a regular bi-angle

[segamascott]

can't believe it took them 13 seasons

[libraryfag]

hi my name is dark yagami and my goal is to give birth to billions of people

[parkchanwoohoo]

I saw a post on a terf blog before I blocked it from someone being like "Ummm is anybody else really concerned about the rise of antisocial kinks like pissing" and it made me laugh so hard I almost did a little antisocial kink myself

[pangur-and-grim]

I can hoist my niece and nephew pretty easily right now, but I have to keep lifting weights bc they’ll continue to grow and I will not allow them to outscale my ability to toss them in the air and go “wheeeeeeee!”

[victusinveritas]

[black-crested-jaybird]

I always think of the description I saw years ago: Self-imposed deadlines don't help me, because I know the person who set them, and they're full of shit.

[ozempicofficial]

[northshorewave]

Handing the Google executive currently chained in my basement a piece of paper that reads "Shall I end your torture?" with one checkbox that reads "No" and another that reads "Maybe later."

[andhumanslovedstories]

A patient, explaining what their relationship is to their new visitor who was headed up to see them, said, “he’s my guardian,” and I said “oh I didn’t you had a legal guardian,” and the patient said, “he’s not my legal guardian, he’s my spiritual and physical guardian. He is also my brother. Well, I say he’s my brother. He’s like a brother. He’s my husband.” And I say this with genuinely no judgment, just pure curiosity, what

[thethirdromana]

The worst types of cookbook:

The Ottolenghi - it is vital that you use 1g of this very expensive ingredient. It comes from a 500g bag with a one-week shelf life.

The time machine - 15-minute recipe! First, leave to marinate overnight...

The dishwasher - one-pot recipe! Now decant your ingredients and wipe out your pot. And again. And again. And again.

The optimist - cook the onions until caramelised (2 minutes).

The kindergarten teacher - get one nommable little tree of broccoli and bosh that into boiling water. Delish!

The brand names only - ingredients: Ritz crackers, Philadelphia cheese, Cool Whip, orange Jell-o...

The 1950s palate - use one (1) clove of garlic and a small pinch of chili flakes (omit if preferred).

The why bother with a cookbook - to make beans on toast, gently heat a tin of beans and put on top of freshly buttered toast.

[kosmogrl]

[kylieminvogue]

"STAR TREK" S1E15 - “Shore Leave”

[vee-dmsr]

[wizardarchetypes]

they should invent a grief that doesn’t define you in new and strange ways for the rest of your life

[wizardarchetypes]

[l3thalp3tal]

[screenshotsofdespair]

[retrowar]

[qsy-complains-a-lot]

[jay-jay-gone]

Are you proud of yourself? Are you happy you made this?

[qsy-complains-a-lot]

Oh you have no idea.

[were-ralph]

this made me laugh so hard i started choking and gasping for air 

[unalivejournal]

Ok. What you're gonna want to do is chop up a cucumber and put it in a bowl. Then you're gonna sprinkle a generous portion of salt on top. Then you're gonna drizzle them with a balsamic vinaigrette and gently shake to combine, leaving you with a cool and refreshing summer snack. In 15 seconds dangerous and burly men are going to drag me away to an unknown second location. Remember everything I've taught you. I love you