𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔠𝔥 ⠀⠀ ᵇⁱᵗᶜʰ . ⠀⠀𖤐 @zberman - Tumblr Blog

on a semi hiatus until further notice

#i love writing and the rpc but right now it feels like a burden and i don’t want that??#so i’ll prob lurk & log on every once in a while but i just #need some time away!#esp with all the negativity i just feel weird n gross and my mental state is not helping #also don’t feel like plaguing y’all’s tl with my overwhelming negativity too #love you guys #negative /

zberman

@journalis

#have been on here!#and probably will continue 2 be for a while #so if u need me i am over there

@journalis

#:)

skinhorses

on trauma:

1. “and I never knew survival was like that. If you live, you look back and beg for it again, the hazardous bliss before you knew what you would miss.” (ada limón, from “before”)

2. “The consistency of hurt is what makes it so comforting.” (william nu’utupu giles, from “what do you want? it’s not that simple”)

3. “A child weaned on poison considers harm a comfort.” (gillian flynn, from “sharp objects”)

4. “When you’ve had a bad experience, you sometimes feel compelled to recreate it in a way that allows you to control it. It’s like you’re attracted to the very thing that bothered you because you’re not done with it- you need to fix that moment so you can move forward. Oscar Wilde said, ‘a burnt child loves fire.’ For me, that means being able to explore things that have been traumatic or you’re not so sure about. The sources of terror in childhood can become the sources of attraction in adulthood.” (todd hido, from “on landscapes, interiors, and the nude”)

5.

(ingmar bergman)

6. “This body knows fear like a front porch knows welcome—it is always coming home.” (brenna twohy, from “swallowtail”)

7. “I liked Hell. I like to go there alone relieved to lie in the wreckage, ruined, physically undone. The worst had happened. What else could hurt me then? I thought it was the worst, thought nothing worse would come. The nothing did, and no one.” (marie howe, from “magdalene: the addict)

#trauma /

@godskill ⠀said: ⠀“people ⠀ are ⠀ dicks.”

wouldn’t ⠀she ⠀know. ⠀social ⠀isolation ⠀& ⠀constant ⠀ frustration ⠀ felt ⠀ like ⠀ a ⠀ plague. ⠀ whether ⠀ the ⠀ plague ⠀ was ⠀ shadyside ⠀ or ⠀ people, ⠀ they ⠀ hadn’t ⠀ completely ⠀ decided. ⠀ realistically, ⠀ it ⠀ was ⠀ probably ⠀ both.

besides, ⠀ sunnyvalers ⠀ were ⠀ the ⠀ fucking ⠀ worst. ⠀ blaming ⠀ their ⠀ own ⠀ problems ⠀ (petty ⠀ thievery ⠀ this ⠀ time? ⠀ seriously? ⠀ what ⠀ emotional ⠀ loss ⠀ is ⠀ being ⠀ harbored ⠀ by ⠀ ten ⠀ fucking ⠀ dollars?) ⠀ on ⠀ ziggy ⠀ was ⠀ the ⠀ easy ⠀ way ⠀ out ⠀ for ⠀ them ⠀ — ⠀ the ⠀ counselors ⠀ don’t ⠀ do ⠀ shit ⠀ about ⠀ it ⠀ either. ⠀ in ⠀ fact, ⠀ the ⠀ only ⠀ one ⠀ who ⠀ seemed ⠀ to ⠀ genuinely ⠀ care ⠀ was ⠀ cheryl.

“ ⠀ yeah, ⠀ no ⠀ shit. ⠀ ” ⠀ her ⠀ countenance ⠀ conveys ⠀ a ⠀ vague ⠀ annoyance. ⠀ (which, ⠀ they ⠀ realize ⠀ is ⠀ unprecedented. ⠀ someone ⠀ is ⠀ being ⠀ cool ⠀ & ⠀ agreeing ⠀ with ⠀ you. ⠀ don’t ⠀ be ⠀ a ⠀ jerk ⠀ back.) ⠀ “ ⠀ they ⠀ come ⠀ from ⠀ sunnyvale ⠀ … ⠀ i’m ⠀ not ⠀ sure ⠀ i ⠀ would ⠀ expect ⠀ them ⠀ to ⠀ be ⠀ anything ⠀ but ⠀ complete ⠀ assholes. ⠀ ”

#godskill #cheryl n ziggy bonding moment i love to see it .#even if ziggy is relatively skeptical @ first #hope this is ok!!!!#ˀˀ ⠀ 𖤐 ༘ ⸝⸝ ⠀ 𖥻 ⠀ the ⠀book ⠀i ⠀read. ⠀ ʷʳⁱᵗⁱⁿᵍ .

sick of people trying 2 rationalize nick and ziggy being together in adult hood.

whether u like to accept it or not, he is the reason her sister is dead. there is no universe where ziggy would overlook that factor.

he lied to her in a moment of vulnerability about wanting to escape his life and his legacy while he was actively doing so. whether it was genuine, i’m not completely sure, but considering his actions afterwards, i’m assuming it’s not!

ziggy deserves ……. better than nick goode???? who is literally making deals with the devil to maintain corrupt power????

#uhhh anyways if i were ever gonna write with a nick goode it would probably end up w ziggy flaming him #or getting angry / frustrated with him @ the very least .#like i shipped them in 1978 too but damn #i keep seeing excuses 4 nick’s actions surrounding ziggy and it’s just #“nick really cared about her :(” & it’s the scene where he puts her life in danger to save his own ass .#stop dragging her into his whole family bullshit most of his decisions had NOTHING to do with her wellbeing #been meaning to write a meta about ziggy finding out the truth abt nick and y’all are making me angry enough to go through with this #if personals rb this post i stg

clairesbell

Fear Street Part 2: 1978 (2021)

#nobody speak to me #ˀˀ ⠀ 𖤐 ༘ ⸝⸝ ⠀ 𖥻 ⠀ ⁱ ʷⁱˢʰ ⠀ you ⠀ wouldn’t ⠀ say ⠀ that. ⠀ ᵈʸⁿ . ⠀ 𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐲

@campnightwings ⠀ said: ⠀ “see, ⠀ this ⠀ is ⠀ why ⠀ people ⠀ think ⠀ you’re ⠀ creepy.”

is ⠀ she ⠀ really ⠀ possessed ⠀ by ⠀ sarah ⠀ fier?

nobody ⠀ with ⠀ common ⠀ sense ⠀ actually ⠀ believes ⠀ she ⠀ is. ⠀ rumors ⠀ spread ⠀ like ⠀ wildfire. ⠀ especially ⠀ ones ⠀ at ⠀ the ⠀ expense ⠀ of ⠀ a ⠀ person ⠀ with ⠀ a ⠀ reputation ⠀ as ⠀ shitty ⠀ as ⠀ ziggy’s ⠀ is.

maybe ⠀ if ⠀ they ⠀ stopped ⠀ attacking, ⠀ (a ⠀ loose ⠀ description ⠀ of ⠀ what ⠀ she ⠀ was ⠀ doing. ⠀ sheila ⠀ & ⠀ her ⠀ stupid ⠀ friends ⠀ always ⠀ deserved ⠀ it) ⠀ the ⠀ rumors ⠀ would ⠀ go ⠀ away. ⠀ besides, ⠀ it ⠀ was ⠀ really ⠀ only ⠀ sunnyvalers ⠀ calling ⠀ her ⠀ a ⠀ witch. ⠀ who ⠀ gave ⠀ a ⠀ shit ⠀ what ⠀ they ⠀ thought?

they ⠀ knew ⠀ they ⠀ were ⠀ going ⠀ to ⠀ have ⠀ to ⠀ deal ⠀ with ⠀ cindy’s ⠀ reaction. ⠀ she ⠀ just ⠀ didn’t ⠀ expect ⠀ it ⠀ to ⠀ be ⠀ such ⠀ bullshit.

“ ⠀ seriously, ⠀ cindy? ⠀ you ⠀ too? ⠀ ” ⠀anger ⠀ is ⠀ the ⠀ only ⠀ discernible ⠀ emotion ⠀ in ⠀ their ⠀ delivery. ⠀ NO ⠀ MATTER ⠀ HOW ⠀ HARD ⠀ YOU ⠀ TRY, ⠀ YOU’LL ⠀ ALWAYS ⠀ BE ⠀ A ⠀ SHADYSIDER. ⠀ (she ⠀ just ⠀ wished ⠀ cindy ⠀ didn’t ⠀ try ⠀ so ⠀ fucking ⠀ hard.) ⠀

#campnightwings #this is very reminiscent of the conversations they have early on in the movie #having both the same conversation and completely different conversations at the same time #anyways i love them a lot #i hope this is okay #ˀˀ ⠀ 𖤐 ༘ ⸝⸝ ⠀ 𖥻 ⠀ the ⠀book ⠀i ⠀read. ⠀ ʷʳⁱᵗⁱⁿᵍ .

even as a child, i don’t think ziggy forgives nick for pretending to believe her in a moment of vulnerability. she tries to justify his actions, knowing he wouldn’t be taken seriously if he were to claim he believed her, but it’s not something she can just brush off.

#“i couldn’t talk to him anymore. not after that.”#it takes a lot for her to call him in the second movie #the one person who she thought would believe her pretends that he has no clue what she’s talking about #the only other person left at camp who she thought might have cared about her.#she’s not just going 2 brush that off. even if he “had to do it because of his family’s legacy”.#that man deserved to be carrie’d