2x01-2x07 were phenomenal. Here's a rant about how the finale was a disgrace.
It is abundantly clear to me that the integrity of the show has suffered tremendously from the budget cuts and squeezing what should have been ten episodes into only eight.
I don’t point the blame to the cast or writers because this is a major issue of circumstance. I would imagine that David Jenkins is probably more pissed than all of us combined right now. Because he's better than this, the cast is better than this and the writers are better than this.
Even the acting in this episode was wooden. None of the characters felt like themselves. There was no humor, no funny one liners, no chemistry, no emotion, no... nothing. It was bleak and dull.
Every single key plot line was rushed and handled with little care, if none at all. It kind of had to be thrown at us all at once with only seconds for us to process before moving along to the next thing.
Ed failing to be a fisherman and returning as Blackbeard, miraculously finding his leathers at the bottom of the fucking ocean and speed reading through Stede's letter .... what the fuck even was that? We were given more screen time of Stede writing the damn letters than Ed actually reading it for there to be any emotional impact. The most monumental part of Ed's character arch thus far in the story condensed in literally two minutes.
The 'I Love You' scene was a total disservice to Ed and Stede's love story. Both Ed's dream and Stede's dream were more emotional and romantic. This is the big moment we all have been waiting for and it completely fell flat. Like I didn't even care. Oh no, Zheng needs help... whelp I guess that is more important. Moving right along.
I felt as though Zheng and Auntie were prioritized more in this episode than the rest of the characters. Don't get me wrong, I like them both as secondary characters but I hated how they were overshadowing the crew. I know that Zheng's desire for revenge on the Navy was setting up for the major plotline of season 3 but there were more important moments that needed more screen time.
Izzy's death was entirely unnecessary. I would have only been accepting of his death if he went out in a blaze of glory like a total badass, saving the crew one last time. Maybe that was the original plan if we had episodes 2x09 and 2x10. What we got instead reeks of fucking budget cuts. I almost felt like we just traded Con O'Neill's salary for Ruibo Qian's. I know it sounds like I have something against Zheng and Ruibo. I want to clarify that I don't at all. I think she's an excellent addition to the cast but so much of this finale felt like it made room for her at the expense of the other major characters.
Izzy Hands is the very soul of Our Flag Means Death and in his final moments he was reduced to a plot device for Ed. I can't tell you how fucking disgusting that was to watch. Izzy, who was mentally and physically abused by Ed, is apologizing to him "for feeding the darkness." Talk about victim blaming. Damn right, he's the one who shouldn't be apologizing. Also when Ed said that Izzy was his only family was so cringey considering how poorly he's treated him since season one.
I think the conversation that Ed and Izzy have while he's drawing his last breath should have been the conversation they had in 2x07 rather than the nonchalant "sorry about your leg". Now that would have been more beneficial to both of their redemption arcs.
Stede and Ed becoming inn keepers was detrimental to Stede's story arch. Stede's dream is to be a legendary pirate and no matter how in love he may be with Ed, we never once saw them have a healthy and mature conversation about both of their desires and plans for the future to convince me that this is what he wants. For neither Stede or Ed to be on the Revenge with their crew at the end was more heartbreaking to me than Izzy's death and you know that's bad when I'm the biggest Izzy stan.
Once again, Izzy's death feels like it happened to accommodate Zheng. Izzy should have become the captain of the Revenge. His speech about piracy not being about glory but belonging to something should have foreshadowed his transition from first mate to captain. He's the one who loves the crew, who protects them, who bonds with them. He's not a follower anymore and he's not living in Blackbeard's shadow. He's the NEW FUCKING UNICORN. He's THEIR DICK. Did that not mean anything? Why throw all of that away so carelessly?
I believe that the intention of Izzy's death was to motivate Ed to seek out revenge on the Navy, possibly to make him want to retire from innkeeping and return as Blackbeard come the third season. Honestly, I have no clue what the game plan is anymore because let's be real, Ed didn't care about Izzy when he was abusing him and now you're going to tell me he cares enough to avenge his death.
The funeral was so casual and then Ed calling Izzy a nightmare... are you fucking kidding me? Was that supposed to pass off as a joke? I wasn't fucking laughing.
I was sadder about Izzy's death before I watched the episode because I saw the spoilers and I knew it was coming. When it actually happened, I hardly felt anything at all. It was so rushed and out of place that even Con and Taika's amazing acting couldn't even get me to buy it.
Calypso had a better birthday party than Lucius and Black Pete's wedding. Now that was some bullshit. I was anticipating more of an extravagant celebration. If the writers knew they didn't have time to give them a proper wedding in the finale, then why not have just made 2x06 about their wedding instead of the crew coming up with a reason to party? The whole episode could have been exactly the same with Izzy singing and everyone dressing up and the fireworks and Ed and Stede making love for the first time and even Ned Lowe's attack, except it would have just been their wedding.
Also did Ricky die? Did he escape? Like I have no recollection of what even happened to him. That's how rushed everything felt.
The only thing I did like was seeing Spanish Jackie sailing on the Revenge at the end. She is one of my favorite characters, so I was happy to see her with The Swede, safe and sound. Imagine that being the best part of the finale of everything else that could have been great.
I don't know what else to say. I still love the show but the finale really fucked everything up for me. My word of advice is don't even bother making season 3 if it's going to be slopped together like those last thirty minutes of this season was. What a fucking disgrace.
Our Flag Means Death is too precious to its audience, cast and crew to be disrespected like this. All of us deserve better, especially Izzy Hands.
