Single Working Super Mom

You can do it all

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What was wrong with the old you?

Every time you read an article around New Year's Day, they suggest that there was something wrong with the "old you", as they offer endless tips on transforming yourself into the "new you" or the "better you".

Screw that. You are wonderful just as you are, and New Year's resolutions aren't meant to force you to do things you don't feel passionate about, or ways to list out your inadequacies in life. They are a chance to commit to doing the things you WANT to do this year. The dreams you've put on hold. A chance to actually "be you" for a change.

So don't set yourself up for failure this year. Make your resolutions all about making yourself happy. And be comfortable with the "old you". That's the "you" that everyone already loves and there's nothing better than that.

Happy New Year 2013

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You're always a role model to somebody.

Unknown

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The universe gives you what you put into it

We've all heard about "putting positive vibes out there" when we want something to happen. But it might be more than just a superstition. 

If you've ever read "The Secret", you'll know what I'm talking about. It's about creating your own reality by simply committing to envision it. 

Recently, my mom told me about a segment on Joel Olsen, where he basically said that when you verbalize negative thoughts, you are putting those thoughts into motion. The universe (or God, whichever you believe in) doesn't make good things happen when you're putting negative thoughts out there, because you're not ready to receive it. He went on to say that it's okay to think negative things, but you can't verbalize it. Only verbalize what you want to happen. 

For example, if you want to meet someone, don't say to everyone, "I give up, I'll never meet anyone." Instead, say, "My dream guy/girl is on his/her way". Another example is imagining your life, or situations, as you want them to be. If you want to buy a house, then envision yourself walking into it, what it smells like, what the furniture feels like. And do it often. 

A friend of mine recently gave me another book that breaks down the power of imagination to create your reality and it's called, "The Law and the Promise".

It's an interesting perspective -- so give it a look.

Good luck!

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Kids should do well for themselves, not you

As the school year is in full swing, and tests and report cards are arriving, it's important to figure out how you will deal with bad grades, as well as good ones. 

One of the most important lessons you can teach your kids is doing well to make themselves proud, not you. Of course you're proud when your kids do well in something, and you should definitely let them know, but they have to do well because it makes them feel good, not because they're afraid of getting in trouble.

Once they build a sense of self satisfaction for doing great, they're more likely to go the extra mile to do well in the future. So if and when a few bad tests or grades come home, don't blow up, don't say you're disappointed in them, ask them how it makes them feel. Ask them if they wish they had done better, and if they feel better about themselves when they bring home good grades. 

Chances are, you'll get the answers you want, and you'll be instilling self pride in your kids in the meantime.

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“Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.”

Erma Bomback

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It's time for the Elf to make his debut

If you've been fortunate enough to have "inherited" an elf during the month of December, then you know he has to make a lot of moves 25 to be exact, although our elf shows up the day after Thanksgiving, so it's actually 33.

For some funny inspiration, I found a great site of people taking photos of the crazy places their elves have started showing up.

http://elfontheshelfideas.com

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“We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”

 Frederick Keonig

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Help your kids figure out what they're really thankful for

It's common around most Thanksgiving tables to have people tell you what they are thankful for. And when it comes to the kids, they usually spit out whatever they hear everyone else saying. But do they really get it? Maybe. But here's a nice way to get them to think about it a little more, and the adults, too. We did it last year and it was lovely.

Print out a piece of paper in the shape of a leaf and put everyone's name on it who is at your table. Then pass each leaf around and have everyone write down what they are thankful for about that person specifically. After you eat your feast, go around and have each person read their leaf out loud.

It will warm their heart to know that they are not taken for granted, and that everyone around them is thankful for them for different reasons.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.

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Always kiss your children goodnight - even if they're already asleep.

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

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Kids excited about doing chores? Maybe!

If you've struggled with getting your kids to consistently do their chores and then got lax at some point, then you might just want to check this out.

Rather than trying to keep up with stars and charts on the fridge, this great new site called Chore Monster makes it fun, digital and might just be the answer to your prayers.

The site allows you to sign up all of your children, assign chores and points associated with doing them, and then what reward they'll get when they reach a number of points. Kids get their own log in info for recording their chores, then you get to approve them and they get the points. They can check their money bag for how many points they have and how close they are to their reward.

I just started it yesterday, but already my kids are doing their chores like clockwork and looking forward to logging in later tonight.

Hopefully the novelty of it won't wear off too quickly, but it's definitely better than anything I've come up with.

Check it out at choremonster.com

Good Luck!

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Every once in a while, you get a sign

As a parent, you do your best to try to instill good morals and values in your children. But when they're young, and it's still "all about them", it's hard to know if anything you are doing or saying is actually sinking in.

Well this weekend, I finally got a sign that something stuck. My 10 year old daughter decided she wanted to try something different with her hair (it's been long forever and her one feature that she has always loved). Of course I said okay, experimenting with your hair is one of the joys of being a girl. But what she asked after was what blew me away. She asked me if she could donate her hair to Locks of Love. 

Apparently she read about it in a kid magazine and thought it would be a really nice thing to do. She was concerned that she didn't have enough to donate, or that it would make her hair too short. So we measured and she has the 10 inches to give. I told her that she might have to go an inch or two shorter than she wanted to, and although she is a little scared, she said, "It'll grow back, some people don't have any."

So we're going next week to get it done and downloaded all the paperwork from Locks of Love. 

All I can say is how proud of her I am and it warms my heart to know that even when I think she's not looking or listening, she is. And she is turning out to be everything I could have ever hoped for in a daughter.

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The funny thing about kids...

They tend to get excited over all of the things that make us adults sigh in exhaustion. For example, being without power for 6 days during Hurricane Sandy was nothing short of mentally draining for the adults, but the kids had a blast. No school, no reason to get out of pajamas, playing board games, running around with flashlights. Sounds fun if you're not the one trying to keep everyone safe and warm and fed and in clean clothes despite the lack of power. Then this morning we woke up to almost a foot of snow, compliments of the NorEaster. Again, I was exhausted just looking at it, knowing the extra work that comes with all that pretty white fluff. But once again, my kids think this is GREAT! They ran out and made snow angels and had a snow ball fight, didn't care this morning that they were getting their boots soaked or tracking snow into the car. They thought it was cool when I almost couldn't back out of my parking spot and was swerving all over the place.

I guess my thought is, we adults need to let loose a little. Take a lesson from our kids and try to enjoy whatever life throws at us. No, we can't ignore our responsibilities, but if we can learn to mentally let go, even just a little, or for just a little while, we too might learn to enjoy life a little bit more.

So yes, you have to shovel your car out today, but when you're done, jump in it. You can always change your clothes and your boots will dry. 

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Keeping things in perspective during trying times

For many people trying to deal with the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, it's a rough road ahead. I myself am 5 days without power, and it's been hard sleeping because it's so cold. I have two little ones who are bored, frustrated, and don't quite get it. I know a lot of people who lost their homes, belongings, and have no jobs to go back to. But they are alive and safe now, and that really is all that matters.

If you have had no loss of life in your family, consider yourself blessed. Cars and homes and things can be replaced. Eventually, you will eat the food you want to eat, and have a warm roof over your head. But you are here. 

My prayers and thoughts go out to all those who have lost, and may you have the strength to continue. Be safe.

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“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”

 Helen Keller, author, political activist, and speaker

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Take it easy ladies.

We all know how stressed we are – there are never enough hours in a day. And as much as I am a big advocate of  “doing it all”, sometimes you just have to take a break.

A recent survey in Women’s Health Magazine revealed some interesting results that are proof that we ladies need to take it easy.

 What the average woman thinks about most often:

Her to-do list: 64%

Work: 13%

Food: 11%

Sex: 9%

Other: 3%

The average woman takes “mental health” day off from work:

Never: 32%

Once every few months: 25%

Once a month: 18%

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Laugh, don't cry.

Today started out as one of those days where everything that could go wrong did, and you  just wish you could go back to bed and start over tomorrow.

As each new hurdle was placed in my way, I noticed myself getting increasingly frustrated. I finally had to stop and take a step back, realizing that although it was a tough morning, the day just started, and I really didn't want to feel pissed off and negative for the rest of it.

Once I took the "why me?" lens off of it, I kind of found it funny. And decided to laugh at it, rather than cry about it.

So when you get one of those days, just keep moving and know that it's not just you, and in the grand scheme of things, it's not really that important. Find the humor in it and you'll make what could have been an entire rotten day, into simply a rotten morning that's already over with.

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Kids say the funniest things

The highlight of my Friday was something my kids said to me when I picked them up from school.

I told them I had some "exciting news" (which was about work), and the first thing out of their mouths, was 

"YOU HAVE A DATE?!!!!!!!"

Well, not that exciting I guess.