Oof ouch my bones

I am the embodiment of the energy that the pokemon wurmple gives off. No further questions.

[markovchaingang]

you guys do realise walking doesn't actually move you anywhere right? it just destroys you entirely and places a perfect copy of you right in front of where you were standing

[wurmple-kin]

I see Zeno is back with fresh new ideas.

[voldemo]

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

[voldemo]

its like ive never seen herbivore

[ezekestiel]

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away

[stupidestasshole]

every time you revlog this post, a new baby spider is born #miracleoflife

[spacenintendogs]

i'm the same age as fox mccloud during star fox adventures!!

[snwlvl-deactivated20240125]

capitalism breeds innovation

[ferrumanulum]

Yeah that will do it.

[citric-crow]

improved

[simplyghosting]

Tags via @bookdragon1811

[syphabelnyades]

[ashed13]

@theunknowngrowshere

[otherworldlyflameorb]

I'm not sorry this is funny

[ashed13]

MR PRESIDENT! THEY HIT THE SECOND ELECTRICAL OUTLET!

[eldest-daughter-syndrome]

[camerahoax]

men got a taste of women's beauty standards and immediately started bashing their facial bones with hammers

[aceynk]

notice how it's everyone's birthday today

[spookedstarzz]

got that dog in me and mitski has been showing financial interest in it

[beemovieerotica]

[cairviecorvi]

[skarchomp]

the fantasy lesbian adventurer is immune to the seductive evil sorceress's feminine wiles because she's butch4butch

[maxknightley]

this is exactly why any evil sorceress worth her salt keeps a towering knightgirl in gleaming black armor "on retainer"

[maxknightley]

well it's one of two reasons anyway

[80slesbiab]

Kate McKinnon getting her hair pulled by THE pornstar Nina Hartley

[marciereynard]

she’s just like me fr

[tumblingoverstars]

i just got summoned for yuri duty

[slutstarlet]

[sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog]

me to my brother after one too many coors lights on a friday.

[yorgen-sh]

[venndaai]

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

[venndaai]

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

[fluorescentbrains]

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

[muffinlance]

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Eye-opening research: Greenland sharks maintain vision for centuries through DNA repair mechanism

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

[spacenintendogs]

pigma dengar of star fox (2026), the man that u are....