I am here to help, the best I can

I am a Social Sciences M.A , BA in Sociology and Psychology. Throughout the years I have realised I have experiences to offer that can help people -many people come to me to ask advice on many issues, and I can usually help-I created this page so that I can reach out to more people as I think the world would be a better place if more people were content,fulfilled, confident and living life to the best of their abilities. I do not discriminate on age, background, gender,sexuality, location, appearance-I pass no judgement no matter what-you're as anonymous to me as you wish to be, and no problem is too large, nor too small, to me if it's a problem to you-then it's important and I will try to help you with it. Things I am experienced in; -Diet and exercise problems -Family problems -Sexual abuse -Intimate relationships -Emotional Abuse -Physical Abuse -Financial problems -Property problems -Work problems -Animals and pets -Depression -Anxiety -Suicidal feelings -Sexual health -Sexuality -Personality Disorders -Doctors and GP issues -Health problems. This list is not exhaustive nor is it in any order. Please note despite being wise, educated and experienced-I do not substitute medical advice for severe health problems nor can I promise that I will be the ultimate answer for you. What I DO claim, is that I will do my utmost to help you. I have suffered in life, I have experinced abuse and hardship, have seen some things I really cannot forget however, I maintain an outlook which makes me a happy, full of life and smiles person.Every day is a gift and I enjoy my life intensely. I want more of that in the world amongst others.

[advicehelpwisdom]

[advicehelpwisdom]

Being scared to find out what's wrong

Whether  mental or physical health problem,  a relationship problem, a financial problem or any other sort of problem, there are issues for many in NOT WANTING to locate the source of the problem. Not wanting to take the test or hear the results, not wanting to have 'that' talk, not wanting to call the bank and find out the true situation.

Getting over this fear is simple, but that doesn't mean It's easy. One thing I have found that always helps, is to remember that you're already living with this problem,whatever it is.And that is a MUCH HARDER thing to do than to find out exactly what's wrong, and then live with it. It's also a much more dangerous thing. A diagnosis will not make a health problem worse, it will make it better as you then will receive appropriate treatment. Or it will confirm that your fears are totally unfounded.

A call to the bank will not make your financial problems worse. It will uncover the true situation and better equip you to deal with it.'That' talk with your relative/partner/friend will source the outcome of what you already think is the situation, and give you the information you need to make yourself better and free from the burden of living without really knowing where you are. That hurts much more. Summoning the courage to find out where you're at in life, is difficult. And imperative if you are to stop the feeling of fear of day to day living with worry. 

Feel free to message me if you would like to speak about this issue

[advicehelpwisdom]

Good night folks

And remember, there's always help somewhere, no matter what.

[advicehelpwisdom]

If you think your problems are trivial

You're still allowed to ask my advice, without apologies and without feeling like you shouldn't!

I'm not just here for life's deep mysteries. I say this because I have had a lot of inbox messages recently from people who say 'Sorry I know this is nothing but....' If you want to say that, that's fine. But don't worry about this :)

[advicehelpwisdom]

Affirmation (Savage Garden).

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument  I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands  I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do  I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem  I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone  I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned  I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned  I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side  I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality  I believe that trust is more important than monogamy  I believe that your most attractive features are your heart and soul  I believe that family is worth more than money or gold  I believe the struggle for financial freedom isn't fair I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires  I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned  I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned  I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side  I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye  I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness  I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed  I believe that God does not endorse TV evangelists  I believe in love surviving death into eternity  I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned  I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned  I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side  I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

[advicehelpwisdom]

If you're feeling down

Think about , and reflect on, past successes. You will have plenty of them. Some you may have never thought about before, since they happened. Write them down, make up a song about them-think about them and remind yourself of all you've done and all you have already overcome.

[advicehelpwisdom]

This page

I've had a bit of questioning which is fine and I'll try to explain some things to reassure people. Yes, I do link to other pages if I find them useful. I live by influence as does everybody.

Also, If I ever quote somebody I will credit them, and if I ever use someone else's page to post on my page then It's for a good reason and I will never claim the page to be my own.

[advicehelpwisdom]

Carrying bitterness, anger or animosity burdens no one but you.

[advicehelpwisdom]

Jealousy in relationships=toxic

Remember, it's not good to make someone stay with you because they can't leave you.

You don't own anybody.

Repeat 'I don't want to make you stay with me, I want you to not want to leave'.

Be who you are-there will be somebody who does not want to leave you.

[advicehelpwisdom]

Remember nobody is better at being you, than you are. Embrace yourself every day!

[immarriedtoanentrepreneur]

WHEN HE THINKS ABOUT GETTING A REAL JOB

I’m like…

He’s all like…

[gotmycheck]

[advicehelpwisdom]

Look at this every day-feel the money running through your hands and feel GOOD about it!

[advicehelpwisdom]

How to save money every day.

This is a quick post, but a friend of mine wrote in recently asking me to help her save up for a house. I replied to her directly of course, but with her permission, I also put some of the ideas into this blog-they are not specific to anybody, I figured they may help others.

Turn saving money into a hobby, not a chore.

I really do believe that if you look after the small things, , the big things look after themselves 

When first saving money, make sure all you save goes into paying off any debts. Pay off the highest interest loans/cards first.You don't have money until you don't have debt.

Figure what you spend your money on-and cut it right down. It soon becomes easy and it can be quite fun.

If your largest expense is on rent, consider moving. If not an option, save on bills.

Insulate your bath with loft insulation.

Don't fill up your kettle.

Get energy saving lightbulbs.

Watch programmes films online and make the TV redundant.

Make sure your mobile phone is the most efficient contract for you.

Don't keep electric appliances on standby, TURN THEM OFF!

Only use your dishwasher/washing machine when full and try to cut down the frequency of using it. Wash your small items by hand on the stove (pant soup,anyone?) :)

Consider other fuel methods (an energy saver heater can cut bills down from using central heating).

Don't heat up the parts of the house you don't need.

Ask your landlord to insulate your loft or install double glazing. Sell some stuff you don't need.

Make food from scratch-turn this into a hobby.

Switch to non-brands. Find cheaper places to shop for everything. 

Make friends with a hairdresser if you spend money on that (delete trade/skill as appropriate)! Swap skills with friends to save money on things they can do and you can return the favour.

Reconsider travel methods. If you drive, find people you can give lifts to to help cover fuel costs. Walk instead of spending money on gas/parking/car upkeep.

Customise clothes instead of buying new. Every time you go to buy something, think 'Do I REALLY need this'?

If any specific questions message me!

[advicehelpwisdom]

5 pointers about stopping bad habits.

1)Remind yourself that it's just a habit. Nothing is in control of the habit,apart from you.

2)Remind yourself why you want to stop the habit-no matter what it is, if you're reading this, there's a reason.

3)The mind has power over the body. If you really want to stop doing something, you are more than capable of doing so.

4)Learn associations-and find substitutes. If you want to stop grinding your teeth, for example , note at what points of the day you do it. Or what other things are usually going on when you do it. If It's whilst you concentrate, keep some gum on you and pop some in. You'll soon associate concentration with gum instead of grinding your teeth.

5)Don't get angry with yourself .Anger is counter-productive  Think perspectives-having a bad habit does not make you a bad person.

Hope xxx

[advicehelpwisdom]

Steve Pavlina is amazing.