WTTT Incorrect Quotes

Incorrect quotes of everyone's favorite anthropomorphized states

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Florida: If I can't cause tiny bits of chaos every day, I think my body will shut down.

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Florida: Safe Space, you’re offered 500,000 dollars, but, if you accept it, the person you hate the most in the world gets 1,000,000 dollars. Would you take it?

California: Of course! I mean, why wouldn’t I want 1,500,000 dollars?

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Florida: You have any sunscreen?

California: You can't get a sunburn from a bonfire—

Florida: It's for my marshmallow ya dummy.

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Gov: Who else is hiding in the laundry room trying to listen to California and Texas's conversation?

Florida: Me. I'm in the laundry basket.

Louisiana: I'm in the washing machine.

Greg: I'm in the closet.

Florida: We accept you, Greg. <3

Greg: No, I'm literally in the closet.

Florida: Love is love <3

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Greg: "29-34 Give a particular ecosystem and explain how could it be protected."

Greg: Help.

California: Forests, stop cutting down trees and don't hold gender reveal parties anywhere near them.

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Alaska: The salary of a clown is 51,000 dollars.

Alaska, gesturing to California and Texas fighting: And yet these idiots do it daily, and for free!

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Florida: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

California: No, that's not how you make cookies.

Louisiana: FLOOR IT!!

Florida: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!?

California: yOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN-

Florida: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES!

Louisiana: DO IT!

California: NO-

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California: Not to be NSFW but I want someone to hold me while I sleep.

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Florida: That sounds super! Doesn’t that sound super, New York?

New York: No.

Florida: I think I speak for New York when I say it sounds really super.

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Gov: I left instructions for everyone while I'm gone.

Florida: Mine just says "Florida, no!"

Gov: I want you to apply it to every possible situation.

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Texas: Helpful grammar tip: "farther" is for physical distance, "further" is for metaphorical distance, and "father" is for emotional distance!

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Florida: Yum, thanks!

Kidnapper: *Puts more tape over his mouth* I said stop eating it.

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Gov: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?

Hawai'i: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

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Florida: Thanks for not telling Gov what happened.

California, dumbfounded: I wouldn’t even know where to begin trying to explain this.

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Gov: For self defense reasons, I'm going to pretend to be a burglar and you guys have to act wisely.

Greg, California, & Florida: Okay.

Gov: If you don't want to die, give me all of your money.

Greg: Bold of you to assume I have money.

California: Bold of you to assume I don't want to die.

Florida: Bold of you to assume I can die.

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Florida: I think we should have glow stick juice injected in our bones when we're born, so if we break our bones, we get a fun surprise.

Louisiana: What's the surprise?

CDC: Blood poisoning.

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California: You know, I think my life has value.

Florida: Who are you and what have you done with California?!