PROMPTS FROM TASKMASTER SEASON 16
* assorted dialogue from the tv show, adjust as necessary
you look so nice, but underneath it all, you're just a shit.
it's just exciting to know people are talking about me.
i don't want to be in there with some wet guy.
oh, i'm gonna push this bitch.
are you a child of divorce?
to this day, i don't know what vibe i give off.
i know it's annoying, but it's all i've got so... just let me have it.
i'm actually quite good with a sword.
this is one of the most exhausting things i've ever done.
why didn't i just draw a cock and balls?
i don't know why i said that, 'cause i don't really regret it.
you're easy to look at than i am.
oh, you're here. what a thrill.
would it be mischievous to say things that i'm not supposed to say?
can i just say, i love weapons.
you made me say every country in europe.
if i do nothing else in this life, that was worth it.
what sort of cool things do you want?
i knew what had happened, and even i was swept along by the narrative.
it was avant-garde. it was french cinema.
good luck with your career.
it was very, very cold that day and i wanted to get it over with.
is that your starting position?
i knew it was something boring.
don't have to tell me twice.
it is the least sexy thing that anyone's ever said to anyone.
i don't like going upside down.
what have i done? oh dear. what have i done?
it's nice, it's harmless, it's warm.
this thing is disgusting.
that's useless. that's worse than useless.
i also agree with them. you are sick.
your pie technique was dreadful.
i really like it when you're disappointed in us.
oh, is there a fire? how awful.
nothing going through my head is family friendly. not one idea.
that was heterosexual male banter.
are you a superstitious person?
i can drive people crazy.
that is a true story, and i feel a bit sick.
i bought it to annoy my husband 'cause i thought he'd hate it.
i'm well-presented, very smart, and available for no-strings fun round the back of the barracks.
what's your favorite number?
running a business is bullshit.
when i think exercise, i think exorcism.
we're not allowed to work with nature?
we were at a wedding together once, and i made you eat a whole pat of butter.
obviously you want to put it on a penis.
is this something that would excite a heterosexual?
you're going to get a lot of letters.
i'm gonna go for plan b and just throw some things.
is this your stage persona, or is this what you're like?
i don't know what you mean.
you can hide in there waiting for your victims.
i'm sorry, i nearly killed you.
is it appropriate to call him "sir?"
i just really like the idea of stuffing a massive stick up a mannequin's arse and rotating it like a rotisserie chicken.
i was told by an ex that i have the hands of a midwife.
is that a compulsive disorder of some kind?
what an absolute shower of shits you are.