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socialistexan

@realphilosophytube , “The Philosophy of Antifa”

“If you’re a political enemy of fascism though, either they lose or you die”

gender-identity-witch

Important

c3rvida3

Platonic intimacy is seeing your friend’s car in the grocery store parking lot and parking so close to him that he can’t open his door and has the crawl through the passenger’s side.

c3rvida3

Platonic intimacy is hot gluing four copies of Resident Evil – Code: Veronica to the ceiling of his hallway closet and seeing how long it takes him to notice that there’s four copies of Resident Evil – Code: Veronica hot glued to the ceiling of his hallway closet.

c3rvida3

Platonic intimacy is watching the graceful curve of his body as he stretches in bed, fixating on the strip of skin where his shirt’s pulled up juuuust enough that you can sneeze on his exposed stomach and then run away while he’s distracted and bewildered by how super gross and unnecessary that was.

c3rvida3

Platonic intimacy is sending him an e-mail that says, “The Harbinger of Boy Sauce is Upon You,” instead of just, like, texting him and letting him know you’re on your way to help him do his shots.

c3rvida3

Platonic intimacy is calling him in the middle of the night and waking him up because you heard a weird noise outside that you’re about to investigate, and you need moral support and also someone to call an ambulance if you end up having to knife fight a racoon.

c3rvida3

No, it’s platonic. If it’s romantic, you gotta’ have a rose between your teeth and one titty out.

tiktoks-we-like

heathyr

The way they say “shrubbery” gets me e v e r y time

carrionthird

[I deserve… husband of the year award.

I just dropped my husband and his family off at the airport, got some coffee, made it home… and he calls me… to say… tsa wouldn’t let them bring their 80$ lush hair… product onto the flight and it was too late to check it back. *zooms in on his face* so he hid it in a bush.

so guess who’s going back to the airport? *voice cracking* to dig through some shrubbery?

we’re here.

*montage of him getting to the shrub in silence and collecting the bag*

that was. so shady.

there was a whole family sitting on the bench in front of the bush and I had to be like *high pitched nasally voice* ‘excuse me, just gotta… heh! just gotta reach in there real quick.’

*running the product through his hair* if he thinks he’s getting this back he’s wrong.]