Thinking about the historical usage of makeup, with Babyji giggling and being utterly delighted when Mama Lan dusts his cheeks with rouge - because what little boy who loves his mother doesn't want to copy everything she does?
LQR very gruffly scrubs his face off when he comes back from visiting her, which makes Babyji pout. Secretly, this is why LQR lets his nephew wear the rouge until after dinner, not that Babyji realises. He just wants him pretty colours! Uncle is mean! đ€
After Mama Lan passes away, there's no one to pinch Lan Wangji's cheeks and help him paint his lips, so he stops doing it. Although as a young man it wouldn't be strange per se for him to wear some sort of makeup, as his clan's rules denounce vanity, he rarely bothers to use anything beyond a moisturising lip balm (because flying on a sword is a breeding ground for chapped lips).
Anyway, he's pretty much decided to live his life that way when he meets Wei Ying. Wei Ying vexes him, and LWJ also kind of wants to kiss him(??!) so he does the only thing he can - he writes an anonymous (or not, considering his distinctive hand) letter to the clan's local agony aunt, his elder cousin.
This cousin, while at present a girl of nineteen, will one day bring LJY into the world. That is to say she's a very honest person, and also a woman of humour: to the young person lost in love, she suggests applying blush to appear softly coy to their ideal lover's eyes - and to also perhaps paint their lips a cherry shade, to entice kissing.
LWJ wasn't expecting such bold advice, but thinking of WY going off to kiss one of those Yunmeng girlsđ€Ź he's always talking about steels his determination. While he obviously isn't going to follow his cousin's advice to a tee - as he has no wish to explain to Uncle why his cheeks are suddenly the colour of ripe apples - he does invest in a bright rice powder, charcoal for the brows, and lightly tinted lip stain.
...LQR absolutely notices LWJ's lips turning the colour of plums overnight, but he isn't going to mention it if no one else does first. He knows his nephew hasn't gotten past his mother's death. He just doesn't quite understand why now of all times he's decided to pick up his old hobby.
...And then he sees that brat WWX mooning in LWJ's direction and understands far too much for his blood pressure!
----
WWX isn't sure what he did to piss LQR off, but suddenly he's being sentenced to copy the rules five thousand times! He doesn't even get to tease LZ that much, because another disciple's been put in charge of monitoring him - a boring one.
Luckily, LWJ still comes to the library everyday, sitting so quietly across the room under a ray of sunlight, his pretty eyes hidden under dark, equally pretty lashes. Really, LWJ seems to look more handsome every time he sees him! WWX wonders why that might be. đ€
Meanwhile, LWJ's been slowly getting better at applying his makeup, courtesy of a guidebook he found confiscated in one of the storage rooms - amongst other things.
One afternoon, he overhears WWX telling JWY that he thinks LWJ's cultivation must have advanced a lot, because he seems to be glowing lately. (JWY tells him to shut up, which LWJ doesn't appreciate. He wants to hear what WY thinks of him. He'll punish himself for eavesdropping later).
He's a little hurt to discover WWX likes his appearance so much, yet still hasn't kissed him like any number of maidens he's walked under a pear tree with. WWX may treat LWJ the same as he does those girls - flirt with him even! - but seems disinclined to follow through.
WWX in the background: LZ's wife will be the unluckiest woman alive! How's she meant to stand out next to Lan er gongzi's beauty? No woman could ever compare to him. đ„°
JC: Do you ever shut up?
NHS:
NHS: Let him speak. It's funny.
Suddenly annoyed - not on the verge of tears at all - LWJ decides to rush home to complete his punishment. He sulks the whole way through it. WWX thinks he's unmarriageable! đ
----
Eventually, during the fight against the waterborne abyss, LWJ gets splashed in the face, and it washes the makeup straight off of him. It is very embarrassing. He will never live this down. WWX is gaping at him like he's grown another head, and he just wants to walk into the lake and become one with the abyss.
They returned to the inn for the disciples to recover a half shi ago, and since then, the only sounds WWX has made are soft little sighs, as if LWJ has disappointed him somehow - as if he finds him unappealing.
Finally, the silence gets the better of LWJ.
LWJ: What? đĄ
WWX blinks, shaking his head a little as if he'd been in a daze. Then, he grins.
WWX: LZ, what was in that water? It made you even prettier! đ
LWJ: ...
WWX: đ LZ?
LWJ: ...
LWJ can't do it anymore. This is it. He's done.
Taking Bichen in hand, he knocks into Wwx's chest, slamming him against the wall hard enough to wind them both.
WWX: Wha-? đł
LWJ: Are you or are you not going to kiss me? đŸ
WWX's mouth drops open. LWJ's eyes hone in on it. Before the other boy has time to so much as draw breath, LWJ is upon him, pressing his lips, and tongue, and teeth against his own.
The kiss is messy - brutal - but after the initial shock of kissing a man, and kissing at all, WWX melts into it, moaning and grasping at LWJ's neck until he gains enough purchase to swing them around. Now, it's LWJ who's pinned to the wall, panting heavily, his ears flushed crimson. WWX reaches out to tweak one of them.
"Cute." His eyes pierce into LWJ's own, brimming with mischief. Trapped against him, Lan er gongzi looks like a surprised rabbit, his expression just barely edging into offence.
"LZ!" he whines. "That was my first kiss." He leans in close to LWJ, so their noses barely brush and their breath intermingles. One of the hands at the other boy's neck snakes to his waist. "You're going to have to make it up to me."
WWX has no idea yet how LWJ should pay him back, but he's quite adept at running his mouth senselessly. He'll just do that until he figures it out!
However, LWJ seems to have no patience to wait, and lashes out once again to take WY's lips with his own. WY releases a startled moan, and trips backwards over his own feet.
----
In the room next door, LXC smiles tightly, pretending he can't hear his little brother sharing affection with a guest disciple. He turns kind eyes to the official sitting across from him.
"This tea is delightful. Where did you procure it again?"
The man opens his mouth to respond, only to be interrupted by another - louder - salacious moan. In an instant, the corners of LXC's eyes crease from strain. He is not getting involved. Whether it's against the rules or not, there are some things a man can't unsee, such as whatever has his flesh and blood begging for more in the next room.
"Excuse me."
He walks outside to paste a silencing talisman on Wangji's door. Let it not be said LXC isn't a gracious brother.
----
LWJ and WWX do get punished in the end - very quietly, unlike them. Thankfully, most of the nearby inn rooms were left vacant, and so no one else heard how well they...got along before LXC intervened. He's sure their uncle would have a qi deviation if he heard WJ had lost face for the clan like that.
WWX whines at first that he can't stand being separated from LZ, despite the two of them copying lines beside one another at tables set an appropriate distance apart - under LXC's watchful eye, they stay that far apart.
----
Now that he has WY's attention, LWJ realises the makeup advice was unnecessary. He's fairly certain if WY only liked him enough to kiss him when he painted his face, he'd be very upset (and jealous). Thankfully, WWX seems more interested in the 'kissing LZ' part than the powder and balms.
He does occasionally still đžbeautifyđž himself, because it reminds him of the happy times spent with his mother (and because staining WY's neck with kiss marks brings him joy).
If LQR ever notices the suspiciously bright stains under that boy's collar, No He Did Not. He wishes to reach old age alive, thank you very much.
----
Wet LWJ: *exists*
WWX: Mine eyes hath been blessed. đ„ș
----
I also think it's pretty funny if the reason WWX finds MXY's makeup to be so hideous is because Back in His Day (20yrs ago, Yunmeng), a young man knew how to go easy on the damn blush.
