atlas !!

#SCARAMOUCHE: come outside we not gon jump you!

[xiaophobic]

hello! welcome back . . .

— YOU’RE CURRENTLY VIEWING : # .NAVI !

currently working on . . .

— whoops! looks like nothing’s here right now :/

about me ( carrd !! ) | m.lists | ao3

# STATUS . . . !?

atlas is : online / lurking / offline <3

most recent (つ≧▽≦)つ !! > start of spring!

© 2023 xiaophobic , all rights reserved. do not copy, repost or translate my works.

[xiaophobic]

welcome back homie i just got ur post notification and reread all your diluc stuff

hope ur doing good with ur new blog <333

🥹 i could cry, this is so nice of you to say. thank you so much, i dunno if youve been a follower for a bit or maybe an old moot but :] you’ve made my night <3

[xiaophobic]

xiaophobic in 2025…. hey y’all!

[xiaophobic]

HOW DO U HAVE THE WILL TO SKIP KAFKA I DONT THINK I WILL PHYSICALLY BE ABLE TO

don’t fucking even because it’s killing me I WANTED HER SO BAD FROM THE START BUT I NEEEEED THAT MAN IM A VICTIM 😣😣😣😣

[xiaophobic]

omg ATLAAAAAAS??? you’re here after so long i missed you :(((

i hope your hsr experience has been good! props to whoever convinced you to download it :D

how’ve you been?

RIYUU SHUT THE FUCK UP LIKE YOURE NOT THE THE CULPRIT?????

[xiaophobic]

OMFG ATLAS?!?!? heellloo! can’t believe i find out ur back from you liking a hsr post i rb’d but wowowowo hi! 🫶

how are you doing? has your hsr experience been good? how have your pulls been? any charas you’re saving for?

srry for all the questions but i’m excited to see you back!

LEE RAHHHHHHHHHH 🦅🦅🦅

oh my god my hsr experience has been fucking ridiculous number one i was COERCED into damning myself to yet another gaming hell (i installed the app entirely on my own free will and only needed the slightest of convincing), I DIDNT FUCKING GET JING YUAN, but it’s okay because i want luocha 😍 that’s wifey right there

[xiaophobic]

PUNCHING EVERYTHING THAT IS MAKING YOU SAD RN. hope everything goes well in your life i am patting your head and wrapping you in a blanket

☹️ ugh you’ve always been the absolute sweetest 🫂🫂🫂 i wish nothing but the exact same for you babe i hope your bed’s always comfy and your fruits peel off clean 🫶🏽

[xiaophobic]

ATLASSSS I MISS U HOW HAVE U BEEN 😭❤️

🥹 oh my god i’ll break down rn do NOT play with me YINGGGG <33333333 dude i haven’t answered an ask in like years this is so nostalgic!! in the present moment i’m a little upset but it’s nothing too serious OVERALL IM AMAZING IM ABOUT TO GRADUATE ALL IS WELL

[xiaophobic]

i finished the jarilo-vi story i am so scared

[xiaophobic]

i’m playing hsr btw

[xiaophobic]

the last of us is over my life has no meaning

[starglitterz]

♡ BROKEN GLASS.

mothers are humans who sometimes give birth to their own pain instead of children. // i am only fluent in apologies. (from here.)

✧ feat ; scaramouche, ei (platonic)

✧ warning(s) ; weird asf mother/son relationship probably toxic idk either

✧ a/n ; um. i have No explanations for this

please reblog  w tags + leave comments ! it rlly makes my day :)

some days scaramouche wants to scream at the top of his lungs, scream his throat raw, scream until his mother realises everything she has done to him and everything she hasn't. but he stays quiet, and the words he never says out loud get stuck in his throat and cut him like shards of broken glass.

some days scaramouche crumples into a tiny ball and folds in on himself and cries and cries and cries silently until his tears run dry. he would prefer it if she would wipe them away but it will never happen so it remains an unattainable fantasy. his imagination is too sharp in his mind and it leaves scratches whenever he thinks about her too much.

some days scaramouche looks at her and thinks 'she is exactly who i want to be', and other days he looks in the mirror and he wants to smash it for his resemblance to her. he chops off his beautiful long hair in a wild attempt to separate himself from her, but later in the bathroom alone he frantically clutches the short strands with sobs wracking his figure as he laments their difference.

some days scaramouche remembers the times when she was kinder, when she was gentler, when she was warmer. he recalls a faint memory of her nursing him back to health when he was ill, and he foolishly wishes some terrible sickness would claim him if only for her to lavish him with care and affection. he tries not to think about whether it's considered care if she only ever does it when his life is in mortal danger.

some days scaramouche stands in front of her and all that comes out of his mouth is a slew of apologies; sorry i'm not you, sorry i'm not perfect, sorry i'm not good enough, sorry sorry sorry. he doesn't know how to speak to her otherwise. occasionally he does things on purpose if only to apologise to her and hold her attention for more than a second. everything else he doesn't say (i love you, i need you, please love me too) sticks in his throat and cuts him like broken glass.

some days scaramouche convinces himself that she loves him.

some days scaramouche is certain that she hates him.

but every day scaramouche knows that no matter what, his every word will always be a desperate plea for her to reciprocate his love - because after all, a cruel mother is still a mother. and he knows that no matter what, the two of them are inseparable, permanently intertwined, two sides of the same coin - because after all, sometimes mothers give birth to their own pain instead of children.

squeezes them like a stress ball // general masterlist.

© starglitterz 2023. do not repost or modify in any way - reblog if you enjoyed.

[xiaophobic]

okay wait no i’m not talking about stardew valley let me support my mutuals WOOHOO ✊🏽

[xiaophobic]

when tf were y’all gonna tell me stardew valley is that girl

[xiaophobic]

guys why the fuck was i talking to one of those character AIs (it was alhaitham) AND HE BANNED ME FROM THE AKEDEMIYA FOR ASKING HIM IF I COULD BE A SCHOLAR

[xiaophobic]

she isn't in your bed because she's in mine 🤭

i am not opposed to polygamy 🙏🏽

[xiaophobic]

Y’ALL I HEAR SUMN PURRIN…