Modern Stormlight Archives AU where Shallan and Kaladin are roommates, living with their cats Syl and Pattern, and theyâre arguing about every little thing but theyâre also each otherâs confident and theyâre really at ease with each other.
Shallan drags Kaladin out to drink with her, and heâs always the one to drag her back home afterwards. Heâs the only one of the two who can drive.
Kaladin never tells Shallan when he brings his friends at their place, so the first time it happened, she screamed like âOH MY GOD YOU HAVE FRIENDSâ upon seeing Rock and Teff.
When Shallan begins crushing on Adolin, Kaladin buys ice cream and he lets her gush about Adolin all night.
One day Shallan invites Adolin at their place, and when she says: âwould you like to stay for dinner?â Kaladin walks behind her and adds âwould you like to stay forever?â before running away.
Adolin is convinced that theyâre going together because he canât believe they have THIS level of intimacy without being a couple. They have to strongly deny and Shallan has to kiss him for him to get it.
I mean the first time Adolin went to their place, it was with Kaladin, and Shallan, who wasnât warned, barged into the living room in her underwear holding Kaladinâs jeans like âKAL I SWEAR TO GOD STOP LEAVING YOUR PANTS EVERYWHEREâ. Then she realized Adolin was there, squeaked, and Kaladin took off his own t-shirt to give it to her so she could cover herself. (Adolin watched the whole interaction in awe, and assumed they were going out.)
They trade clothes. A lot. Shallan often buys oversized hoodies and t-shirts so they perpetually steal clothes from each other. To the point theyâre not even sure what belongs to who in the first place.
Before Adolin, whenever Shallan had to go somewhere at night, she would take Kaladin with her because âno way Iâm getting catcalled when the one they think is my boyfriend looks like heâs on his way to murderâ.Â
The walls of their apartment are covered in Shallanâs drawings. Kaladin has a first aid kit in literally every room. Kaladin has a simple bed but Shallan has a double bed so when they need each other at night, they sleep in Shallanâs room.
( âAnd it doesnât bother you to sleep with a guy in the same bed?â
âUh well he doesnât snore and he doesnât pull the covers so itâs all good yâknow. The cats usually bother me more than he does.â )
Sometimes he lets her do his nails, his hair or his make-up when she wanna try new things. She also helps him with studies when thereâs something he doesnât get. They both have a burning hatred for Professor Meridas Amaram.
(âOne day Iâll draw a dick on his car. But a real, detailed dick.â
âI just donât wanna know whose dick youâre gonna draw.â
Theyâre the âawful punsâ roommates. When one does an awful pun, they finger gun each other like âeeeeeyyyâ and everyone else is DONE. They donât know that it actually took a while for Kaladin to even begin doing pun in the first place but Shallan corrupted him.Â
If Kaladin has to wake up Shallan, he wonât hesitate to literally lift her out of her bed, put her into the bath tube and pour cold water on her. Reciprocally, when Shallan has to wake him up, she goes into his room blasting awful music, singing and dancing to it until he moves to stop her.
Their neighbors probably hate them but theyâre too scared of Kaladin to do anything.
Kaladin is the kind of person who acts like heâs not having fun while actually enjoying himself. Shallan has learnt to spot when heâs bored and when heâs just pretending.
Kaladin smiling seems so rare that Shallan draws him whenever he smiles and hangs the drawing somewhere in their apartment. The first time Adolin saw this, he said that Shallan had a good imagination, and Kaladin glared at him.
Itâs usually Kaladin who cooks and Shallan who washes the dishes. They both arenât clean freaks, though Kaladin likes order, but once in a while, one of them will go in a cleaning spree at 2 A.M until the apartment is shining.
Kaladin is the Mom of the two. Except when he decides not to sleep to finish an assignment, then Shallan will go into Parental Mode until he gets some rest.
Kaladin opens the jam jars and smashes the insects. Shallan is the queen of bullshitting her way through a situation. Sheâs also the one to knock at Kaladinâs door at midnight with ice cream because she knows heâs not sleeping and brooding over something but wonât tell her that heâs feeling down.
Shallan is a cuddler (which is lucky because Adolin is also a cuddle monster so basicaly theyâre hugging non-stop) and Kaladin gives forehead kisses to his favorite people (most of the time: the cats). Sometimes, Shallan hangs onto him like a koala as he walks around a room.Â
BASICALLY THEY ARGUE LIKE SIBLINGS BUT THEY LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH AND THEYâRE A PLATONIC POWER COUPLE
