A Danmei Confession Blog

A blog to post share and discuss everything danmei

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

A danmei confession blog

Welcome to my danmei confession blog. The place to share and discuss anything danmei related. Feel free to look around, send a confession, feel the vibe and hang around. Or click more to see all of the house rules and a quick summary of the blog status.

Please keep in mind that I am doing this voluntary as a hobby.

House rules:

Danmei is for adults and older teenagers, expect to see topics for teens and adults on this blog.

Be nice and respectful to others on this blog. (No insults, slurs and accusations)

Call out post, rage-bait, insults towards people and confession mentioning users by name are not welcome and will be deleted.

The confessions made and posted on this blog are not the opinion of the moderator, I am only sharing the opinions I have gotten from everyone.

All confessions will be posted anonymously. Each confession will receive a number from me. Don’t add a number yourself.

When replying on a confession in the ask, start with the confessions number or a link to the post.

Please note the specific fandom on top of the confession. There is a lot of danmei out there and I don’t know everything.

When it is mentioned that it is about headcanons, fanfic, fanart and cosplay in the confession, confessions around that are welcome.

Questions for the moderator are welcome when they start with “question for mod” or “for mod”.

Complains, criticism, general negativity will be tagged with #negativity. Compliments and other positive things will be tagged with #positivity. More about tagging you can find here

Blog status summary:

Posting schedule: confessions get posted at 6:00 am and 06:00 pm GMT everyday till the queue is empty.

Post in queue: 16 (29/06/2026)

Ask inbox: 0 (29/06/2026)

Mod is: observing but busy. My response can be slower than normal.

FAQ

“How do I send in a confession?”

When you are on this blogs page, you see under the bio a button that’s says “what’s the tea”. If you press that button you can type your confession about anything danmei related as long as it follows the rules above’

“How do I send in replies to confessions/submissions/reply?”

You can always leave a comment under the post it self, you can also press the “what’s the tea” button on this blogs page and start a reply with either the submission/confession number or a link to the post.

“Why do you refer to the confessions/submissions as both?”

The danmei confession tag was already in use. And I did not want to clog that tag of an other blog with my post and this way I can keep better track of the confessions?submissions numbers.

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“I might be going insane but am i really insane for thinking that shen yuan and shen jiu are diff fragments of the same soul? inherently being the same person but also totally not? xiu ya, a spiritual sword responding to only one owner and one soul, yet responds to both shen jiu and shen yuan ! And they both have such similar characteristics its even a little scary really . Shen yuan and shen jiu both are personality base wise —> mean, sarcastic, sassy and pisses everyone off by being a big know it all and acting like they are the smartest in the room but they also endear themselves to a bunch of people by being cute in silly ways!! Sy def has shown sj characteristics . He is ruthless and has a very ahem viscious way of dealing with people who are against him or those he cares abt —> like saying lbg shouldve castrated sj even after reading how he ripped his limbs out and all .( pls dont hate on him guys if we were only shown a pervert lecher scim villain who beat the shit out of the protag without knowing readons and can only assume the worst cuz his character is made that way we would hate them too ) and we can rarely see sy characteristics in sj , but rmb that time he was caught reading a book upside down and then lashed out in embarrassment the way shen yuan def would could and HAS and have . Also they are both posessive iver things and ppl they consider theirs, tho sj would be more obv cuz he was a street rat and losing things precious to him is a very big and easy possibility to happen.

BUT! Do u see this !! Its very much like bingge and bingmei! They are inherently the same person but not at all the same person . Maybe thats why its so fun to make ffs where they actually interact cuz theres so many possibilities on how it could go …. Sj and sy same soul diff fragments propoganda starts now ok . Also the fact that the new extras gave a bunch of lore w bingzu and shattering of souls in parts creating bingge and bingmei just makes shen yuan and shen jiu being the same so incredibly possible . Maybe im not insane but just slow and everyone has established this except me , thinking im the thinker 💔 what do u guys think? “

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“Since there apparently alot of rarepair shippers here, can I get some fic suggestions for your favourite rare pair to convince me to ship it aswell?”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“writing danmei fics is sometimes so challenging 😭 I really wish there was a reliable resource I could look into for what day to day life is like in modern day china. I dont want to write it innacurately, but I also don't want to just shove the characters into a country that I am familiar either.

Of course there's really obvious stuff you can find out just by consuming Chinese media and some surface level research. Write didi's instead of lyfts, most everything is paid for using your phone (usually alipay), there are scooters, there are some parts of the country where you're not supposed to flush toilet paper, but there's just a ton of cultural nuance that I'm missing. What's it like walking through the streets? Are comfortable/uncomfortable are commutes to work? Do people normally commute long distances or live close to work? What are the apartments like? Is it more common to find studio apartments or two rooms? What sort of relationship are you liable to develop with your neighbors? Are there any expectations there? What are the schools like, what is the education like, what are the required courses that everyone would have high school proficiency in? What is the party scene like? What's the gay party scene like? Are people fake nice? Fake mean? Neutral? Genuine nice?????? Genuinely mean??????? Do people smoke indoors, what are the cultural norms with regards to smoking? Is it like Japan where no one gives a fuck or like Canada where people are considered they smoke anywhere near you??????????? What about politics? What are common political conversations and what sort of jokes are the youth making about it? What memes are popular over there? How is the netspeak different???

Theres just a lot of details that it's difficult to learn through research and im too poor to travel and it sucks, because I WANT to write about my blorbos in their home country. I just also want to portray their home country accurately “

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“being a shen jiu lover who hates qijiu is a special breed of torture

I dont hate yqy either. I actually rlly like them as a platonic pairing. If you tell me they're brothers, I'm all over that shit

But if you make them kiss, I am gagging

But qijiu is THE shen jiu ship and I am in agony

Sure, ships like scumcum and liujiu and others exist. But they're pretty rare and vaguely maligned by the fandom

When a ship is THE ship for a character, you're just fucked. You're reading a bingqiu or moshang or cumplane fic and just minding your own fucking business and BAM qijiu are in the background having some stupid romance and I am pulling out my hair because FOR FUCKS SAKE, I CANT EVEN READ OTHER SHIPS AND ESCAPE THIS SHIT

Even when I DO go to scumcum or liujiu spaces, there's a somewhat constant element of "yqy's one-sided love" or qijiu being exes or something else AND I JUST DONT WAN THEM TO HAVE EVER KISSED. NOT EVEN ONCE. NO ONESIDED LONGING, NO PINING, NO MESSY BREAKUPS, NO EXPERIMENTING WITH EACH OTHER, I JUST WANT THEM TO BE PLATONIC WITH EACH OTHER

Ffs the amount of joy and relief I would feel to find even ONE fic that has qijiu as being just good friends in the background. No will they won't they, just two humans who care about each other PLATONICALLY. There is NOTHING in the og text that states that they have romantic feelings for each other, no not even in subtext, so why the FUCK can I NEVER escape a world where they're in love?!?!

To be clear, I don't hate the shippers. You ship it, I don't, that's all. My issue is that I can't ESCAPE it. I can't go into a room and say "scumcum would be hot" without someone replying "Ohno yqy would be so sad" or "yqy harem dreams" or something else and like WHY WOULD HE BE UPSET IF THEYRE JUST FRIENDS, WHY CANT THEY BE JUST FRIENDS, WHY CANT YOU LET ME TALK ABOUT SCUMCUM FOR FIVE FUCKING SECONDS WITHOUT TRYING TO TURN THIS INTO QIJIU?!?!?

If I'm totally honest, I didn't hate qijiu this much in the beginning. I saw it and I was like "oh, not for me, I prefer them as friends" and TRIED to move on with my life

But unless I avoid basically all shen jiu content or any time he even features as a side character, i will continue to have qijiu shoved down my throat

So yeah. It's fucking hell being a shen jiu fan and hating qijiu.

If anyone has strong recommendations for fics that feature shen jiu and NOT qijiu, I would happily receive them. Im not picky about ships outside of qijiu, I'll literally read anything.”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“I wish 7seas invested in more translators / editors for the official English releases. “

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

reply to 113

One of the things I find wild about this is the implicit assumption that there aren't switch and reverse fans in China. Like... have you ever talked to a real person before? Because I've met several diaspora and mainland fans who like switch and reverse dynamics. Even those who break apart main ships. Almost as though they're humans and not a monolith.

It's bizarre to imply that everyone of a specific race and/or culture has the exact same preferences. There can be trends to preferences based on the culture, but to paint everyone with the same broad brush is just weird.

Also the idea that having a preference for top/bottom is uncommon in English speaking fandom is actually insane... literally join any discord server for a ship or any conversation and you'll find people with heavy preferences. Heck, look into other fandoms and you can literally find full blown honest-to-god ship wars based on top/bottom preferences. It's actually a lot more uncommon to find actual switch fans.

Person A: "I like switches!"

Person B: "Okay, reverse how you draw/write your otp"

Person A: ".......why no they can't what, noooo"

Yeah, there are switch fans. And reverse fans. But the VAST majority of fandom utilizes "canon dynamics" and "fanon dynamics". Literally open AO3 for any ship and I dare you to find a single dannei ship within which there are more reverse and switch fics than there are canon sexual dynamics fics. The comparison usually isn't even close. If there's 10,000 fics for canon dynamics, there's maybe 2,000 of switch dynamics. And that's on the optimistic side.

There is nothing morally superior about having a preference or not having a preference, but there are critiques to be made of both sides. I feel like you saw one person who pointed out some weird and problematic tropes that are common in heavy top/bottom preferences (and often borderline homophobic, if not overtly so). A few people agreed with the first person. And you decided this must mean you're somehow the minority opinion. You're not. Celebrate, you are in the majority. If you want characters to stay in their canon sexual positions in the vast majority of fandom, you have been successful 🎉. Just block the people who dare to have different preferences than you and continue to celebrate your ongoing and continuous victory.

Response to previous post 

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“Now I do love twinks.

But please stop turning CWN from 2ha into a twink all the time, when he is specifically supposed to be very masculine. And furthermore, stop claiming that him being muscular and masculine is not canon! I am literally constantly seeing people genuinely argue about it, because so many in the fandom are trying to push this narrative that he supposedly is a little twink for some reason.”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“Sometimes I feel like I am the only anglophone danmei fan for whom gong/shou dynamics are actually something I want and prefer and seek out. So many western fans seem invested in virtue-signalling how superior they are because they prefer switching (thereby completely misunderstanding that 攻x受 is complex and culturally determined and not anything you can reduce to position, domination, or gender traits).

It's fine not to like fixed roles, but then maybe danmei are not for you? Maybe, even, if you don't like scum gongs, toxic dynamics, red flags, pseudo-incest, or amoral characters, you should find a new genre instead of barging into this one and cherrypicking out the cultural aspects you find objectionable? But again, I'm pretty sure I'm alone in thinking this. The only time I feel less weird is on XHS.”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“MXTX changing the relationship of the Lan parents from being a forced marriage and Madam Lan being held captive in a "marriage or execution" situation, to her and husband apparently being a consensual and loving relationship despite her still being locked up and separated from her own children until her untimely death is fucked up. Just what messed up world view does she have where that dynamic is a healthy and loving one?

Furthermore it makes no sense any more why LWJ has such a trauma about it all and such a fear of ending up like his father with WWX”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

About 111

Aren't 7seas targeting mature readers? Almost all of their danmei are rated 17+/M. Just because a bunch of teenagers decide to read the novels, doesn't mean the novels are suddenly targeted at them. Or am I missing something here?

Response to previous post

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“I really wish 7S were targeting more mature audience than people reading light novels. Some danmei really need more mature readers and not because of explicit scenes. Also deserve more popularity but currently most of it goes mxtx and meatbun, because it is the most approachable.

My Stars of Chaos need justice. “

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

To that one anon in my ask box.

I have seen your message and deleted the thing you asked. It’s no problem at all.

❤️

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“The fact that mxtx actually tries to prohibit fans from splitting up the canon pairs or switching the top and bottom dynamic in fanworks is just embarrassing.

But it's even more embarrassing when you go these die-hard stans who are actually trying to play fandom police and stop other fans from doing that.

To both parties: Get a life.

It's as if Matel and some Barbie collectors are trying forbid kids from letting their mermaid princess Barbie kiss their Malibu Ken doll due to them not being from the same set.”

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

#109

I am pretty sure that most of us are here for the plot. Otherwise we would be reading oneshot single-volume yaoi smut.

Also most danmei doesn't even have smut in them, nor do many of them really concentrate on the main couple as a couple first and foremost.

Not saying anon can't enjoy the plot or isn't allowed to not care about the couples. But reading danmei for the plot is by far not unique at all. Also, I'm not sure if it was the intention, but the submission really sounds as if anon thinks that everyone else reading danmei are porn obsessed perverts who only care about reading smut and nothing else.

Response to previous post

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

Mini status update:

The queue has been refilled with all the messages in the ask box. The queue is now filled to the 7 July 6:00 am GMT.

I have discovered how to do the link thingy with text. So expect to see me using that a lot more.

That’s all for now.

Thank you everyone

[adanmeiconfessionblog]

IMAGE TEXT:

“I read danmei for the plots. I've basically hated every single main-pairing in every danmei novel I've read. I'm 100% here to read a cool action fantasy novel with fun characters and inventive plots. I do sometimes have ships, but it's never the main pairing and it's not often. I'm literally reading porn novels for the plot. I think that makes me a bit strange, but I'm having fun.”