— ( it’s apparent I can’t bear it and I swear it / @xdowonx
the only thing harder than pretending to recognize someone is, dowon realizes, pretending not to recognize them. sitting slouched behind the counter, head resting on his outstretched arm, sleepy eyes follow the figures moving across his phone screen, heavy eyelids threatening to close. at this time of the day, when there’s an abeyance in the usual flow of in-and-out customers and the food coma from lunch starts to hit, all he wants to do is take a nap. bask in the sunlight streaming in from large glass walls. let his mind wander along lyrics that feed into his ears, the familiar melody to cheeze’s recent album settling his thoughts. pop some gummies into his mouth and savor the fruitiness of haribo gummy bears.
but the moment a certain someone walks into the store, bell humming a light welcome, all of his usual peace is promptly jettisoned out the door. lassitude is replaced with the unsubtle thump thump of his nervous heart and he instantly sits up straight, fingers picking at stray strands of hair. from the periphery of his line of sight, dowon can see her, passing by the aisles of junk food and instant ramen. he doesn’t even know her name, has never had the nerve to ask her for it, but he does know that aside from this hour being the drowsiest time of the day, she’s also just made it his favorite.
unbeknownst to her, he’d taken it upon himself to have taken a liking to her—one that dowon had never made public. besides, it’s pretty much impossible when the only words he can make out whenever they run into each other at the elevator is, “what floor?”
god, he’s trying really hard not to stare, but it seems like she’s not successful finding what she wanted; what might be the problem? wait, she’s coming over. wait, of course she’d come over. dowon flushes. you’re the cashier, you idiot.
his throat feels parched and his quickened heartbeat is pounding in his ears, but he stays unmoving from his position. with apparent hesitation, she walks over to him. a question lingers in averted eyes, much like the one in his.
he wonders if she can notice the flush in his cheeks. “um, usually we do,” dowon rubs the back of his neck, “but the next shipping got delayed. i can check in the back though if you’ll give me a minute?” he doubts it’ll be there, but the look on her face makes him want to double check, and then maybe even check again.
it is known that while ryu yiseul found footing in her academics and professional life, what competence she held in those fields was sorely lacking in social settings. a little too stuck in the world of books and far off lands her naivety and unsureness were noticeable in situations like these.
she understands in her own fit of nerves that one should not judge a book by its cover, but she’s not naive enough to ignore her instincts. well maybe. just from past experiences, yiseul is aware that people dressed like the cashier in front of her rarely interacted with her unless they wanted to copy an assignment.
but yiseul suppose that could just be a lingering after-effect of her youth, and if one were to look at her past they would come to realize that her haughty exterior had more to do with her lack of friends outside her carefully curated friend group than clothing choices.
she had seen him before, arm lengths encounter on the elevator, quick glances when she stepped out to get her packages, and of course, her almost daily trips to the convenience store. the idea of approaching and speaking to the man should not be so daunting.
they were neighbors after all — and well, the supplier to her many needs of red bean ice cream and packs of ramen. it could not hurt, and it would be rude not to give him a chance and to properly introduce herself.
slender yet callused fingers fidget as yiseul awaits the man’s words, his cheeks are slightly red, perhaps from the heat? she knows that pain well enough, her years of staying cooped up in her bedroom or in the company of bookshelves had made her prone to overheating.
“oh,” the disappointment lingers in her voice, she should have known, she recalls one of her co-workers complaining about the mess of supplies chain that seemed overwhelming to so many restaurants and companies. yiseul hums in thought for a moment, looking down at the candy bars settled near the cashier.
“no it’s alright, i don’t want to bother you,” she finally explains, her own cheeks warming at the idea of inconveniencing someone, though it would be rude not to buy anything. yiseul hums in thought for a moment, looking down at the candy bars settled near the cashier — picking up a random chocolate bar, she places it onto the counter. “i’ll just uh take this..”
her smile is strained as she looks at the cashier in the eye for the first time. the worst of it had to be over right? “you live at center point right? so we’re somewhat neighbors, so just give me a heads up next time you guys have some delivered.”
