The Untold Story

Travel fanatic. Hardcore Ambivert. Explorer. Book junkie. Tea advocate. Wildlife Photographer. Journalist. Dreamer.

[catchymemes]

[catchymemes]

[catchymemes]

[only-cat-memes]

Your daily dose of cat memes

[gaystation4]

[therisingking]

HELLO?????

[catchymemes]

[m4ge-deactivated20210331]

a quick step by step guide on what to do if you come back to your apartment and find yourself locked out because your front door is frozen shut

kick the bottom of the door for 10 minutes

text your landlord

remember your landlord is on vacation and also in her mid 50′s so it takes about 36 hours to receive a response

briefly wonder why the fuck you moved the canada

remember that college tuition is significantly cheaper here than in the united states 

look up and notice your cat is at the window, staring at you. he paws at the window lightly and meows. it’s devastating. his eyes are so big and imploring. decide that you have to get inside your apartment at all costs. not even god himself can stop you from feeding your cat his chicken wet food dinner. frida kahlo herself could descend from the heavens and ask “hey you wanna bang?” and you’d say “hell yeah but first let me open this door so i can feed my cat his dinner”

remember there is a starbucks 3 blocks down the street from you

enter. the barista gives you a weird look for entering a starbucks at 7pm on a tuesday

order a venti cup of hot water. you order in french because the barista just said “bonjour” instead of “bonjour, hi.” you have a strong american accent. you hit the r in merci a little too hard to compensate. you embarrass yourself.

exit the starbucks clutching the massive cup of hot water in your hands. it’s burning your fingers.

return. methodically pour the starbucks cup of water all over the the door frame. it begins moving a little but still wont open

back up

ensure your doc martens are properly gripping the sheet of ice covering the ground. many people have told you to stop wearing doc martens in the winter, despite your protests that theyre actually the ideal winter boot. also, you’re a lesbian and punk’s not dead

release a pterodactyl screech and sprint towards the door, slamming the full force of your pathetically tiny 5′2″ 110lb body into it

you dont know any of your neighbors so you dont care about maintaining your pride anyways

the door swings open

run up the stairs

open the actual door to your apartment and yell MOMMY’S HOME MY LITTLE BITCHASS BABY BOY DONT WORRY at your cat

cat flings his body to the ground and starts purring like he does every time you come home

write tumblr post

[homoslovenc]

this has a better plot than 90% of action movies

[catchymemes]

[catchymemes]

[sovietnam]

[tea-and-taiko]

Text box: “You’re ... an intriguing woman. Come with me (and join our company)!”

[maxofs2d]

you ever think about how “mountain dew” is a really poetic name and how, if someone didn’t know what it was, they’d probably guess “some herbal tea made from the finest leaves of the Alps”. but instead, it’s just, radioactive gamer soda

[thydungeongal]

adding “mountain dew” into my list of elven names alongside “morningwood”

[everythingfox]

cats are cats

[yarrowthewitch]

"This crystal is good for such-and-such organ!" oh yeah name 3 of that organ's functions

[yarrowthewitch]

"This will cleanse your body of toxins" Oh? Which ones? What are their names? Why are they bad for you? What symptoms do they cause?

[halibellecter]

This is the only good addition to this post

[emotion-deluxe]

No offense but where are the male porn bots

[calellon]

..and where are all the gods?

[tokentrans]

where’s the streetwise Hercules to fight the rising odds?

[laylamva]

Isn’t there a white guy to clutter up my feed?

[glassmirrormask]

Late at night I scroll and I block and I dream of what I need

[sarakouda]

I need a manwhore! 💥💥💥💥

[emotion-deluxe]

Can someone PLEASE answer my question

[beardedmrbean]

[rockshitty]

Gandalf throwing his staff at gollum is what really makes this

[captain-snark]

Thank you for commenting because I was going to scroll past this. 

[only-cat-memes]

Your daily dose of cat memes

[catceleste]

question for any entomologists out there: if bumblebees were of a comparable size to, say, a kitten, would they enjoy resting in my lap while i gently comb their fuzz with a barbie brush? i know that i would enjoy that but i hope they would as well.

[bluecanarry]

hi! as an entomologist who specializes in bumble bees— my answer is probably yes! many, if not all insects groom themselves as a way to keep clean and to keep their senses sharp, but in societies of insects (specifically bees) we see them groom each other, and colonies of bees who have more allogrooming are typically stronger and healthier! these bees who groom others are integral to the colony, and we see grooming in other social insects like termites as well, specifically in relation to the queen. you might have more luck with a flea comb than a barbie brush, just to really mimic the feeling of them and others grooming it, but i like to think they would enjoy being cleaned and pampered :)

[bixbythemartian]

preserving your tags here smileyystickers: #this is the best post actually#bumble bees are notably very docile too and i think they would quite enjoy curling up in your lap on a cold day#i could go more into detail but in this hypothetical scenario i think they would like it 

also best possible answer or BEST POSSIBLE ANSWER??? also I’m not OP but I would BEG for you to go into more detail

[bunjywunjy]

if you’re into that, giant wasps would also likely enjoy being petted since they groom themselves and each other the same way :)