FYI I have never recovered from this moment.
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FYI I have never recovered from this moment.
itâs a new day. things are looking up, uncle
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After my recent discovery of Park Heesoon, I found I no longer had a reason to put off starting All About My Romance and just..... Shin Hakyun's face???? SIR?????????????????????????????????????????? And lol at Chun Hojin also being in this, not me getting teary eyed over seeing them together again.
I haven't seen that one yet because I'm watching his works in chronological order BUT HIS LOOKS IN THAT ONE??!!! SIR indeed, like idk how I'm going to survive watching that show. HIS HAIR.
â€ïž swaglen â€ïž
I read the review by @convenientalias and I wanted to comment. I do not set myself the goal of overpersuading - everyone has the right to their point of view. Just to give my opinion on those things that the author of the review considers to be flaws. Because subjectively for me, it is the moral and psychological component that is the most valuable and wise in the drama.
First of all, yes - the theme of responsibility for oneâs actions is very strong in the drama. But I do not see cruelty in this. On the contrary, there is a lot of respect for the personality in it. The story is not at all about who is more to blame. It is in âBeyond Evilâ that the theme is very subtly and consistently promoted that a person is responsible for his misdeeds, first of all, to himself. And everyone except hopeless monsters like Jinmook and Khan Gihwan pay for their mistakes with personal pain. And this is not about karmic justice. Not about the assessment of the heroâs personality issued by an arrogant author. This is about the pain of losing oneself and of breaking off relations with loved ones. Yes, a person with a conscience can practically ruin his life just once driving drunk. This is not morality. This is a given of life.
And this is perhaps the main point that was missed in the review. The heroes do suffer not because they were guilty before the heavenly office. But because they could not save what they, personally, is dear and important. This is what makes guilt different from shame. Ultimately, guilt is the pain of betraying oneself. Everyone has their own sensitivity to these things. Someone can walk over corpses. Someone cannot sleep on a pea. But from what others will say âthis is just a peaâ it will not make him feel better.
About people with mental instability that they are allegedly discriminated against. In this drama, everyone is mentally unstable. And above all, the two main characters, both one step away from suicide or mental hospital. And the whole story is just dedicated to how they pull each other out of this abyss. One of the main crimes of Khan Gihwan is his treatment of a mentally unstable wife, driving her to suicide. And in the ending of the drama, Juwon comes to his motherâs grave, finally accepting her despite the pain. Where is the discrimination here? I do not see her. Quite the opposite.
About Park Jeonjae. I deeply sympathize with this hero. I grew up in a similar family and, it seems to me, I understand what he is whent through. But his fault is really great. Letâs go point by point.
1. Called the girl into the wilderness at night, not caring about her safety.
2. He quarreled with her like a capricious child and did not accompany her, when she left .
3. Got drunkÂ
4. Sat in this state behind the wheel
5. Having found the girlâs body, he did not call the ambulance or even Dongsik, but his mother.
6. Tried to forget what happened. Yes, exactly he tried, but did not forget. In states like Jeonjaeâs, the memories are not so much suppressed as the person seems to get used to not looking in that direction. He couldnât remember because he didnât want to remember, even to save his best friend.Â
In one book there is the phrase âcowardice is the worst of human vices.â I disagree that it is the worst. But many terrible things happen because of cowardice. Jeonjae is not paying the price for an unfortunate set of circumstances, but for his selfish cowardice.
Dongsik and Jeonjaeâs relationship is much more complicated than the âforgive - not forgiveâ question. Dongsik hurts for Jeonjae as we see it in his interrogation scene. But he canât be the one supporting Jeonjae anymore. Not because he is angry with him - I think that he is no longer angry - but because their relationship is too painful a knot that pulls both to the bottom. And this is a very psychologically literate moment. This is how codependency and exit from it work.
As for Jeonjaeâs mother ⊠I didnât believe in her motherâs love from the very beginning. She is actually a lot like Jinmook, only more complex and subtler. She practically killed her son and deserves to be punished along with the other âmonstersâ in the drama.
Judi Dench as Elizabeth I in Shakespeare in Love (1998)
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âBut time alone does not determine intimacy. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other and seven days are more than enough for others.â
Marianne Dashwood in Sense and Sensibility (1995)
no but if Dongsik was straight up in my face like this I would simply kiss him, itâs called meeting in the middle đ
hupâs bedridden binging: Â Â Â beyond evil
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i do not ghost purposely i just have no idea what to say ever
Welp, sounds like a great day to binge watch Beyond Evil again. đ€đ»
No lies detected.
Lmao youâre an adult, you shouldnât be using the word squick. Use trigger. Use your grown up adult words to explain how you feel instead of leaning on a cutesy uwu term that no one outside of tumblr uses. Itâs embarrassing.
Idek if this is serious or ironic honestly
#like...why use this baby word when you can just say how you feel about it
Found this in the original post tags and I just... SIGH
Hereâs the thing, anon. Squick isnât just âI donât like thisâ, itâs âI think this is gross and it makes me deeply uncomfortable but I pass no judgement on those who enjoy it, because I acknowledge that everyone is different and those same people may have the same visceral reaction some of the things I enjoyâ and was originally made popular in the kink community.
So yeah, if you want to say that every time you come across a trope or whatever you find icky then go ahead, say that every time.
Also, this term dates back to Usenet in the early nineties, so sure, go off.
This frustrates me so much because squicks and triggers are fundamentally different things and as someone with PTSD, the distinction is super useful!
Squicks are things I find personally gross but may not be gross to someone else. They donât upset me or provoke my PTSD, they simply do not pop my corn. Example: Omegaverse. I donât like it, it makes me uncomfortable and Iâm not going to read it, but if you like it, you do you.
Triggers are things which directly provoke my PTSD. This means that my triggers may seem completely normal and innocuous to someone else, because my triggers are so personal and intrinsically linked to a specific event in my life. My reactions to these triggers can include panic attacks and flashbacks to this traumatic event. Sometimes being triggered can affect me for several hours or even days.
Describing something as either a squick or a trigger allows me easily establish the difference in my potential reaction to something without having to go into painful detail about why bodily fluids might make me back button quickly but poker games might leave me a crying wreck.Â
Making this distinction, and having a specific word for something that is not your slice of pie, but also not an actual psychological trigger, is also REALLY important for making sure that the word âtriggerâ can retain its original, specific, purposeful, and collectively understood clinical meaning (both inside and outside online fannish communities).
If we encourage everyone to lump things that just make them slightly uncomfortable or simply arenât to their taste in under the word âtriggerâ, it actually dilutes the meaning of the word. It makes it harder for us all to, for the most part, collectively agree on and understand what exactly is being described when the word gets used.
And that destruction of shared precise definitions is a problem! It is really useful to have the communal language to be able to clearly and quickly delineate between âthis grosses me out, no thanksâ and âthis is going to set off a trauma episode, rattle my brain, and probably throw off the rest of my day/week as a resultâ while also maintaining your privacy, and to know that you will be understood in what you are saying. Not having it is actually detrimental to the effort of making our communities safe and navigable for people living with trauma. Which is a goal that is much more important to me, personally, than the idea of not being âcutesyâ (a word which in this case which sounds a lot like itâs being used as a euphemism for âcringeâ).
(Also, one has to wonder if people told Shakespeare he was being childish when he made up entirely new words that are still widely used in the English language today...... đ€)
My understanding is that âsquickâ was also created to avoid using more judgmental terms like âgrossâ or âdisturbingâ--like yeah, I do find X kink gross or disturbing, but thatâs my personal feeling, not an objective fact about the world, and if Iâm explaining to my friend who is super into X that Iâd prefer they leave it out of the story theyâre writing me in the fic exchange, I want to use politer language!
âSquickâ does sound silly, like onomatopoeia, but I think thatâs part of its role--itâs a word that defuses if, again, youâre saying something squicks you in front of an audience that may include its connoisseurs. When I say Iâm squicked, Iâm clearly not getting onto a high horse of dignity and moral righteousness. At the same time Iâm not being so indirect for the sake of politeness--âoh, itâs not my favorite thing, Iâm not sure it works for me, I havenât found a fic about it that clicks for meâ--that someone could misunderstand how much I do not want to see it.
And, to reiterate, it is a grown up word made by grown up nerds in the 90s so if you think it was somehow born on and limited to Tumblr I'm going to need you to actually do some fandom history research before you ever speak authoritatively again about anything fandom-related or adjacent.
I love and deeply miss the term âsquickâ and really want to see it brought back. It allows dislike for its own sake and without judgement. Itâs polite, gentle, and has an air of âyou do you.â A squick is not a trigger. Triggers are related to trauma. Youâre allowed to not like things and not have them related to anything other than just finding them unpleasant. And that aversion can be strong! Thatâs okay! I really donât like watersports. Like, gag-reflex levels of aversion, but itâs not triggering. I just really donât like it. I feel like weâve lost the right/ability to just... quietly not like things and move on with our lives. Not everything is for everyone, and you donât need a reason to not like something. Just politely and quietly excuse yourself. No need to draw attention, and if someone asks you why you just say, âNo, it squicks me out.â No judgement. No narrative necessary.Â
There is a sad trend of trying to make everything you personally dislike morally reprehensible in some way to justify your dislike of it. You're allowed to just not like something for no real reason. You do not have to justify why you dislike something, and the word "squick" is perfect for that. It say "look I really really don't like this thing, but it's ok if you do" and that is useful.
I think the biggest problem is that a lot of these kids are VERY into the whole fandom purity culture thing, so they actually DO want to make it out to be morally reprehensible, and they DON'T think it's ok that other ppl might be into it.
Cheerfully using âsquickâ since 1992, because it means a specific thing and other words do not mean that thing.
I am home from visiting my brother! It was super fun. Also, we got a bunch of Korean food and soju out in New Malden, so that was a good time. How is everyone doing?