HORNKUS BINGLEFUCK HCS PART FOUR ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
They're like. Lowkey stupid but it's not his fault guys he's from an alternate dimension (the education system there was the exact same but he still uses it as an excuse)
He can juggle but only balls so whenever he tells someone he can juggle and they hand him three random things to demonstrate he has to awkwardly tell them he can only do it with balls so everyone thinks he's lying but guys my pookie juggles really well just give him some balls :(
Are y'all seeing the double meaning here. He can't do shit in bed unless it's with males. They SUCK in bed. Double meaning there too haha.
He really likes poetry but they NEVER pick up on the undertones/deeper meanings of them. Like he's reading a poem about the abuse of women and showing everyone it and they're looking at him like "boy what"
In Denial final boss. He is demiromantic, pansexual and a demiboy who has days where they HATE hearing he/him but he completely denies it and dismisses it as them being infected by everyone else's queerness (they were already like that before even crossing paths with the rest of the gang)
He HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATES water and will only drink it out of his crusty musty dusty purple waterbottle from when they were seven (it has not been washed. Ever.)
Leading on from this, they are DISGUSTING. He sleeps in the clothes he's been wearing for the past week, they never change his bedsheets unless someone else does it for them, he leaves his dirty socks in every place possible (one was found in a trophy in a locked cabinet in the Hogwarts Trophy Room he's never once set foot in, nobody knows how)
He is gluten free but he claims they weren't back in his home dimension and it's something about this dimension's food (it's not, they just lowkey ignored it as a kid)
He cannot smoke. They thought it was soooo cool so he tried it once and then he immediately had a coughing fit and promptly threw up. They never tried it again.
At night he writes in one of those tween girl diaries that's pink and sparkly and says '𝓜𝔂 𝓢𝓮𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓓𝓲𝓪𝓻𝔂 ♡' on the front
He really hates all Disney movies apart from Cinderella (they had a crush on Prince Charming)
They're a certified misogynist. He will say the most horrific things about women and objectify the fuck out of them and then wonder why he's bitchless.
Love-hate relationship with Bartemius Crouchemius Junioremius but once it is revealed that they are lowkey alternate versions of each other the two get along terrifyingly well (everyone is scared because having two Barties something nobody would wish upon their worst enemy)
Genuinely thinks the plural of moose is 'meese' and will have full-blown arguments with people over it.
They have the most irritatingly long luscious thick lashes ever and all the girls hate him for it
They are so buns at Romance languages. English-speaking man can speak Cantonese but not French??? (No he's not part Chinese or anything they're Czech Caucasian)
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