memory (hiatus)

[xidchanwoo-deactivated20180608]

° heart to heart

[acachansik-blog]

acasana:

sana nodded her head, completely agreeing, but also thinking that it might be hard for them to cover every little moment. “i mean, we could ask my sister and my brother too,” she pointed out. they had both become quite good with jaejin in the short time in which he had joined their family. however, because they were family too, it meant that she actually did trust them, as opposed to a random friend of hers ( many of whom were trustworthy as well but she was less worried about yuta or momo dropping jaejin ).

“okay,” she murmured but soon was disrupted. “i think he’s hungry,” she noted, moving towards the couch. “can you get the bottle?” she had prepared one earlier, knowing that she would likely have to feed him soon. she couldn’t believe that such a little person could need to eat so much, but she presumed that what they ate was certainly not enough to be filling. “poor baby,” she cooed, bouncing him up and down just a little as she waited for his bottle to come.

It was at times like this that Chansik wished that he had a sibling. They would be able to help him with their dilemma. He knew that he could ask his parents to assist him, but due to their hectic lifestyle he doubted that they would have time to even take care of their grandson.

As he heard Sana’s request, Chansik headed over towards the counter where he last saw the bottle. He offered the bottle to Sana as he watched the two of them. Taking a step closer, he caressed Jaejin’s arm. “Didn’t you feed him earlier?” He asked, wondering why Jaejin was hungry all of a sudden. A sigh came out of his lips as his attention shifted between Jaejin and Sana.

“Sana, do you think that the school can make some accommodations for us?” He asked his girlfriend, wondering if it was possible. He had heard about a few schools and how they would help individuals who were parents, but he was unsure if such a thing would be applied to Bidulgi. “Maybe if we tell one of the staffs about our situation, they might make adjustments so that we don’t have to worry about having conflicting schedules.”

[xidchanwoo-deactivated20180608]

° heart to heart

[acachansik-blog]

acasana:

sana listened to her fiancé and nodded her head. she wanted to be a good mother, but she also wanted to live her life. it was a regret that she faced everyday ( and yet, not a regret all at the same time ). “i know,” she murmured, sighing softly. “i think …. we’ll need to figure out a plan though. either our class schedules need to alternate days, or we need to have someone to watch jaejin.” she didn’t like the idea of having a random person watching her son. she wondered if her siblings would be okay to watch him for a few hours here and there, but she didn’t know if she could really make it a regular thing.

“maybe i shouldn’t go back,” she whispered softly, tracing circles against his chest as she looked up at him. “what should i do?” she asked, feeling like all of her actions would lead to some very critical matters. however, before she had a chance to hear what he had to say, a loud cry sounded as she rushed away to find jaejin awake again. “oh, baby, why can’t you sleep for longer than a few minutes?” she sighed as she picked him up and walked back to where chansik was.

Chansik listened as he began to wonder over what they should do with their schedule. He didn’t want to bother other people to help watch over their child, so he opted to go with the only other choice possible. “I think we can have alternate days for our schedule. It’s better that way.” Chansik suggested, thinking that his plan would work out well. But then a few seconds passed before he realized the other possible scenarios that could occur. What if the two of them had an exam on the same day? The chances were slim since they were in two different majors, but Chansik knew there was a possibility of that happening.

Shaking his head, Chansik insisted, “No, I want you to go back to school.” He knew Sana’s desire to go back to school and he didn’t want to stop her from that. A part of him wished that he could take a break from school but he knew his mother would scold him for that and the last thing he wanted was more stress. He blinked his eyes as soon as he heard the cry. Instantly knowing that it was from Jaejin, Chansik was reminded once again that he was a father and he had his own set of obligations to follow. “Is he okay?” The man asked, for he was still unsure as to why his son was crying. Chansik stared at Jaejin for a brief moment before suggesting in a lighthearted manner, “Maybe he missed us that’s why he cried?”

[leaderjinyoung]

gongchan on game show yoo hee nak rak

[xidchanwoo-deactivated20180608]

° heart to heart

[acachansik-blog]

acasana:

sana didn’t know how to feel with his statement. why was he so frustrating sometimes? she would have thought that having a kid might have pushed him to grow up a little bit, but she supposed that their maturity levels were indeed still on very different points. “right,” she grumbled, thinking how he could have accidentally forgotten to tell her. it almost seemed like he intentionally forgot.

however, she didn’t want to fight. to fight was tiring, so she simply nodded as he continued on with his plan. she wrapped her arms around him and leaned her head into his chest. “can we really do this?” she asked, her heart pounding as she wondered if she would be okay with leaving their son at home while she was in school. “i’m scared. i’m scared he’ll hate me when i grow up for not spending more time with him.”

Without any hesitation, Chansik wrapped his arms around Sana. To him it felt like ages since he felt a sense of comfort and ease from someone but as he caressed her back, he listened to her words carefully. The question is something that he had pondered for the past few months. He asked his parents the same question and all he would get in return is silence. It was almost as if his parents were doubting his capabilities to be a parent. But then again, after what had happened with his dream he was beginning to do the same as well.

“I’m not sure. I wished I knew the answer to that question.” He confessed. Chansik realized that life was full of surprises and uncertainties. He sometimes wished that he could give Sana a certain answer — one that he instantly knew the answer to. But alas, he resorted to being his optimistic self. “Honestly though, I don’t think he’ll hate you. No matter how much time you spend with him, it’s always not enough.” Chansik explained before thinking for a moment about how his parents were the opposite. They barely spent any time with him that even until now, he could feel the distance between him and his parents. “But eventually there will come a point when he’ll understand…and possibly admire you too. I mean, this might be a motivation for him in the future when he wants to go to school or some sort.” He nodded before he lowered his head to kiss her forehead.

[xidchanwoo-deactivated20180608]

° heart to heart

[acachansik-blog]

acasana:

sana could hear the hesitation in his voice. her heart pounded in her chest as she looked at him before looking back down. maybe she shouldn’t have brought it up. maybe she should have just kept quiet and waited until their son was a few years older before thinking about this. but then, he was saying something completely different from what she thought he might. “really?” her eyes widened, almost as if at disbelief at his words. 

however, he didn’t stop there, and had she been drinking something, she would have spit it out all over him. “what?!” she couldn’t believe this. it wasn’t bad news, but how could he keep this from her? “why did you not tell me earlier? i’ve been stressing about what to do when you went back to school and your commute and all that.” she glared at him. “oppa, you now we have to get better at this communicating with each other thing now that we’re like … really together,” she pointed out to him, hands on her hips.

“Uh…” Chansik said out loud by impulse as he watched Sana’s reaction. Part of him expected this kind of reaction while the other had hoped that she would have been happier about the situation. “Well with my parents asking me if I was going to continue going to school and if I have applied to any part-time jobs, I forgot about it.” He knew that his excuse was terrible, but it was the truth. Chansik was well aware of the fact that he didn’t have the best memory out there. And the fact that he had forgotten to tell Sana one of the most important news was…well…embarrassing.

“But you don’t have to worry about commuting! We can schedule our classes so that I can pick you up during classes and we can go to school together.” Chansik suggested, although he didn’t think far in his plan. If both of them were attending classes, it would only be difficult for them to find someone to take care of their child. It was then he thought of an idea — one that he would have to adjust to eventually. “Maybe if one of us doesn’t have classes around that time, they can take care of the baby.” His idea sounded great in his head, but would it be stressful if they actually do it? Possibly. “We have a bit of time to think of this, Sana.” He told her with reassurance.

[xidchanwoo-deactivated20180608]

° heart to heart

[acachansik-blog]

acasana:

( may 2017 ) - @acachansik

after putting the baby down for his nap, sana finally felt like she had a moment to breathe. there was something weighing down on her for the last few weeks, ever since she had begun to entertain the idea. however, she had yet to run it by chansik, and she was a tad worried that he might not be so fond of the idea.

“oppa,” she noted, tone a bit solemn as she stood beside him. “i’ve been thinking…” she paused, a little bit worried about what he might say. but why was she worried? shouldn’t they be in a relationship where they should trust that the other would make the right decisions? “i’ve been thinking about going back to my classes. i mean, i need to try to figure out how, but …” she scratched her head. “i don’t want to be a college dropout and rely on my parents forever.

A sigh came out of his lips as Chansik wondered how he could solve his problems. With one problem on top of the other, Chansik felt overwhelmed and stressed. To him, there really wasn’t any place where he could be free and not have to think about his problems. Yet his eyes focused on Sana as he wondered what she was going to tell him. He had hopes that it would be something good, but when he heard the news he remained quiet. Leaning forward, he repeated, “You’ve  thinking on going back to school?” The news to him isn’t as shocking as the news he has heard within the past couple of months, but it caused him to contemplate over certain matters.

“Sana, I—” He stopped abruptly as he realized how unsure he was to tell her about his news. So instead, he focuses for a brief moment over how happy he is that she is willing to go back to school. “I mean, that’s great! If you really want to go back to school and take classes, then it’s fine by me.” While he seemed enthusiastic over the idea, internally he was conflicted with his feelings. He was happy for her yet at the same time, he wondered if it was possible for them to have a schedule so that at least one of them could take care of their baby. “And Sana, I’m not sure if I told you about this…” He trails off, although he’s certain he never told her the news. “But I’m transferring to Bidulgi, so we’ll be attending the same school.”

[acachansik-blog]

hihi! I'm kitty and I am the mun behind chansik, who is a 2nd year psych major. ;w; unfortunately I don't have any open plots page right now since I didn't have time to sit down and make one, sobs. but I do have a quick profile page for him! owo anyways, to make this easier for me please like this message if you want to plot with chansik!

[fatenumberfor]

gongchan in a lie live stages - for @evntea