A Canadian Author of 10+ years, LeMercier specializes in queer erotica. Racy, raunchy and kinky stories explore the many flavours of fetish, fantasy encounters, and the joy of a good romp in the sack.
So I've seen a lot of weirdness in the HR fandom over the last few months, which I have tried to ignore, but one thing that always gets me is people who cannot fathom why someone would gravitate to Skip over Hollanov, and to Scott in particular. I get that everyone has their favs. However, I've also seen some people suggesting that Skip is "not really gay", or that it's aimed at straight men (??). So, as a gay Iraqi, who spent a solid 10 years in the closet out of genuine fear of persecution and homelessness, I thought I'd write a little about why Scott Hunter, specifically Francois Arnaud's interpretation of Scott Hunter, is so deeply meaningful to me and so many other gay men.
I am not going to deny it: Scott in the book is... nice enough, as Steve Rogers cutouts go, but a bit dull. Francois Arnaud's depiction of Scott in Heated Rivalry, however, is the single most accurate description, to me, of how it feels to be a more 'masculine' gay man in the closet. I am not an athlete (am chronically ill, in fact), nor am I an orphan, but even still, Scott Hunter is exactly who I have been.
One thing which I think is difficult to understand, unless you've been a closeted gay man, is just how toxic masculinity and homophobia intersect internally. It's not just about being afraid of your sexuality coming out: it's a fear of anything which could even tangentially seem gay. It's a constant internal struggle: you know you're not a real man (because you're gay, the worst thing you can be) but you also know that you want to be. You're not able to wear high heels and makeup and be friends with the girls, even if you want to (in my case, whilst I did want to and did eventually become friends with the girls, I never wanted to experiment with femininity in my personal appearance, though how much of that is socialised and how much of it I come by naturally, I don't know). Because those things look gay.
Every single thing you ever do - the way you look, talk, dress, the tv shows you watch, the music you listen to, the foods you eat - all get filtered under the "will this make me look gay" fear. You can't be friends with girls, because that's gay. You can't express your feelings to your male friends, because that's gay. Liking girls as people is queer and feminine, and liking them as sexual objects is not something you are capable of (despite what Hollywood will tell you, most gay men are not comfortable pretending to be straight, even the masculine-presenting ones). This doesn't start when you consciously realise you're gay, by the way: it starts years before you even know why you're doing it, when you're in that awkward stage of not quite knowing, but not quite not knowing either.
What this leads to is... crippling loneliness. You don't have friends, other than a few men you spend time with but cannot confide in. You learn to keep your mouth shut and go with the flow - someone is saying nice things about gay people in front of you? Silence. Because if you say something, that's suspicious. Someone is saying awful things about gay people in front of you? Also silence. Because you're afraid to say anything. But you can't admit that you're miserable, because that would mean making changes in your life that you genuinely are not capable of. I couldn't come out, and feel safe, because I would be homeless. So I had to learn to be okay with the misery. That it was normal, and I was happy.
Scott Hunter is, to me, the ultimate manifestation of that process. He's been in the closet so long that not only is he terrified of being perceived as gay, but terrified of being perceived at all. He wants to fade away. He listens to podcasts that neg the shit out of him, because he needs to know if they've spotted the gay thing yet (and also because Scott Hunter appears to be the most OCD and OCPD coded character of all time, but I will save that for another post). He clings to the first person he has a real interest in because he knows how few chances he'll get to do that in his life. He has a big, empty home that he's worked hard for, proof of his Masculine Credentials, but no one to share it with. He has friends, and he could confide in them, but he's so fucking scared, because if the wrong person somehow hears, it's all over.
He does this, incidentally, despite being a very clearly masculine man. He drinks whisky and plays hockey and furnishes his home in mahogany and chrome. He dresses well, but he'd never wear make-up. He also, it must be said, does this and manages to remain kind. Yeah, he's quiet, he thinks hard before he speaks, but he's managed to shed enough of his toxic masculinity to be kind to others, to speak of empathy and giving back, to be funny and self-abnegating and selfless... whilst maintaining all that inwardly-pointed self-hatred.
All of this comes through not just in Jacob Tierney's incredible writing, which transforms Scott from a caricature to a human, but also Francois Arnaud's unbelievable acting. The little hint of gay panic when Kip makes that hot lumberjacks comment, and we see Scott go through an entire odyssey before our eyes - shock, fear, confusion, anxiety, and then tentative, yet reckless hope. A "fuck it, might as well". The reaction to Carter's words in Sochi: trying not to appear too interested, because he doesn't want anyone to guess at what he is, and even his best friend being so accepting won't change anything. The sheer agony in his eyes as Kip leaves him, and he realises that he can't say a word to stop him, because Kip is right (and, you come to realise, he expected this all along). The outright panic attack in the art gallery date, Scott trying so hard to be inconspicuous that he becomes insanely obvious? It's obviously a little spoof of Captain America 2, but it's also... kind of telling that in Cap 2, Steve is hiding from the government, and in HR, Scott is hiding from the mere implication of homosexuality. And then going back to his apartment, dropping the walls, and even in the midst of his panic attack, still apologising to Kip, because he knows he was in the wrong? It's heartbreaking. It's devastating, in fact. And it's so fucking real.
I'm not going to read too much into Francois Arnaud's personal life, because I don't know him personally. However, I do know that he's an openly bisexual man who came out at 35. And I do know that the way he depicts Scott Hunter is the most accurate depiction of what it is to be closeted that I have ever seen.
(It also must be said that this is massively supported by the changes to Kip which occur between the book and the show, for which Jacob Tierney and Robert GK deserve equal credit. Book Kip is kind of a brat, who wants Scott to come out after a two month relationship, ruining his career in the process. Show Kip understands. He knows Scott's behaviour isn't his fault, and when he leaves, it's not a big fight: it's laced with empathy and understanding, because he has been there. They're not breaking up because either of them have done anything wrong. They're breaking up because the world won't let two men be queer, but it especially won't let masculine men be queer.)
And, to touch briefly on the fandom for a moment: this isn't a hypothetical. The fanbase of HR, a show featuring gay men in a relationship, is desperate to cast one as the "woman" in the relationship. Why else would Shane, a man of equal size of Ilya, played by a literal mixed martial artist in Hudson Williams, be so consistently reduced to a "twink" with "bottom eyes"? Why else would Francois Arnaud, the only openly queer actor in the show's main cast, be confronted with a hate campaign so severe that he had to move address? Why else would reports come out constantly of gay men being excluded from HR spaces by (mostly) straight, cis women, who seem to believe gay men are only acceptable when they come in perfect, non-confrontational, feminine packages? This is the fanbase for a show literally about gay men. Imagine, compared to this, how homophobic the rest of the world is?
So many people seem to not understand the purpose of Skip in the story. They think Jacob rammed it in because he desperately wanted to adapt Game Changer (ridiculous: if he wanted to adapt Game Changer, he could have. Reducing it to a single episode in HR basically destroys any chance at a real GC adaptation). The reality is, Scott and Kip are essential to Hollanov's story because they prove that even if Ilya and Shane did everything right, they would still be unable to be themselves. Scott is a beloved athlete, desperately trying at all times to be perfect, with a decade plus long career, dating a man who is masculine and muscular, who has nothing to do with hockey. He is doing everything right: he even has the classic hockey-player courtship period, of meeting and marrying within a few years. And yet, purely because of his sexuality, he is being crushed. Not because he's done anything wrong: he's a good person, as is Kip. He's done nothing to deserve being unable to love Kip in public. And nor has Kip. Both of them work to the bone in service of others, both are wonderful, kind, upstanding, generous people, and they're being destroyed because of homophobia. It highlights just how massive and pervasive homophobia is.
(Skip doesn't detract from Hollanov at all, FYI. The show is 6 episodes long because that's what Jacob Tierney chose, and having read Heated Rivalry, I do not see any scenes which were skipped (and I can see quite a few which were extended or created) in the show. Skip deliberately highlights the position that Ilya and Shane are in. Sure, Jacob could have just written the kiss, about Scott Hunter, a character we barely see. But if you don't understand just how difficult that was for him, just how broken and desperate he became in trying to become that Game Changer, how can you understand just why Ilya and Shane couldn't do that? If ep 3 weren't about Skip, I have no idea what that time would be filled with to tell that same story. But I digress.)
Watching Scott in HR, I see exactly what I could have become. Someone who is kind to others, who does everything to keep others happy, but who is broken and miserable because he cannot express who he is... and barely even knows it. Sure, he'll say he's fucked up, but he also can't understand just how miserable he is when Elena asks, because he's the happiest he's ever been! It just so happens that "the happiest he's ever been" is still not very happy, because he's been dealing with this shit his whole life.
Seeing his actual, genuine happiness in the speech in ep 6? Seeing him honestly encapsulating, in a single speech, the single worst part about being gay in this world: the loneliness? It's the most heartfelt and meaningful thing I've ever watched. Hollanov has a great many strengths, story wise, but whilst Jacob Tierney cut down and edited enough of Skip to make what I feel is a genuinely incredible depiction of what it is to be closeted, Hollanov is still predominately Rachel Reid's story (and I am far from a RR hater, but I do think she doesn't quite get the nuances of how it is to be closeted, which is, to me, the one weakness in Hollanov. I am a massive Hollanov fan, don't get me wrong! Jacob, Rachel, Hudson, and Connor combined to create something which deserves every accolade it receives. But every story has it's weaknesses, and for me, the depiction of the closet, re Hollanov, reads a little bit awkwardly. Hence why Skip is so important to the story: it smooths over a lot of those gaps, in a way that makes it feel like Ilya and Shane's experiences are unique to their own characters, rather than a fundamental misunderstanding of what it is to be a gay man by the author.)
So, to sum up: I have faced a lot of homophobia in my life, and Scott Hunter is probably the best depiction of it I have ever seen in any piece of media. Bar none. A lot of that, it must be said, is down to Francois Arnaud's being an unbelievably good actor, and I will fight anyone who says otherwise. A lot of it, too, is because I do have OCD, and Scott's constant engagement in harmful rituals to satisfy his internal obsessions definitely seems familiar. But mostly? It's because it's a story which you can only tell if you have lived it, which Jacob and Francois clearly have. And I love it so.
All of this is AMAZING and made me cry and is a spectacular example of why we need to uplift and support "own voices" in fandom and publishing spaces - both authors and readers.
As a queer female writing slash/MM, it's always been difficult for me not to feel knee-jerk offense whenever the accusation of 'women writers fetishizing gay men' comes up, because slash was such a crucial element in my religious deprogramming and queer self discovery. But I'm starting to find words for the nuance I've always wanted to argue for.
Sex and love are such an important, beautiful thing, and everyone should feel empowered to explore and tell the stories in their hearts, period. Stories are what make us human and connect us to each other, they're the most important thing in the world. Even if you're connecting over being horny for hot romance. ;)
But if you're writing, reading and interacting with experiences that are NOT your own, it's your crucial responsibility to listen to and understand those voices, especially for minority groups. Otherwise you're not connecting. You're only doing it in service of yourself, no matter whether you call that 'fetishizing' or not.
I haven't talked much about it, but jumping in to indie publishing has connected me to the kind of creative community I haven't really been part of since... maybe my weeby cosplay days? It's been incredibly creatively invigorating, and a wonderful opportunity to collaborate. But I was left regretting only writing Gay Romance when there's so many amazing women narrators...
Until @lauxandfound pointed out that I basically surround my boys with Hot Competent Women, and why couldn't we multicast?
Which is the story of how I'm now paying women to flirt for my pleasure :3
I hope you enjoy schmoopy new domesticity, hot kinky sex and Hot Bitches(TM) :D
@lauxandfound and I took a pretty big gamble with Audible's updated royalty program and putting this book on 'all you can listen', but I wanted to make this story (and Tyler's amazing hot performance) more available to more people <3
If you're an audible member, I'd love it if you could check it out!
And also the hilarious 'Rock Stars with Poodles" I wrote with my wife <3 @simonaniles! is only $0.99 ! Perfect for any spare bullshit Amazon Digital Credits you might have kicking around?
there's an old anne rice interview circulating on twitter rn that i remember reading ages ago where she makes a pretty salient point about how submissive men who have bdsm fantasies etc will go to a sex worker and basically order the ala carte version of their fantasy to be performed in real life but women don't really have that same option and certainly not at the same point of availability so they read her horny books instead. and honestly that argument has been in the back of my mind every time people get on their high horses about the popularity of booktok romantasy novels or heated rivalry or whatever the "women are horny and we're upset about that" cultural property du jour is ever since. women, especially straight women, have so few outlets for their sexual desires, especially if they have a partner who doesn't share them, and i will never understand why "someone ELSE'S private sexual fantasy makes me uncomfortable and therefore they should not be allowed to engage with it, even if i am in no way being affected by it or even aware of it at all" is such a popular party line among allegedly progressive young people.
they're always bringing experts or activists on the news to agitate about porn and there's a standard script for this that's like "I think sex education is important, I'm not anti-sex, but so much of this porn is violent and misogynistic if not outright illegal, and it's far too accessible to our children"
I want to see someone finally be brave enough to say that the government should just make its own porn for teenagers that accords with community values, so they don't have to go to these shady places to get it. I think the government porn would probably be pretty bad but I would be so eager to hear about the process of designing it. there would be so many stakeholders and consultations. in canada it would have to be bilingual
no-one would find it at all sexy at first but then in 20 years there'd be a thriving fetish scene where people develop elaborate codes and practices around culturally-embedded tropes from government porn
i need everyone to let me lay my head in their lap while they pet my hair and make soothing noises and tell me i'm doing such a good and brave job marketing this book. fuckin sisyphean indignity of hurling it at instagram over and over and getting basically no traction whwkwhfwlfwhjsklgfwhjkl
meanwhile my BELOVED FELLOW TUMBLRINI are being so INCREDIBLY kind and generous with the signal boosting and the general interest and encouragement, i am so grateful
#wait wait wait wait wait hold the fuck up#i was like ‘omg ariaste?? like ariaste from ao3?? like ariaste author of some of my favorite mdzs fics ever????’#‘they have a tumblr?! (how did this not occur to me before lol)’#and then ‘omg ariaste has a BOOK i must read it immediately’#then i go to their tumblr and am SLAPPED IN THE FACE by the fact that ariaste and alexandra rowland are the same person#like. ‘yield under great persuasian’ alexandra rowland.#you’re telling me tam beckett and attempting the impossible au!jiang cheng are written by the same person???? mind. blown.#*becket#this is like when i found out naomi novik was astolat all over again#sorry op you probably have this happen to you all the time it’s just my little mind is struggling to absorb this into rn lol (via @jcbmcdrmtt)
it has only happened to me a handful of times (i am not nearly as famous and cool as @astolat) but it IS delightful fun to harmlessly jumpscare people in this way, i must admit.
extra funny in this case because i believe my AO3 username was listed in the bio at the back of Yield Under Great Persuasion lmaooooo
anyway hi hello yes it is me. a gremlin making questionable choices about doing a kickstarter and now i have played myself with having to do all this promo
#to my deep shame for like 15 seconds I thought that the Fantasy Romans post was a colloquial misspelling of “Fantasy Romance”#And then I was like oh thank god like ROME ROMANS (via @peri-hellion)
No no wait this is hilarious this is so good, this is a brilliant joke and you should not be ashamed of it. "Local romantasy author Alexandra Rowland has written a new romantasy novel" and then the camera pans to me and i'm standing there vibrating with excitement, my hands full of Ancient Roman Trivia And All The Best Bits of HOT GOSS AND EVEN HOTTER TAKES From Classical Antiquity, and the interviewer is like "uhhhhhh i thought this was.... a romance???? novel???? romantasy? romance fantsy?" and i'm like "oh. no. no it's very much not a romance novel this is a ROMANS novel it's about the romans, Roman Fantasy, haha yes can i tell you about the romans???? nevermind i've actually already locked all the doors and windows ANYWAY SO THE FIRST THING YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND IS THAT THE ROMANS DIDN'T ACTUALLY HAVE A GENDER BINARY AND YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND DEEPLY AND *WITH SPECIFICITY* WHAT A 'VIR' IS--" and the interview is crying and shaking while i just hand them trivia tchotchke after trivia tchotchke and unload my pockets into their arms
oh my god okay so. For one thing. They straight up have words for intersex people. If a word exists, the concept exists. So already they're aware that sometimes bodies aren't easily categorized, so anyone who says "but the romans definitely did have a sex/gender binary" is just self-evidently wrong from the get-go.
They also straight up have words and social roles for people we'd now probably classify under the transfeminine umbrella, the galli. These were AMAB people who voluntarily underwent castration, dressed in women's clothes/jewelry/makeup, and were priests and worshippers of a particular religious cult to the goddess Cybele/Magna Mater, and Attis, her consort. (There is a character in the book who is a gallus! She is the emperor's augur, meaning she makes divinations based on observing the flight of birds. Important person to bring along on a quest.) Here is a statue of a gallus looking extremely cool:
But all of that is sort of.... normal to us? Like we get it, we understand that, we go "Oh, yeah, it's like this other idea we already know about," it fits into our mental model, it does not challenge us to bend our brains in any weird yoga poses.
"Vir" is the thing that will do that. "Vir" is often translated as just "man" but this is bad and lacks the weight of certain encoded subtleties. It is one of two words that means man, the other being "homo" (as in homo sapiens), but the vibes of that one are more generally just "a person (nonspecific)". "Vir", however, has extremely specific vibes, because it is not just "a man" as we would think of the concept today. A vir MUST MUST MUST MUST MUST possess ALL of the following traits to qualify as a vir:
adult
freeborn
male-bodied
CITIZEN!!!!!!!
with intact genitals
(behaves correctly as a vir)
If he's a teenage freeborn AMAB citizen, he's not a vir (yet). If he's an adult freeborn transmasculine citizen, he's not a vir. If he's a slave or a freedman or an immigrant (aka Not A Citizen), he's not a vir. If he used to be a vir and then got castrated (either by misadventure or as punishment for a crime), then oops he's not a vir anymore, he's a semivir (half-man). If he is a vir but he doesn't act reputably and adhere to the Required Gender Norms, then he's on THIN FUCKING ICE and should stop immediately and get his act together before his paterfamilias disowns him for Betraying The Vir Code.
From the word "vir" we get words like "virtue" (aka the qualities a vir should have), and "virile" (a vir's ability to be Fucking). This is also where we get words like "triumvirate" (a governing body comprised of three viri) -- which, when you realize what "vir" implies, REALLY showcases how unequivocally other genders were excluded from being full participants in government. Couldn't be elected to public office unless you were a vir!
The thing that makes this incredibly *GENDER* is that there were mandatory anxious toxic masculinity expectations forced on the viri that other AMAB people did not have to comply with. The Romans were out here conceptualizing gender as being something that was as much informed by your SOCIAL CLASS as it was by physical sex. So a male slave, freedman, or foreigner could (for example) refrain from shaving his armpits, and it doesn't really matter. Meanwhile, if you are a vir, you DO have to shave at least your armpits to be behaving Properly. JUST ARMPITS. If you shave your legs or your chest or your pubes, then [middle school voice] EW that's Gay. (The Romans' concept of vir-masculinity was very much a VERY FRAUGHT AND TENUOUS AND ANXIOUS attempt to find a Goldilocks zone in the midst of constantly shifting goalposts. If you're not manly enough, obviously that's gay and bad, we still have this concept today. BUT IF YOU ARE TOO MANLY THAT IS ALSO GAY AND BAD. Gladiators??? A super shredded mega-hot gladiator who's drowning in pussy? The viri are like, "Gay. Gay of him. Unmanly. Effeminate. Ew yuckie no no no." We do not have an upper limit on "how much masculinity is good" in our culture, we sort of think "the more the better" and that's why everyone's horny for a lumberjack.)
A lot of the time people are like "The Romans didn't have homophobia! They only had bottomphobia :D" but actually they DO have homophobia once you account for the fact that "vir" is a separate gender from "servus" (male slave), "libertus" (male freedman), or "peregrinus" (male foreigner/immigrant/other non-citizen), etc. A vir can fuck any of those genders, AND any of the AFAB-aligned genders, AND the galli, AND intersex people and that is perfectly fine and normal and Roman Heterosexual of him. Why is it fine? Because the default cultural assumption is that the vir will be topping. A vir absolutely must top, viri who do not top get mocked and made laughingstocks in satirical plays. This is catastrophic to them. They would genuinely prefer to die in battle, even though it's kind of gay to get stabbed when you think about it because that's basically another man penetrating you????? Cringe. Cringe and effeminate to be stabbed.
Actual Roman homosexuality would be a vir fucking another vir--someone of his own gender. This absolutely cannot happen, because then [GASP] ONE OF THEM WOULD HAVE TO NOT TOP. Morality crisis. Philosophers throughout the empire are clutching their pearls and scribbling the ancient equivalent of Reddit posts about how one time they heard about a guy (vir) who fucked his friend (another vir) and it's Probably Because Of Moral Bankruptcy Such As This That Society Is Collapsing Before Our Eyes, We Live In The End Times If Viri Think It's Okay To Kiss Each Other With Tongue, The Only Thing Morally Worse Than This Is How All the Twinks Are Becoming Gold-diggers (we can't get into the twink golddiggers panic of the 2nd century right now. it's about the viri buying twink boytoy sex slaves and then leaving them their entire vast fortunes in their wills when they died. Seneca the Younger had a Reddit tantrum about it)
basically the Romans did not INVENT toxic masculinity but they did perfect it and raise it to an art form. absolute slapstick comedy clown shit. Don't kiss your wife in public, that's gay. Don't fuck too much. Don't fuck too little. Don't fuck other men's wives. Don't chase pussy. Don't be too fashionable, don't be too unfashionable, don't belt your toga too tightly, don't scratch your nose in public, DEFINITELY do not be an actor, do not play music or dance in public. You can be an orator but that's still a bit sus tbh, because it's LIKE performing in public like an actor, and that's BASICALLY the same as prostituting yourself. Don't comb your hair too much. don't comb your hair too little. Don't be unkempt. Don't be too well-groomed.
[holds up the viri proudly like a naughty cat, stinky bastard man] they are making themselves miserable every day of their lives and that's one of my favorite things to watch a man do <3333 read my book. look at it on kickstarter
this is sincerely only scraping the surface of Roman gender nonsense and how absolutely fucked up these guys were. And i CANNOT get into stuff like how manumission (an enslaved person being voluntarily given freedom) was treated with rituals and attitudes that kinda make it feel like a gender transition process (you get new social roles, you get new expectations, you are washed clean of any "necessary shame" you might have had to endure, a sharp line is drawn between your old life and your new life). I also can't get into the Twink Genders right now or this will be impossibly long (twink is a roman gender, and there are multiple sub-genders under the twink gender umbrella ("puer" "exoletus" "pathicus/cinaedus" etc))
and you thought having a lot of genders was a new modern thing. no no. lol. lmao even. go read Roman Homosexuality: Ideologies of Masculinity in Classical Antiquity, it will give you SO many more cool facts about these fucked up lil guys if you don't want to wait for my book (though the author, a presumably cis man writing in i believe 1994 doesn't have the "ohhhh wait this is GENDER, this is ALL GENDER, this is just GENDERS ALL THE WAY DOWN" epiphany that i, a nonbinary person on tumblr in 2026, am predisposed to perceive)
people should also ask me about the Latin Fuck Verbs sometime.
You should absolutely go follow @ariaste's Daddy Hadrian x Tinou inspired Kickstarter and also enjoy all this great Gender talk. (The Twinks post is really excellent.)
My Ancient Roman Smut short story is (GASP) forbidden Vir on Vir and I wish I'd been ballsy/committed enough to go into that instead of just hint at it, but it's only a 30 min short story.
Anyway, while you're waiting for the "Wisdom of Emperors" Kickstarter to launch, go read free or listen to real hot professional queers narrate scandelous Vir x Vir sex. It's FREE. And I'm so tired of marketing pls just enjoy the smut. ;__;
VA Vic Fraser is officially funnier than I will every be.
Like, congratulations, Sir, you've you out-smutted me on my own smut AND outwitted me on my own post.
Legit though, @lauxandfound turned it OUT (as always, thank-you sir), and these two verbally banging goes beyond my fannish, smutty dreams. Ancient Roman AU accomplished. :D
Free if you want it (but you have to let me email you nonsense about my blorbos.)
The title is “Sing a Song That Only You Can Hear”. I did the story, the drawings and the colors. I did everything, but i don’t own the characters, they’re A.J.Raffles and Bunny Manders, from the short stories written by E.W.Hornung.
You can also download a copy for free, you find the link in the @raffleszine
Thanks to everyone for their patience! We are proud to announce that a PDF version of “Knocked For Six: A Raffles Zine” is now available via Gumroad.
“Knocked For Six” is a queer-friendly zine celebrating Raffles and Bunny’s relationship. The title of this project is an expression that means “taken by surprise”; we chose it because, along with having its origins in AJ’s amateur sport of cricket, we think it’s fitting for the relationship between the two amateur cracksmen who constantly surprise one another with their skill, cleverness, loyalty, and pluck.
download a digital copy
Contents & Contributors
Art by @apidologist
The Name of a Ship by @servicerevolver
Spooning Out Justice by @hellmandraws
Art by @graphiteeater
A Rose By Any Other Name by @parchmentscrawling
Sing a Song That Only You Can Hear by @meeerleee
Under the Bridge by @clearinghouse95
Art by @goddamnshinyrock
Censorship Killed the Burglary Star, or, The Rise and Fall of Pop Culture Raffles by @unrealthings
Art by @rockymountaingothic
In Which Bunny Rests by @riff-raffles
Sunt Nobis Mitia Poma by @6utton
The digital version is free to download. Regarding physical copies of the zine, we will be accepting and processing pre-order forms in the new year (January 2018). Please keep an eye on notices from this blog for further details.
I needed code names for two new characters for a d/s party, and in trying to sort through suggestions of "Gay British Rogues" remembered how much Raffles & Bunny reminded me of the inspirations for said characters.
Guess I'm reblogging this so I remember where it is when I sent out a newsletter about them or something?
This comic from the Zine is _especially_ Leander and Tristan coded. <3
I literally wrote this scene 14 years ago for NaNoWriMo as an AU Fanfic in a non-existent fandom. I spent SO LONG telling myself that the joy of writing was enough, I gave up on the idea of being "a creative" a long time ago. When I started self-publishing I expected nothing but maybe a little bit of ice cream money at a time when we were struggling.
I can't believe over 2000 people have paid real actual money to read this now ;____; But oh my God, guys, getting to witness it PERFORMED....
I just. I can't.
I know Tumblr probably won't care about this. I haven't had any presence in any sizable fandom since Pacific Rim (or riding my wife's coat tails in Black Sails). I lurk, I cheerlead, I've written a million tiny Yuletide fics, and I guarantee none of you read this when it was fic XD. This wasn't a "50-shades-lets-cash-in-on-fandom" thing. Just a gal paddling her tiny fandom canoe out into the ocean and hoping not to get eaten by an orca.
But guys. I'm in my 40s. I've _never_ felt so creatively fulfilled and I've never felt so connected through my creativity. And it's a shit ton of work, but chasing your dreams is fucking worth it.
even if your dream is getting to listen to your blorbos fuck
Been trying not to cross the streams between these two accounts hella obviously but I hate not being my authentic self. All of this started as fic in some way or other, characters I fell in love with, and transformed, and placed into a hundred different inspiring worlds in order to be able to live them falling in love again and again. I'm not ashamed of that beginning, because fandom is special. Fandom breeds an incredible kind of passion, and passion has always been how I've connected to people through my writing.
These audiobooks are so fucking special guys. I don't even feel like they're mine anymore. They've been transformed again with such passion creativity and I'm just overcome with how special it is to be part of that.
And at the risk of sounding completely unhinged. GUYS THEY'RE SO FUCKING HOT. AND HOT FUCKING.
(definitely too hot for Youtube, but here's a secret snippet. Wear headphones. XD )
I... have an audiobook O_O; Like, a Real Adult Published Author. On Audible and everything, released today. (See comments! )
And it's fucking hot XD
16 year old Mormon yaoi fangirl me would be having her mind blown SO HARD right now, _especially_ working with @lauxandfound.
35 year old "I'm never going to write more than the most obscure fanfic that only two people will read and I'm fine with that because publishing would never be worth it" me would... probably sheepishly raise a glass.
And the first ebook's been downloaded over 500 times, and people are reading the whole series and loving it and _getting_ what I wanted it to be.
It almost feels too surreal to accept? But I'll do my best to tuck aside the imposter syndrome for a little bit and enjoy what every artist hopes for. <3 <3 <3
So, I just dropped the first book of my series to 0.99 for the weekend as a celebration of the end of the series releasing next week. _Unfortunately_ Amazon won't include you in any of it's 'discovery algorithms' until you have at least 20 REVIEWS (not just sales or ratings) in THAT country specifically. (w.tf.) I have like, eleven. And if I can't show up, I can't make my Audiobook narrator any money ;_______;
If anyone has Kindle Unlimited or a spare 0.99 cents and is willing to leave a review on Amazon about how romantic and evocative this book is I would be forever grateful!! <3 <3 <3
Seeking His Command: An MM Romance of Second Chances (Intricate Ties Book 1) - Kindle edition by LeMercier, A.E.. Romance Kindle eBooks @ Am
This gets me exited to work on some upcoming bondage stories....Seeking His Command. Also this is fucking hot. I wish my husband would be into this. Maybe there's still time....
