affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them

Love Begins

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almost home

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if i look back, i am lost
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

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@90s-twink
affirmations they will not kill me at work today. it is not in my job description to get killed. if they did kill me at work that would be weird and probably not worth it for them
Has this been done yet?
Have you guys seen that clip
Go off Kermit
we're just normal men
Why the heck is this dude trying to confirm if the frog puppet is hetrosexual???
assessing the situation before he shoots his shot
Happy Pride to Kermit the Frog, questioning king
love that they all look like they’re heading to separate functions. like. singles night on a caribbean cruise, ex’s funeral, dive bar with a mechanical bull, english department end-of-year reception, & the bus stop, respectively.
why so silent good messieurs
I’m SEVERELY disappointed this post didn’t include the eye witness statement of the mirror crash incident in question
My brain for whatever reason just very easily bends around weird concepts. idk if it’s from reading surrealism so much or the adhd or being stuck on tumblr for too long or whatever but so often someone will be like “wow that is so weird how do they come up with that” and it’s just like pretty standard absurdist humor or something and I’m like idk they were probably just staring at a wall and wondered what would happen if you nailed a tomato to it don’t we all do that
Shout out to trans women who aren’t computer scientists or musicians or avant-garde artists or whatever.
Shout-out to tgirls who work at Taco Bell. Thank u queen, society would collapse without you
Over twenty years ago my big brother got me a job at a Taco Bell in the St. Louis suburbs-West County. He warned me that it was the “gay Taco Bell”, but since I was coming from the “gay Howard Johnson’s” I wasn’t shocked. It turns out it was the black trans women Taco Bell complete with black trans women in management. And they’d worked out an arrangement with the local teen Narcotics Anonymous group so that twice a week we would shut down the drive thru and the dining room and exclusively serve 60+ teens in various stages of recovery. And many of the women I worked with were in various stages of being out or transitioning and they were from all generations from teens to over 50. One woman I worked with had a regular corporate job presenting as a man 9-5 Mon-Fri and then came to Taco Bell and worked 6pm -2am Friday and Saturday night so she could be herself surrounded by other black transwomen in those stolen weekends. And we had customers come from all over the metro area because they knew they could be themselves in the dining room. I only worked there from 1999-2001 but for young me, this was a vital, formative experience. Some of the girls came from north city all the way out to the “gay Taco Bell” on Manchester in west county because they heard it was safe to work there. Like- I know times have changed but they haven’t changed much in 20 years. I’m still convinced that for lgbt youth, finding a job at your city’s version of the “gay Taco Bell” is key to survival.
Thank u for sharing this with us
Happy Mother's Day to these two
petition to change LGBT to DFTQ (Dykes Faggots Trannies and Queers, naturally)
AMENDED
happy pride everyone
blue raspberry is fucked up cause it doesn't make sense but then u taste it and it Does taste like if a raspberry was blue
someone should write a pmh situation where rocky is trying to tell grace that he loves him and grace doesn’t understand and is using a bunch of other words to describe it till rocky gets mad and grace has to describe what the word love means and rocky just says it over and over to him and then goes ‘grace love earth earth love grace eridian love grace everything love grace’ and grace sobs
“Why they made you all sleep, question?”
“Aw, you know, they expected we’d kill each other. It’s a long way to Tau Ceti.”
“Long way to Erid now. No kill me, please! - Is joke. Am too strong for you.”
“Heh. Yeah you are. Don’t wanna kill you, anyway. I’m - really glad you’re here.”
“Glad too. Mm. Need word.”
“For?”
“Gives good feeling.”
“Like. You like it.”
“Rocky like Grace.”
“Oh. Oh, I like you too, Rock.”
***
“Grace is tired.”
“'m ok, bud. Wanna do a couple more calculations now we’re past the asteroid belt, make sure Mary has our new trajectory nailed down.”
“Ship puts nails in flight path, question?”
“Earth saying.”
“Grace is yawning. All teeth, open throat, look scary. Many times now. Math will be wrong.”
“Yeah, fine, maybe I am tired. What about a movie before bed? You, me, laptop?”
“Watch Atlantis with explorer Thatch.”
“Third time! You really like that one.”
“Is good movie...Grace say ‘like’ for self and for movie. Is too soft word. Need stronger one.”
“Ah. Um. Stronger?”
“Feeling stronger for person. Grace is important.”
“R-respect? Person you take seriously.”
“Rocky feel respect for Grace. Come rest, give respect to brain.”
“Ha. Well. I respect you too, um, a lot, really.”
“Is very good. Show Milo Thatch go on adventure, find friend, get brave.”
***
“Exosuit will be finished soon. Then I can help you like Earth crew would. Help you get better.”
“You help me plenty. I'm just mopey. Um. Homesick, not actually sick. Not your fault.”
“Is actually sick. Thinking machine says humans social animals, need pack, get sick like this when they are not touched. You need hugs and cuddles. Exosuit will make me better crewmate.”
“You’ve always been the best crewmate. You know, I respected my crew, and I guess they respected me, but I never felt I belonged with them. I remember that now. I liked them, but I was lonely with them. Not like with you. ”
“Respect does not mean belonging, question?”
“No – um, no, not really. Means you give weight to what they say, who they are.”
“You don’t have weight. You are light like hatchling.”
“No, that’s – Hey.”
“Teasing you.”
“Yeah, got that. I’m a hatchling?”
“I could lift you, one hand, easy. You are baby. Need new word.”
“For?”
“Person you feel strongly for. More than respect. Belong together. Good to travel a long time together. Still know they are kind when they tease. Feel better with them near.”
“That’s – that’s trust. That’s – yeah.”
“Yes, Rocky trust Grace.”
“Thank you. Um.”
“Finish this exosuit, pick you up in one hand, okay. Show you are baby.”
“Fine. Fine, I trust you too. You finish that thing and you can throw me around all you want.”
***
“So. You like your house?”
“Oh, my God, Rocky. This – this is incredible.”
“The door is good?”
“I really like the door, bud.”
“The bed is too soft?”
“No, it’s great. I know it’s not how you guys sleep, not firm enough to perch properly on, but soft is heaven for sleepy humans.”
“Good, good. Come in here. Surprise! Sprouts from the ship growing in the ‘sunroom.’ Shaped like the don’t go crazy room, huh? But the plants are real this time, see?”
“God, they’re real. This is real. This is – tell Adrian, tell everyone, top-notch human habitat. Incredible choices. You even brought Armando.”
“Good good good. We worried – you might not feel at home here.”
“You really were worried, huh? C’mere, fist bump. Of course I feel at home. Nobody ever worked this hard to set up a habitat for me. Man, and I used to wish Earth hadn’t trusted me so much. Never ever thought I’d make it like this. If five-year-old Grace could see me now! I live in space in a space house and my best friends are space aliens!”
“You are our best alien friend. But you say trust. Earth ‘trusted’ you?”
“Crazy, isn’t it?”
“But they sent you away. They can ‘trust’ and still force you to go?”
“Yeah. Yeah, if the job needs doing.”
“Mm. Hate that. Need a word.”
“What kind of word?”
“Something more than trust. Would not send you away. Would keep you close as long as you are happy. Would feel what you feel – would feel everything together.”
“Love. That’s – love.”
“Rocky love Grace.”
“Oh. O-oh.”
“Love, love, love Grace. Grace – you are crying? You are okay?”
“I’m good, Rock. I’m so good.”
“Love you. Always love. Could hug if you would sit down. Too soft to hug standing – will knock you over. No stronger than a hatchling. Yes, good, thank you. Hugs make you cry more?”
“Make me this happy, pal, that’s just how it goes. I’m going to sit here and cry on your shiny little exosuit, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
“Could pick you up with one hand.”
“But you won’t. You’ll let me cry all over you. Because you love me.”
“Leaky human.”
“Love you. Love you, Rock. Love you too.”
#grace thought the universal language was math. he was wrong.
#it’s love. it’s always love
MARI YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE THIS IN THE TAGS 😭😭😭
rpf actually stands for red pepper flakes
As a transsexual woman 👩 who has had multiple experiences ‼️ I have found 🔎 that the biggest block of cheese 🧀 is usually the one ☝️ that has the largest size 📈
mature content
”you are a lawyer he is a hamster” 😭😭😭😭
Losing my mind rn
I see we're learning about the flaming hot cheeto earthquake proof sarcophagus again
Humans are humans and have always been humans, so i GOTTA wonder how many archeology finds we have that are basically a prehistoric version of this.
There's the one cave with "this is really high," written well above where anyone can reach. Until they were able to actually get up there and translate it people assumed it was something of deep spiritual significance for people to have made the kind of effort required to write it. But no. It was this. Thousands of years before this video, some guy decided to do what amounts to the same thing.
How many of these absolute treasures will never be found? Now THAT is the true legacy of mankind if you ask me. Hours and hours of effort put into elaborate jokes that will never actually be seen but gave the creator the joy that only comes from messing with other humans.