OITNB (Season 3) : Sentence Starters
"Killers don't look like killers if they're good at their jobs."
"You know what gives me a headache? This job!"
"Ka-ching! Check it out! Woody fucking Allen. Now, that's some Jew shit right there."
"It tastes like Play-Doh."
"No one in here is people."
"More often than not, people believe what you tell them."
"One drop of ethnic blood, and bam, I'm basically made in China, like you and my toothbrush."
"I could be some kind of ax murderer who wants to make coats out of the skins of babies or something."
"Look, if you wanted to look like a real woman, you would let your roots grow out and get some bags under your eyes."
"I refuse to be invisible, _______. Not for you, not for _______, not for anybody."
"Maybe this is exactly where I am supposed to be right now."
"Go ahead and call me Jesus from now on 'cause this bitch just worked a miracle."
"I feel stupid for being in here."
"_______'s not my mom. Wouldn't wish that on her. I wouldn't wish that on anyone."
"Books are made from paper and trees, so we thought they should be returned to the trees from whence they came and everything."
"I owe my younger self 23 years of wild sex with multiple partners, but I'll settle for my name back."
"You know, historically, me and reality...not friends."
"Man, this was the pill before there was a pill. It's cheaper than condoms, and make your coochie crack smell like lemon fresh."
"If you say "bean leaves" one more time I'm going to punch you in the fuck hole."
"How does that work, with you being a lady-man and all? "
"I don't know from these things. That's why I'm askin' questions."
"A good mother does what's best for her children. And maybe what was best for your children was wipin' 'em out before they had to lead miserable fucking lives."
"Oh my god, this is such a metaphor for their lives."
"Well fuck her. I'm done with mamas. and stand-ins for mamas. I am parent free, and proud."
"God. This is the loneliest place I've ever been and I lived in a tree for eight months."
"Hey, you know who made up that never snitch bullshit? People who probably deserved to be snitched on."
"You really wanna be callin' me a lady-man when I got a fistful of your hair in my hand?"
"Here's the thing about mamas. They're only mamas as long as they got kids."
"I just got word that I'm taking over your job."
"I've masturbated. There was this statute of Jesus that was especially ripped. That was my guy."
"I do like you down on your knees."
"It's not the dying that's hard. It's that I have to do it here."
"There's too many people in here. It's making the air feel weird."
"You're still hot. I mean you're a horrible person, but you're hot as hell."
"We keep the fence between us, but we can all see each other."
"If you want to assassinate someone, vision is a basic requirement. It's like step 1, pick a person to kill. Step 2, kill the right person."
"I will potato her at a future time."
"The trick is to imagine the bugs being bugged by you. You can’t give away your power."
"Why do girls like it when men call them sluts during sex? Or bitches? Or dirty whores who love cum?"
"The world is better in black and white. And red."
"Six months old, and she shits like a human."
"And once you rip it off, all we are to each other is scars."
"Are you saying mouths evolved to give blowjobs?"
"We all think we're the good guys."
"Once you know Santa Claus isn’t real, it’s all downhill from there."
"So it’s a woman thing. It’s always a woman thing."
"It’s not just sex. It’s love. It’s two people connecting…with four other people…and aliens."
"Clarity is important. You should be meticulous with your words."
"Because a doughnut thats selling doughnuts is basically a slave trader."
"Thug life has turned you cold."