xandie-ix @xandie-ix - Tumblr Blog

Women in France are fighting to wear the hijab while women in Iran are fighting to not wear the hijab

This is not a fight about Islam this is not a fight about religion this is a fight about women not having the right to do whatever they want with their bodies and being killed and persecuted for it

ackermelon

Erwin Smith’s favorite cookie is oatmeal raisin.

YES.

Upon finding this out, barely a few days after leaving the underground, Levi considered going back.

These are a fraction of the thoughts that were going through Levi's head the day he found out about Erwin's cookie preference:

He stood in the corner of Erwin's office, watching the latter drink his tea with fucking oatmeal raisin cookies. Yes, oatmeal raisin. This menace. This... This disgrace to society.

Of course he loves raisins. Mr. I send soldiers to their deaths every now and then, Mr. I have my own office to plan how to send those soldiers to their deaths every now and then.

Oatmeal was fine, but raisins? Unacceptable. Disgusting. Might as well lick Pixis's bald head. They used to torture people in the underground by forcing them to ingest raisins. Levi shivered at the memory.

Erwin saw Levi glaring daggers at him, sending him silent death threats from the corner of the room, and offered him a cookie, assuming Levi was just hungry.

Levi's look of pure disgust made Erwin take his offer back, a shiver going down his spine, suddenly afraid of what the other man might do to him. Levi considered emptying his stomach over Erwin's plate, but he preferred co-existing with raisin cookies than going back to the underground, though he would never admit to it.

For the next few months, Levi would buy Erwin a box of chocolate chip cookies instead of those that shall not be named, and Erwin, quite fond of the little man, would eat them all despite not liking chocolate.

He still snuck in a box of raisin cookies every now and then, that is, until Levi found out. He sniffed it out the second he walked in to his office, making Erwin hand it over to him. Levi wouldn't even agree to feeding it to the cats, so he gave it to Pixis instead.

And that is how Erwin started liking chocolate, fearing Levi's wrath if he were to ever bring raisins into their life again.

memecrazyrich

raggeddypond

Buffy the Vampire Slayer → Buffy barging into Spike’s crypt (updated)

mdrambles

The Approaches to Examining a Toddler: Tactical Tips for Toddlerology

The “Parent First” or “Watch [Parent] Do It” Strategy: employing the philosophy of having a taster for monarchs because if [parent] does not die after you look in their mouth then it must be okay.

The “Toy Checkup” Strategy: only useful if the kiddo brought their own toy, generally, but kind of fun to show them how you will listen to their chest or check their ROM or look in their ears… (can be combined with the “You Try” strategy–see below)

The “You Try” Strategy: Hand over your stethoscope or your otoscope or reflex hammer or tongue depressor or whatever. Let them touch it and understand it’s not threatening. (WARNING: Toddlers are gross and indiscriminate with their bodily fluids, so be prepared for an unexpected goober/booger/vomit and ALWAYS, ALWAYS clean/dispose between patients!). If going for combo of “Toy Checkup” + “You Try” or “You Try” + “Parent First”, show the kiddo how to do the maneuver for their turn, then it is your turn to check on them, etc.

The “Taking Advantage of Developmental Imagination” Strategy: Stethoscope = special heart, lung, and tummy telephone. Otoscope = lava checker/sucker; otoscopy = checking for [cute or silly thing] inside ears (I tend to accompany this with, “Hello? Are any [cute/silly thing(s)] home? Nope! No one is home. Maybe they’re on the other side?”). Abdo exam = “Did you eat [silly thing]? Maybe I can find it in your tummy!”, or “Did you know that your tummy is also a drum? Listen here! *proceed to percuss*”, or “Where are the [silly/cute thing(s)] hiding in your tummy? Let’s find them…”

The “FOMO” Strategy: Younger kiddos often want what their older siblings have… if you’ve got a cooperative older sibling, examine them first with the little one watching. They usually want what their older siblings have, so they might even be eager for their turn to have their ears checked…

The “Sound Effects” Strategy: Anything you need to palpate or make general contact with in the toddler’s sphere of personal space should have a sound effect. Personally, I’m a fan of “boop boop”. Other kids really like singing and music…

The “Kindasorta Bribing” Strategy: …this one I find is pretty hit-or-miss, but sometimes the thought of a reward will get a bit of cooperation. Always remember that our little friends love stickers.

The “Monkey See, Monkey Do” Strategy: Sometimes you kinda just walk in there, wave at the kiddo and make funny faces at them and get them to warm up to you, and then do the stuff you want them to do and they just… do it. I find it SUPER cute when I do this for MSK exams to check neurovascular status after an injury or for neuro exams, particularly finger-to-nose testing… it’s just so magical.

The “Smoke and Mirrors [and Additional Screentime]” Strategy: I cannot stress enough how powerful distraction is…

The “Yeah… You’re Just Not Having It So Let’s Get This Over With” Strategy: …you just do the thing and you do it as quickly as possible and GTFO. The kid’s already crying, screaming, and trying to get away from you by any means possible so you might as well make it short.

(Sometimes I have so much fun with these that I come home and tell my significant other all about these exams and re-enact them on him and he just sits through the whole thing and laughs at me but is also like, “Wait did you come up with that on the spot?”, to which the answer is usually “yes, and I love doing it” or “at some point but since then I just do the same thing depending on the kid” and he just laughs and then I realise that he doesn’t see a single beanerino during his workday and I am immediately sad for him because that is really sucky.)

kiwifruit67

I love and appreciate fanfic authors, but I read their notes and I have to wonder what fucked up shit they did in a past life to make god hate them so much. Like why do the worst things happen to fanfic authors and they just brush over it. I’ll be reading a fluffy fic and the notes will be “hey sorry the fic is late both my parents died, I’m in hospital right now, and my house burnt down. anyway hope u enjoy this chapter!!“ bro???? Are you okay?????

eroticcannibal

STOP CENSORING SUBTITLES/TRANSCRIPTS/CLOSED CAPTIONS

LET DEAF AND NEURODIVERGENT PEOPLE READ “FUCK”

eroticcannibal

I know this sounds jokey and funney but I am serious and it is ableist and infantilising and inaccessible so stop

mjalti

do u think that angels having sex with humans was seen as like beastiality in angel-world

humancoffeegrounds

do you think that when you reach the gates of heaven they’ll show you this post

mjalti

bold of you to presume I can die

crystalquintessential

Pretty sure they actually answer this in the bible and the answer is yes. The whole ‘Lucifer and the lesser angels want have free will’ part has the ‘angels also wanting to be gendered so they can be with humans’ part in it.

aviculor

god was kinkshaming satan

dont-at-m3

God got a virgin pregnant without consent, he can mind his business

seaflying-fliptuna

She did consent tho, like, that’s a whole thing, I’ve been in masses where the main focus was Mary’s Yes. It didn’t happen without warning, an angel was literally like “hey my pal up there is thinking u should birth his humansona” and she was like “that’d be an honor”

mjalti

I didn’t claw my way out of hell just to be sent back there by reading the word Humansona,

sirfrogsworth

It’s admirable they are at least giving the flies a fighting chance.

adrenaline

whitepeopletwitter

marzipanandminutiae

the thing about millennials who don’t want kids is I feel like a lot of them are deeply On Board for their friends’ kids

like I’m among the minority of my friends in definitely for sure wanting kids someday

but each of my parenthood-eschewing friends has claimed a different role in my future offspring’s life and they seem very excited to play it

so we as a generation may have fewer children

but I feel like they’ll be the most supported and loved children imaginable

pfdiva

As a millennial who doesn’t want children, I am seconding this, because it’s not like we don’t want children to exist in the world! We do! Children can be lovely and amazing and they are literally our future! It’s just So Very Difficult to raise children in our nuclear-family society, especially as a millennial, and you want to do the job RIGHT.

Well, if you can’t do the job right yourself, the least you can do is help a friend raise THEIR child right, help take the burden off their shoulders, and give that kid all the love and attention they can stand.

I’d be damned excited to do that, too.

thelongestpuzzle

this generation is so excited and ready to be weird uncle/aunt so-and-so

micaxiii

I hope this generation makes communal families a thing again and this time it won’t be treated like a “taboo hippie thing”

tallteal

Takes a village to raise a kid

backfromrlyeh

“Never Explain Anything” ― H.P. Lovecraft

teamvoorhees

@bunjywunjy wtf are these?

bunjywunjy

have no fear, they may look like writhing demon lumps but they’re actually black Oranda Goldfish!

whiiich are still pretty weird, actually.

that fleshy lumpmess on their heads is called a ‘wen’ and it’s supposed to be considered beautiful, rather than profoundly disturbing. but either way, they’re good interesting fish and please don’t pick them up unless you know what you’re doing, that’s mean D: