Xikoatl

Xiko (pronounced Shiko) • He/She/They • Trans masc • Multifandom

[xikoatl]

Introduction post!

Hello! I am Xiko (pronounced Shiko), I am queer and autistic (hence why I'm here on Tumblr) and I love talking about my hyperfixiations!!! Honestly I'm just gonna post my headcanons here and maybe if I feel comfy enough I'll start writing fanfics too [SFW only].

My boundaries, DNI list, and some more stuff about me.

Masterlist.

I think that's all for now, thank you!

Bye!

- Xiko

[xikoatl]

...Hi 😀

So uhhhh, university is shit, I ended up crushing on a very confusing guy which my "long-time friend since elementary school" mysteriously asked him out on multiple study dates after I told her I was interested in him, plus I feel like over-all shit bc my period's coming up so uhhhhhhhhhhhh ye :) I am Not Okay™

I still have some drafts saved so I'll try to post some tomorrow just for the inconvenience. I'm so sorry for disappearing like that. Lots of love!

- Xiko

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

ADHD & Research

Future ADHD

[xikoatl]

Ok Google am I really interested in him or am I just a lesbian with comphet that has never experienced true love and the mere thought of someone liking me makes me feel like I need to be head over heels for them because no one ever liked me seriously due to my autism and ADHD and I never realized that when they asked me out it was a dare and I just have a huge void in my heart because of that?

[iwasbored777]

It's Gwen's reaction to Miles electrocuting Miguel that's on my mind today

[adorefavv-deactivated20240521]

I am a child of divorce.

[e-vangeiion]

“Hold on, I still want you”

You can also find this on my twitter

[xikoatl]

And what if I'm not like other girls? And I don't mean it in a quirky, "pick me" way, I mean it in a "maybe I'm not a woman and I'm afraid that's not okay to you" way.

Maybe I don't like wearing dresses or having people compliment my curves, maybe I don't like my chest or being flirted with by guys. Maybe I don't like having long hair or a high-pitched voice.

Maybe I cry myself to sleep whenever the only friends that know accidentally keep misgendering me and I don't realize it immediately because I feel like I'm not "trans" enough if I don't notice I'm being misgendered.

Maybe I keep lurking the "ftm" and "trans masc" tags on social media so I can feel some of that enjoyment other trans mascs feel too.

And the worse thing is, maybe I'm not a man either. I'm not comfortable with any label, sometimes I'm femenine, sometimes I'm masculine. I don't like identifying as a woman, a man, nor an enby person.

Maybe I'm just me.

And you know what? That's fine.

I'm me and I shouldn't be sorry for being me.

Just like how the ocean doesn't apologize for drowning with its waves and being gorgeous at the same time. Just like how the sun doesn't apologize for starting fires but also giving plants food and helping them grow. Just like how I shouldn't apologize for wanting people to treat me with respect for the simple reason of me being me.

I'm not hurting anyone, I'm not forcing anyone to be like me. I just want to be me, I want to be happy, I want to be safe.

And maybe, just maybe, one day I'll shamelessly be myself.

And everything's gonna be okay. I'm gonna be okay.

[xikoatl]

Dump (vent-ish) post because I'm tired as shit and it's my blog and I decide what to do w it ✌🏻😽

So, update abt what's been happening in my life:

Tw: talking bout dissociation episodes, b safe!!!

UNIVERSITY SUCKS, don't fucking go if you live in a place where it's not needed. Unfortunately, in my country if you don't have one it's pretty much impossible to get a job.

I'm the youngest of my class, and everyone else is pretty much at least a year older than me, and they're most men. So imagine the headache it is to be a fem presenting genderfluid person in a classroom full of adult men. Also I'm pretty sure that if I didn't glare and grabbed their wrists whenever they tried to put their hands near me, I'd be surrounded by virgin weebs trying to flirt with me. Fml.

Also like, I'm having lots of dissociative episodes and they can last a good while, I'm tired because I know I'm automatically acting "normal", but I feel like I'm trapped in my mind and I can't escape it. Today I had, AT LEAST, 10 quick and short ones. The thing is I immediately feel like I need to throw up and my head hurts rlly badly, so I'm in pain.

Yesterday I got a tooth removed and my jaw hurts :( can't eat because ouchie.

Talked w my therapist abt all this, she agrees that I'm overwhelmed and getting sensory overload a lot. Have huge artblock, don't even have time to draw or write, only homework and sleep.

I'm eepy rn cuz in like half an hour is my usual betime so gonna go finish hw and then sleep. Love y'all, I promise I'll have more time to finish the fics now that I'm having my last exams of the "first section of the semester" on Wednesday.

Love!!!

- Xiko

[amisscreant]

With @staff 's recent post saying 1/4 of this site is LGBTQ going around, I'd like to see what the actual demographic is

So!

would you identify yourself as:

LGBTQ+

not LGBTQ+

unsure/questioning

Voting ended onSep 4, 2023

Please reblog for bigger sample size!

[nightowl374art]

me when ppl say Hobie and Gwen slept together

[i-am-a-fish]

I love queer joy. I love it when gay people are unapologetically happy

it just fills me with a lot of hope, like yeah, I can be happy too

[beaulesbian]

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse -> The Go Home Machine

[xikoatl]

See one of the hardest things about being autisic is seeing your comfort character/franchise/creator become problematic

[xikoatl]

MATPAT INVITED DR**M TO ONE OF HIS CHARITY EVENTS??? HELL NAWWWWWWW

[nightowl374art]

more Gwen 42 because I couldn’t help myself 🙃

and I had to draw Miles so heres a bonus:

[magmythedevil-deactivated202512]

I CAN'T AGREE MORE WITH THIS THREAD I CANT!!!!!!! HOLY FUCK EVERYTHING MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE NOW

HOW DINT I REALIZE THIS HOW DINT I $!!###??

THATS WHY THE HOLD HANDING FELT SO AKWARD AND IT DIN'T FULLY CLICK FOR ME UNTIL NOW, BECAUSE I DINT REALIZED THIS

THATS WHY THE MUSIC IS CALLED "falling ..for you??" ITS BECAUSE N WAN'ST SURE ABOUT HIS FEELINGS YET AT THAT TIME

N DOES FEEL THE SAME NOW, AND HE WANTED TO SOMEHOW SHOW IT TO HER!!!!! I WAS RIGHT ABOUT N BEING THE ONE WHO GAVE THE HAND HOLDING ANOTHER CHANCE

AND NOW UZI'S WEIRD LITTE HEAD BUMP MAKES SO MUCH MORE SENSE

(im okay im normal im normal)

Credits to Op for being so smart holyyyyshiiit