self
This is your 17-year-old self speaking—writing? Anyway... *deep breathes*
Do you freaking know that you are one of the reasons why I am having a hard time in school right now? Writing a letter to you IS A REQUIREMENT AND IT'S ALMOST THE DEADLINE! Send futuristic help pls ;-;
Frustration aside, ano na bes? Ang dami kong gustong sabihin. Ang dami kong gustong itanong. Ang dami kong gustong malaman. Ang dami kong gustong i-request. Sa sobrang dami, 'di ko na alam kung saan at pa'no magsisimula. I don't wanna begin this with a how are you, but I am starting this with a how are you; I can't think of a better way to start.
How are you, Vince? Please tell me you are living the life you wanted now. Tell me you passed the board exam 2 years ago. Tell me you graduated with flying colors 3 years ago. Tell me you were a good third year 5 years ago. Tell me you weren't an awkward hooman 7 years ago. Tell me you passed the UPCAT 8 years ago.
8 years ago... 8 years ago you were so confused about your life. Can't remember it, 25-year-old me? I can; your 8 years ago is the present for me.
Presently, I am trying my best to review for the upcoming UPCAT this October. Maybe you can come here, visit me in my dreams and tell me the answers. I honestly wanna be one of UPCAT's top 50 passers (yeah, this is the 17-year-old you dreaming high). Kidding aside, did you enjoy the UPCAT 8 years ago? Bet it was a fun experience despite the pressure, anxiety, and every negativity you felt. Were there many exam takers during d-day? Saw cute humans? 🙈 I am soooooo excited to take the examination and know your answers to those questions!
But, enough talks about me. Let's talk about you—wait, you and me, we are the same living being, right? Or not? You're technically older than me now. Plus, you are more mature, taller, heavier, more intelligent, more handsome, and there more money in your pocket Hope my descriptions are accurate af. Don't wanna be called conceited. Heh. You've had 25 years to make yourself a better person. Twenty-five. Long. Years. Wow, let that sink in in the next paragraphs.
You are 25 now. Have you accomplished a lot of your life goals? I don't actually expect much considering it has just been 3 years since you graduated in college. However, I do expect you to have gone to a few countries *coughs* South Korea is your priority! *coughs*. I also expect you have met Lina, Kevin, Taka, Red aka Julia, Chae aka Muireann, and Blue aka Patrick. Please don't freaking tell me you lost one of them. They are really great people. Do you still remember how happy you were when you met them in KPop Amino? That was pure bliss right there. Who knew you'd have close internet friends considering how hella awkward you were in person during your teenage years? Hah, nobody, not even I.
Have you gone to a concert or two? Do you have a physical album collection now? Do you still listen to KPop? Boi please say yes. KPop is the best thing that's happened in your life; don't forget that. Do you still stan the same groups you stanned 8 years ago? Bet you don't; you're an unloyal ass anyway 😶 Still, never forget the girls that made your senior high school amazing: Red Velvet and Blackpink. They are all your wives, but you love Seulgi and Jennie the most.
Are you using one of the latest flagship phones now? Note 16, perhaps? (Ew that 16 there doesn't sound good 😂) How does it feel? Does it work as fast as the speed of light? What are the new features? Wait, don't tell me you're an iSheep now? Istg I'ma kill you. Unless the latest iPhone is way, waaaaaay better than the iPhone in 2017 and among all other phones in the competition, I don't approve you using that trash. Just, no. Simply a waste of money. Lina will agree. She'll tell you, in her cute German accent: "iPhones sind scheisse."
Speaking of German, are you fluent in a handful of languages now? Korean? Japanese? Latin? French? Italian? German? Chinese? ENGLISH? Hah. I hope you're still as interested in mastering them as you were 8 years ago. They will come in handy. I swear. And, random fun fact: I wrote this mostly in English in order for you to remember how bad your command of the language was 8 years ago 😂
Do you also remember how bad you were in socializing in person? I've written this earlier, but let me repeat it: you were so freaking awkward when around people you don't know when you were an adolescent. And that's what I hope has changed about you. Don't be afraid of being around people you aren't close with. Don't be afraid of interacting with people. Don't be afraid of making new friends. I'm trying to get rid of that fear. For us two.
There is also another thing that I hope has changed about us. Are you true to yourself now? Are you showing the people around you the true you? 8 years ago, you were only being true to your internet friends, especially to Lina. It was really difficult to pretend, right? Living a life that you don't want, a life full of self-restrictions in order to belong to the majority and please others, a life full of pretentious acts to avoid judgment, a life that can't be called life—that life, it's over right?
Lol things got serious all of a sudden 😅 RIP Vince. This 17-year-old you is just hoping that you are a better Vince there. I can feel that you are, actually. Because hello, I don't want to be a helpless 25-year-old.
Oh well, I think this letter needs to end here, huh? I still have lots to tell you, tbh, but I don't have all day, plus I'm too lazy—we know that—to tell you everything. You'll probably remember your young self after reading, anyway...
... Or not. I just remembered you have poor memory. Sucks. Your loss. Life before 25 was great, hardships and problems notwithstanding (hah big word 😎Did I use it right, hm?), and if you can't remember every single event there, then you are missing out on a lot of amazing things. Boo.
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