Hello, one and all!!! If you follow me, don't expect any posts regularly, but know that I like Alan Becker content, the Smiling Critters, and object shows!!!
This would have had me crucified on tumblr 10 years ago but maybe we are ready for this conversation now:
If you are a socially anxious person, you have to socialize. Your panic/anxiety attacks will only get worse and trigger more frequently if you constantly avoid contact with The Public. Not saying that you need to be a social butterfly- but there is a genuine problem with not being able to order your own meal at a restaurant. And it cannot be solved by always having someone else do it for you.
This is a PSA to about 3/4s of the Portland Youth populace
everyone who reblogs this and is like "I ordered my own tea this week" or "I only barfed once when I had to give a presentation'- you are doing amazing sweetie. Have patience with yourself, you are relearning a skill so difficult that people get 4 year degrees to do it professionally.
This is absolutely true. I was so socially anxious as a child and teenager that I barely spoke and avoided socializing as much as possible. I would practically pass out from fear over presentations and I constantly had physical symptoms of high stress.
Going to college and finding people who liked me(loved me) as I was, awkwardness, autism, and all, helped tremendously, but to find them, I first had to make the conscious, terrifying decision to Be Social. It was hard, so fucking hard, but it got easier. This was definitely my Fake It Til You Make It era.
Now, over a decade later, my job is literally to give training presentations, sometimes to hundreds of people at once. It's still a little scary, but I have the confidence of years of success now. Progress is hard and at first it will come in small, hard-won bursts, but it's 1000% worth it. Be brave. Do it scared. But do it for yourself, current and future.
The crux of the anti trans movement is a war on bodily autonomy. They don't want you to have any agency over what you look like, how you dress, who you date, whether to have kids, etc.
They want total control over you. Not just trans people. Not just queer people. You. Everyone.
Trans people are just a scapegoat. They want total control over everyone's self expression. They want the right to mold you into their perfect little cog in their dehumanizing machine.
Happy Trans Day of Visibility. Our rights are your rights. Our destruction is your destruction.
*slaps top of funtime foxy* yes, michael. this pink and white version of your favorite animatronic is what i see when i look at you. yeah i see a fucking drag queen, michael. i feel like i'm going to puke rainbows every time i stand next to you. i only see an f-slur. no i'm not going to say it because i can't reclaim it. what do you mean "dad you seem like you could". i am not queer, michael.
This clearly implies that the "it would not end well" refers to abstraction, because in this digital world, it is clearly the only thing that can have an impact + given Caine's panic reaction to the mention of Scratch…
Now what we need to understand is the process of abstraction.
How is it going?
It's not that complicated, we had the answer since episode 5.
Are you going to tell me that they are going crazy? Exactly. Because of looking for an exit? In part. But...
THIS IS MAINLY BECAUSE OF CAINE'S MIND CONTROL.
Think about it:
Who have we seen get mind controlled ?
Gangle, Ragatha and Jax.
Now who did we think they were going to abstract bc of how much it was bad afterwards?
Gangle, Ragatha and Jax.
His mind control always ends badly:
Pomni Pilot: forget his name —> Pomni seems to go crazy at the end of the episode
Gangle episode 4: being maniac and overreact bc of her mask —> commit suicide at the end of the episode
At the same time Ragatha takes stupid sauce in the eye, gets drunk —-> Sad and worried during episode 5 and 6
Episode 6, Zooble takes stupid sauce —> more irritating at the beginning of episode 7 (not much because they were exposed to it for a shorter duration where she is used to drinking)
Jax: Became vegan for 1 whole episode + is drunk during the bar scene + Kaufmo's recent "death"=
If you have noticed it now congratulations !
Caine's mind control has the same effect as LSD (powerful hallucinogenic drug) the more they take the worse effects:
Visual Hallucinations: Distortions in how you perceive colors, shapes, and patterns. Objects might seem to move, breathe, or have "trails." Colors may appear more vivid or change.
Increased Heart Rate and Blood Pressure: These are common side effects but usually not dangerous for healthy individuals. + Physical Discomfort: Nausea, dizziness, and headaches can also occur.
Euphoria: Many people feel a sense of extreme joy, connection, or spiritual insight + Emotional Swings: Emotions can be heightened, leading to feelings of intense joy or sometimes anxiety or paranoia. If you’re not in a positive environment, this can lead to a "bad trip." + Deeper Introspection: Many people report feeling a stronger sense of self-awareness or gaining new perspectives on personal issues, relationships, or life in general.
Synesthesia: Some individuals experience a mixing of the senses, such as "seeing" sounds or "hearing" colors. + Increased Sensitivity to Light and Sound: Lights may appear brighter, and sounds may seem amplified or distorted.
Distorted Sense of Time: Time can feel stretched or warped, with hours feeling like minutes or vice versa.
Altered Thought Processes: Thought patterns can become fragmented, and logical thinking might break down. Some may experience profound philosophical or spiritual insights, while others may feel confused or disoriented.
Anxiety or Paranoia: Some people may experience intense fear, confusion, or a sense of losing control. + Psychosis: Though rare, high doses of LSD can trigger psychosis or exacerbate existing mental health conditions.
Dilated Pupils: One of the hallmark signs of LSD use.
Afterglow: The period after the effects wear off can feel like a heightened sense of well-being, with some people reporting clarity of thought or emotional calm.
Or Flashbacks: In rare cases, individuals may experience flashbacks. These are usually short-lived and occur without warning.
Re-experiences: spontaneous, brief, and usually uncontrollable sudden re-experience of some of the effects days, weeks, or even months after taking LSD
Also LSD Colors:
Background Colors:
So abstraction appears when mental control leads to too intense psychological experiences.
Kaufmo doesn't just try to escape, he tries to remember that he doesn't want to stay in the circus and that Caine is manipulating him.
Caine knows it.
That why he was panicking
But he can control it everytime.
As we saw with the NPCs who encouraged him during episode 6 awards, or when Abel convinced Jax to go diner with Caine and ask him about his hobbies (otherwise he would not have reacted so much)
He probably doesn’t do it on purpose on Jax this time and that probably the first time this happens by accident.
I think that the first time (when Jax almost abstracted), seeing that he had not come to the adventure, he probably hoped that he was doing well, that he was happy which accidentally led to hallucinations.
The second time (the flashbacks) Caine probably hoped too much that at least one of the members of the circle chose to stay, and this fell on Jax, because he is the closest member to Caine, even more bc to the dinner.
That's why he was first surprised and worried about Jax before panicking because of the "accusations"
How it works: each week, I will post a round of polls. The winning votes will decide the fate of the show. It will probably be bad. I wanted to do it anyway.
**DISCLAIMER: NO ONE WILL ACTUALLY BE PRODUCING THIS SHOW. THERE WILL BE NO MONEY INVOLVED. THIS IS ALL HYPOTHETICAL**
At first I started to think they were dropping the whole plot line of Nickel feeling lonely after his BFDIA 16 win, but between his line about having no friends and his desire to replace someone popular and well-liked, my hope has been rekindled. One day Nickel will have character development…
I always love seeing this comic because it interprets Tumblr as a gigantic theater ruled by absolute chaos where sometimes somebody just stands up on their chair and shouts and we all pay attention
fun fact antidepressants can cause low sodium levels.
when i was on them, i didnt know this, and my parents hated that i craved salt because “salt is unhealthy”, so i didn’t get enough–and blacked out and got dizzy a LOT.
if ur on antidepressants make sure to get enough salt!! i know media says salt=bad but i promise your body needs it!!
“I’ve been blacking out constantly” is not a sentence you should be saying! this is bad! not good! bad for your health! you people always make me concerned!
Collinlock16 continuity. I have thoughts. Assimilandre thoughts. Ramble below
Okay so I LOVE the idea of assimilandre. The problem is i dont think Andre is currently conscious </3 i hc Andre is a system, and while Sidi is conscious, nobody else rlly is. Or at least, not entirely. They;re conscious enough to realize who they are. Not conscious enough to go against their programming. I see lots of people showing assim and Andre kissing, and I LOVE it. I think that assim should initiate the first kiss though. I think it would be REALLY CUTE If the thing that makes the system as a whole realize they don’t just want to follow their programming is kissing assim <3 and it opens their eyes.
They realize like. Oh my god. We don’t just want to speed run. Theres so much more to life. We don’t have to be what we were programmed to be. I don’t want to speed run. I want to run off with assim and live with him forever
The idea that in a fit of assim trying to get Andre to understand why assim doesn’t want to be what he was made to be, or do what he was made to do, assim can’t find the words for it. So he just kisses Andre. He pulls back immediately like ohmygodwhatthefuckdidijustdo and Andre realize. He is more than code. He is a living being. And he loves assim. GUYS DO YOU SEE IT. IT COULD BE SO CUTE. IT COULD BE SO CUTE. IT WOULD BE AMAZING.
getting lost in boston is fun because I turned around on a street corner three times and some guy yelled "hey stupid! the bus is that way!" very helpful interaction and accurate insult, 10/10 no notes
one time I walked around a building a couple times looking for a bathroom and this guy went "this bitch thinks she's on a merrygoround, where the fuck are you tryna go? bathroom? one floor down to the right behind the door that says bathroom."
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