bloodstainedshackles:
it starts with a seed || nyb & ran
Using the lengthy shadows cast by the tall plants as cover from the blazing sun overhead, as well as from the prying eyes of any passersby, Nyb crouched by the shop, unable to focus on anything around him. The torment he was subjected to by the sneering demons, which were invisible and yet dreadfully loud in his head, became the sole focus of his attention. Reminding him of innocent lives he’d taken, laughing at the emotional weakness in him that left him roiling in turmoil after each and every grisly job, scorning him for not being more like the heartless beast that he kept caged within.
Screeching at him to get over his self-pity party and carry out the task he’d been most recently assigned.
“I can’t…” Rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, hands clasped over his ears as if it would somehow reduce the cacophony inside, tears streamed down his face as these hopeless words escaped his throat in a whimper. “I can’t… I can’t I can’t I can’t. I don’t… want… to… It’s too much. This is… too far… and I can’t…”
Choking sobs racked his body as he went around in such repetitive, nonsensical circles. It was the kind of job that shook the hardened killer to his core. Well, “hardened” was a strong word. He distanced himself from it. If he didn’t do that, he’d have lost his sanity long ago. However, the task being thrust upon him now was not one he could simply hold his breath for and have it done in the blink of an eye, and it was because of that that his whole being revolted against the idea.
It would destroy him, and he would no longer be Nyb. Instead, he’d just become the same kind of emotionless monster that lurked inside of him. Or at least, that was his fear, and he refused to let it come to pass.
But while he was shaking there, lost in his fears, suddenly a voice spoke up. It wasn’t the demons, because it came from outside - that is, a physical being had asked him a question. And, lifting his head, he saw that it was a girl, whose embroidered apron distinguished her as an employee of the shop.
Realizing that, despite his efforts, he’d been seen, he also had to accept that he could no longer stay here. At least, not looking like he did. Already, he’d attracted too much attention like this.
“Uh…” Slowly, he rose to his feet as he took a moment to gather his scattered thoughts. “I’m uh… Yeah, I’ll be okay. I just had a rough day at work.” Technically, it wasn’t a lie, he supposed. “Sorry, am I in the way here?”
He looked pale, definitely shaken. Something definitely must have happened, but everyone had those days. She could remember plenty of times where a student had a breakdown. She was the type of person who couldn’t leave someone alone like that, and had always done her best to sit with them and soothe them until they felt better. Sometimes it took a cup of tea, talking about literally anything other than what was bothering them, but eventually, they’d calm down.
“It happens,” Ran smiled sympathetically. “Some days are worse than others.” She supposed she was lucky in that regard. Not everyone got work in a peaceful little flower shop. But honestly, it was a good place to try and gather yourself again. “No, you’re fine. I just saw you while I was watering plants and wanted to make sure you were okay.”
She thought for a moment, tilting her head slightly. “If you’d like, there’s a sitting area in the back. It’s shaded and a nice breeze blows through there. Ah, there’s the koi pond too.” It might help, at least, to sit in a more comfortable, calming place. She liked to sit there sometimes when she felt a little overwhelmed. The soft tinkle of the windchimes always helped to ground her and put her at ease once more.
Of course, it had been little help when she’d spent several hours out there after she’d agreed to join Yuuka’s clan and it really sank in that she’d agreed to be an idol of all things. But, well, that was a completely different situation than this.
“Do you want some tea or water, maybe?”
