how i seed it

It's a crazy world out there. Every day is a series of nonsensical episodes. And here, I live to tell the tale.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.7 Let down your hair

Yet another non-conventional family. A father and a daughter without the mother. It is due to the birth of the daughter that brings death to the mother - a cliched irony. Let's think of how it is to live after all you think is worth living for does not exist. Will he ever find a new reason for him to pursue this?  Is there enough love for this unknown baby who “kills” his beloved wife? How can he live on with problems knocking at their door. He can’t escape the harsh reality of misfortune.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.6 Kuya ko

Older brother and younger brother relationship. We get to see how Philippines society looks into the "manly" perception of males. How it is to be strong when you can live for yourself, but weak when you cannot. It poses the question: Is it not true strength to be able to not only think of one's own survival, but the protection another? I can be that the younger brother past may further be made know. Answering questions such as why was he such as way? Was it purposely done? Was it his childhood, an experience? Or maybe it was due to the older brother himself? 

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.5 What is left unsaid

The story of Angela, who had gone through much criticism and discrimination not because of herself, but because of her homosexual father. She questions many things, and leads her to overthink and finally ask: “Why?” Why is it that I am in such a situation? Why is it that I am so depraved? Why is it that my father - whom I love so dearly - is hated by so many?

There can be the angle of looking into the perspective of a mature mind of a child. A child who should have played out in the rain during the first rain of May, but couldn’t since her father tells her not to. People are selfish. That is reality. It is something the father wants to teach her daughter as well, but why is he so. That is the question of the child. To unravel the history of the father through the eyes of her daughter.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.4 Frat haus

Brotherhood relationship. Maybe not the typical sort, since it is from a fraternity's perspective. However how many years have passed, be it they are good or bad brothers - it is an obligation. What else is there? Family comes first right? A common issue, and a timely one at that. Maybe a multi-character perspective of how they all came into being part of this house, how they came to feel part of a home, and how is it to not be able to leave? What is it that entices them to this sort of communal bond among men? It is the perception of manliness that is requires to endure such pains, and for what? That is what the perspectives of three people come in.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.3 Bakit nga ba

Nicole, an innocent child. An issue that is not very uncommon to most of us - child prostitution. It gives a small glimpse of what it is that actually happens in such situations. How men's fetishes are being made into a business at the expense of unknowing little girls. Going into matter that are far far from what she should be exposed to. Is she willing to do so? Is she aware of what she is doing? Does she believe this is the norm? What will happen to a child living in such circumstances.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.1 Beyond Bantay

The bond between man and beast, or in this case a dog. It is presented how beings such as animals like ourselves are not so capable of living independently even though we think we are - as "higher" beings. We go back to the thinking: "Everything is connected to everything else". We see here the mutual relationship between man and his best friend.  Possibilities would be a greater look on the live of both Mang Ed and Bantay. How they came to be, because it would seem like an interesting story. A lame man, guided by his dog. How so were they able to go about their day. What would a normal day be like for them? To what extent their relationship goes. I bet it's a rather wonderful one as opposed to this sad story of them forever parting.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

12.2 Saan ka nakatingin?

A woman and her son in a difficult situation. Her son having a past experience with robbery and thievery as a result of loss of money. She aims to be his pillar of support during these times. A relationship of a single mother and son. She encounters familiar experiences in the past, but she opts to ignore them. There is much to be done, but she simple turns her head the other way. It can flashback into the past and highlight the instances where the thieving worsened and worsened and thus reached the point where it had already crossed the line. Maybe a unavoidable or unchangeable event whose decision would brand the boy as unacceptable by society. It can go to this extend, to help us understand what it was that leads people into desperation and self-preservation.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.7 Instant mommy

Mark is a widower with his one-year old daughter. It has been a year since Anette died. It’s been rough but they’ve been strong. Mark leaves Frances (1.7) to their neighbors every time he goes out to work. Everyday the same routine. He still had debts to pay, along with the ones for the funeral at the home. He didn’t expect it to rise so much just because he was overdue. He takes care of Frances well enough. He uses most of his salary for the milk of Frances, it’s one thing he can’t really provide for himself. He always eats pancit canton (5.3) for dinner, because that was what he could afford. It also reminds him of Anette’s curly hair. 

He receives a letter of repossession for their duplex. (4.3) Years of saving, gone in a flash. They had a month to find a new home and settle in. There was nothing else to do. He carries frances into their room and turns on the TV, and sets it to play the Rapunzel DVD (7.3). It was Frances’ favorite, she didn’t understand the story but she loved the soundtrack. She giggles each time Gothel would say: “Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair”. Mark proceeds to the bathroom.

An hour and a half has passed, and the movie has ended. Although it was the Grimm’s version that Mark plays. Rapunzel does not wake up with the kiss of the prince, but with the birth of a child. She is awakened by the child feeding on her breast. Mark returns to her side and lifts her up. He tells her that she was the child of Rapunzel, but did she not awaken when you feed on her. Frances stops crying but he tells her: “But I am not your King”

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.6 Bayani ko

Alfonso (1.6)  was a young soul in an old man’s body. He has always loved to explore and have adventures. He wasn’t easily scared but he also was not fearless. He was the right mix of both. He has a chicken peck mark (9.3) on his nose to prove it, as a child he was energetic. Always pointing out, saying how it was his “Battle scar”. He was proud of it. His brother on the other hand was a wimp, less of a man, even a weathercock. Who seemed to just go with the flow with everything. Manuel rode his coattails. That was how he saw it. Never thinking for himself, always he had to be the hero to save him. Although, their mother cared more for him than Alfonso. Manuel was sickly. But who cares? He has to stand up for himself sooner or later.

Their mother now deceased, the taking care of Manuel has been left to Alfonso. Why must he be stuck with his fool of a brother? Manuel works as a waiter boy (10.3). His pay wasn’t even enough to pay for the water bill which Manuel constantly uses to take four baths a day. It has been years like this. Now, Alfonso is also old and lives in a nursing home. One day, Manuel was shouting that he wanted go home, back to Cavite. (5.7) He wanted to see mama, but Alfonso was too busy. They got into a heated argument both shouting so loudly. Manuel: “Lagi lang naman kasi iniisip mo sarili mo” Alfonso slapped him. Manuel was no where to be found after that day he left home - he didn’t say why he left. He just did.

An earthquake shaked the capital. (6.1) It left the nursing home in ruins. It was the only place he sends his pension out to. In the hospital as Alfonso recovers, he receives a  package - an empty box. He looks at the box, but there was nothing inside. Only the sweet smell of soap and a note: “Sorry kuya”

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.5 Karera

At 10 years old, (1.5) Angela’s head was titled to the right. It was only obvious when she tells you, but she doesn’t really tell. Unless you observe her long enough. But who would look at a little girl who was merely the daughter of a gay man. She hears her father as he walks in their rickety apartment building. (4.2) The tick-tack tacking of his high heels (3.6), as he was off to “work”. She remembers the same clip-clopping of horse in movie she used to love: “Spirit: Stallion of Cimarron” (3.6). The horse there was trying to find his way to freedom when it was oppressed by American innovators as he was driven out of their natural home, he escapes and found true freedom.

She is kissed by her father on the forehead, asking her to make-do with dinner last night. He still hasn’t received his pay, but he will and that he promises. She proceeds to the market, where she helps sell vegetables and gets to keep the not-so-good ones. Although she wasn’t very good since she always spoke in a small voice, she couldn’t attract enough customers. It was late in the afternoon, when she proceeded hom. She switches on the lights, but they don’t work. Their electricity had been cut off - again.

She looks at her house, which is as small as a horse’s stable, and it was just as dirty. She lights a candle to help her see what she had to prepare for dinner. It was herself again, dad was out. There’s the morning shift as a salesclerk and night shift at a night club. She is off in a daze. Again, she remembers the horse, but this time a race horse. She looks at the candle light, as it tips over and falls on the bed sheet. Life is a race. And no one’s betting on her to win.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.4 Bahay

Mario (1.2) has been living alone for the past five years, not being able to stay in a job for more than 3 months. Although, he was a nice man. Trustworthy, kind and reliable. It was his hard luck that gets him fired - wrong timing. This large house was his ancestral home (4.6), although he only stayed in one of the rooms. He had one mattress on the floor, where he slept and beside it was his phone. All the time, ready for him to pick it up whenever there was a call of: “You’re hired, you start tomorrow” or “You’re not what we’re looking for”. 

He was getting ready for work, wearing his white long sleeves and leather shoes. He received a call on his way out. Although they didn’t come from any of his job application or HR departments. It wasn’t what he was expecting. It came from an old frat he was part of back in college. They needed a favor. It was that time of the year. He simply nodded to himself and said: “Ready naman lagi para sa inyo”. After the call, he moved his stuff around and made some space. He stayed at home that day and absented from his daytime job at a fast food chain, he reasoned out it was important - a family matter. He downloaded some Mozart and Beethoven on his phone. He bought some cups, and beverages. The visitors came at 8pm: men, guys and boys. 

They proceeded inside, he guided them into a big room - the sala - were the old furniture was pushed aside. The wooden rocking chair was where “Miguel” sat, their head, their “kuya”. He goes into his room, and leaves them to their work. He sits and wears his earphones and plays the music. He begins to get parched, he stands and proceeds to the kitchen. He passes by the sala, blood splatters a bit on the white rubber shoes of Miguel. (6.6) He hears them laughing amongst themselves: “I wore the wrong shoes today.” (5.4)

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.3 Titig

It was already late into the night, around 11 pm. A little girl - Nicole (1.3) was alone on the streets of Manila. She held in her hand a black marker (8.4) and little blue and green notebook (9.7). She stands on the side of the road, and people pass by and don’t seem to notice her as she doodles with the marker. There were little scribbles but they weren’t really understandable. Another girl suddenly peeps through her notebook and asks her: “Naka-ilan ka na?”, and she hides the notebook. The other girl tries to play with her, but she doesn’t talk. She was timid and cautious. She didn’t like talking to other people, even with children her age. 

A number of police cars pass by - it was ordered to have an increase of policemen (6.3) that would patrol in the night. One of the cars stopped and backed-up to the two girls. They were asked where their parents are. Nicole did not respond, whereas the other girl shouted for them both: “Wala. Nasa Tondo!”. The policeman nodded, but was still worried for the girls with 10 years of age. He looks at nicole, and sees her red doll shoes. The policeman immediately goes down the car and asks the child where she got her shoes. She is still meek, not saying a word. He kindly asks them to come with him to the police station because they weren’t safe there.

The policeman held the hand of Nicole and she went crazy, trying to get herself away from his grip. Three teenagers passed by (5.5) and saw what was happening to the kids. The guy ran up to the police and proceeded to defend the two kids thinking that the policeman was being too rough on the girls. The girl drops her notebook, one the friends of the man pick it up. They saw the doodles were of beady, dark eyes. And a list of the names of men, their signatures, numbers and dollar signs.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.2 Sa kabila

Teresa is reading a book (1.1) , while riding on the LRT on her way to her son’s condo (4.1). He had just started working and has opted to move out and live independently. He had always been a serious boy (10.4), thinking of academics first and now his job. This worries the mother even more. She’s paying him a visit today. He doesn’t like to call home, which makes her think of things all the more. She thinks of him as David in the story David and Goliath (7.6). Which is what she names him, seeing him from the glass pane the day she adopted him. He was so frail with snow white skin (9.6). She knew at that moment that she had to help him in fighting the goliath of life: “He can’t possibly do that on his own, she thinks”

A boy playing with a toy truck enter the women’s cart. He is sits beside the mother on the seats in front of him. He tinkers with the toy and the truck goes beep beep beep (3.1). She is reminded of the day they lost all their savings at an ATM. A knife was pointed at her, she couldn’t do a thing. It was her life, or the money as they say. The money which was supposed to be for the tuition of her son. He started working because of this, and the Teresa had to live with a parlorista lady-like friend (5.6). The lady-like friend didn’t like the idea of the son living with him. His son chose elsewhere. 

The train got tighter and people were crowding around. As she was reading through, she suddenly sees the boy with truck picking out the pocket of an office worker. She didn’t notice at once, but she did. She looks to the boy and she snatched back her phone. The girl was shouting and preaching to the mother, how irresponsible she was to bring up such a boy. She listens in but slowly loses interest and continues on with her book, she doesn’t like being disturbed. She didn’t want to be part of this or anything else. She was thinking: “Been there, done that”

[yeahsoinanutshell]

11.1 The Last Supper

Mang Ed and his dog Bantay (1.4) proceeded to the local sari-sari store (3.7), owned by an old lady (10.7). She reeked of smoke (2.1) , probably because she did smoke. She was old but she still had a lot in her. She didn’t think of the “bad” things in the cigarette, she would think: “If I were to die, then I would have a long time ago. But then here I am”. He had a hard time looking up to the woman because he was in his wheel chair.

Bantay suddenly barked when he heard of two women talking on the road about “office gossip” (5.2). Something around the lines of getting in trouble and getting framed for it. The women dropped her pen in the irrigation flowing below the sari-sari store. He didn’t attempt to pick it up. He thought: “They are more than capable to do it themselves” - that they were. And she tried picking it up. The dog went to the women and tried to fetch the pen in the shallow flowing water. 

A truck suddenly passes by the narrow road. The old woman shouts at the driver: “Oy, truck ban, bakit dito ka pa dadaan daan! Sa tingin mo hindi ka mahuhuli!” (6.2)The road was one lane, even SUV’s had a hard time passing through. Now this was a truck, but he pushed forward. Bantay barked and barked, as the roaring of the truck freaked him out. The dog was barking at the truck. The truck making the beeping sound of its reversal trying to get out as he could not proceed. One of the wheels skidded to the side of the road and hit the dog. There was no more barking. It was silent. The old lady handed over the plastic bag of leftovers - a meal that should have been for Bantay.

[yeahsoinanutshell]

10.7 Grocery Lady

“Ah saan ba, saan ba? Hindi ko na matandaan kung ano pang itsura ng packete na yun eh. Basta ang sabi yung kulay brown na may red sa taas, hindi ko naman mahanap. Saan ba dito - ah ito. Pero bakit may yellow, wala namang sinabing may yellow. Ano ba to? Ay ito so kuya, magpapaassist nga ako. AH kuya, oo yung brown nga. AH, wala na yung flavor na yun. Ah salamat. Kaya naman pala hindi ko mahanap-hanap eh wala na dito. AY AY, ano yung nahulog. Ay juskopo, ay nako. Hala, ang lapit lang nun san ba yun. Hala, ang daming tumitingin. Ay, nako nahulog yung mga box. Buti naman walang natamaan. Ay yung bata nako po, okay lang ba yan. Nasan na nanay niyan. Nako po, hindi dapat hinahaayan lang yang mga yan ng walang nagbabantay baka kung maano eh hindi na alam kung ano mangyayari. Buti na lang hindi siya ganun kalapit sa lugar na napagsakan. Ay ayan na, siya pala yung nakahulog. Takbo agad siya eh. Dapat kasi nagdadahan-dahan sa ganyan. Nako, andyan lang naman kasi pala lahat ng suplay ng mga grocery, eh panong hindi magkakaaksidente dito. Wala man lang harang. Pano na kung magkaroon ng lindol, edi patay tayong laht dito eh pagkabigat ba naman ng mga laman niyan."

[yeahsoinanutshell]

10.6 Kulit Boy

“Ehehe, ayun oh. Ayun siya eh. hahaha nagtatago nanaman. Ano ba ang kulit. Hala mama, punta tayo dun si Gab ang kulit kasi. Hala, oh. Yung aso natatakot lumapit kasi daw mabaho ka. haha. Amoy laging mabaho si Gab. Ang taba-taba moo, gusto kita pindutin! Pingot-pingot! Ang dami dami mo kasing kinakain. Tapos iluluwa mo din naman. Kadiri. WOW! Ang galing naman nun, ano yan. Wow, ipad. Hala, gusto ko din niyan. Palaro naman. Uy, papindot. Haha. Hala, galit ba siya. haha. Pahiram. Hala, ayun oh sumabog haha. Ang galing naman. Mama, gusto ko din ng laro. Bakit? Hindi ako pwede pahiram? Ang daya naman. Bakit siya pwede ako hindi. Madaya si mama, ayoko na kay mama. Bakit ikaw ganyan. Huhu. Ayoko ng kendi, gusto ko ipad. Asan na ipad ko. Bakit? Bakit naiwan. Sino nagiwan? Ayaw! Ayaw! Gusto ko lang ng laro. Ayoko na dito. Gusto ko na umuwi. Asan na si papa. Uwi na kami. Uwi na. Laruan? Akin tong laruan ko. Akala ko bibili tayo ng bagong kong laruan. Ayaw ko na yan! Ayaaaw! Bakit mo ba pinipilit eh ayaw ko nga. Huhu lagi mo na lang pinipilit gusto mo mama. Ayaw ko nga, ayaw ko! ARAAY, bakit mo ako pinapalo? Ayaw ko lang ng laruan. Ayaw kooo!! Gusto ko na kay papa. Gusto ko si papa. Nasan si papa!!"

[yeahsoinanutshell]

10.5 Busy Lady

“Hala, sino to? Ah, nagtext nanaman si Jack, kanina pa to ah. Actually, ang tagal nang ganito. Hindi ba siya napapgod. Crush siguro ako nito. Ayy bawal, ako boss neto haha. Pero kahapon naman ang kulit-kulit, sabi daw hindi ko pinapasin - eh pinansin ko naman. Parang bata kung magsalita eh 22 na. Haha. Hala meron pa ulit nagtext, baka siya nanaman. Huh? Hindi ko alam yung number. Ano to? Sabi ko na nga sa kanila kapag magtetext dapat magpakilala muna, hindi yung basta basta na lang. Hindi ko to rereplayan eh. Bahala sila kung emergency ba o hindi, kung hindi ko kilala kung sino wala na ako dyan. Kung sino pa pala tong kausap ko ng hindi ko alam. Ang dami-dami nang mga scam dyan. Mabudol-budol pa ako ‘no. Ang lalakas din talaga ng trip ng mga tao, hindi na lang maghirap sa buhay. Mga iba dyan ganito, nagtatrabaho para magkapera. Eh sila, nakaw lang? Snatch lang? Anong klaseng buhay yun? Ewan ko ba panong hindi sila nakokonsensya. Ibang level na mga magnanakaw eh. Ah, ano bang station bababaan ko. Kasi naman, bakit ako iniwan ni Kata. Eh alam naman niyang first time ko sumakay sa ganito. Grabe pala yung sikip. AY AY, yung bag ni ate naipit.”