5 feet tall. @5feet-tall - Tumblr Blog

hydro-homies

She’s got a point.

robertmitchum

BILL NYE can’t stress the importance of Climate Change enough

kinkadinkyy-deactivated20251129

Bend it Like Beckham (2002) dir. Gurinder Chadha

just-shower-thoughts

Those “choose your own flavor” Coke machines are probably just there to gather marketing data; They see what the most popular flavors are so they can release bottled/canned versions.

sirfrogsworth

Now in convenient GIF form.

beardedchrisevans

Chris Evans for Men’s Journal 2019

okayysophia

He commented on the media’s reaction to him helping Regina King during the Oscars by saying “ the bar is so low…” and how what he did is the equivalent of saying bless you when someone sneezes😂😂😂

connerys

Beautiful girl, for you I’ve got a passion Beautiful girl, you’re my queen of fashion I’m in a whirl Over my beautiful girl

Singin’ in the Rain (1952) dir. Gene Kelly & Stanley Donen

theroncharlize

Steve “I’m too old for this s**t” Rogers

lokidokeyartichoki

I found a company called “Frantic Meerkat” who makes journals whose sole purpose is to call me out

hellenhighwater

This is by the Mincing Mockingbird guy (of “I’d sell you to satan for one corn chip” and “The risk I took was calculated, but man, am I bad at math” fame) and you can buy them here

https://www.mincingmockingbird.com/collections/frantic-meerkat

pervocracy

Note to vacationing non-Americans: while it’s true that America doesn’t always have the best food culture, the food in our restaurants is really not representative of what most of us eat at home. The portions at Cheesecake Factory or IHOP are meant to be indulgent, not just “what Americans are used to.”

If you eat at a regular American household, during a regular meal where they’re not going out of their way to impress guests, you probably will not be served twelve pounds of chocolate-covered cream cheese. Please bear this in mind before writing yet another “omg I can’t believe American food” post.

briarpatchfinn

Also, most American restaurant portions are 100% intended as two meals’ worth of food. Some of my older Irish relatives still struggle with the idea that it’s not just not rude to eat half your meal and take the rest home, it’s expected. (Apparently this is somewhat of an American custom.)

xenoqueer

Until you’re hitting the “fancy restaurant” tier (the kind of place you go for a celebration or an anniversary date), a dinner out should generally also be lunch for the next day. Leftovers are very much the norm.

From the little time I’ve spent in Canada, this seems to be the case up there as well.

jumpingjacktrash

the portions in family restaurants (as opposed to haute cuisine types) are designed so that no one goes away hungry.

volume IS very much a part of the american hospitality tradition, and Nobody Leaves Hungry is important. but you have to recognize that it’s not how we cook for ourselves, it’s how we welcome guests and strengthen community ties.

so in order to give you a celebratory experience and make you feel welcomed, family restaurants make the portions big enough that even if you’re a teenage boy celebrating a hard win on the basketball court, you’re still going to be comfortably full when you leave.

of course, that means that for your average person with a sit-down job, who ate a decent lunch that day, it’s twice as much as they want or more. that’s ok. as mentioned above, taking home leftovers is absolutely encouraged. that, too, is part of american hospitality tradition; it’s meant to invoke fond memories of grandma loading you down with covered dishes so you can have hearty celebration food all week. pot luck church basement get-togethers where the whole town makes sure everybody has enough. that sort of thing. it’s about sharing. it’s about celebrating Plenty.

it’s not about pigging out until you get huge. treating it that way is pretty disrespectful of our culture. and you know, contrary to what the world thinks, we do have one.

theunnamedstranger

derpomatic

So the “doggy bag” thing is real?

siryouarebeingmocked

Y-yes? Is it not overseas?

garrettauthor

Holy shit, this is the first thing in 760 days that has made me feel more positive about America.

lasafara

Not only is the doggy bag thing real, but some restaurants make it EVEN COOLER. Here in Portland, there’s a restaurant that will literally create a foil animal sculpture with your food inside. Like. We love sending people home with leftovers So Much that we want to make them Even More Special than just eating out itself was.

olderthannetfic

I’m dying that people don’t realize doggy bags are a real thing. Even fancy restaurants treat that as normal and expected, even if one doesn’t usually need one because the portions are smaller. The only fancy places that look askance at taking home leftovers are ones that are trying to be more foreign as a fashion thing.

Many restaurants have branded bags and boxes with the restaurant’s name on them.

When Americans eat crap, it’s often more about food deserts and a complete lack of reasonable public transportation than about our restaurants having insane portions.

A food desert is an area with no supermarkets or grocers where the only place that sells food is a convenience store with twinkies. It’s very common to not live within walking distance of a place that sells ingredients. In the suburbs, it’s normal to not only live outside of reasonable walking distance of food but also for that distance to be a huge highway with nowhere you’re legally allowed to walk. From conversations with friends, this sounds relatively uncommon in most countries. Every place has some farms in the middle of nowhere, but US style suburbs aren’t the norm.

Meanwhile, at least in some areas, we tend to have a lot of storage space, so it’s common to go to the supermarket only occasionally and stock up for the week/month with things that will keep. We’re not usually buying 800 servings at once because we’re actually going to eat all that right now.

The way normal people shop for fresh vegetables a lot of places just isn’t possible in big chunks of the US, and it’s very much a class thing.

bitter-badfem-harpy

I’m kind of surprised no one brought this up yet but as a culture we had this huge economic disaster about eighty years ago paired with an androgenic ecological disaster in this big portion of the middle of the country that caused widespread famine and starvation

cantanopeshitthatwastaken

on the leftovers thing, if you’re only visiting for a short time (and thus wont be able to use any leftovers), try agreeing to order one meal to share with whoever you’re at the restaurant with, instead of each of you getting your own meal. It definitely shows off the portionability of almost all restaurant food. 1 meal per 2 to 3 people should work without creating any leftovers.

The first thing I usually do when I get a burger is cut it down the middle and decide which half I’m going to eat, and which I’m going to save for a rainy day. Then, I divide the side-food in a similar way (be it fries, vegetables, or whatever). If I’m visiting the south, known for its hardy portions (texas, alabama, etc), I’ll actually divide it further, eating (for example) only half (or less) of the burger, and none of the fries– which means it becomes 3-4 days of lunches… for the family I’m staying with. Yes. You can give your leftovers to someone else. In fact, it’s considered really kind, if they like that kind of food. And since they’re usually the ones that took you to the restaurant, it may even be their favorite type of food.

Food is really a sign of affection, in every possible way, from the trope of “mother’s day means serving mom breakfast in bed” to “cutting the wedding cake is one of the most important wedding photos” to “one of our holidays literally has kids running up to every house in town in costume to ask for candy” to “BBQ sauces are a generationally-passed-down tradition.”

It’s not about the food itself, the food is a symbol of working (or paying) for an experience that your loved ones will enjoy. It’s the stubborn grandmas remembering the great depression. It’s the parents that remember eating fish cakes and stewed tomatoes in 1965, and deciding to make something edible instead. It’s the inexperienced kids handing their parents a gross bowl of shredded cheese and cheerios because they want to show that affection and haven’t figured out how to do it right yet.

beeperbopper

There’s a restaurant in DC that specifically, as part of its menu, gives you an equal portion of specific “traditional” foods to take home. They’re packaged separately and half-baked so they reheat well when you get home.

If you have a potluck with friends, it’s perfectly normal to leave your leftovers of whatever dish you brought with the hosts, as a thank you for them hosting. It’s also perfectly normal, if you are hosting friends for a traditional meal like thanksgiving, to give them some of the leftovers to take home with them (like your grandma would do).

kazoomusic

I recently hosted a big dinner, and one friend couldn’t come at the last minute. So I brought her leftovers the next day anyway, because that’s one big way Americans show we care.

In many areas it is an actual thing to make friends with new neighbors by going over and introducing yourself with a plate of cookies or pie. If I go to a dinner at someone else’s house, the very first thing I ask after getting the invite is “what can I bring?” because it shows i’m not an ungrateful guest. And if they say “nothing,” I’ll probably still bring a bottle of wine or something.

kazoomusic

I’m gonna reblog again because I realised I forgot something huge.

It’s tradition, across the US, that when your friends help you move, you repay them with pizza. This is usually because pizza is easy to order in when everyone’s tired and most people like it (so you could theoretically replace it with chinese or something), but the fact is we repay kindness with food. And it’s very specifically, always food. It can’t be replaced with buying them a drink down at the bar or something. Someone helped you out and showed they care by sacrificing time and effort for you? You show your appreciation with food.

no-lo-lo

Food = love

beyhive4ever

“what are we doing?”

They both know they got too much money to be blowing bubbles

buffysummers

stability

thiswaycomessomethingwicked

This is why I strongly advocate for an alien invasion movie but set in like 1142. The Anarchy is in full swing.

it’d be so good. Everyone would map theological explanations of the aliens onto them. It’d be so much fun.

Aliens: Take us to your leader. Jocelyn, Peasant: All right. Um, which one? Are you for King Stephen or the Empress Maude? Aliens: Um– Jocelyn: I recommend Empress Maude. King Stephen is a lying usurper. Aliens: All right, Empress Maude. Take us to her. Jocelyn: I always new God was on our side. Aliens: Jocelyn: You’re angels right? Come to bring us portends and tidings of the divine? Aliens: Or to massacre you. Jocelyn: That makes sense. We’re very sinful. We deserve whatever punishment it is God has seen fit to bestow upon us. Aliens: Aliens: Aliens: Wow.