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Not today Justin
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Sweet Seals For You, Always
DEAR READER
YOU ARE THE REASON
Mike Driver
Love Begins
Janaina Medeiros
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Three Goblin Art
Jules of Nature
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trying on a metaphor
Monterey Bay Aquarium
noise dept.
$LAYYYTER
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Stranger Things
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@alchemusprime
3 Ways to Soothe Yourself Anytime, Anywhere in 5 Minutes
Do you want the ability to calm yourself in a less than 5 minutes? Right before a meeting, a presentation or a tricky conversation with a loved one, we can tense up. When we are grieving, we need ways to release emotions safely and keep functioning. With each day’s stress, we need quick ways to reset, restore, and soothe ourselves. Hold that thought. What about waking up to an intentional…
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3 Ways Affirmations Help Us Become Someone New
I teach affirmations all the time. I have overcome so much fear through affirmations, that I cannot help but teach it as one of the most powerful tools in my toolbox. Affirmations are simple statements in the present tense, that can, over time and through consistent repetition, change our lives. Affirmations are not magic words. They are repetition. They are re-parenting. They are a way of…
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3 Lessons My Boundaries Course Taught Me Before It Even Began
Recently, I had a deeply reflective experience while speaking with women who were interested in taking my boundaries course. Three women told me they could not join because they had no money. And here is the painful part: all three really needed the course. Two had given their money away to support young girls and single mothers. One was a young mother herself, in a toxic situation, trying to…
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3 Signs You’re Ready to Stop Surviving and Start Becoming Yourself
Over the years, I have noticed something very clear about the people who are drawn to my coaching practice. They are usually not looking for surface-level motivation. They are not looking for someone to simply tell them to “think positive,” make a vision board, or push through. They are looking for something deeper. They are trying to understand themselves. They are trying to heal. They are…
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5 Reflections on Softness, Service, and Strength
This has been a big, beautiful, full-circle kind of week. I celebrated my birthday on the heels of Alchemus Prime turning 11. Eleven years of service, learning, rebuilding, refining, and continuing to say yes to the work I feel called to do. When I look back, I don’t just see a company. I see a path of integrity. I see courage. I see all the moments when I kept going, even when the next step was…
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Beyond Medicine: 3 Ways to Heal, Thrive, and Lead
What if your health isn’t just about symptoms—but about the patterns you live, the stories you carry, and the systems you move within? Our Beyond Medicine video series on social media has been a set of awareness-raising conversations about wellness, trauma and social issues. You may have noticed that we paused the series for the last few months. We’ve been quietly compiling a book series that…
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13 Reasons I Went from Swimming 0 to 26 laps in 12 Months: From Phobic to Addict
My swimming journey began innocuously at age ten, then resulted in fear that kept me paralyzed for 38 years. A year later, I am addicted to swimming, and cannot wait to get to the pool. What made the difference? First , it was necessity. Injuries made it clear I had to swim to stay fit. I could not carry on with Zumba and other exercises that had impact on my knees. Thanks, netball, running,…
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4 Ways Trauma Feels Like Your Personality
One of the hardest things about trauma is that it can feel like personality. Not because it is — but because you have lived with it for so long. Trauma often does not just live in memories. It lives in patterns. Patterns in how you react.Patterns in how you cope.Patterns in how you think.Patterns in who you become when you feel unsafe. And if we are not careful, we can spend years calling…
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3 Ways the Pacific is Addressing SOGIESC
As a coach who works with members of marginalized LGBTQIA+ communities, I am always on the lookout for new and integrated approaches to inclusion. I recently attended a webinar in which a new Pacific Women Lead guidance note, Many Petals, One Whole Bloom: Strengthening SOGIESC Inclusion in the Pacific, was discussed. SOGIESC stands for Sexual Orientation, Gender Identity and Expression, and Sex…
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Why Toxic Workplaces Are a Development Issue in the Pacific
As a life and leadership coach, I’ve been exploring a theme that continues to surface across coaching sessions, research, and conversations with leaders: trauma doesn’t stay at home—it shows up at work. In my earlier article, The Elephant in the Room: Trauma in the Pacific, I explored how trauma sits at the root of many of the region’s most pressing challenges—violence, inequality, and fractured…
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5 Ways Traumatized People can Harm You
I’ve been reflecting a lot on how people create harm, often subconsciously, because they refuse to work on their trauma. Or perhaps because they cannot work on it. Many scenarios exist, but some common themes emerge. Here, I discuss five of them. Arrogance – often, people have ego-based fears and insecurities as well as low self-esteem as a result of childhood trauma. The ego masks these with…
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5 Ways to Catch a Manipulator in the Act
Recently, I’ve had some interesting experiences that forced me to observe carefully. I wanted to see if I was being manipulated. What I found helpful was to refrain from judging (this can be so difficult), but to let the data show me what was really happening. My intuition and experience also helped, but I made decisions based on evidence. Here are five ways to see if someone is manipulating…
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3 Ways to Know if you're Being Groomed for Emotional Abuse
Recently, I met a person who instantly felt like someone I had known before. I felt a sense of recognition and connection. It was a magical feeling. Of course, when this happens, the mind begins to concoct scenarios of possible futures – will this person be a friend, or a romance, or something else? Trauma responses also start to flood in – will this person be trustworthy? Will they…
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Becoming a Swimmer: On the Other Side of a Phobia
Yesterday I went for a swim after a day off. I felt strong, using my paddles to build upper body strength. I tend to start my swimming sessions with drills – working my upper body and lower body. Then, I finish with side breathing. Since my first post about swimming, I’ve been steadily improving my techniques. With breathing, this has meant less fear, which means less gasping and more easeful…
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6 Ways to Cope with Negative People
In the previous post, we looked at how negative people can cope with their own negativity. In the last episode of the Niggling Negativity series in our Beyond Medicine show on Facebook we looked at how friends, relatives and loved ones can cope with a negative person. This blog gives a summary of the tips shared in that episode. It is usually emotionally draining to regularly be with a negative…
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4 Healthy Ways of Coping with Negativity
As a follow-up on our previous posts on traits of negative people, and factors surrounding negativity, we look at ways in which persons can address their own negativity in this post. Sometimes, people do not realize how negative they are until someone points it out to them. A good friend or a family member may do that despite the risk of backlash. Once negative people realize or are made aware…
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4 Steps to Healing your Triggers
Over the last several months, I’ve been working with my therapist on how to manage my emotional triggers. What I learned has changed me – it has made me less reactive and more free. I wrote a book about it, because I realized how important this inner work is for all of us. In this post, I want to share four ways our new book, called Triggers: From Painful Patterns to Personal Power, supports…
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