Valkyrie's Corner

It is I, the dictator of the Scrambled Eggs Universe; jack-of-all-fandoms, master of none. Welcome to a place of puns and weird ramblings.

[cikero]

tried to take a picture of a firefly that landed on my hand but it flew away

[cikero]

#MYNOTHING

[writeofthevalkyries]

wouldn’t have believed it if you hadn’t shared the pic damn

[homunculus-argument]

Scenario: you're put in the same room as the person that your 15-year-old self thought that they would be at your current age. How does it go?

[writeofthevalkyries]

oh my god I’m face to face with my own dead body

[what-even-is-thiss]

ok but why does everyone like olive oil so much anyways, it’s like. the worst one I’ve had I’m pretty sure

It tastes really good and has lots of vitamins and healthy fats in it. Not that complicated.

[writeofthevalkyries]

If you’re not hungry enough to eat olive oil, don’t fret. You can have some of oil for now and have some more later.

[homunculus-argument]

Hey idk who needs this but helpful reminder that "virgin blood" in any witchcraft shit that requires that means "virgin" in the same sense as "virgin hair" means hair that hasn't been dyed or processed in any way, natural in the default sense. So no, "virgin blood" doesn't mean blood from a virgin, just blood that hasn't been used for any other kind of witchy shit earlier.

Whether nor not someone has fucked before is completely irrelevant. Any act of fucking doesn't instantly make someone contaminated or un-magic any of their shit. You're just not supposed to re-use blood for blood magic. That's just not. Just do not. Like that's just weird who does that.

[writeofthevalkyries]

reduce reuse recycle

[theblackparadeisdead]

One day ur a suicidal 15 year old and then suddenly you wake up and you're 22 years old and genuinely debating the merits of iceberg vs romaine lettuce in the salad ur making. Life goes on ig

[writeofthevalkyries]

the choice is immaterial either one could be accompanied by explosive diarrhea

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sometimes I think that I ought to write an epic poem about a piece of American history or something but then I remember that I hate writing in iambic pentameter and I’m not a hyper nationalist and also that sounds like a lot of work

[writeofthevalkyries]

Double dactyls are usually used to make fun of something and could work against you looking like a nationalist and also aren’t in iambic pentameter

[what-even-is-thiss]

You know when I was a teen with braces my chemistry teacher told me that she stopped wearing her retainer because she would take it off in her sleep and throw it across the room every night and I remember thinking yeah right that’ll never happen to me

Well guess why I had to stop wearing my retainer last year

[writeofthevalkyries]

mouth full of bees

[byjove]

suspicious…

[byjove]

there are apparently a lot of mushrooms that are poisonous to some people and edible for others. unlike food allergies, it’s not an allergic immune reaction, it’s mushroom poisoning but only for some people

[byjove]

edibility is FAFO

[writeofthevalkyries]

forbidden (?) snack

[what-even-is-thiss]

Honestly my ideal Minecraft base that I always find the most fun to work on is an increasingly complex series of rooms and tunnels carved into the side of a hill.

[writeofthevalkyries]

this and House Disguised As Tree

[frontmansdefender]

I aspire to be as passionate about something as this guy and the orcas are passionate about hating the sunfish

In the sunfish’s defense!!!!!

[writeofthevalkyries]

The one thing this thread is missing is a good picture of a sunfish, which I found for you on oceansunfish.org (a real website).

[dittography-direwolf]

Totally normal for a legitimate for-profit company to refuse to reclaim or stop running their products even after they're no longer being paid to do so. I'm sure it's very normal to just keep running your service for free when your contract's been terminated. Spending money to continue running cameras that supposedly no one is looking at is definitely not an indicator they are just run by the federal government to spy on everyone and only a wacko conspiracy theorist would think so.

[not100bees]

"if somebody gave birth in your house would you let them stay there?" Well first of all America is a bit bigger than my house. Like if there was a person who was proportionate to the Continental United States like I am to my house I feel like we have bigger problems than birthright citizenship.

[writeofthevalkyries]

Okay but also… if someone was living in my house and gave birth then of course the baby would be allowed to stay??

[nohoperadio]

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

[writeofthevalkyries]

op just obliterated boy pigeon’s reputation

[writeofthevalkyries]

me playing 20 questions (but i don’t know how the game works): how do you keep from ruminating on the thousands of small regrets over the course of your life that haunt you but you can do nothing to fix them?

[sunderwight]

The problem with studying the deep ocean is that humans need light to look at things, the depths of the ocean are extremely dark, and what lives there is accustomed to spending most of its time in that darkness. So when we go down there with submersibles and turn on Big Lights to see, we invariably and dramatically alter what's going on, in the same way that it's generally difficult to observe the natural behaviors of terrestrial animals if you whip out a megaphone and shout HEY GUYS WHAT ARE YOU DOING at them first.

[writeofthevalkyries]

How else do you expect us to get them to tell us what they are doing

[writeofthevalkyries]

brb new suicidal ideation just dropped

[str-ngeloop]

we desperately need sex 2

[writeofthevalkyries]

Have you tried brushing someone’s hair