The shrine was crowded, as it was every year, people chatting in low voices, tossing coins and offering prayers while waiting for the the clock to strike midnight.
Tooru stood next to the storage shed, a corner of the shrine that somehow always managed to remain secluded during the New Years despite the mass of people everywhere else.
This year was the first time in recent memory, or really in all of his memory, that Tooru waited for midnight alone. Every New Year’s Eve since childhood, he and Hajime had met in this very corner, huddled together for warmth to tell each other their wishes for the coming months. It had started when they had gotten separated from their parents one year and evolved into an unspoken tradition, even as their wishes changed from ‘let me catch more beetles’ to ‘let me get into the volleyball team’ to ‘I want more chocolate this Valentine’s Day,’ even as the greeting of ‘happy New Year’ at precisely twelve in the morning changed into a lingering kiss during their second year of high school, the wish into ‘I want this forever.’
This year Tooru stood with his phone pressed hard against his ear, trying to burrow further into his jacket for warmth. He had considered staying with his parents, but when the phone rang and Hajime’s name lit up his screen he couldn’t bring himself to answer until he was leaning against the shed’s wooden wall.
“Happy New Year,” Hajime said, and the sound of his voice slightly muffled through the connection made Tooru’ heart tighten with a sense of wrongness, because Hajime should have been there beside him, Tooru’s head resting in the crook of his neck, not kilometres away, just a voice through a receiver that made him sound a little different.
“It’s not midnight yet, Iwa-chan,” Tooru said teasingly, knowing Hajime could see through his false cheer, doing it more for himself than anything.
“I know that, Shittykawa,” Hajime said with a grumble. Tooru found himself unable to force out the indignant squawk that was almost reflexive, the corners of his mouth lifting up at the familiar sound of the nickname instead.
“I miss you,” Tooru said, the words bubbling up from somewhere inside him, and suddenly it was hard from him to breathe, tears threatening at the corners of his eyes. “Hajime, I miss you. I wish you were here.”
Hajime said nothing for a moment, Tooru only hearing the sounds of the unfamiliar shrine Hajime was at in the background. “What are you doing right now?” Hajime asked, and Tooru’s throat tightened at the slight tremble in Hajime’s voice.
“Waiting by the shed, as usual,” Tooru said, checking his watch. Only a couple of minutes until midnight. He braced himself, knowing for certain that he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from crying anyway.
“Alone?” Hajime asked. Tooru thought he sounded a little breathless, and wondered at it.
“New Year’s wouldn’t feel right anywhere else.” Tooru said, smiling fondly despite himself.
They were quiet for a few moments, only the sound of Hajime’s breathing filtering through. Tooru checked his watch. One more minute.
“It’s almost midnight,” Tooru mumbled, voice thick, and he knew there was no way Hajime couldn’t tell he was about to cry.
“Yeah,” Hajime said, his voice gentle. Tooru could almost see his expression, the same soft look in his eyes he got when he ran his fingers through Tooru’s hair or pulled him down for a kiss. Tooru gave up and let a sob shake him.
“I missed you too, Tooru,” Hajime said. Tooru’s reply was cut off by another sob, and Hajime sighed.
“Turn around,” he said, and Tooru did. Hajime was standing a few paces in front of him, free hand in his pocket, his posture sheepish, but his eyes glinting with excitement and pure longing. Tooru froze, thoughts coming to a complete halt, before he stumbled forward, flinging himself into Hajime’s arms, his phone falling somewhere on the ground behind him.
“Hajime!” Tooru said, tone meant to be chiding but coming out as little more than a plea, before he buried his face in the crook of Hajime’s neck and breathed.
The time that passed as they stood clutching desperately at each other felt like an eternity, compressed into a few scant seconds. As Tooru’s watch struck midnight, the wind carried the tolling of a Buddhist temple’s bell from somewhere in the distance.
“Happy New Year,” both of them whispered at the same time. Hajime lifted a hand from where it was fisted in Tooru’s jacket to cup his cheek. Tooru melted into the touch.
When their lips finally met, it was bliss.