Stu the Implaer

Demolish the world of CS

[alexdaro]

What advice would you give your 18 Year old self?

Don’t chase the girls. Get better at making decisions.

When I was 18 all I wanted to do was have sex. Every second of everyday was, and at times still is, a testosterone induced panacea. I became so indulgent. The physical act lost it’s luster and I found myself competing with other males. I even knew some young men that held lists of partners.

Now, I have to disclaim that, in my opinion this is natural. Good looking 18 YO males are inundated with a borage of women. It’s hard to combat this and you begin to have a hard time saying no. It’s similar to a drug. Orgasm releases some of the same chemicals in the brain as say, cocaine or heroin. It’s powerful. So with that said, it’s common for males and females to be sexually engaged.

The problem starts to rear it’s ugly head when priorities are realigned. For example here’s a list of things that should have taken a higher priority than chasing skirts:

Health

School

Ego

I’ll start with my health. Health is so important in every stage of your life. Everyday when I drive into work I see an elderly man swaying back and forth as he rides his bike up a moderately steep hill. He tries so hard that on one occasion he swayed so much that he almost was struck by a car. I assume he lives around the area and I bet he wakes up everyday with one goal in mind. Ride his bike and get to the top of the hill. I never get to see him reach the top of the hill, but I bet when he does, he has a hell of a time riding back down. I love this story because it reminds me to focus on my health, at any age.

It’s not only exercise but diet as well! It’s so cliche that I hate this phrase, but if you really sit down and think, it’s hard not to agree. You are what you eat. If you eat nothing but cold cut sandwiches, you’re gut will start to resemble the marbling you find in a really good piece of pastrami.

At age 18 I stopped exercising. Before that I played multiple sports. There usually wasn’t a day that went by with out some sort of physical exertion and I was happy that way. There came a day when the last whistle blew on my high school football career. I remember that day vividly. At the time I was happy I didn’t have to show up for practice, and in hindsight, a switch was flipped in my brain. I no longer had to suffer the pain of exercise. What I didn’t realize was that I there would be much more pain (in the form of self loathing) over the next couple of years.

Second, school.

I somehow lucked out and grew up in a family that never put an emphasis on school, but rather on technology. My dad was a luddite with computers, but luckily I have an older brother who lived and breathed computers, video games and whiskey. A solid combination to help raise a younger brother (me) that would later go on to become a software engineer.

I hated school. I never fit in while in the classroom. I usually found a seat near the back of the room. It made it easier to draw. The idea of learning topics such as world history and oceanography drove me insane. Some of my friends went off to Stanford, UCLA and Yale, meanwhile I stayed at home with my dad and tried to put up with two more years of junior college before I called it quits.

It wasn’t that I didn’t like to learn. I actually love it. It was the format in which I was expected to learn ended up being the problem. Some folks THINK they are really inept in a formal educational setting. What I realized later was that it wasn’t that I couldn’t learn, it was simply my motivation to learn. I wish I could tell my 18 YO self to stop seeing the classroom as a popularity contest and start seeing the value of education. I would have shown myself where I would be in just ONE YEAR, a very dark, morbid place. The girls would soon disappear, just like my muscles from playing high school football, and soon you will be alone and empty with no real direction in life.

Lastly, Ego.

As I turned 19, things were rough. I started to lose contact with friends that were going off to college. I started to lose a lot of muscle mass. I started to even lose the ONE thing that I was so confident in, chasing girls. When your 18–19 YO, life hits you like a ton of bricks. You realize you just spent four years of your life not really giving school the proper attention that it deserves. You start to realize that your friends are much more socially and technically adapted to success, while others are not. You start to realize that being a good looking teenager slowly hold less and less value. You start to come out of the haze that was your teenage years.

The biggest blow during this time was to my ego. I thought I had so much power as a brash, punk. Boy was I wrong. I went through I short depression that forced me to understand the main principles in life that I was ignoring. Relationships, a daily practice of some kind, and most importantly, direction. I needed to head in a direction that would grant me piece of mind. I remember waking up, walking down my dad’s driveway and either going left, or right. No particular direction whatsoever.

The next year (20 YO) I had an epiphany while on Psilocybin. I packed my bags and moved to Los Angeles. My life was changed for the better.

Moral of the story. If I were to give my 18 YO self a little piece of advice I would say: “Get good at making large, actionable decisions. And stop chasing girls.”

[alexdaro]

Self validation - Knock it off!

Have you ever had dinner with someone who constantly drones on about themselves? The answer for most people is a thunderous "YES". Have you ever bore witness to a man or woman persistently talk about their new, for example, Sub Mariner Rolex Watch or Louis Vuitton purse? Again, for some people in the first world, a deafening "YES" from the audience. Have you ever asked yourself "this bitch only makes $45,000 a year yet, she's leasing a new BMW? How much credit card debt is he or she in? Is her husband or wife loaded? Who's bringing home the bacon here? Perhaps they have a side business that I'm not considering? What can we unearth about this person's finances that allows them to live this luxurious lifestyle?". Have you ever had a religious fellow bestow platitudes on you such as, " you NEED to stop doing the devils work and come towards the light?" -- hopefully not and if you have, next time that happens quickly throw a ninja-like, impact smoke bomb and vanish into the shadows before they have you singing religious rock tunes at the "Thursday Night Youth Group". Trust me, it can happen. No fun. But I digress...... Have you ever been on the other side of the dinner table wondering when is this person going to ask YOU about YOUR recent sport, hobby or job? "When are they going to STOP talking about themselves and turn the conversation onto more important subjects.... Like ME!".

 I'll give you a piece of advice, once you start down this rabbit hole, viciously rip yourself out of that thought process. As counterintuitive as this sounds, while the second party is indeed self validating by what we call "showing off" their material ownership, you, yourself are also internally, subconsciously self validating your own finances and lifestyle choices. Before you know it, your monkey brain will act on impulse and begin the "one up" battle of self righteousness. 

Self validation can be deadly.

For example, cocaine addicts need to convince themselves that a very deadly lifestyle is something that "helps" or "works for" them.

"At a certain point, cocaine usage ceases to be a voluntary action: this is the onset of addiction. The positive reinforcement of the sensation of euphoria eventually alters the brain so that the use of cocaine is obligatory."  -- http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/exchange/node/1704

You can start to see why cocaine and self validation go hand in hand. As the person becomes an addict, the constant need for a euphoric state of mind is obligatory. Whether that be gambling away their mortgage payment, or impulsively buying that new purse that they can't afford. It all comes down to releasing that hit of dopamine in the brain.  

So the moral of the story kids, is. Stop. Stop trying to one up each other at the dinner party, stop with the rivalries on the playing field and at work. Drop the egomaniacal, myopic thoughts and for pete's sake stop with the self validation. 

[alexdaro]

Self validation - Knock it off!

Have you ever had dinner with someone who constantly drones on about themselves? The answer for most people is a thunderous "YES". Have you ever bore witness to a man or woman persistently talk about their new, for example, Sub Mariner Rolex Watch or Louis Vuitton purse? Again, for some people in the first world, a deafening "YES" from the audience. Have you ever asked yourself "this bitch only makes $45,000 a year yet, she's leasing a new BMW? How much credit card debt is he or she in? Is her husband or wife loaded? Who's bringing home the bacon here? Perhaps they have a side business that I'm not considering? What can we unearth about this person's finances that allows them to live this luxurious lifestyle?". Have you ever had a religious fellow bestow platitudes on you such as, " you NEED to stop doing the devils work and come towards the light?" -- hopefully not and if you have, next time that happens quickly throw a ninja-like, impact smoke bomb and vanish into the shadows before they have you singing religious rock tunes at the "Thursday Night Youth Group". Trust me, it can happen. No fun. But I digress...... Have you ever been on the other side of the dinner table wondering when is this person going to ask YOU about YOUR recent sport, hobby or job? "When are they going to STOP talking about themselves and turn the conversation onto more important subjects.... Like ME!".

 I'll give you a piece of advice, once you start down this rabbit hole, viciously rip yourself out of that thought process. As counterintuitive as this sounds, while the second party is indeed self validating by what we call "showing off" their material ownership, you, yourself are also internally, subconsciously self validating your own finances and lifestyle choices. Before you know it, your monkey brain will act on impulse and begin the "one up" battle of self righteousness. 

Self validation can be deadly.

For example, cocaine addicts need to convince themselves that a very deadly lifestyle is something that "helps" or "works for" them.

"At a certain point, cocaine usage ceases to be a voluntary action: this is the onset of addiction. The positive reinforcement of the sensation of euphoria eventually alters the brain so that the use of cocaine is obligatory."  -- http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/exchange/node/1704

You can start to see why cocaine and self validation go hand in hand. As the person becomes an addict, the constant need for a euphoric state of mind is obligatory. Whether that be gambling away their mortgage payment, or impulsively buying that new purse that they can't afford. It all comes down to releasing that hit of dopamine in the brain.  

So the moral of the story kids, is. Stop. Stop trying to one up each other at the dinner party, stop with the rivalries on the playing field and at work. Drop the egomaniacal, myopic thoughts and for pete's sake stop with the self validation. 

[alexdaro]

When's the last time you smelled a rose?

I was at a bar today for the first time in probably close to six months. It was a super hip craft beer bar that also broadcasts all of the NHL Hockey games. Located in Santa Monica founded by a nice gentleman from the east coast, NYC if I remember correctly. You know this place is east coast legit when you use the loo. There's a picture of Peter Luger's Menu above the men's urinal. Quite nostalgic if you have ever dined at PL's. 

After a few Petrus sours, my typical recluse self, nestled in a corner part of the bar consciously and constantly reminding myself to close my tab - worried up some thoughts and jotted them down. An inner dialog which differentiates between what is "expected" and what is "exhilarating" - very much stressed and alcohol induced :)

Why can't we paint with our own brush? Sometimes we feel obliged, coerced into what is laid out before us even if it doesn't fit with what we feel is the "right"  way at ANY given time! I am a recluse, I despise the formal, I despise the norm - yet I live in it.

Do rid the tension of everyday monotony with our vices? With our causes? With our constant engagement in life? Let me ask you a question...... 

When's the last time you smelled a rose? 

Whenever you feel this way there are two things to ask yourself. Does it make you happy or does it make you money. Act accordingly. 

[alexdaro]

Andrew Kramer and Video Copilot

 This is an excellent Keynote from someone who spends most of his time behind the computer making awesome art! Andrew Kramer gives a witty yet touching talk on how to become a better artist. 

From Video Copilot's contact page:

"Video Copilot is a collaborative resource for training, design tools and artists. Our goal is to show you what is possible and how effects can be created so that you can apply these techniques on your own creative adventures. We strive to develop distinctive and innovative tools that improve the quality and speed of your production while offering freedom and flexibility."

I owe my entire career to Andrew Kramer. I stumbled on videocopilot.net around 2007 and later found myself with a career in Digital Media. I remember one day opening up After Effects on my older Brother's hand-me down computer. Not too much longer I came across Videocopilot. The amount of knowledge I was able to pickup from Andrew in one short year was the knowledge that propelled me into a career path I never thought I could achieve. From After Effects to Nuke I landed a job as a Render Wrangler at Digital Domain in Venice, CA.

Andrew taught me the baseline skills needed to work in Digital Media. What resolution and pixels are, what an alpha channel is, what a mask is. These foundational skills allowed me to think in abstract ways! I went from an original career path directed towards becoming a Compositor at Digital Domain to falling in love with writing code in languages like Python and Javascript! Artist turned Programmer. There really is something to applaud here and that is the dedication and commitment Andrew and the Videocopilot team have put into making the world of Digital Media a better place. They've carved out a little piece of the internet focused on educating the next Global (not just Hollywood) Production Artists. There are few resources in this world that have the quality and quantity such as videocopilot. I hope they continue to put out content! 

[alexdaro]

Chase greatness or grind-on safely with the common folk?

Consider oneself skilled, courageous and authentic. Is it easier to make money as an entrepreneur or grinding the corporate latter? One might have lot's of translatable skills which could allow he or she to automate systems and showcase their various proficiencies as a business owner. But is it worth the risk? As an entrepreneur you will definitely have to work an insane amount of hours. So it's going to be a busy, booked calendar regardless of ones choice. Alternatively, therein lies the idea of "passive income". Having multiple streams of revenue from multiple products, services and advertising through content. And..... "With great power comes great responsibility" - I'm pretty sure a President and/or Spider-Man quoted that. Anyways, your future quickly winds up in your hands, similar to the day you turned 18 and quickly had to get your shit together.  As an employee one will definitely put in long hours, but this sacrifice comes with the safety and security of a corporate job. Healthcare, investment options such as 401k and stocks, along with paid vacation and sick leave. Additionally, often times larger the company, slower the pacing which reflects in the daily tasks of a common employee, a common cog in the ever turning wheel. So which is it? Does one take the leap and chase greatness or do we grind on safely with the common folk?

To answer this question, you have to calibrate your intention. Stop thinking of goals and start thinking of intentions. Ask you self some very deep questions while sitting in silence. "Do I have it in me to cope with high stress high demand life of a corporate job, artist, entrepreneur, etc... Do I have an established, tested business model? Can I moonlight while I gain traction with my side business?". Don't try to intellectually think your way to a solution. Just sit with the feeling, physically and emotionally. It's an odd practice at first as your brain will recursively think of a way to solve the problem. But if we can sit in silence and condition ourselves to the sensations of the problem both psychologically and biologically, we can then start to build the mindset needed for the rollercoaster ride of being self employed.

[alexdaro]

Perception, Action, and the Will.

Ryan Holiday's modern take on Stoicism with his book The Obstacle Is The Way digestibly lays out practical stoic principals that apply in today's society. Highly recommended! He speaks of three principals: Perception, action and will. If we inject these three principals into our everyday lives with a conscious effort, we can expect a calmer, yet more authoritative approach toward life. Below is a mental dump of what I took from The Obstacle Is The Way along with the mindsets that I try to cultivate and administer into my daily life. I wrote these out while abroad in Jakarta, Indonesia. Nestled in the corner of a loud, bustling Starbucks, I sipped my Sumatran Java and laid out some stoic principals to live my life by. Using the three pillars - perception, action and will, here is what I established:

Our Perception:

Gratefulness- we have to understand that all of this could collapse at any second. Believe this truly and be wise to its power. Remember moments when the world was dim and suddenly opened up. In these moments we must return in order to grasp it's concepts. Remember to treat everyday like this. Fake it if you have to.

Opportunity - become the optimist. Look for the good in any situation. There is always something to gain in every opportunity. If there is nothing to gain, then simply the practice of unconditional generosity can be the practice.

Generosity - being generous with our disposition and perception. If there is nothing to gain then use the unconditional generosity procedure. Simply be generous.

 Our Action:

Enthusiasm - prime yourself before any interaction with good intention. Only understand that the successes and failures lie within your attitude.

Outcome- always look for the outcome before you act. Understand that there is something to gain with every action. Treat it as a transaction but understand that not every action will produce an outcome you completely profit from. Sometimes the act itself is the outcome. Remember, the only reality you can be sure about is your own perceptions. So try to understand other's intentions. It will benefit you.

 Our Will:

Understanding - understand your willingness to do something, whether it be outcome based or unconditional practice, understand the benefits to yourself and others around you.

Pleasure - for simple pleasure or inversely, the avoidance of pain.

Obligation - "To do laundry when you don't want to so you don't have to free ball it" - Ruth Jahja-Daro..... Essentially, to understand the duties of yourself and those around you and to fulfill those duties to the best of your ability without hesitation.

Fear - of disappointing  yourself or others. Always remind yourself of when days were dim. Understand that this could all come crumbling down around you. Understand your fear, respect it but don't control you of course!

[alexdaro]

Outsourced Curiosity

The most import attribute of being successful has got to be curiosity, more importantly, meandering curiosity. A curious mind is an adventurous mind. With the age of the internet, curiosity is just a click away! With each link-click brings a new resource, a new adventure. But with social media, our curiosity could be being outsourced. Our curiosity is ceasing to zigzag, disallowing us to stumble…

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[alexdaro]

Lazy loading—offload worry until it’s absolutely necessary.

"I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened." ― Mark Twain

“Lazy loading is a design pattern commonly used in computer programming to defer initialization of an object until the point at which it is needed. It can contribute to efficiency in the program’s operation if properly and appropriately used.”

Can we use a software design pattern in our daily lives to help us become more emotionally efficient? It’s a technique I have been practicing over the past…

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[alexdaro]

Capital Expenditures - use it or lose it

Capital Expenditures – use it or lose it

I recently had the my first experience consulting on the purchase of a SaaS platform along with constructing the game plan of phasing out our former proprietary system. What I learned is worth sharing…

Business expenses are controlled through (amongst other things) two factors. Employees and Capital expenditures.

Hundreds of thousands of dollars are determined by meetings that take place over the…

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[alexdaro]

The return to nature  —  we have opted out of corporate culture

The return to nature  —  we have opted out of corporate culture

ev·o·lu·tion ˌevəˈlo͞oSH(ə)n/

noun the process by which different kinds of living organisms are thought to have developed and diversified from earlier forms during the history of the earth.

Let’s deconstruct the corporate business culture. Team building lunches, cultural ambassadors, amazing benefits and overall security. Tribes of people focusing on a myriad of company…

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[alexdaro]

Psychedelic trip without the near death experience – my first trip into a sensory deprivation tank

Psychedelic trip without the near death experience – my first trip into a sensory deprivation tank

Today is my first experience stepping into a sensory deprivation tank.

I have always had a strong desire to reach deep down into the caverns of my mind. Whether that be dosing in psychedelics in my late teens and early twenties, or whether that be my daily mediation practice. Stepping into the unknownwhile simultaneously enhancing the senses is something that I encourage everyone to do at least…

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[alexdaro]

Consistency - how to optimize your consistency ratio

Consistency – how to optimize your consistency ratio

Consistency

“Conformity in the application of something, typically that which is necessary for the sake of logic, accuracy, or fairness.”

Consistency is one of the most sought after and honorable social conformities in todays modern world. Whether that be showing up to work everyday, unconditionally loving your wife or tirelessly working on your craft – consistency is a pattern for true success.

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[alexdaro]

Bare feet on cold concrete - The Morning Routine

Bare feet on cold concrete – The Morning Routine

Morning Routine

There’s something about the morning that strikes conflict. For some people the morning is cold, slow – a little crusty eyed. Rolling out of our warm beds into the frostbitten world is an accomplishment in and of itself.

When my Wife and I married in August 2014 we did so in Bali, Indonesia. We stayed at the Alila Hotel Resort.

It’s really a magical place. The gazebo where our…

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[alexdaro]

What's your time worth?

What’s your time worth?

TIME

Time. Can we put a physical value on it? You’ve probably heard that time should be treated as a commodity, and i’m here to tell you that it certainly should.

So what’s time? Now the next few sentences might be a bit esoteric, so stay with me here. Time is variable in the sense that it’s relative to motion. Think of the word simultaneous, does it apply to physical acts separated by large…

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[alexdaro]

Mormon Church Publishes Essay On Founder Joseph Smith's Polygamy

[alexdaro]

Climate Change To Make Lightning More Common, Study Says