Sometimes Gallops Horses

But mostly stalks AO3 authors…

[inkyami]

Happy whatever it is you celebrate this winter 🎊 Missed the Snake year due to depression, but couldn't pass my favorite childhood animal

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[wears-white-silk]

Reminder to exercise your horse before you ride it. They tend to buck if you don’t get a bit of the tickle out of the feet first 😜

[crystalcrossing-remade-deactiva]

shit man tomorrow is christmas eve i swear yesterday was June 2010

[allegedly-human]

As is tradition in tumblr culture the locals unearth the corpse of a long deceased figure and drag it across the streets merrily, laughing at what is preserved of the person’s words. This custom, seen as morbid in other cultures, is instead done gleefully and with an unmatched enthusiasm

[wears-white-silk]

The worst part about this is I’m pretty sure it was still June 2010 yesterday…

[manicorcishdreamgirl]

A hill i will die standing on is that picky eaters deserve respect and accommodation and to eat food they enjoy too. Sensory issues, disliked flavors, allergies, intolerances, cultural differences, religious restrictions, moral or political choices, they all deserve to be given consideration if you know you're gonna be cooking for them and to not be excluded from the fundamental right to food & access to the many important social bonding acitivities centered around food

[wears-white-silk]

If I’m cooking or selecting a restaurant for friends or family, of course I cater to their food desires. I love those people. Why wouldn’t I want them to enjoy their food??

IDAF if it’s allergies or you just hate something. If you don’t want it for any reason at all, I absolutely will not put you in a position where you eat it or go hungry. I’m very lucky to be surrounded by friends and family who share the same values.

[xeduo]

Okay so I’m an elementary school art teacher right, and I have this really fun game I made a PowerPoint for to teach like, emotions and intent and looking at the whole picture to first grade.

The idea is, when we count down and change slides, kids have to mimic one thing in the painting as best they can, whether it’s animate or inanimate. If there’s nothing in the shot for them to mimic (because I threw some contemporary abstract stuff in), they have to show me how the painting makes them feel. Easy enough, gets them excited to move around and vocal about their feelings regarding art, it’s very chaotic. I can tell pretty fast who’s got the emotional maturity to mimic things in a complex way, and who’s just enough of an abstract thinker to mimic inanimate objects early on in the game...

So the first picture is this:

Napoleon Crossing the Alps. My favorite reactions are usually the kids who pretend to be the freaked-out horse, but 2 memorable occasions were the one where a student immediately scrunched up to be the rock in the foreground, and the one where a pair of girls, without any communication on their parts, decided to be Napoleon riding the horse with one as Napoleon and one as the horse. Basically one of them fully tackled the other apropos of nothing, it was hilarious

I’ll add more if y’all want or if I feel like it lol I have a bunch of stories from this one game

[xeduo]

Okay so later in the lineup we get to Dalí’s Persistence of Memory, which is very funny because it’s preceded by several pieces that have like, obvious people in them, so everyone’s gotten a bit complacent in their mimicry

In case you’ve forgotten, this is Persistence:

And I swear every time, there’s a beat right before everyone either becomes a tree by t-posing for their life, or goes boneless like some kind of child-shaped pancake over the nearest flat surface

Highlights from this one include a pair who decided to drape themselves pancake-style over the same desk and banged heads, resulting in 2 ground pancakes, and someone who fully just stood there staring, and explained that they were expressing the hatred they felt as soon as they saw it

[xeduo]

Last installment: one of the pictures is The Scream, and everyone very quickly just makes a 😱 face, but then we get to talk about my favorite “throw spaghetti at the wall” topic, why is he screaming? (The answer is Existential Dread, but it’s not appropriate to tell 1st graders that so instead we all put out other ideas lol)

In case you haven’t looked at it recently, this is The Scream:

My favorite guesses from the kids to Why Is He Screaming:

-those guys behind him are going to arrest him

-he missed his boat and it’s one of the ones in the background, he just noticed

-the sky’s all wiggly

-he just wanted to scream

-HE CAN SEE THE CLASS OF FIRST GRADERS LOOKING AT HIM AND HE DOESN’T LIKE IT

Children are bonkers

[what-even-is-thiss]

You know for the first 18-ish years of your life everyone your age is mostly doing the same things and then all of a sudden every year for the rest of your life somebody your age is getting divorced while somebody else just learned what a leaf is and you have no idea what’s going on or what you’re supposed to be doing

[wears-white-silk]

Screaming into the void for an adultier adult to deal with this bullshit

[teaboot]

what annoys me about explaining evolution to people who don’t think it’s real is that everyone’s idea of how it works seems to be from this

Whereas the reality is far more like

[teaboot]

Was not expecting this many of you to resonate with Millennium Death Plinko

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[imanutcase-10]

Then bring me luck

[thirddeadlysin]

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

[imsobadatnicknames2]

[defilerwyrm]

There’s this guy in town who owns this little house, and a while back he rescued a street dog that was going to get put down. Turned out she was pregnant.

Problem is, he has mental health & drug issues and couldn’t afford to get them all spayed & neutered, so now there are 6 grown bitches with 15 puppies total, and they’ve dug under his fence in multiple places but he can’t afford to fix it so they go roaming all around town. (When I say can’t afford it, I mean his house is currently running on a generator because he can’t afford his electric bill.) He’s also a day laborer so he cannot take multiple full days off work to take them to the vet an hour away. He’s in a really rough spot.

He’s not a bad person. He’s just overwhelmed.

And this little conservative town with 6 churches for 300 people, have they tried to help their neighbor? Have they adopted the puppies he’s been trying to give away? Have they offered resources?

NOPE! All they wanna do is talk shit about him and complain about the dogs but never lift a finger of their own. And they come to his house to yell at him and cuss him out about the dogs, which does not exactly engender in him a cooperative attitude, as you might imagine.

So after a while of this going on, my mom gets fed up with all the NIMBY bullshit and starts talking to the guy, because she’s done animal rescue for 20-odd years and has Connections. He’s resistant at first, but when he realizes she’s not being an asshole to him on account of his addiction or the dogs, he decides to let her help.

She gets to work organizing and networking. Finds a non-profit that will cover vaccinations, spay/neuter, and flea treatments for all the dogs. Talks the next-door neighbor into paying for materials to fix the fence, since this guy can do the work of it himself. Gets him in touch with another non-profit that will adopt out the adult dogs.

Less than 2 weeks after she decided to do something, all puppies have been to the vet, 10 puppies and 4 adult dogs have been adopted out, and the second non-profit is coming by next week to pick up the remaining 7 dogs to ship them out for adoption.

I’ve learned a lot of things from my mom—some good, some bad—but I think the most important positive message she lives as an example of is this: sometimes, when something needs done and no one else is willing, you gotta stand up and say “I’ll do it.”

[snazzymolasses]

The most mind-blowing revelation I received on this lesson happened to me when I was in college.

I was driving along a mountain road with a person I kinda knew in the passenger seat (like a roommate of a roommate or something). The road was very narrow, very twisty-turny, steep cliffs on both sides. I came around a blind curve to see a huge tree branch in the road. I managed to swerve just in time to avoid it, and also not veer the car into the sheer cliff face going up on the left, or of the sheer cliff face going down on the right.

"That's so dangerous. Someone should move that." I said.

"You're someone." said my passenger.

I very slowly pressed the brakes, my car slowly rolling to a stop as what he'd said started to sink in to my brain.

It had never occurred to be before, in all my life, that I could be the "someone" who could fix the thing. Not ever.

It was dangerous to stop here. If another car came, they could easily hit me, as it was a blind curve. We talked about it, decided it was worth the risk to possibly save a life, and we quickly ran to the branch and moved it to the side as best we could, then hurried back to the car.

It changed my life. After that, every time I have the thought "Someone should _____", I now hear that voice. I'm 'someone'. Now I evaluate whether I'm able to do something about a situation- that doesn't mean I always can! Sometimes I truly don't have the energy, knowledge, or time or money to fix something. But I should at least think about doing it myself- consider that I could, and weigh the options, which I never did before that moment.

[hawkeyedflame]

i love listening to my fiancée drawing

“no stop” “oh no i didn’t mean to do that” “wRONG LAYER” “wait go back” “what line is that?!” “cAN YOU– [irritated noises]” “oh you…bastard” “what..layer is that on??”

she’s so cute djksfh

[hst3000]

A gift for your fiancee

[hawkeyedflame]

oh my god dkfjdhgksdjk

[hawkeyedflame]

happy 2023 my wife is currently making incoherent angry/confused noises because she painted on a layer somewhere several hours ago and now she can’t find which folder she put it into

[hawkeyedflame]

you guys it’s almost 2025 and wouldn’t you know it, my wife is still painting on the wrong layer

[saphronethaleph]

Fascist, Thus Inefficient

“As you can see, my young apprentice, your friends have failed,” the Emperor said, triumph in his tone. “Now, witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational battle station!”

Luke looked at him in shock.

“Fire at will, Commander!” the Emperor said.

Fourteen months previously…

“Shipment IL-214-73 arriving,” a petty officer reported.

“Thank goodness,” muttered one of the technicians. “After the delays we’ve been having, we need to get those Khyber crystals into the third main focusing array. It’s been on the critical path for a week.”

He brought up the display, frowning. “All right, I think we can make up a bit of time if we just get them straight to cutting and installation.”

“Don’t we need to run them through the testing process first?” a more junior technician asked. “That’s on the list.”

“I know it’s on the list,” the senior tech replied. “But the list was written when they didn’t expect there’d be rebel attacks hitting our supply lines.”

He waved at the screen. “The testing process means heating each individual crystal up to eighteen hundred, even though we know Khyber can all handle temperatures of up to forty-seven-fifty. The cutting process doesn’t rely on heat tolerance either. Any crystalline flaws will come out in cutting, and we can just junk them. It means cutting takes a bit longer, but by going straight to cutting we can save at several hours on the overall process. And you know how much time we’ve lost already.”

The junior tech looked worried, then shook his head.

“All right,” he replied. “I guess so.”

“You need to learn how things are done in practice,” the senior tech said. “No big deal.”

Eleven months previously...

“I’m quite sure Rothana Heavy Engineering’s XJ-15 hypermatter feed systems will meet your needs better than the alternatives,” the Rothana representative said, as Admiral Jerjerrod examined the datasheet.

He wasn’t so sure. The newer units had better specifications, certainly, but they weren’t proven, and they were also somewhat more expensive.

“I don’t think that’s necessarily the case,” he said, out loud. “While I appreciate Rothana’s position, the Sienar alternative has similar flow rates and more proven applications.”

The Rothana representative nodded, sagely.

“I understand entirely,” he said. “However, I must point out that Rothana has some important additional information to present.”

He held out a credit chip, which Jerjerrod took and inspected.

“Owing to the XJ-15’s protracted development, we are willing to provide our test units at cost,” the representative went on. “That is in addition to having a higher production rate than our competitors and a less committed production output.”

Jerjerrod hesitated, then pocketed the credit chip.

“That all seems in order,” he said. “The XJ-15 it is.”

“Marvellous,” the representative declared.

Nine months previously...

“I’ve examined the records that exist from the first Death Star,” a senior technician said. “The amount of strain that was placed on the flash suppression systems was minimal to nonexistent. Even with the full firing that destroyed Alderaan, surviving records indicate that the flash suppressors had no more than a five percent load placed on them – an amount that can be handled by untreated durasteel.”

The other men and women in the meeting looked at the data on the screen behind their colleague.

“You’re suggesting we forego the duratemp treatment on the flash protection systems?” one of the women asked, cautiously. “I can see the advantages, but the downsides seem significant. I’d even say potentially destructive.”

“It is my position that the cost of including the duratemp treatment is unacceptable,” the tech replied. “It takes time and effort, including supervisory attention which cuts into the available man-hours on the project. We only have so much experienced manpower.”

That drew winces, though none of the humans in the room drew attention to the fact that they were spending a lot of that time in interminable meetings.

“In the following presentation, I’ll discuss my proposal and how it could shave as much as one week off the final completion timetable,” the senior tech continued, flicking to the next screen of his presentation. “This model shows how the flash suppression systems are built around the main weapon…”

Six months previously…

“There simply isn’t an option,” the head of personnel replied. “Our existing system is not providing enough technicians and operators.”

“This was quite sufficient for the first Death Star,” Jerjerrod protested.

“The first Death Star was a project that took decades,” the manager replied, shrugging. “It didn’t come up at first, sir – for that I apologize – but if we are going to redress the problem, we need to act now. There is no alternative.”

Jerjerrod rubbed his temples, thinking about the problem.

The fully functional Death Star was going to need hundreds of thousands of qualified technicians and operators, familiar with the systems of the vast battle station, and so many of the men who knew much about the Death Star at the moment were busy building it.

There hadn’t been many left after the destruction of the first battle station, because most of them had been working on it at the time.

“All right,” he said. “So your proposal is…?”

“We keep the same number of trainers for now, but abbreviate the course,” the manager answered. “Two months – at most. Then we have the new graduates train the next batch for two months, and so on. Exponential growth. At twenty students per instructor and a hundred instructors to start with, we’ll end up with eight hundred thousand in six months.”

That was extremely tempting… they wouldn’t be anything like the equal of what they should be, but they could learn on the job.

“All right,” Jerjerrod said. “Approved – see to it.”

One month previously…

“Next item on the checklist?” Commander Jaskier asked.

“Step one hundred and seven,” Technician Mils replied. “Self test.”

She pressed the self-test button, and the computer system clicked and flickered as it ran through the diagnostics.

Data results and readouts went up on the screen, and Jaskier and all the others in the control station watched the results.

None of them had any comment to make about the numbers. The checklist said to run the self test, so that was what they were doing.

“Step one hundred and eight,” Mils went on. “Sign off on results.”

She did that, as well, and Jaskier nodded.

“Good,” he said. “And I believe we’ve finished that half an hour ahead of schedule! Good work, everyone.”

Now.

The firing commands flashed out through the Death Star’s systems, triggering a cascade of further commands, and the whole massive battle station’s main superlaser woke for the first time.

Fifty XJ-15 hypermatter flow regulators controlled the flow of energy from the power core into the power collectors, and the energy being channelled into the system surged rapidly – rising to one hundred and eighteen percent of nominal, above what would have been anticipated, and greater than the one hundred and two percent that the older, more proven Sienar systems would have generated.

Thousands of high powered beams were generated, controlled and focused through an enormous array of Khyber crystals… a small but measurable fraction of which were cheap industrially grown diamonds instead, added to the shipments by subcontractors eager to stretch out their production from the strip-mined planet of Ilum without running so late on their deliveries that financial penalties were imposed.

None of the technicians who were in a position to spot the problem at this stage were actually capable of doing so. Their necessarily abbreviated training had mostly been on what buttons to push, and nobody had the deeper knowledge of the systems to recognize that the system was in an anomalous state.

Then some of the diamonds shattered under the load, allowing the beams free to damage adjacent systems, and in moments the whole of the energy drawn from the hypermatter core was unleashed.

The flash suppression systems were wholly, and fatally, inadequate.

“Watch yourself, Wedge!” Lando called, his head on a swivel, and banked the Falcon around so his ventral turret gunner could clear off one of the TIEs attacking Red Leader. “We’ve got to-”

Then there was a sudden blinding flash, and Lando did a double-take.

The Death Star’s protective shield was instantly, and dramatically, visible – because the entire inside of it was full of plasma and flame, lighting it up as clearly as Ackbar’s briefing had done back before the operation was launched in the first place. Then something blew up on the surface of the forest moon as the plasma followed the funnel of the shield, and the explosive force was no longer contained but began to drift out into space.

“...the kriff?” Lando asked, eventually. “What just happened?”

“Ow,” Darth Vader said, indistinctly, reaching up to feel his helmet, which had been crushed in by an impact with the ceiling.

The Emperor’s throne room seemed to mostly be intact, though there was an Emperor-shaped hole in the window nearest his throne, and Luke had his hands out to either side as he stood on the wall.

“Father, are you all right?” the younger Skywalker asked.

“What happened?” Vader replied. “I remember the Emperor ordering that the Death Star should fire…”

“I don’t know, it exploded just after he said that,” Luke answered. “It turns out that overconfidence was his weakness… do you have any idea where the nearest spaceship is? Keeping the atmosphere in is tiring me out a bit.”

[chandra-telescope]

hope is a skill

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

hope is a weapon you are trained to wield

[chandra-telescope]

favourite additions

[chandra-telescope]

[tenaciouswritingdragon]

You cannot hide this in the tags, bestie. This is too lovely to keep a secret.

[wonderwyrm]

[animatedamerican]

i love everyone in this thread

[oscarwildeboytoy-deactivated201]

Hey, unpopular opinion, apparently. But people don’t just “have pain for no reason” doctors say this all the time (especially to women and chronically ill people) and the truth is, Thats literally not possible. Even if your pains are psychosomatic (a word I hesitate to even use because of the way its used so often) there is a reason you are having those pains whether its mental illness, abuse, etc. If your doctor consistently tells you that “well some people just have pain for no reason” get a new doctor. That’s a doctor who is not going to give a shit what your actual symptoms or experiences are.

[kamorth]

I just wanna add to clarify the psychosomatic thing.

That word DOES NOT MEAN you’re making it up. It doesn’t mean you’re imagining the symptom. What it means is that the symptom ISN’T DIRECTLY CAUSED BY ANY OF THE THINGS THAT WOULD NORMALLY CAUSE IT.

I fought to get a PCOS diagnosis for 2 and a half years. For the ENTIRE time I was fighting, I was dealing with 3 cysts that were not going away by themselves and eventually required surgery to remove. At one point close to the end of the battle, I suddenly went blind. I was visiting my parents and was standing on the veranda looking out over the tree we had planted in memory of my dog and suddenly I got one of the shooting pains that I was quite frankly used to at that point and my vision started to go dark. It was like the sun was setting while being completely hidden behind storm clouds but it was 2pm in the middle of Summer on a clear day. Within about 30 seconds I couldn’t see ANYTHING. I was 27 years old and I was screaming for my mother.

My mum raced me to her doctor (he was a 15 minute drive away as opposed to 45 minutes to the nearest hospital) and he quickly worked out that there was nothing wrong with my eyes and what had happened was totally unrelated to them. Then he said it was psychosomatic and I freaked out, yelling that I was NOT making this up and I definitely wasn’t imagining it. Very quickly he calmed me down and said he believed me and I had misunderstood. He explained that whatever was going on with my abdominal pains (he suggested PCOS which I hadn’t even heard of at that point) had been ignored for so long that my body was starting to do things other than the normal pain response to try to draw my attention to the problem. My sight going was my body basically jumping around in front of me going “HEY ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME HELLLOOOOOOO??????”

He gave me some prescription strength painkillers and my sight started to come back as soon as they started to kick in. About 45 minutes after it started I could see well enough to walk around without help and within a day and a half I was back to normal. On top of that I finally had a scan booked to figure out what the hell was causing all the pain.

Psychosomatic symptoms are NOT imagined or fabricated or happening for “no reason”. Experiencing them DOES NOT make you a liar. It makes you someone who has been battling with something serious for so long that your own body has started to get impatient with you.

[oscarwildeboytoy-deactivated201]

I completely agree. Thank you for sharing this.

[antique-scarecrow]

Psychosomatic symptoms are literally your body flipping random alarm switches just to get any alarm blaring because you’ve been ignoring the regular ones

[roseaesynstylae]

My Favorites of Jedi Appreciation

So, I've been thinking about Jedi positivity a lot lately. So, I decided to make a masterpost. Someone's definitely done this before and better, but I feel like I should throw my hat in the ring.

(There's also A Collection of Posts about the Jedi Order, Part One and Part Two.)

Fics

These fics might not be completely focused on the Jedi Order but they are portrayed positively, or they expand on their culture. Either way, I love them.

Knightrise by deviantaccumulation: In which a new Jedi Order is founded on Mandalore after Order 66.

not the place i was born in (doesn't mean it's not the place where I belong) by ghostwriterofthemachine: Jedi worldbuilding and Young Anakin and Obi-Wan being sweet.

How a Handful of Droid Poppers Save the Galaxy by Zarz: In which Appo is the hero the galaxy needs and Anakin meets consequences.

Yeet or be Yeeted by virdant: In which the Jedi tendency to jump off tall places becomes a competitive sport.

THE FORCE WILLS DOCUMENTARY by js71: Told as a documentary about the Jedi Order, there's a lot of worldbuilding and other things that make my heart happy.

Pragmatics of the Jedi by aroacejoot, ghostwriterofthemachine, loosingletters: A series that created a language for the Jedi, Dai Bendu, which is absolutely fascinating.

On Meditation by virdant: A short fic about meditation. It makes me happy.

Interviews by BloodyDevil: Interviews with members of the Jedi Order.

In which we burn bodies as bridges by GraceEliz: Jedi mourning in a bittersweet fic.

Anakin Skywalker's Guide to Jedi Traditions by loosingletters: A young Anakin's journal about his new life in the Jedi Order.

The Droid Wars by Crystalshard: R2 learns about the future and drags 3PO along with him to stop it.

Why We Did Nothing by BairnSidhe: Do you like the Mandalorians as well as the Jedi? In which the Mandalorians learn about the Jedi Order's perspective on things and Jaster gets rightfully mad. Warning: It has dark themes (among them, discussions of the murder of children, generational trauma, and Montross-related fuckery).

spilled red wine by scrapheap_redux: I was debating whether or not to add this one, but I really liked the portrayal of the Jedi when they show up. However, it has the aftermath and results of rape (not onscreen) as the inciting incident, which is why I was wondering if I should add it; I want this list to be enjoyable and I don't want to upset anyone.

Unsolicited PR From A Pirate by Everything_or_Anything, lastbattlecry, RogueLadyVader (LaylaYuy), TessaDoesThings, wanderingjedihistorian (RangerJedi67): Hondo is a menace. Also, action figures.

Stolen Choices by softmoonlight: Cal, Fox, and the possibility of a happy ending.

free to find my calling by Papook: Jocasta Nu gets a squad of clones.

Always in Motion by virdant: I never knew I needed a Chewbacca time-travel fic so much.

remember me, fondly by ace_din_djarin: Crafts, Jedi, and bittersweetness.

The Bust Busting by virdant: Yoda is a troll. Dooku is done.

Proper Attire by LacieFuyu: Why Jedi don't wear armor.

Out with Lanterns by SkyeBean: Ahsoka is Mace's Padawan.

Lessons of Peace by virdant: Cody embracing Jedi culture and making dumplings.

Memories of Peace by Margan: Obi-Wan teaches the clones to make dumplings.

Home-onym by virdant: Wordplay and Jedi younglings.

In the Shadows (of Taxes) by virdant: Quinlan Vos specializes in tax law. If that one sentence doesn't make your heart jump a little, I weep for you.

hi, i'm with public relations by lastbattlecry: The Jedi need better PR. Bail Organa knows somebody.

In Which Boba Fett Becomes the Jedi Order's Feral Tooka by Zarz: The title explains the beautiful, beautiful plot.

May the Force be Taxed by ReconstructWriter: Palpatine and the IRS do not respect Jedi culture.

aphelion by Kemmasandi: Plo Koon dies, wakes up decades prior, and fixes things.

Protect That Which You Love by certifiedspacewitch: Mace takes one look at the weird old man asking for private access to a young Padawan and gets his hackles up.

jedi shaming by braigwen_s, evaceratops: Short but hilarious.

The Chess Match Begins by SilverWingedWolf: The relationships between Jedi and clones.

Five Jedi Who Signed the Wall on Mapuzo, and Two that Honored Them by TheSecondBatgirl: The title explains the premise in the best way.

You're Not Flawed Darling (You're just a Little Under Rehearsed) by CombatBootsandDreams: To quote the tags, the Jedi diplomatic corps is intense.

A Little Piece of Home by Maeve_of_Winter: Anakin discovers a new form of moving meditation but worries Obi-Wan won't approve. Quinlan does his best to encourage Anakin to tell him anyway.

shining like a lighthouse from the sky by loosingletters: Rumor has it, if you clean up one of the droids in the temple the day before your Gathering, Anakin Skywalker himself will take you to Ilum. Or: Anakin loses his lightsabers and is absolutely popular with teeny tiny Initiates.

the heart of kyber by outpastthemoat: Stories about lightsabers, masters, and apprentices.

吃飽了嗎? | Have you eaten your fill? by virdant: A collection of fics about food and how food is an articulation of love.

I'm Counting On You by Rivulet07: Not all initiates become Jedi, Mace helps Chirrut find his place.

Being a Jedi by wanderingjedihistorian (RangerJedi67): Scenes, musings and drabbles for Jedi June fan event.

Jedi Parables by Peppermint_Shamrock: Values are often passed down generation to generation through stories, parables, and fables. What stories might the Jedi teach their children?

Five Meditations of Jedi Depa Billaba by skatzaa: What is says on the tin. (Plus one more, for good measure.)

Jedi Culture and Teachings in Canon by gffa: Not a fanfic, exactly, but it's a collection of everything textually said in Disney canon about or by the Jedi Order.

Emotion is our Shared Tongue by virdant: A series of one-shots and fics that explore Jedi language and communication with the Force.

Saber-Assigned Soulmates by inimitability: A slight mishap in the mess hall leads to Obi-Wan giving some very interested troopers a crash courses in lightsabers. Specifically, why some people can pick them up but others can't. Even more specifically, what Jedi erotica holonovels did or didn't get right regarding lightsabers and soulmates.

Shereshoy by SailorSol: This was not how Mace wanted to start his day. Contrary to popular belief, Mace Windu did not actually enjoy being a hardass. But as head of the Order, it was a carefully crafted persona he did his best to maintain anywhere outside of private quarters and behind closed Council doors.

permission to speak by qigiined: Mace is trying his damnedest to file the Temple's taxes among other daily tasks. Plo and the rest of the Jedi Council help and hinder him.

Blogs

There are only so many times I can say "I love this so much, it makes me happy, please know you have filled my head with knowledge and my heart with joy" before it gets repetitive.

gffa: FILLED WITH WONDERFUL THINGS. I would marry this blog if I could. (I'm joking...mostly.)

projediagenda: All kinds of thought-provoking stuff that makes me happy.

ensomniaa: As they put it, nothing but love for the Jedi.

the-jedi-love: Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

[wears-white-silk]

Oohhhh Reblogging so I can read ALL the things! What a great list.

[saphronethaleph]

Soresu Negotiations

“Get help,” Palpatine said. “You’re no match for him. He’s a Sith Lord.”

Obi-Wan turned to look at the Chancellor. “...yes?” he said. “But he’s also something else – something I’m surprised you’ve forgotten.”

“What?” Palpatine asked.

“A politician,” Obi-Wan replied, turning back to Dooku.

Anakin groaned, then sat down.

“Here we go,” he said.

Palpatine blinked, looking from Anakin to Obi-Wan.

“...what do you mean, Anakin?” he asked.

“This happens sometimes,” Anakin replied. “How do you think he got his nickname?”

“Count,” Obi-Wan said, at about the same time. “It’s occurred to me that I never actually found out what the Confederacy wants.”

“Isn’t it a little late for this?” Dooku asked. “We have been at war for several years.”

“True,” Obi-Wan conceded, readily. “The war having started on Geonosis, because of tracing back your clone army which we… appear to have appropriated, mostly because you did it in our name. But that’s how the war started – not your objectives.”

Dooku was silent for a moment.

“I assume some semblance of a point will be emerging,” he said, eventually. “If you could be so kind as to provide it?”

“Wars begin for all sorts of reasons,” Obi-Wan replied. “But how they end… they end because a mutual settlement has been reached. And it’s occurred to me that I don’t know what you’d want out of a victory.”

He spread his hand, the one not holding the – unlit – saber. “It’s not the conquest of the Republic, I can tell that much. If the CIS annexed the Republic, what you’d have would still be the Republic, just under a different name… it’s not the Republic without the corruption that’s been causing it problems, because most of the corruption in the Republic was – was – the big industrial concerns like the Techno Union, Commerce Guild, Trade Federation. But you seem to have taken all of those off our hands, and they provide essentially your entire military so I don’t think anyone else could honestly believe that either.”

“I wouldn’t expect a Jedi to understand,” Dooku replied. “The Confederacy’s member systems have concerns relating to over-centralization.”

Obi-Wan stared at him for a long moment.

“...no they don’t,” he said.

“I hardly think you can have earned your reputation as a negotiator, Kenobi, if you are so willing to be insulting,” Dooku said, archly.

“That’s not what I mean,” Obi-Wan replied. “I mean… yes, now the Republic has an army, though really it’s actually the Jedi’s army and we’re simply letting them borrow it, but four years ago the Galactic Republic was proverbially incapable of doing anything. It took emergency powers for the Chancellor to get the Republic to authorize having any kind of military whatsoever – and the only one available was the one you ordered. That’s not over-centralization.”

He drummed his fingers on his ‘saber. “And I note that I overheard Nute Gunray insisting on the head of Senator Amidala – literally, in those words – as his price for signing a treaty. But I still haven’t heard an actual answer. What does the Galaxy look like if the Confederacy wins?”

Dooku frowned, and after about three seconds Obi-Wan glanced at the Chancellor.

“Didn’t you discuss this at any point, your excellency?” he asked. “Count Dooku doesn’t seem to have thought about this.”

Palpatine blinked.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he repeated. “Shouldn’t you be fighting him?”

“It’s called diplomacy, Chancellor,” Obi-Wan replied, before returning his attention to Dooku. “Grandmaster, are you seriously telling me that you never thought about what you would do if you won?”

Anakin checked his comlink, for the time, then the ship trembled slightly.

“Artoo?” he asked. “Can you tell those ships outside to stop shooting at us and give us a wide berth? This could take hours and I don’t want to find out if my name’s literal.”

“Hours?” Palpatine repeated.

“He’s rolling,” Anakin replied, rolling his eyes. “Like I say, I’m used to this.”

He rummaged in a pocket of his robes, taking out a miniature toolkit, and began disassembling his lightsaber. “I’m pretty sure I can retune these crystals to give two stable configurations which it’ll snap between, that should give me a length toggle instead of a single adjustable length…”

“Are you taking your lightsaber apart?” Palpatine hissed. “What if you need to fight?”

“It’s okay, Chancellor, I’ll get about five minutes’ warning if the negotiations are going downhill,” Anakin replied. “That should be time to put it back together again…”

Palpatine looked up to Obi-Wan, who – sure enough – was still going.

“...of course, a separate but related issue is what it’s going to be like afterwards,” Obi-Wan said. “In principle the Republic and the Jedi Order could probably accept the existence of Sith so long as we actually knew who they were and they weren’t trying to destroy us. It’s the fact that the first Sith we met in a thousand years tried to run Anakin over and cut Qui-Gon’s head off as an opening move that’s soured us towards them a bit… but are you really going to be content as someone whose whole job is to die for Sidious?”

Dooku stared at Obi-Wan, baffled, then glanced at Palpatine and Anakin.

“What do you mean?” he asked, forcing his gaze back to Obi-Wan.

“Sidious is your Master, we know that much,” Obi-Wan replied. “Partly because you told me yourself. But has he ever put himself in danger? Or has it all been you dealing with Jedi like myself and my apprentice? Putting yourself out there, in danger, while you do exactly what he says?”

He smiled slightly. “A Jedi would accept that, but you’re a Sith – you’ve said so yourself. Sith are self-interested. What do you think your new master is getting out of the situation? Because if you don’t know, it’s got to be something and it’s probably something he doesn’t want to tell you.”

“My master is quite willing to put himself in danger,” Dooku said, then clamped his lips shut at a frantic mouthed shut up from Palpatine.

“Real or feigned?” Obi-Wan asked. “Do you think he wouldn’t manipulate you? He’s been doing it to everyone else – you’ve said it.”

Dooku’s brow furrowed.

“But we’re getting off topic,” Obi-Wan said, turning to look at Palpatine. “Chancellor, what about this as a starting point? Your emergency powers were granted to resolve the crisis, and I’m sure you want to abandon them as soon as possible… so why not take away the whole reason why the individual systems in the Confederacy had problems with the Republic to begin with? Freely allow the departure of any system which wishes to do so, under the emergency powers legislation; enact a progressive tax, one which hits the Core worlds harder owing to their greater ability to pay, to sustain a carrier based navy able to hunt pirates more effectively than conduct occupations or orbital bombardment, and have the navy established on a sector-federal two-level model?”

Palpatine stared at Obi-Wan for at least ten seconds.

“...he’s a Sith Lord,” he said, yet again.

“Oh, shut up,” Dooku replied. “You’re a Sith Lord and I don’t see you doing anything constructive.”

Obi-Wan glanced at Palpatine.

“...you know,” he began. “I’m quite sure you’d need to note that on your financial disclosure forms, your Excellency.”

He turned sideways, so he could see both Dooku and Palpatine at the same time. “What was the point of this whole abduction, anyway?”

“As it happens, I was supposed to kill you,” Dooku said. “It’s the only way to turn Anakin to the Dark Side, if you’re out of the way.”

“Huh?” Anakin asked. “Is something up? I’ve almost got the crystals realigned.”

“This plan looked a lot better this morning,” Palpatine muttered.

[roseaesynstylae]

A Collection of Posts about the Jedi Order, Part 2

Here's Part One. There's also My Favorites of Jedi Appreciation, which has my favorite Pro-Jedi fics and blogs.

Lightsabers

lightsabers and what they represent

jedi and kyber crystals

lightsaber dances

lightsaber dances 2

Anatomy of a lightsaber

Canon lightsabers

The lightsaber list

Lightsaber combat forms

lightsabers

Jedi Temple and Related Places

jedi temple and jedi art

jedi temple

Living Quarters in the Jedi Temple

Jedi High Council seating chart

Jedi Temple diagram

Interior shots of the Jedi Temple (game)

Force vergences

Ilum

The Jedi Temple Personal Quarters

Even more details about the Jedi Temple

Coruscant

Jedi Temple concept art

Miscellaneous

How Various Characters Experience the Force

Phirmists

Other Force-related faiths

Jedi reference

Jedi healing in the Clone Wars: Legends vs Canon

[wears-white-silk]

Reblogging to save. In case I ever write the fic floating in my head (lol sure.. it’s only been there for like 5 years already)

[beardedmrbean]

[theman]

I GOT A FUCKING RAISE THE POTATO WORKED WTF

[tattooedzombigirl]

This potato works. Every. Fucking. Time.

[imanutcase-10]

Then bring me luck

[thirddeadlysin]

the day after I posted this last time I was notified that I was selected for a really cool mentorship gig and got an unrelated glowing review at work

[jackdaw-kraai]

And notice the potato doesn’t guilt you with “if you don’t, something horrible will happen.” Potato wouldn’t betray you like that, because potato is a refined person of good humor and character, and understands that, sometimes, a visit to your dashboard just isn’t convenient right now. Sometimes you just went on a fandom gif reblogging spree or your energy is low, you do not have the time to make your dashboard suitable to guests, and a polite visit just isn’t in the cards. Potato understands this, and doesn’t get upset, or gods forbid, throws a tantrum and wishes ill on your household. Instead, Potato merely stores away their blessings for a later visit and leaves as a good friend should.

Be like Potato. Be a good friend.