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so judging by how astonished people are by it every time we explain it to anybody, it seems like my wife and I might really be onto something here

during the pandemic, we invented something we call "astronaut time."

when it's astronaut time, it's like we are two astronauts wearing the big helmets, moving around the station on totally separate tasks. one of us is outside the space station and one of us is inside the space station. our radios do not work and we have no way of communicating with each other. we might see each other through the lil porthole windows, but we ignore each other because we both have different things to do.

"astronaut time" is how we get total privacy when we live in the same apartment. I will pretend you don't exist. You will pretend I don't exist. we have a nonverbal, zero-contact signal for when astronaut time is over (usually "I'll draw a smiley-face on the whiteboard in the kitchen when I'm done"). No talking, stay out of each other's line of sight, we are actively avoiding each other, unless you are currently experiencing a medical emergency goodbye.

it has been. a godsend. imagine living with your partner and being able to close every single tab in your brain related to social interaction. no fear of being interrupted by a "hey, quick question--" or "sorry to bother you, but do you know where the scissors are?" or "did you want something to eat, too?" Once or twice a month, we look at each other lovingly, hold hands, and say "baby I think I need some astronaut time tonight," and the other person goes "okay cool. bye! have a nice night!" and nobody's feelings are hurt and we both go and have a lovely evening completely by ourselves.

like idk it's a small thing but it's made our lives so much nicer, so if you and your partner/roommate are both people who sometimes need total privacy in order to recharge, maybe try it

wizzard890

I'm the wife in question and I cannot recommend this enough. When I told my therapist about astronaut time, she asked if she could share it with the couples she councils, so even the professionals give it two thumbs up.

odinsblog

“Robert Pattinson showed up with iPhone voice recordings and had already nailed the voice for ‘THE BOY AND THE HERON’ before recording started. It was his first ever voice role and he finished in 2 days.” (source)

curioscurio

Oh he's going the Mark Hamill route then

batmanisagatewaydrug

being an adult and trying to be "responsible with my money" is so hard like literally what corners am I supposed to be cutting on this budget. what am I supposed to stop spending money on. my anxiety meds? food for my cats? impulsive takeout orders? spotify premium? patreon artists who draw huge throbbing monster dicks? all of these are completely necessary to maintain my quality of life.

batmanisagatewaydrug

I'm not going to put the person who left these tags on blast but

like actually don't ignore the monster dick part that very much IS a little joy. like idk a lot of people have engaged with this post with a tone of "heehoo obviously that last part is a silly goof goof joke" while also agreeing that people need whimsy and little treats to live and like. why not huge throbbing monster dicks? why can lovingly drawn indie porn not be a thing that we acknowledge as a treat? it's not less pure just because someone is jacking off to it, jacking off is also fun.

moth-the-man

Also, people who make monster dicks for a living want to be able to afford little treats too...

batmanisagatewaydrug

I'm not letting you hide the tags when you're being this correct

#as someone who has gotten to keep a close eye on sales#i personally know how when money gets tight its one of the first things people cut from their purchase list#we've done several refunds for people who ordered and realized it set them back more than they could afford because we get it#its just a little frustrating that everyone goes 'teehee monster dicks funny joke' about my literal livelihood

everyone support your local artisanal monster dick purveyors