Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby

...as long as you're with me you'll be just fine - c. a. s. 18+, NSFW. An outlet to explore my sexuality. Might make posts eventually

[virago-sensuality]

quick intro

Maison, she/her

Point of the blog:

i'm not trying to define virago sexuality based on what i reblog, since i imagine every virago experiences their sexuality a little differently. i am just one virago, my tastes don't represent everyone else's.

i reblog things i relate to in a virago way, even if the OP's intent for the post was unrelated to the virago identity (for example: my gfd reblogs are NOT to equate gfd with virago sexuality. i literally just reblog some of them because they're about pretty boys and/or dom women.) and i'll maybe post sometimes.

i'll probably mostly stick to the nsft side of conversations about this identity, since that's what my blog's for, and if i engage in non-nsft conversations it'll honestly probably be from a separate and unassociated blog. (that said please know that the virago identity is more than the sexual side of it! if you’re learning about the identity there are better more explanatory blogs than mine so please look to those for actual information )

basically: i'm a virago, and this blog is focused on the sexual part of that, but if please don’t use my blog as a means to educate yourself on the label (there are better blogs for that) because i’m only one person and i only focus on one tiny aspect of that identity here and there’s much more to it

Rules About My Asks

Do NOT ask me to dom you (or worse, just jump right into roleplay or something). i'm not looking for that kind of interaction here. i will share my thoughts about topics, though, so you can ask me things and interact with me in other ways, but i'm not going to play a role for you specifically. i'm already in a relationship, don't be weird.

I will not be talking about my personal life. maybe some surface level stuff, and my opinions/thoughts on things, but no identifying information about me, and i won't divulge details about my relationship either.

I reserve the right not to reply. i think answering asks is fun so by all means i encourage them, know that i read them all at least, but i might not respond if it's about a topic i'm averse to or something.

anon asks are a privilege. if bullshit happens i will take them off.

[flintloc-k]

my toxic trait is that I see gay porn and think yeah thats doable with the strap.

[virago-sensuality]

never kill yourself. one day you’ll have a boy sitting in your lap cuddled up to you telling you that you make him feel safe. and that’s a way better heaven i promise. you’ll make it, soldier, keep your head up

[virago-sensuality]

that trope of a woman walking around the house in nothing but an oversized button up shirt early in the morning except make it a man

[virago-sensuality]

i love masc4fem vam so much but masc4masc doesn’t get enough love here. so here’s to the masc mollies. there’s something intoxicating bout making a masc mollis feel safe idk. and theres forbidden sweetness in two masculine spirits in love. idk idk something something the doom-embodying knight and her anxious doe eyed stable boy, and the legendary soldiers who have each others backs in war and kiss a lil back in the tent

[virago-sensuality]

photographer virago who does boudoir sessions of her beautiful mollis husband

[yourpeggablemalewife]

Women who are masculine, who can boss and shove me around, who force me into walls and force my pretty mouth down their body.

C'mere I wanna lick your abs and cry on the strap :3

[flintloc-k]

I really don't have a preference of masc vs fem men if I'm honest it's more like they got to be queer and they got to be submissive. That's my type.

[viscasi]

Why I was gone

I left my blog for a bit for a few reasons: Mainly, as with many of you, I had some safety concerns with returning to posting too soon after the wave of hostile attention my blog was receiving, and I had to figure out how to bolster my internet safety.

I know most of you are aware of the post that 0t3 blog made to harass our whole community back in January, but I’m not sure how many of you saw the other post they made, about me and my blog specifically. (Linking it here for those seeking context so that they DON’T scroll through that blog to find it, but for real do not interact with that post or user any further. The less we get involved with them, the better.) Anyway, although I doubt their criticisms of me are at all in good faith or worth taking seriously (given the rest of their blog and the way they’ve treated everyone else), it still made me aware of a potential problem for the future, which is that:

The wave of harassment our community has been facing is probably a marker of the level of visibility we have reached on the internet, and I wanted to take some time to figure out how I’m going to navigate that increased visibility in the future. In other words, this community seems to be on the cusp of breaking containment and becoming known to the rest of the world— and I have realized that, as a result, the scope of people with eyes on my blog will surely change, which has prompted me to regroup and reassess what it is I do here accordingly. To be honest, I also needed a break from the internet for the sake of my mental health.

What now?

So, I’ve been going back and forth about where I see myself in the future of this community.

On the one hand, this community is so precious and important to me, and I want to be as involved here as possible to help continue to build space for it.

On another hand— the reality is that I am no professional debater or essayist, and in many ways, I don’t feel equipped to be (or even have the intention to be) a central spokesperson/representative for an entire demographic of people, which is how outsiders were beginning to see me. Especially in an environment like this where the spotlight and stakes are much bigger if and when I mess up, I don’t think it would be responsible for me to act outside of my skillset. While I have always been committed to accuracy here, and done my best not to speak more on any topic than I felt my knowledge of it allowed, and have always made it clear that I am learning as I go— the situation has shifted now with the increased visibility of our community, and I have come to feel like my education and abilities just aren’t adequate anymore to meet that new scope of activism.

So… how to move forward with my blog. I’m not sure. I think I’m still figuring that out. I think, at least for now, I’ll probably keep a lower profile. I have SO MANY queued posts I’ve been dying to share with you guys, and a lot of reblogs to catch up on, so I’ll probably start there. I’m not sure what to do with the discussion/information posts I have planned, but I might wait for a bit before posting those to test the water.

I began this blog as a hobby project to simply express my experiences, to give myself a space for my thoughts and feelings about being GNC, and to open that space up to others so that we could find some solace in each other’s company. My initial intention with this blog was to use it as a personal social media account, and maybe coin a word or two to make it easier to communicate things in my posts and connect with others over shared experiences. From now on, I will probably return to that initial vision. I think I’ll still stick around to help a little bit with documenting and providing resources, like for definitions of the language used in the community, but other than that I will return to posting more casually.

TLDR I’ve been gone because I had to figure out how to adjust the way I run my blog from now on and have come to the conclusion that I will be steering my blog in a more casual direction.

[flintloc-k]

Do you have any tips on how to know if a man is genuinely feminine? I know i like fem men, but its difficult to know what man might be genuinely so due to stereotypes (specially if you're neurodivergent)

Good question...

@secretscents hit on the gist of it here:

Essentially,, the femboy/lingierie wearing guy (sorry, there's like no good term, I don't want to say fetishist even though some of them are! I hope you understand the genre of person I am referring to) tends to

be found in bdsm, force-feminisation/sissy kink spaces

wears feminine clothes (usually lingerie) specifically for sexual purposes

is otherwise not interested in feminine expression outside of the bedroom.

Femininity to them is cute, pink, quite childish at times, or like over-the-top sexy, like strapped up lacy lingerie, miniskirts, thigh highs, French maid kind of thing. Like, they kind of use it as a shorthand to describe feeling cute or sexual, and when they aren't in that space any more, they default to a more masc presentation.

Uusally their expression rather depends on playing out "sexist" assumptions, ie. feminine = cute, submissive, sexy, the bottom. Submission = humiliation, emasculation, being controlled...

They're actually looking for a typically feminine dominant woman who will "humiliate/emasculate" them sexually but usually, go back to being in a more typical girlfriend-role once all that is over. people that are "into traps" kind of overlap with them, but usually they're looking for a cis fem woman. Ime.

The less experienced of them kind of treat you like a kink dispenser which is another reason why I don't want to know hahaa.

The fem queer guys/transfems that I have met are like night and day.

Usually on queer apps like Grindr or at queer- or traditionally-feminine-interest events that are queer-friendly, eg. knitting groups, book clubs, that kind of thing (can be found at kink spaces but usually will only come out to the queer or trans-only munches)

Expression of their femininity is daily. Like polished nails, earrings, they dress in more colour usually. And it varies a lot. Femboy is a "look" but the fem man will just dress with the things that appeal to him personally which happen to be feminine. Some wear makeup some do not. It ranges.

Almost always better groomed ngl.

Their mannerisms are really different too. A femboy out of costume is pretty much a regular guy, most of his friends will be guys too. Talking to a fem man is a lot more like talking to a female friend. They also seem to prefer women's company/have many female/fem friends. And they're usually very sweet and friendly and just a pleasure to be around! At least for me!

Also while many are bottoms and/or submissives, plenty of them are tops, and/or dominants...you really cannot tell just by looking at a(ny) man what his preference is. They're not using femininity as a shorthand to express their sexual preferences, this is part of their worldview.

Obviously they may still have kinks and like lingerie. But like, in the wider context of the person, the lingerie just becomes "sexy clothing I feel good in" rather than "LOOK AT ME I AM A SISSY SLAAAAVVEEEE" kinda thing.

Hope you enjoyed that essay! It's important for me to say that like neither is wrong. It's literally fine if you have a kink or fetish even if it's "un woke" as long as it doesn't involve actual harm to others I really don't care. But I also don't have to partake obviously, since a lasting relationship is best built on similar values and perspectives!

[flintloc-k]

Having dated both of them, there is a real difference between a femboy/guy who's into wearing lingerie and women's clothing and a genuinely feminine man.

Both are a valid way to express yourself, but I'm only interested in getting to know the latter.

[scaryb4rbi3]

When I call a guy dude, thats how you know I want him on all fours.

[kamirai-k]

This one is really important becasue Saphi made a art piece for one of the scenes in my fic Sweeter Than Honey, Brighter Than The Sun and I'm forever grateful to her for that.

Art by Saphi

[nxtbbx]

NONSEXUAL DOMINANCE IS SO 😩🩷🩷🩷

Having her choose for you? Her placing her hand on your back or pulling you closer in crowded areas? Fixing your hair when you didnt know it was messy? Holding your hand to guide you through crowds? Telling you when you should eat/go to bed?

I just melt just thinking about it😫🥺🫠

[lightmare000]

world hard and cold... karlach soft and warm...

[virago-sensuality]

I really wanna service top a man without it being patriarchal/gross/overly controlling like please let me eat you out sir

i feel there’s lots of residue shame/anxiety around being a dom and/or top because so many of them (mostly conforming men) are jerks with no respect for their partner and youre afraid of people thinking thats what you’re going for.

but then there’s also the fear of people taking it clear in the opposite direction too, thinking that women being service tops is the same as being a tradwife sub. ugh.

communication with ur partner is key as always. but still sometimes it gets to you and it feels like you can never win

[virago-sensuality]

I kinda always hated how society sees bottoming as inherently submissive or degrading. As a virago without bottom disphoria i want to top, but i also want to bottom too sometimes and that doesn't mean i'll ever stop being a dom! (this isn't against viragos with bottom disphoria who just want to top, its a vent towards this dumb world and heteronormativity)

i agree man. i think this is one thing thats especially frustrating about mainstraight cishet spaces because honest to god i think 95% of them don’t even know theres a difference between bottom/sub and top/dom…