Smut Gremlin

[demoniclour]

⭐WLW Lockscreens⭐ Reblog if you save!!

[vampireapologist-archive-deacti]

ppl are so annoying “you can’t paint ur bedroom pink you’re an adult” i did not spend my entire life waiting to grow up and control my life to paint my bedroom beige

[hojolove]

I had a sales woman in furniture store try and tell me not to buy a hot bubblegum pink loveseat because she wanted me to “think about the future”

Bitch, I am thinking about the future. I already got a hot bubblegum pink couch at home and now I need a loveseat to go with it.

[madgastronomer]

when I first bought my house, I announced my decision to paint my bedroom purple. I had wanted a purple bedroom for thirty damn years, you fucking bet I was gonna have one now. My friends decided, for some reason, that I meant what one of them referred to as “14 year old girl purple” (through what’s wrong with the colors a 14 year old girl chooses, I don’t know, even if they’re not what I want as an adult). They didn’t believe me until they saw the color on the actual wall, even thought they helped me pick out paints. My mother, meanwhile, decided to get worried that if I painted my bedroom a “dark purple”, it would be “depressing”. As if, with an entire house to live in, I would spend all my time in the bedroom, which I wanted to be dark because I would be sleeping in there. In the damn dark.

I had like one, maybe two friends who were all like FUCK YEAH YOU PAINT IT WHATEVER COLOR YOU WANT, PURPLE BEDROOMS ARE AWESOME.

But when they actualy saw the finished bedroom, every single one of them was like, “Oh yeah, that’s really pretty.” (Well, the ones who supported me from the beginning were more like WOOHOO.)

And the moral of the story is: Fuck ‘em, please yourself. Either they’ll come around, or you can safely ignore every question of taste they opine about for the rest of time.

[themintycupcake]

This applies to other adulting activities, too. When I was a kid, I decided that I wanted to have a wedding cake made of doughnuts. When I got older, I figured that I would be “mature” about it and get a traditional cake, which the older adults approved of. Now that I’m 25 and facing the possibility of actual marriage in the near future, I’m just like “marriage is a social construct but it comes with tax & insurance benefits, so just give me that goddamn doughnut cake.” If they don’t like it then they don’t have to come to my wedding.

[aridotdash]

https://xkcd.com/150/

[undanewneon]

I would like you all to view my office. I’m thirty and my rainbow room is awesome, people can fight me

[spuffybot]

I’m thirty and my first big furniture purchase was a custom coffin shaped coffee table that opens up and is lined with purple crushed velvet. I would have loved it at 13 and I love it now. Growing up doesn’t mean you have to abandon what makes you happy.

[idareu2bme]

GROWING UP DOESN’T MEAN YOU HAVE TO ABANDON WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY.

[fruitcupabomination]

I’m 100% keeping this in mind

[tanrak]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

[ithelpstodream]

[renardtrickster]

Sometimes good posts are made by annoying people so I’ll help out

These are Safe Shorts. They were made by Sandra Seilz after someone attempted to rape her. If the fabric is torn, an alarm will be sounded.

This is the Rape-aXe, invented by a South African doctor by the name of  Sonnet Ehlers. After interviewing a rape victim who wished she had teeth down there, she made this. If someone’s penis is inserted and pulled back out, the teeth will sink in, and can only be removed by a doctor.

The Killer Tampon (couldn’t find a site for it), made by retired anaesthetist Jaap Haumann. When penetration takes place, the sharp end will slice the offending appendage.

The Anti-Rape Belt (also couldn’t find a site), made by a group of Swedish teenagers led by Nadja Björk. It requires two hands to undo.

Anti-Rape Underwear/Bra (once again), as made by a group of Indian students. Will deliver an electric shock when met with unwanted advances, as well as sounding an alarm.

Undercover Colours. Made by 4 male undergraduates at North Carolina U, they change colours when in contact with chemicals or drugs that cause unconsciousness. Used in case you’re wary that your drink has been roofied.

These are just tools to help, but in addition to being mindful of your situations and staying safe, they can help when the worst happens.

Stay safe.

[sabakunogaaraai]

ok, those are all kind of awesome. i wish they weren’t needed, bit still…awesome solutions.

[toothmuncher3000]

I feel more comfortable reblogging this version

[fawkyou-deactivated20190309]

RapeAxe has a gofund me up that barely has 700 dollars. I feel like the inventions that havent even been funded yet should be linked to the page you can support them at.

[babylonqaf]

RapeAxe- website which links their gofundme

[leaper182]

As of this reblog, Rape-aXe needs to raise $308,537. If you can’t help fund it, please reblog?

[rosa-berberifolia]

Spread the word!!!

[intothecostumeroom]

If you need Plan B, here’s a printable $10 off coupon. 

[thephotogfeminist-deactivated20]

It doesn’t expire either! It’s a continual offer

[oxytocindolorosa]

Always reblog the plan-b coupon. If you don’t want a baby, stop it before it happens.

[exigencelost]

The problem with having lesbian moms is you try to be super cool and cut all your hair off and buy a leather jacket and wear boots all the time and then you go to some event in your neighborhood and all these women three times your age start cooing “oh you look JUST like your mother when she was your age, my gosh what a blast from the past, oh I just love your hair”

[exigencelost]

And let me be very clear, okay: I’ve seen pictures of my mom when she was my age, and she looked cooler than I ever will. My mom had exactly my fashion sense except she was two point five degrees butcher and habitually took over government buildings. My other mom was about six degrees butcher than that, and SHE had a motorcycle. Both of them have been charged with felony arson. I’m the prep member of my family and there’s nothing I can do about it.

[kill-capitalism]

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

How do I get your moms to go back in time and adopt my infant self

[april]

gonna try using tumblr on my 3DS

[april]

i have successfully logged in after 5 attempts

[april]

there are no images and very little CSS that works. i am amazed that I can see icons at all

[april]

[originaldumbbaby]

damn i can’t believe the ds brings you the full mobile experience like this

[merliinsbeard]

due to personal reasons i will be image

[steampunkpirate131719]

Bill Nye for most of his career: Imma do science for kids. Science without politics. Nice, tame science for the kiddos.

Bill Nye now:

[thehouseofgrey]

The kids Bill Nye taught all that science to see grown up now. We’re all teens and young adults who are angry at the state of the world; and Bill said “hell yeah, let’s rage.”

[bookwormingparty]

[huntersxfoxes]

TATTOO PSA

SO I HAVE NEVER ONCE SEEN A POST LIKE THIS. AND OBVIOUSLY TATTOO ARTISTS AREN’T GOING TO MENTION IT. BUT I FEEL LIKE THIS IS IMPORTANT INFORMATION.

IF YOU ARE A RECOVERING SELF HARMER AND ARE PLANNING ON GETTING A TATTOO, YOU NEED TO BE PREPARED FOR THE HEALING PROCESS TO BE VERY SIMILAR TO THAT OF CUTS. WHICH CAN BE EXTREMELY TRIGGERING.

THE SCABS ARE SUPER SIMILAR ESPECIALLY IF YOU’RE GETTING WRITING OR FINE LINES. AND IT ITCHES JUST LIKE HEALING CUTS DO. I FEEL LIKE THIS NEEDS TO BE MENTIONED. NO ONE REALLY TOLD ME AND I GOT A HUGE REALITY CHECK THIS MORNING.

THAT IS ALL

[goodtattoo-badtattoo]

I don’t usually share stuff like this, but as someone who also struggles with mental health issues, it’s understandable how sharing this could help someone out.

[friendly-neighbourhood-alien-de]

This is very true please be careful, when I got my tattoo it made me have urges to self harm again so pls pls pls be aware

[rabidkittencreations-blog]

Also worth mentioning that you can tattoo over scars. I have a lily on my shoulder and it was drawn specifically to cover a huge self harm scar.

[heartbeatemoji]

hint: if a person with clinical depression and anxiety says theyre tired …. dont tell them they have no reason to be …. bc guess what….. They Know and Its Shitty

[meowtian]

Louder!!!

[kucala]

I just want to add one thing-

If you have depression or anxiety? you’re not tired for no reason.

You’re tired because you have depression/anxiety.

Not only do they both come with low energy/fatigue as a legit common side effect, but they’re both fucking /exhausting/. fighting your brain all the time? exhausting. adrenaline crashes from anxiety/panic attacks? exhausting. being on edge all the time? exhausting. plus doing things costs /more/ energy when you have those mental illnesses.

You’re not tired for no reason, you’re tied because you have an illness that makes you tired.

[manymoonsago]

I needed to hear this so bad that it made me cry

[imjusttiredofblank]

LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!

[you-like-girls-deactivated20240]

[spidyspence]

okay let’s get something straight:

pride is not for everyone. pride is for LGBTQ people, and LGBTQ people only. pride is open to everyone, yes. allies and non LGBTQ people who want to support the community are absolutely welcomed and encouraged to participate, yes. but it is not for you.

it is still only for the LGBTQ community. and this is something that some cishet people need to learn.

pride is open to everyone. it is not for everyone. there is a difference.

[callous-goat]

It’s like walking into someone’s birthday party and acting like it’s a party for you, like you’re open to come to the party, but it ain’t being thrown for you

[magicalgirlpropaganda]

The whole self love thing is good and all but some people can’t fathom being loved. They can’t imagine there being anything good about them. So they can’t simply just stop doing unhealthy things, there’s a process.

[sandersstudies]

Before self love you have to invoke self tolerance and self neutrality.

[sandersstudies]

If you can’t say “I love my body!” say “my body gets me from place to place.”

If you can’t say “I’m beautiful,” begin by shutting down the “I’m ugly” thoughts and saying “I’m a person.”

If you can’t say “I’m valuable” begun by shutting down the “I’m worthless” thoughts and say “all people deserve basic respect, and I’m a person.”

If you can’t say “I’m important,” or “I’m kind” say “I am the one who waters my plant every week” or “I am the one who tips the kind barista down the street” or “I am the one who makes sure my dog does not eat plastic” or “I am the one who leaves long comments on people’s fan fictions.”

[thirstygirlclub]

I spent way too long on this header. I guess I’ve written a lot of stuff, huh?

Key -

!!!   = smut

<3  = platonic

MR = Male Reader

HC = head canon/includes

Clay Morrow

Surprise?

Someone Messing With Clays Old Lady (HC)

His First Father’s Day

Clay Having A Crush On You (HC)

Being Clay’s Old Lady (HC)

Clay Finding Out You’re Pregnant (HC)

Unser’s Daughter In A Relationshiop With Clay (HC)

Clay Helping You Through Finals Stress (HC)

Clay Taking Care Of You When You’re Sick (HC)

Cuddling With Clay (HC)

Opening up to Clay that you had/have an emotionally abusive mom (HC)

Jax Teller

Young And Insecure (!!!)

Opie Winston

The Bird

Opie Having A Crush On You (HC)

You Are My Family

Bobby Munson

Smoking Weed With Bobby (HC)

Perfect Girl 

Dating Bobby (HC)

Chibs Telford

Does Santa Ride A Harley?

Just A Diet

Bed Socks

Calm Down Lass

Chibs Being Insecure Of Your Age Difference (HC)

Letters And Flowers And Shit

Chibs Having A Crush On You (HC)

Do You Think I’m Cute, Chibby?

Are You Jealous? (!!!)

Lazy Days With Chibs (HC)

At It For Hours

Chibs’ Old Lady And Suffering With Depression (HC)

Tig Trager

Burning Calories (!!!)

An Exercise In Narcissism 

Freak - Part 1

Freak - Part 2

Tig Having A Crush On You (HC)

His Escape From Chaos

Younger Than Tig And Having His Baby (HC)

High School Reunion

Juice Ortiz

New Years Day

Blanket Forts

Ever So Sweet (MR) 

Rainbow Feather Duster (MR)

Over Worked

Don’t Be Disgusting

Juice Having A Crush On You (HC)

Pet Project - Part 1 (<3) (MR)

Pet Project - Part 2 (<3) (MR)

Happy Lowman

Family Is Important (<3) (MR)

Light Sleepers

Fight Me - Part 1 (MR)

Fight Me - Part 2 (MR)

Fight Me - Part 3 (MR) (!!!)

Under His Wing - Part 1 (<3) (MR)

Under His Wing - Part 2 (<3) (MR)

Under His Wing - Part 3 (<3) (MR)

Happy Having A Crush On You (HC)

Owning A Dog With Happy (HC)

Fighting With Happy (HC)

Daddy Issues 

Criminal

Fighting With Happy (HC)

Come On Kid - Part 1

Come On Kid - Part 2

Smoking Weed With Happy (HC)

Herman Kozik

A Boy Named Box - Part 1 (MR)

A Boy Named Box - Part 2 (MR)

A Boy Named Box - Part 3 (MR)

A Boy Named Box - Part 4 (MR)

Other

Being A Female Member Of SAMCRO (HC)

No Bikes. No Kuttes. No Club.- Alvarez x Reader

Being Friends With Unser (HC)

Gemma Being A Mother Figure To You (HC)

Going On A Roadtrip With The SoA Family (HC)

Introducing Your Parents To The SoA Family (HC)

SAMCRO Helping You Through ED Relapse (HC)

[minigenos]

Would you accept this round warm girl into your life?

[theexfiles-deactivated20190101]

I would die for her

[fanboyingoverdemigods]

There is nothing wrong with our school system.