how to get out of your own way

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how to get out of your own way
One thing I love in the phm book is when rocky is explaining how old he is and how long he's been in space for and while being amazed grace is also like "wait so this is EARTH units right like you're literally 291 EARTH YEARS old?!" and rocky's just casually like yeah you're shit at maths so I convert everything to your weird units now you're welcome
Project Hail Mary - Phil Lord & Christopher Miller
I do feel a bit sorry for people who only read the book after the film was out. Not because the film is bad (it's amazing!) or because the book is better (they're both amazing!). But because I had a very specific experience reading the book that basically no-one can ever have again.
The blurb of the book Does Not Mention Rocky. It only sets up the premise that Grace wakes up on the ship with amnesia and big problems to solve. I went into the book expecting it to be The Martian but in space (which, to be clear, I was looking forward to). One guy on his own, solving cool science problems - it's a great genre and I was happy for more.
And the book absolutely starts off as The Martian in space, with real and practical science problems. Then, gradually, clues trickle in about the astrophage situation and it's revealed that there's an alien organism involved. Having that overt sci-fi concept introduced as the story progresses is such a dramatic and exciting development!
AND THEN. FULLY A THIRD OF THE WAY INTO THE BOOK, he encounters an actual alien spaceship!!! That surprise is the single best twist and reveal I've ever read. Coming from The Martian and the very grounded and realistic way that Weir writes science made it SO much more exciting than just going into it expecting an aliens story.
I do understand why the film introduced Rocky earlier in the story, because there's only so much they could fit in and it made sense to prioritise him. And I understand why they showed him in the trailer and marketing for the film, because he's obviously a very significant part of it. But that all means that no-one reading or watching it from now on can really get to experience the incredible delight I had when Rocky was revealed in the book. It was so so good.
james ortiz provided some of his own personal rocky backstory on the sag aftra podcast, transcribed by me because we all have to be miserable about it together.
link to the podcast, this section below is from timestamp 24.35
“andy weir provided a packet to the creature shop that was like a packet of eridian biology and stuff but there wasn’t much about eridian culture or eridian sociology and i made a bunch of choices going in because i just needed to have like a ‘who am i?’ right?
[…] and i made a decision that rocky’s species, that eridians are really social animals that in fact are like a beehive or a pod of dolphins - it’s a unique and really integrated ecosystem of everybody doing their [specific] part. and the fact that rocky had to fly that ship for about 45 years - longer than grace has been alive, i wanna point that out - he’s been alone on that ship, having to run that by himself and- ryan and i would talk about that, one day we sat down and he was like “so what’s the movie from rocky’s perspective?” and i was like “oh it’s like ‘alien’, […] like he’s in a ‘contagion’ movie by himself and he has no idea what’s going on.”
he’s basically in castaway by himself which of course ryan is too but like, one reason why we never cut to the past of rocky is like, i think it was really horrifying! i don’t think rocky has slept in however many years and so a thing i was really struggling with is this idea of like “rocky must watch sleep” because how do you make that a need as opposed to like, a cute idea? and i just had to make the decision that […] he has a lot of unprocessed trauma around the things that he doesn’t understand and how much he is blaming himself because he’s the guy who fixes, he’s the guy who fixes and there was something really freeing about deciding that rocky was a deeply emotional, deeply anxious, deeply horrified person - being - that is trying to move through that in some way and how that affects the early scenes with him until there’s a point in the story where you can see we’ve physically softened rocky’s behaviour, because he’s finally feeling more safe and ok but all of that lore, all of that information [was essential].
i also decided, this is just a small nerdy thing, that there was actually some of his family, was on that ship too.”
I love how hard they committed to having the light source/s outside the ship spin while the centrifuge is active. I didn't even register that's what was happening the first time I watched, and I was kind of confused why they had such weirdly overdramatic lighting with no explanation.
but once I figured it out!! yes, the entire universe outside of the ship is rotating every few seconds. and yes, if there's a bright star or planet nearby that would cause a very disorienting cycle between bright light and total dark. and that's just what life would be like there!!! no apologies, no mitigation, not even any direct explanation for the audience. they just made it real and accepted the consequences
look at this one:
that's about SEVEN SECONDS of unexplained total darkness, in the middle of a full-face shot of the main character during the emotional climax of the film!!!
k but imagine Rocky wanting to learn about how humans became the apex predators of their planet so he has Grace “hunt” him in the biodome as an experiment and during it he thinks Grace isn’t trying or taking it seriously which is bad bad bad because this is for research purposes
only for Rocky to get more and more tired as the experiment goes on just to realize that Grace isn’t which makes him panic so he puts as much distance as he can between them and finds a (hopefully) safe spot to sleep and when he wakes up the human is crouching over him like “got youuu” and Rocky has never shrieked so damn loud before in his life
Rocky on the trip back to Erid registering that Grace has defaulted to using he/him for him for sexism reasons and that they don't actually have to go by he/him. xe does some research on the human computer and spends several weeks cycling through different pronoun sets. starts switching so frequently Grace becomes convinced sie has started being difficult on purpose. after a while Grace is like omg will you just pick one and stick with it. Rocky is like okay i have decided. rock/rocks. rockself. Grace like well i can't argue with that.
#see the hill that I will die on is that if Andy weir was cooler rockey would use either they them or xe xir#you’re telling me cool middle school teacher Ryland grace is unfamiliar with the concept of fun new genders#absolutely not. his students have taught him about singular they them and neopronouns
Grace trying to explain to Rocky that they can be whatever they want to be and presenting a whole list of different pronoun options and Rocky (who has no concept of gender) being like 'why would I care about any of this'
Rocky: which pronouns does Grace use question?
Grace: he/him
Rocky: okay. Rocky will use he/him too
Grace: okay but I feel like defaulting to he/him promotes a patriarchal kind of mindset and we should be more thoughtful about it
Rocky: okay so use the other standard pronouns
Grace: she/her?
Rocky: yeah
Grace: okay but that feels weird too
Rocky: why weird question
Grace:
Grace, later, lying awake: I never considered that Rocky might wanna be a she... Am I a bad person?
Rocky: Grace mix it up suggestion
Grace: I guess I could
Rocky: Rocky he/she/they/it
Grace: I don't know if you can use it
Rocky: why not question
Grace: it's just considered dehumanising?
Rocky:
Rocky, being a little shit: I choose it/its
Rocky: this conversation boring, let's go back to Grace tones
Grace: okay so you won't pick a pronoun but I have to pick a tonal inflection?
Rocky: my thing more important statement
Grace: okay fine can't you just your tones for me?
Rocky: but Grace not qualified engineer
Grace: well is there a schoolteacher tone?
Rocky: uhh no
Rocky: schoolteacher not
Rocky: schoolteacher not prestige profession statement
Grace:
Grace: WOW.
Grace: is there not like a default tone to use when you don't know all this stuff about a person?
Rocky: yes but very rude to use for close friend statement
Grace: wait hold up 🤔 you think of me as a close friend?
Rocky: yes maybe Grace shut up now
Grace several years into their voyage, finally getting good enough at understanding Eridian to clock when Rocky has switched back to using the Neutral Tone for him, thereby implying that they are no longer friends: HEY??
Grace, in the middle of a big argument: did you just. dead person inflection me?
Rocky: uh-huh
Grace: does that mean what I think it means
Rocky: it means what it means statement
Grace: come ON
Project Hail Mary (2026) dir. Phil Lord & Chris Miller
Project Hail Mary // Incorrect quotes 3/?
Bonus:
i like when eridians describe grace in other-worldly, incorporeal, eldritch ways. that he's beautiful and terrifying at the same time. a horror you can't look away from because you don't want to miss a thing.
you can never get a clear listen to him. his primary sense node is covered in "hair" and the part that isn't is hidden by two crystals that refract sound waves in a pleasing but disorienting way. he covers his body in billowy cloth at all times. not snug and sensible and unobstructive like eridian coverings, but loose and layered, draped and flowing.
the most clear part of him are his internal organs. because yes, the alien's carapace isn't sound-proof. his single heart beats insistingly in his core, his lungs exchanging gas constantly, his long digestive tract always bubbling and contracting. his thorax is packed impossibly tight and it's all moving and singing.
and it shouldn't be possible, with how fragile he is, for that internal pressure to maintain. how does the thin membrane of his external organ (another horror that sends eridians reeling) keep it all contained? his "skin" is so easily pierced, cut, bruised, burnt, how does he not split open under his own mass?
when savior rocky first arrived home and described the environmental needs of his alien, the scientists thought he'd made a mistake in his frantic panic to get everything out. it isn't possible this being lives at such low atmospheric pressure, at half the gravity, and in a gas that's nearly double the weight of ammonia. in a gas so dangerous, so caustic. and if it does then how is it obligately terrestrial like rocky claims? shouldn't it fly or float instead? (and then to see it in the water, learning that it can float or sink at will.)
and this alien has come bearing gifts that will not only save your species but launch it into impossible heights of technological and intellectual advancement. he has discovered the solution to astrophage and bred it to thrive on threeworld and translated his instructions into eridian. he has given your people the complete sum of his people's knowledge, advanced in ways the eridians can't believe and behind in ways that seem ludicrous. and he has given his life for your people to have these things.
he knows how your solar system was formed. he knows how the universe started.
his name means beautiful and generous and relieving.
the eridians experiencing cosmic bliss.
be not afraid.
PROJECT HAIL MARY 2026, dir. Phil Lord & Christopher Miller
When You Look at Dr. Grace
part 1/2 (part 2)
When You Look at Dr. Grace
(part 1) part 2/2
PROJECT HAIL MARY by Andy Weir
@pscentral event 49: literature
probably one of the reasons why i love phm so much is that it's a movie literally about the merits of platonic love and platonic soulmates. enough of these stupid romance movies gimme two characters whose friendship fucking saved both their planets, and who love each-other so fucking much that they would sacrifice themselves for the other over and over again. finally, a movie that shows that all love is powerful, not just that between romantic partners.
I love Carl's introduction. It's such a great establishing moment.
Ryland Grace has made it all the way to his bike with Eva Stratt at his heels, so her trusted security team has correctly assessed it's time to move in the cars, and Carl is approaching off-screen.
Grace comes out of the little "I don't know why that makes me such a nut!" rant, and there Carl is, stepping up into frame exactly next to Stratt. Tall, broad, unimpressed, unmistakably a force to be reckoned with, unmistakably a trusted professional.
But also a nameless goon at this point. An extension of the threat Stratt seems to represent to Grace. A depersonalized tool.
Grace clocks the cars, his presence, the unfolding situation, instantly and incredulously. And he does something clever, something he always does, which is to call attention to the absurdity of the unspoken threat by trying to force the situation into a normal mold.
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name."
Turning Eva's nameless goon into a person with agency. Trying to force a relationship that hinders coercion.
Ideally, this would force them all to acknowledge how abnormal they are acting and retreat a little to keep up the appearance of normality. Or admit to what they are doing by refusing. Either way, the ball shifts out of Ryland's court into theirs.
Neither happens, though.
Carl sees exactly what he's trying to do with that and interrupts him mid-question. "Carl." And then keeps staring at him the same way as before. One word, and we already know so much about him.
He is not a nameless goon. He is an individual named Carl.
And he fully supports what is happening there. Because nothing is normal and it's stupid to pretend that what is happening isn't happening.
So yes, while he bonds with Grace over silliness and is the astrophage-coparent and instigator of Carl's Hypothesis... he is also entirely introduced to us as the man who will wish Grace the best of success on the mission while he's being sedated on the ground. Because Carl has a personal opinion about what is at stake.
"Sun's really dying, isn't it?"
"Yeah."