You're Not As Messed Up As You Think You Are

Iris | she/her | 17 | UU My life centers around doing too much and then not doing any of it while somehow managing to finish it all.

[aclusterfuckofotps]

It's after midnight Christmas morning and I just got in a fight with the only family member I didn't fight with yesterday. I don't have any friends that I normally reach out to when I'm upset except the one I'm sure is super stressed about college too right now and I don't want to add to anything for her and she lives to far away for just a hug to be possible. Every fucking teacher and administrator at my school expects great things and my only news from colleges so far is a deferral and I'm terrified that the applications I'm gonna be submitting in the next week have to be amazing or everyone will be disappointed in me. There's a girl at my school who apparently has a list of where everyone applied to, got in to, and got rejected from. I got to watch all my cousins make plans to hangout in front of me but I'm not invited because they think I'm too young and not fun enough. Doesn't matter that they were planning it with another kid who's only like seven months older than me and still years younger than them. I fucking miss not being the only one my age at family gatherings and the loneliness is made so much worse by the fact that five years ago I wasn't the only one and I miss him so much. My gift for my brother is lame and doesn't feel like a good gift. Both my siblings think I'm crazy and keep thinking I'm mad at them when I'm not and then yell at me for being mad at them before they let me talk. Three separate family members yelled at me in the last four hours about something they guessed I was gonna say next that was no where near what I was talking about. I don't have a youth group anymore and that was basically my entire life for three years. I feel horrible and I was so excited for Christmas and now I just feel like I'm going to waste it by feeling this way.

[aclusterfuckofotps]

I got a much lower score on my favorite AP class than I thought I was gonna get and I'm actually heartbroken because this makes that class worthless to most of the colleges I want to apply to and it was my favorite and I studied really hard for it and I thought I had done well and I wanted my score to reflect that but it doesn't. It also makes me really fucking upset because it was my only humanities AP and I want to go into the humanities, not STEM, but now I'm wondering if I'm gonna be any good for it at all or it I should just give up now before taking three humanities APs next year or bothering to major in it.

[soul-dwelling]

Ouran High School Host Club Episode 19: "Lobelia Girls' Academy Strikes Back!

[alicenthightower]

Rami Malek photographed by Ben Watts for GQ USA (July 2016)

Malek’s eyes do a lot of the work on Mr. Robot. I ask him if he’s aware of how crazy they can look. “I never think about it. I just try to experience things, and when I get riled up, I know they do involuntary things or get very menacing,” he says. “Even my mom says, ‘You don’t look like my son anymore!’ It’s like they say: The eyes are windows to the soul… I just said that in a GQ interview. Oh fuck.”

[alicenthightower]

#all these outfits make him look like a pokemon trainer

[wesandresons]

gtkmm: favourite animated movies [2/20] / zootopia (2016) it’s called a hustle, sweetheart.

[argumate]

Wingardium Leviosa Potter, you were named so that every time a teacher yells at you they’re going to make stuff fly around the room. Your mother wanted to call you Fred, but I thought this would be more true to his memory.

[fierceawakening]

okay this one is legit hilarious

[aclusterfuckofotps]

I just found out that like all my school friends are going to the birthday party of this girl I thought I was kinda close to, but she invited a ton of people apparently including some she's not that close to at all but I didn't get invited... Like its fine, invite whoever you want to your birthday I totally understand being selective about that, I'm not angry or anything, I'm just kinda sad because I thought we were closer than that...

[aclusterfuckofotps]

This never happens to me I never cry in school but I thought about Simon during philosophy and now I'm a mess and I can't go back to class

[hitouka]

“ H O W L ? ’’

[leofitzo]

get to know me: (10/10) male characters ► peter quill

Well, on my planet, we have a legend about people like you. It’s called Footloose. And in it, a great hero, named Kevin Bacon, teaches an entire city full of people with sticks up their butts that, dancing, well, is the greatest thing there is.

[madeupmonkeyshit]

if this nigga from a PG movie can understand it why cant yall

[actualdogvines]

[mycoins]

this looks like a dog wearing a dog costume

[frostyemma]

There was nothing I didn’t love about T'Challa in Civil War.

I love that he got the most complete character arc out of anyone in the film. His final confrontation with Zemo was intense, and the ending of it was even better.

I love that his vengeance was driven largely by his (actual, on-screen) love and affection for his father, who was shown to be a kind, compassionate, and loving man.

I love what an elegant, skilled fighter he was. His fight choreography was a joy to watch.

I love his costume. The costume designers really brought it to life and made it work.

I love that he was the only character who seemed capable of listening to reason and using new knowledge to change his actions. He didn’t just blindly go forward with his plans on principal once he realized the full truth.

I love the brief presence of the Dora Milaje. For those of you who are unaware, the Dora Milaje are his female bodyguards, selected from each tribe in Wakanda to represent the tribe’s most highly skilled and powerful women.

Y'all can have your Dr. Strange movie, but I’m here for the Black Panther movie.

[tropius2-deactivated20160313]

wheres the vine of the news reporter asking a dog a question and then putting the mic to his snout and then the dog makes sniffing noises

[funnyfecker]

[tropius2-deactivated20160313]

thank you

[slimegargoyle]

growing up finding girls attractive without registering it as attraction sucks because you basically end up weirdly fixated on them but also super insecure and competitive

[aclusterfuckofotps]

Honestly that anon made me want to cry. I thought I was still friends with them and I was just mentioning that they way things have been with them lately made me sad and now I get an anon telling me they aren't my friends anymore and ignoring the whole "family members are seriously worried about my health" part of it all.

[aclusterfuckofotps]

I'm going to block most people I know IRL on here now. This was supposed to be a quiet place for me to basically scream into the void but apparently it isn't anymore. Also apparently I'm "no longer friends with" some people I still considered to be my friends, just not as close to lately, and that hurt, so I'm gonna be shutting down for a while. From most things.